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Authors: Jerry Bridges

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BOOK: The Practice of Godliness: Godliness has value for all things
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ABSOLUTE HONESTY
Daniel was not corrupt; he was honest, ethical, and principled. Absolute honesty in speech and in personal affairs has to be the hallmark of a faithful person. The Scriptures tell us, “The Lord detests lying lips, but he delights in men who are truthful,” and “The Lord abhors dishonest scales, but accurate weights are his delight” (Proverbs 12:22 and 11:1). The Lord detests lying and abhors dishonest business transactions. Not only are we commanded not to lie; we are also commanded not to deceive in any manner (Leviticus 19:11).
Lying has been defined as “any deceit: in word, act, attitude—or silence; in deliberate exaggerations, in distortions of the truth, or in creating false impressions.”
2
We lie or deceive when we pretend to be something we are not; when as students we cheat on an examination, or as taxpayers we fail to report all of our income. My friend Jerry White writes of struggling over how much to tell a prospective buyer about a used car.
3
The issue of honesty pervades every area of our lives.
On Christmas Eve our doorbell rang, and when I answered it, I found a little four-year-old neighbor girl holding out a plate of cookies. “My mommy sent you some cookies,” she said with a big smile. I thanked her and put the cookies down someplace—and promptly forgot about them, for we were just leaving for a Christmas Eve church service. A few days later as I was walking out to my car, the little girl came down the sidewalk on her tricycle. “Mr. Bridges, how’d you like the cookies?” she asked in great anticipation. “Oh, they were fine,” I said, though I had not even tasted them.
As I drove away I began to think about what I had said. I had lied; there was no question about it. Why had I done it? Because it was expedient; it saved me embarrassment and the little girl disappointment (though mostly I was concerned about myself, not her). Sure, it was only a social lie, of little or no consequence. But it was a lie, and God says without qualification that He detests lying.
As I thought of that incident I began to realize it wasn’t an isolated instance. The Holy Spirit reminded me of other occasions of seemingly innocent “social lying,” of instances of exaggeration, or manipulating the facts of a story just a bit. I had to face the fact that I was not quite as honest as I had considered myself to be. God taught me a valuable, though humbling, lesson through that plate of cookies.
As I have told the story of the cookies to some audiences, I have gotten a troubled reaction from a few people. Some people, sincere Christians, think I may be nit-picking, going a bit too far in this matter of absolute honesty. But consider Daniel. The record states that his enemies could find no corruption in him. It seems clear that these government officials, from their bitter jealousy and utter hostility toward Daniel, would have seized upon any inconsistency, regardless of how small or insignificant, to bring Daniel into disrepute before King Darius. But they could find none. Daniel, like Elijah, was a man with a nature just like ours (James 5:17), but he had evidently mastered this matter of absolute integrity. We should have the same goal.
Think of the Lord Jesus. One day He asked His enemies, “Can any of you prove me guilty of sin?” (John 8:46). If Jesus had ever distorted the truth even a little bit, He could not have asked that question with such total confidence. We are called to be like Jesus—to be as absolutely honest as He was. How would Jesus have handled the little neighbor girl’s question about the cookies? I don’t know what He would have said. But one thing I know; He would not have lied. And neither should you or I.
Why do I go into such detail about absolute honesty in the social minutiae of life? Because this is where honesty begins. If we are careful to be honest in the little things, we will certainly be careful to be honest in the more important things of life. If we are honest about the cookies in our lives, we will certainly be honest in our business transactions, our college examinations, and even our sports competitions. As Jesus said, “He who is faithful in a very little thing is faithful also in much; and he who is unrighteous in a very little thing is unrighteous also in much” (Luke 16:10, NASB).
Our age desperately needs to reemphasize honesty in both its business transactions and its social intercourse. I recall reading an article in one of our leading business journals that quoted a number of executives as saying it was impossible to succeed in business today without compromising the truth. Probably the same attitude prevails in politics, sports, and every other aspect of our society. But we Christians are called to be salt in a putrefying society, and we cannot be such if we are not models of absolute honesty.
UTTER DEPENDABILITY
Daniel was neither corrupt nor negligent: He was reliable and dependable. People could count on him. He undoubtedly was on time for his appointments, kept his commitments, honored his word, and considered how his actions might affect others.
Few things are more vexing than relying on someone who is not dependable. Solomon observed, “As vinegar to the teeth and smoke to the eyes, so is a sluggard to those who send him” (Proverbs 10:26). Though the term
sluggard
refers to a habitually lazy person, it is his unfaithfulness that makes him exasperating. We may be indifferent about a lazy person’s habits if we do not have to rely on him. But if we are dependent upon his actions in any way, we see his slothful habits as unfaithfulness.
If our society needs to reemphasize the virtue of honesty, it certainly needs to place great importance on dependability. Dependability has taken a decided back seat to personal desire or convenience. “I’ll keep that commitment if it’s convenient,” seems to be the attitude of our age. John Sanderson has perceptively observed,
If we probe a bit deeper, we see that “unfaithfulness” is very close to “disobedience,” for the man who disobeys God has cast himself loose from the only solid support a man can have, and his direction in life will be controlled by the shifting winds of circumstances and of his whimsical desire.... The man who is not controlled by God has no settled reason to keep his word or discharge his obligations.
4

 

For the person who is practicing godliness, then, dependability is a duty owed not only to his fellow man, but more importantly to God. Reliability is not just a social obligation; it is a spiritual obligation. God is even more concerned about our faithfulness than the person who is relying on us in some particular situation.
In Psalm 15, David asks the question, “Lord, who may dwell in your sanctuary? Who may live on your holy hill?” There follows a list of ethical standards that a person must keep to enjoy God’s fellowship. And in the middle of that list there is this standard: He “who keeps his oath even when it hurts.” God wants us to be dependable even when it costs us. This is what distinguishes godly faithfulness from the ordinary dependability of secular society.
Consider the teenager who agrees to baby-sit for a neighbor on a given evening. Then a young man calls and invites her to the football game on that same night. What is she to do? Does she just simply cancel her baby-sitting arrangement and leave the neighbor to find someone else? The godly teenager will keep her commitment even when it hurts. Or, she might seek to find a substitute agreeable to the neighbor. In either case she feels a responsibility before God to honor her commitment and to fulfill her responsibility.
Lest I appear to be singling out teenagers as especially vulnerable to the temptation to treat commitments lightly, consider the businessman who enters into an agreement only to discover that it is quite to his disadvantage. What is he to do? The nonChristian is most apt to contact his lawyer to see if there is some legal loophole through which he can get out of the contract. Unfortunately, many Christians will seek the same relief. Not so the godly businessman. He may indeed see if there is some resolution to his dilemma that is acceptable to the other party. But he will not renege on his word just because it is legally possible to do so. He will keep his word even when it hurts.
Between these two extremes of the merely inconvenient baby-sitting engagement and the financially disastrous business agreement, there are numerous instances in which all of us make commitments that from time to time may prove costly to keep. At times such as these we especially need, by God’s grace, to manifest the fruit of the Spirit that is faithfulness.
UNSWERVING LOYALTY
The faithful person is not only honest and dependable, but also loyal. As an issue, loyalty arises most often in connection with our friends. The word has come to have a connotation of sticking with someone through thick and thin. There is perhaps no greater description of loyalty than Solomon’s words, “A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity” (Proverbs 17:17).
There is no such person as a “fair-weather friend.” If a person’s loyalty doesn’t insure his faithfulness to another in times of stress, then he really isn’t a friend. He is simply using the other person to satisfy some of his own social needs.
King Saul’s son, Jonathan, provides probably the best illustration of loyalty in the Bible. His loyal friendship with David almost cost him his life at the hands of his own father. Amazingly, Jonathan realized that his loyalty to David would, in the end, cost him the throne of Israel. Whether it be in honesty or dependability or loyalty, faithfulness is frequently a costly virtue. Only the Holy Spirit can enable us to pay that price.
There is a kind of loyalty that we must avoid, however: a so-called “blind loyalty.” This kind refuses to admit the mistakes or faults of a friend, and it is actually a disservice. Proverbs tells us, “The kisses of an enemy may be profuse, but faithful are the wounds of a friend” (Proverbs 27:6). Only the truly faithful friend cares enough about you or me to undertake the often thankless task of pointing out where we are wrong. None of us enjoys being confronted with our faults or sins or mistakes, so we often make it difficult for our friends to do so. As a result, most of us are more concerned about speaking agreeableness to each other than about speaking the truth. This is
not
loyalty. Loyalty speaks the truth in faithfulness, but it also speaks it in love. Loyalty says, “I care enough about you that I will not allow you to continue unchecked in your wrong action or sinful attitude that will ultimately be harmful to you.”
MEETING GOD’S REQUIREMENT
As with the other graces of Christian character, the first step in growing in faithfulness is to acknowledge the biblical standard. Faithfulness entails absolute honesty, utter dependability, and unswerving loyalty. It is to be like Daniel: neither corrupt nor negligent. Develop convictions consistent with this standard based on the word of God. Plan to memorize one or more verses on the topic of faithfulness, either from the references cited in this chapter, or from others that may have come to your mind.
Second, evaluate your life with the aid of the Holy Spirit and perhaps a spouse or close friend. Do you seek to be scrupulously honest? Can others depend on you even when it is costly? Will you stick by your friend when he is in difficulty, and will you confront him in love when he is wrong? Don’t be satisfied with generalities. Try to think of specific instances that either affirm your faithfulness or show you where you need to grow.
Where you see a specific need for faithfulness, make that both a matter of prayer for the aid of the Holy Spirit and the object of some concrete actions on your part. Remember that your working and His working are coextensive. You cannot become a faithful person merely by trying. There is a divine dimension. But it is also true that you will not become a faithful person without trying. Jesus said to the church in Smyrna, “Be faithful, even to the point of death” (Revelation 2:10). This is something we must do, even though it is at the same time the fruit of the Spirit.
Consider the reward for faithfulness. In the parable of the talents, the master replied, “Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things. Come and share your master’s happiness!” (Matthew 25:21). It may be argued that the faithfulness here is in relation to God, rather than to one another, as we have been discussing in this chapter. That is indeed true. But faithfulness to God
includes
faithfulness to one another. That is the ultimate point of each of the Scripture passages we have considered. It is God who requires that we be faithful in all of our earthly relationships. So only if we seek to grow in the grace of faithfulness toward one another, will we have any hope of hearing Him say, “Well done, good and faithful servant.”
NOTES
1
Webster’s New Collegiate Dictionary
(Springfield, Mass.: G. & C. Merriam, 1974).
2
As quoted in
Character of the Christian,
book 4 of the STUDIES IN CHRISTIAN LIVING series, 1st ed. (Colorado Springs: NavPress, 1964), page 26.

 

3
Jerry White,
Honesty Morality & Conscience
(Colorado Springs: NavPress, 1978, 1996), page 53. I highly recommend this book for further study on the topic of honesty.
4
Sanderson,
The Fruit of the Spirit,
page 117.
BOOK: The Practice of Godliness: Godliness has value for all things
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