The Promises We Keep (Made for Love Book 1) (17 page)

“
Morning, boys.
”

“
You look a little tired, Ave,
”
I comment, looking between her and Gray. Her eyes flicker to meet his and then her gaze finds mine once more and I know, without a word, that Grayson sought sanctuary in their apartment last night. She shrugs, offering me a tired smile as she nods for us to step inside.

“
We
’
ll be ready to go in just a second,
”
she says through a yawn as she heads back to her room.

I shut us inside before I smack the back of my hand against Grayson
’
s chest.
“
You two drive me insane,
”
I mutter, sliding my hand into my pocket.

“
What was that for?
”

Usually, Grayson and Avery make me laugh. It
’
s obvious to everyone that they are head-over-heels in love with each other and yet neither of them will make a move. Today, knowing that my relationship with Addison is about to change in ways I can
’
t even really imagine, I
’
m infuriated that Gray and Ave are avoiding a relationship and taking for granted the unique gift that they have in each other.

“
One day, some guy is going to swoop in and sweep her right up from underneath your nose and you
’
re not going to know what hit you. On that day, I
’
m going to say
I told you so,
”
I bite.

“
Geez, what stick
’
s up your butt?
”
he mutters, taking a step away from me.

I exhale loudly, recognizing that I shouldn
’
t lash out at him. He
’
s not my problem.
“
Sorry,
”
I mumble as Addison emerges from her room. Just the sight of her makes me feel a thousand times better, and a million times worse. She looks beautiful in the sleeveless dress she
’
s wearing. It
’
s belted at the waist and stops just above her knees. It
’
s yellow, a color she pulls off impressively, and the contrast between the dress and her shiny black hair, which hangs at her shoulders, is stunning. I wish she didn't look so good; it makes me more irritable.

“
Hey, Gray. Morning, love,
”
she greets me with a smile. She pads her way across the room in her bare feet, her brown heels dangling from her fingers. She doesn
’
t stop until she
’
s in my arms. I hold her tightly against me, lifting her from her feet so that I might feel the length of her body pressed against mine. I breathe her in, relishing the smell of her fruity shampoo as I press a kiss against her temple.

“
Hey, baby.
”

“
Watch out, he
’
s grumpy this morning,
”
Grayson warns her.

“
Oh, yeah?
”
she responds, pulling away just enough to look into my eyes
—
which isn
’
t much, considering I
’
m not ready to let her go just yet.
“
I bet I can cheer him up,
”
she says with a smirk before her mouth finds mine.

Grayson groans as we kiss and calls for Sarah and Avery. I ignore him, needing this moment like the air that I breathe.

“
None of that. Time for church.
”
Avery smacks Addison
’
s backside, which elicits a small shriek that pulls her lips away from mine. It
’
s her laugh that follows that helps squash my disappointment in our separation. I set her down, so she can slip her feet into her shoes, which she does while holding my hand. She doesn
’
t let me go until we climb into my car.

Pastor Doug
’
s message does two things: it fills me the conviction that today is the day
—
the day I have to talk to Addison; it also makes me want to punch him in the face.

Having been gone the week before, attending my parents church back home, I forgot that he
’
s in the middle of a relationship series. I guess I missed the safe sermon that revolved around friendships. This week was about dating relationships. Next week is going to be about marriage relationships. I
’
m already considering skipping out on that message entirely. Yet, I know in my gut, it will be exactly what I need to hear
—
just like today
’
s message was exactly what God wanted me to hear.

Pastor Doug touched on the dos and don
’
ts of dating, as anyone would expect. He also went on and on and on about the benefits of finding yourself, working on yourself, improving yourself, preparing yourself and so on and so forth
while you
’
re single
—
because in the process of doing those things, you become the person your future spouse is waiting for; he honed in on that point, explaining that working on yourself yields better relationship results than constantly picking, judging, or comparing the person you
’
re with to the dream of the ideal man or woman you want to marry. While that
’
s not really my problem, as I already know that I don
’
t want anyone other than Addison
—
beautifully flawed and imperfectly perfect as she is
—
I don
’
t doubt for a second that
someone
was trying to get my attention all morning long.

Lunch plans are made, but I
’
m too distracted to pay attention to either suggestions or decisions. Addie pulls me from my thoughts as she caresses my cheek with her hand. When my eyes meet hers, I want to scream or pull her into my lap and kiss her senseless
—
but I do neither.

“
Are you okay?
”
she murmurs, worry tugging at her brow.

“
No,
”
I answer honestly.
“
I need to get out of here. I want to go home. Will you come with me?
”

“
Of course. Um
—
one sec.
”
I
’
m vaguely aware of her efforts to ensure that Sarah, Grayson, and Avery all have rides to lunch and then back home before she takes my hand, signaling that she
’
s ready to go. Addie knows me well and she doesn
’
t ask me to explain myself as we make our way to my vehicle and then drive in silence back to our apartment. Without a word, she follows me as I lead her back to her place
—
where I know we
’
ll be uninterrupted.

She shuts us inside and I
’
m so nervous and beside myself that I feel like my knees might give out, so I head straight for the couch and sit. She starts to sit in the space beside me, but I stop her, pulling her into my lap. I need her close to me. I can hardly believe this is happening
—
that I
’
m about to break up with her
—
and if I don
’
t have the weight of her pressing against me, I might not be able to believe this is real.

I run my hands along the soft skin of her arms and graze my fingertips down her sides and then up and around her back. I tangle my fingers in her hair, and every texture that I feel keeps me with her for another moment.

“
Beckham
…”
She speaks softly, but the sound of my name from her lips shatters me. The tears come without warning and I crush her against me, burying my face in her neck as I let my cries ravage me.

I gasp as a sob erupts from his throat and he clings to me. My arms wrap around him in an instant and I hold him as tightly as I can, rubbing my hands around his back and up his neck in an attempt to soothe him. He squeezes me in reply and I can barely breathe; but I can
’
t tell if it
’
s because he
’
s holding me too close or if it
’
s because I
’
m frightened and confused.

“
Beckham, babe, talk to me. What
’
s wrong?
”
It takes him another minute to gather himself, but when he pulls away to look me in the eyes, I know something is terribly wrong.
“
You
’
re scaring me. You have to say something.
”

“
I
’
ve been thinking
—
thinking about us,
”
he manages.

I wasn
’
t expecting that. My heart skips a beat.

“
I
’
ve been thinking about us and marriage and how you deserve to be with someone who is ready to promise you forever and
…”
His voice trails off and my heart skips another beat.
“…
I
’
m not him,
”
he whispers.

For a second, I can
’
t breathe. I could not have heard what I think I just heard.
“
What?
”
I squeak.

“
Addison, I think we need to take a break for a while.
”

I gasp and recoil at his words. I
’
m hearing things. I
must
be hearing things. There is no way that he
’
s breaking up with me right now. That
’
s
not
what he said. It can
’
t possibly be what he said. He wouldn
’
t
—
he couldn
’
t
—“
What?
”
I ask again, sure that I
’
ll hear something different.

A renegade tear spills from his eye and races down his cheek as he speaks.
“
I think we need to break up for a while.
”

This time, I hear him
—
this time, I know I
’
m not imagining things. This time, his words hit their mark and I no longer have control over my body.
“
What?!
”
I stammer as my vision blurs and my eyes fill with tears.
“
What?!
”
I cry, unable to find any other words as I ball my hands into fists.
“
WHAT?!
”
I scream as I push him away from me. He wraps his arms around me and his strong hold makes it impossible to wiggle out of his grasp.