The Rancher's Adopted Family (2 page)

Amy had been left with the impression that Seth Reardon was dangerous.

Even Rachel had admitted that Seth had been cool and distant at first, until she’d got to know him. Not that Amy would allow her mind to dwell on thoughts of Rachel and Seth becoming familiar…

Or intimate.

The very idea…of Seth Reardon making love…was like a close encounter with a lightning bolt.

He sent a frowning glance to the window and Amy saw that it had started to rain rather heavily. ‘When you phoned last week you said you planned to take photographs, but this weather’s going to rule that out. I did try to warn you that this is the wet season.’

‘I suppose I could take photos of the rain. Rachel might have written about the wet season.’

‘I doubt it. She was here in the dry season, in the winter.’

‘Oh, yes, of course.’

Seth frowned at her. ‘Haven’t you read her book?’

‘Actually…no.’

Her friend had been uncharacteristically protective about this story and she’d never offered Amy so much as a peek at the manuscript.

After the accident, Amy hadn’t liked to search through the files on Rachel’s computer. It had felt too much like snooping. She had sat down once to read a section of Rachel’s poetry, but she’d been overcome by grief. It was like hearing Rachel’s voice—and the thoughts expressed had been too intensely personal.

Amy had been in tears as she’d shut down the computer.

She hadn’t opened it again.

Seth’s eyes widened. ‘How do you plan to promote this book, then?’

‘These are early days, and I’m just starting my research. I have the publisher’s back-cover copy, and a picture of the front cover. It’s rather beautiful. Would you like to see it?’

She dug a folder out of her bag, and handed it to him. The book’s cover depicted a balmy tropical beach at sunset with palm trees and white sand. Distant islands floated in the background, and the sun melted into a smooth golden sea.

‘I know it’s not very accurate,’ she admitted, sending another glance out of the window. She’d been dismayed by Tamundra’s rather desolate main street and the drab gum trees beyond it, and red earth that stretched for miles. She was pretty sure the whole of Cape York looked just as bad, so the cover was deceptive to say the least.

Seth Reardon shrugged. ‘There are sections on the eastern edge of Serenity that look exactly like that.’

‘Oh.’ Amy looked again at the idyllic palm trees and golden sand and felt her jaw drop with surprise.

Seth’s blue eyes froze her. ‘You haven’t done your homework, Amy Ross.’

‘I—I’ve done my best,’ she spluttered. ‘I—I told you I’ve only just started. It’s only two months since Rachel died and I—I’ve been busy. With Bella.’

They both looked down at Bella, who was sprawled on the carpet, busy with a scrapbook and fat crayons.

‘My drawing Amy,’ the little girl announced proudly as she made a lopsided circle with a purple crayon. ‘An’ here’s Amy’s eyes.’

Happily, Bella drew small purple squiggles inside the circle.

Amy gave her an encouraging smile. ‘That’s lovely, Bella. Now draw my mouth.’

A small sigh escaped Seth and he lifted his gaze from the child and studied Amy.

She resisted an urge to squirm beneath his scrutiny. It was important to appear calm and in control.

‘I’d like to know more about Rachel’s stay up here,’ she said, hoping to convince Seth that she wasn’t wasting his time. ‘What kind of work was she doing? How did she fit into life on a cattle station?’

To her dismay, his frown deepened. With a long brown finger he tapped the book’s back cover blurb. ‘But the answers to your questions are right here.’

‘They’re generalities,’ she countered, desperately trying to ignore the niggling of her conscience that told her he was right. ‘I’m looking for details.’

His expression was immediately guarded. ‘What kind of details?’

Amy gulped. ‘Nothing too personal.’

His frown deepened and she felt her face redden.

‘I’m looking for anything quirky or interesting,’ she
said. ‘Rachel was a city girl. I doubt she’d ever touched a cow before she came here, or cooked on an open fire, or slept in a swag on the ground.’

Abruptly, Seth stood, making his chair scrape on the wooden floor. He strode to the window, where he leaned a shoulder against the wall, looking out into the rain as he thrust his hands into his jeans pockets.

‘I’m afraid you’ve wasted your time.’

‘What do you mean?’ She knew she sounded too scared, but was he going to refuse to take her to Serenity?

Seth’s eyes narrowed. ‘If you’ve come all this way in search of scandal to spice up the promotion, you should leave now,’ he said.

‘Scandal?’ Amy was dumbfounded. ‘Why would I want to tarnish my best friend’s name?’

‘For money? To sell more books? You’re in marketing, aren’t you?’

‘How dare you?’

Seth shrugged again. ‘Whatever. But you haven’t been straight with me.’

Oh, help. Already he was pushing her towards making her confession. But if she told him about his daughter now, he might be so immediately shocked and angry that he stormed back to his cattle station alone, without giving her a chance to really discuss what was best for Bella.

‘Rachel was my best friend,’ Amy told him, softly. ‘And—and I’ve lost her.’

She tried to go on, but suddenly the difficult, grief-filled weeks since Rachel’s death seemed to overwhelm her. It had been a nightmare trying to deal with the horror of her best friend’s death while taking on the responsibility of her little daughter.

She’d been trying so hard to do everything right, including coming all this way.

Now, on the brink of failure, Amy couldn’t look at Seth, didn’t want him to see her tears.

‘Look,’ he said suddenly, clearly uncomfortable with her evident emotion, ‘I’m prepared to take your word.’

Her head snapped up.

Grimly, he said, ‘But if you’re coming to Serenity with me, we’d better get cracking, before this weather really sets in.’

Her jaw dropped, she was so surprised by his sudden hasty about-face.

‘Did you drive here from Cairns?’ he asked brusquely.

Amy blinked. ‘Yes. I hired a car.’

‘A small sedan?’

‘Yes.’

‘With four-wheel-drive capability?’

She shook her head.

‘You’d better travel in my vehicle, then,’ he said quietly and with grim resignation.

Seth was actually offering her a lift. Was it wise to accept? Would he also be willing to drive her back here in two days’ time?

‘Wouldn’t it be simpler if I followed you in my car?’ she said.

‘The road’s too rough and in this rain it’ll be slippery. I don’t want you or your little daughter’s safety on my conscience. But let’s not waste time. It’s a long drive.’

S
ETH
wasn’t exaggerating his desire for a hasty departure.

Fortunately, Bella didn’t kick up a fuss when she was suddenly strapped into a booster seat in the back of his dual-cabin ute. The little girl was mildly puzzled, but she’d lunched on Vegemite and cheese sandwiches, a banana and milk, so she obligingly fell asleep soon after they left Tamundra.

Rain streamed down the windows, making the sky and the trees a grey blur. Amy could see nothing but a small view, cleared by the wipers, of the muddy red track in front of the vehicle.

Apparently it would be dark by the time they got to Seth’s property, but despite the prospect of a long journey he didn’t seem inclined to talk. Whenever Amy stole a glance his way, he looked utterly relaxed and competent, his sun-browned hands resting lightly on the steering wheel as he skilfully negotiated the rough and slippery surface.

Amy supposed he would look equally relaxed and competent on the back of a horse, or driving a tractor.

She was surprised that she wasn’t more worried about heading into the wilderness with a man she hardly
knew. Seth Reardon was different from almost any man she’d ever met, and she could totally understand how Rachel had been both attracted to him, and cautious about sharing her life with him.

He was clearly at ease in his own skin, but he had the wary intelligence of a loner—the Outback equivalent of street smarts, she supposed. More than likely, he never allowed anyone to get too close, which meant it wasn’t going to be easy to find the right moment to tell him that Bella was his daughter.

And yet, the weight of her secret loomed large. She would be relieved to finally get it off her chest.

Needing to make conversation, she asked tentatively, ‘Have you lived here on Cape York all your life?’

Seth shook his head. ‘I moved up here when I was twelve.’

Amy waited for him to expand on this and when he didn’t, she dived in with more questions. It was ridiculous to waste this golden opportunity for a getting-to-know-you chat.

‘Where did you live before that?’

‘In Sydney.’

‘Really?’

‘Does that surprise you?’ he asked, sliding a quick glance her way.

‘I was expecting you to say that you moved here from another cattle property in Queensland.’ Bustling, metropolitan Sydney was as alien to this environment as her own home in Melbourne. ‘Coming here must have been a big change for you.’

Seth nodded. ‘I came after my father died, to live with my uncle.’

‘So it was a very big change,’ Amy said quietly, and
she was unexpectedly moved by the thought of him as a grieving, lonely boy, on the cusp of adolescence, leaving his friends in the city to live so far away.

She wanted to ask him about his mother. Why hadn’t she been able to look after him when his father died? Why had he been moved into an uncle’s care?

A glance at the set lines in Seth’s face, however, silenced further questions.

The rain continued as they drove on.

The relentless downpour and Seth’s rather grim silence were enough to make Amy feel sorry for herself. It wasn’t her habit to be self-pitying, but the weeks since Rachel’s accident had been rough and she wasn’t quite sure how she’d managed, actually.

She’d made the decision to care for Bella swiftly. On the night of the accident she’d gone to Rachel’s house, numb with shock, and paid the sitter, then tiptoed into the little room where Bella lay innocently asleep.

She’d looked down at the little girl’s soft, chubby-cheeked face, at her closed eyes and her soft, dark eyelashes and her heart had almost broken.

There’d been no question. She had to devote herself to caring for Rachel’s daughter. A succession of babysitters could never provide the round-the-clock security and stability a two-year-old needed.

But the transition from marketing to motherhood hadn’t been easy, especially when in the midst of it all, Amy’s boyfriend, Dominic, had suggested that they both needed time out…to give each other some space.

Amy had known it was the thin edge of the wedge that would crack their relationship irreparably apart. Dominic was jealous of the closeness she’d quickly developed with Bella. He’d started to snap at the little girl
when she’d innocently interrupted his computer games. Being upfront as usual, Amy had told him that things had to change now that Bella had arrived.

In the end they’d had the most appallingly ugly and bitter row over Bella. Dominic couldn’t see why Amy should automatically assume responsibility.

The fact that she’d been named as Bella’s guardian was a mere technicality, he said. It didn’t mean she had to care for the child day in, day out—which proved that, after almost twelve months together, he didn’t really know Amy at all.

She’d reminded him that he was living in her house, that she always had to jog his memory to get him to pay for his share of the food, the phone and the electricity, and she’d also let him know how annoying it was when he disappeared into the spare room and spent hours on computer games, racking up a huge Internet bill as well.

Whether Dominic had left her or whether she’d finally shown him the door was academic now. The whole catastrophe had been draining, and Amy might have collapsed in a complete heap if Bella hadn’t been so resilient and such an utter darling.

It was amazing how quickly the little girl had transferred her trust to Amy, and the nights when she’d cried for her mummy had gradually lessened, but it still cut Amy to the core that she was now the focus of the little girl’s love, the love that rightly belonged to Rachel.

She’d get weepy, though, if she thought too much about that.

For much of the journey the vehicle rattled down a long straight track, which every so often climbed a low hill, then dipped down again to cross a rising creek. Yesterday, on her journey north to Tamundra, the creeks
had been mere trickles, but already these gullies had begun to swell with fast-flowing muddy water.

Seth drove in silence and Amy felt the beginnings of a tension headache. She let her head fall back and tried again to relax as she watched the rain slide down her window. Every so often she caught the blurred outlines of cattle hunched together in mobs, looking desolate. A stalwart few continued to graze, apparently untroubled by the driving rain.

Bella woke up and was immediately chirpy and eager.

‘Moo cow!’ she announced importantly. And then ‘Moo! Moo!’ over and over.

Amy stole glances in Seth’s direction and she was quietly pleased to catch him smiling at Bella’s enthusiasm.

He looked incredibly gorgeous when he smiled.

Amy wondered if he’d been infatuated by Rachel. Most guys had been. Had there been other girlfriends since? She supposed there wouldn’t be too many available women here in the wilderness, but perhaps there was a beautiful girl who waited impatiently in Cairns for Seth’s visits.

‘How long were you and Rachel friends?’ Seth asked suddenly, much to Amy’s surprise.

At first she was nervous that he’d guessed the direction of her thoughts, and almost as quickly she worried that he’d somehow made the link between Bella and Rachel. But he looked too relaxed, and Amy let out a huff of relief.

Actually, she was really pleased that he wanted to talk, especially to talk about Rachel. It would pave the way for the news she had to share.

‘Rachel and I were both fifteen when we met,’ she told him, ‘and we were in hospital, having our appendixes out.’

‘Ouch. I suppose you cheered each other up,’ he suggested with a smile.

Heavens. A smile
and
conversation. Things were looking up.

Amy returned his smile. ‘We had a great time. We were in a small hospital run by nuns and we had beds side by side in a room to ourselves. We soon discovered we were in the same year at school, so we had tons to talk about.’

‘And you stayed in touch afterwards?’

She nodded. ‘Rachel went to a very snobby, private girls’ college and I went to an ordinary co-ed state school, so we didn’t see much of each other, but we kept in email contact. And we got together on weekends sometimes. Rachel even came away with my family to the beach for the summer holidays.’

‘You really clicked,’ Seth said quietly.

‘We did, and then we ended up at Melbourne University, and that’s when we truly became best friends.’

She took a packet of butterscotch from her bag. ‘Would you like one of these?’

‘Thanks.’

‘I’ll unwrap it for you.’ Carefully, she untwisted the ends of the paper and as she offered him the sweet his hand bumped hers. She felt a zap of electricity that made her gasp.
Good grief
. She shouldn’t be getting the hots for this guy.

To cover the reaction she said quickly, ‘I suppose you went to a boarding school.’

Seth nodded, and finished chewing before he said, ‘I used to fly down to school in Townsville.’

‘I’ve always thought boarding school would be great fun.’

‘Yeah. We had plenty of fun.’ He looked genuinely happy as he said this.

‘And what about after school?’ Amy prompted, more tentatively. ‘Did you go straight back to your uncle’s property?’

An almost imperceptible sigh escaped Seth. ‘I spent a year in England, playing rugby.’

She was so surprised she almost cried out. She struggled to picture Seth Reardon in a rugby jersey on a soft green English playing field, surrounded by his teammates. He was athletic, certainly, but was he a team player?

She’d had him pegged as a natural-born loner. ‘Was it hard to come back to Cape York?’

‘Not at all.’

He said this quickly, almost too quickly, and his eyes became very bright and hard, as if he was warding off any further discussion.

After that, they continued their journey in silence once more, while Amy’s mind seethed with unasked questions. There were so many gaps in Seth’s story, things he plainly had no intention of sharing with her. Where was his mother? Was she dead too? Did he miss Sydney? Or rugby? Or England?

Most of all, she wondered if he really liked living on Cape York. If he didn’t, why had he stayed up here in the north? If he’d been willing to move south, he and Rachel and Bella might have been a family.

One thing was becoming very clear to her, however. She’d underestimated Seth Reardon.

She’d come north with the vague idea that she’d meet a guy wearing an Akubra hat, a suntan and a smile. She’d imagined an attractive, but uncomplicated, country fellow, who’d had an affair with her best friend
and who now deserved to know that the affair had resulted in…consequences.

She’d been a fool to think that it would be easy and straightforward to share the news about Bella with him.

Twisting around in her seat, she looked back at Bella, who’d dozed off again, but then woken up to gaze around the interior of the vehicle with a slightly dazed frown. Amy felt her heart swell with love for the dear, innocent little scrap.

It was hard to believe that she’d grown so close to her in two short months, but the truth was her emotional connection to Rachel’s daughter was so strong at times it shocked her.

They’d been on quite a journey together, she and this little girl, as they’d slowly learned to cope with unbearable loss, and to live with each other.

To love each other.

These days, more often than not, Amy woke when Bella bounced into her bed, eager to greet her with hugs and kisses and laughter.

With Bella, Amy had discovered the joy of simply being alive. She’d relearned the pleasure of simple things like trips to the park to feed the ducks, riding slippery slides, and splashing in wading pools. She’d forgotten that it could be so much fun to blow bubbles at bath time, or to share bedtime picture books.

Already, it was hard to remember a time when corporate launches with champagne cocktails and gourmet canapés had been vitally, crucially important.

More often than not, meal preparation these days involved oatmeal or boiled eggs and toast soldiers, and bunny-shaped mugs of milk. Amy had learned to always carry an extra bag, to accommodate Bella’s sunhat and
a change of clothes, as well as a drink and a banana, or tiny packets of sultanas for snacks.

Her life in marketing had been put on hold.

Being self-employed had made the transition possible—not easy, but possible—but there was a limit to how long she could continue this lifestyle without earning. She’d already gobbled up a major chunk of her savings. Luckily, she had no big debts hanging over her, but she knew she would have to return to work soon.

Just the same, she certainly hadn’t come looking for Bella’s father because she needed his financial help. Caring for Bella might require a few sacrifices, but Amy knew she would manage.

Eventually, they stopped at a gate and Seth got out to open it.

‘Are we almost there?’ Amy asked hopefully when he got back into the car. Bella was grizzling more loudly now. ‘Is this Serenity?’

‘This is one of the boundary gates,’ he said as he steered the vehicle between timber fence posts. ‘I’m afraid it’ll be another half-hour before we reach the homestead.’

Another half-hour
…It was already dusk, and growing dark quickly because of the rain. Amy found it hard to imagine owning so much land that you could drive across it for such a long time.

Seth got out again to shut the gate, and when he came back he said, ‘Would you like to let Bella out for a bit, to stretch her legs?’

‘I’m sure she’d love that, but it’s raining.’

‘You have raincoats, don’t you?’

‘Well, yes.’

Seth shrugged. ‘This is the tropics, after all. The rain’s not cold.’

‘You’re right.’ In a matter of moments, Amy found their raincoats, which she’d packed in an outside pocket of her suitcase, and she was buttoning Bella into hers. She glanced at Seth, who was standing alone…looking…not lonely, surely?

A sudden instinct prompted her to ask, ‘Are you coming to walk with us?’

For the first time, Seth lost his air of cool certainty. His bright eyes rested on Bella’s eager face peering up at him from beneath the yellow hood of her raincoat. The lines of his face softened, then broke into a smile.