The Regal Rules for Girls (43 page)

Although London is still dotted with iconic red “phone boxes”—they are becoming dangerously obsolete since everyone has a “mow-bile.” (Note that “mobile” should rhyme with
tile
—
not
with
noble
.)

The Carphone Warehouse is an oddly named UK chain that will help you compare and contrast the various phone companies available. Deals change all the time so every twelve months, check your options to see if you should switch providers. Some companies offer free calls to your top three US phone numbers. Others will give you a free 1-800 number that friends and family can use to call you in London if they don’t have international dialing. Ask around and see what’s out there. Don’t forget to use your UK phone as little as humanly possible when back home in the US, as the roaming charges are extortionate.

Note: Getting a UK landline (and wireless broadband) connected in a new flat can take up to
six weeks
—so make sure you have alternative means for communication during this time.

If you live in London, you’re likely to walk at least two to three miles a day—probably more. Want to burn off last night’s Pinot Grigio? All you have to do is make sure you walk up the steps of the escalators rather than stand. This, combined with the UK’s teeny portion sizes, means that it is much easier to stay fit in England than it is in the US (the land of cars and all-you-can-eat buffets).

Still, all those liquid calories can take their toll, and in an effort to counteract the damage, I shocked myself and joined a gym. I figured it would give me something do on the nights that I forbid myself to go out. (Many UK companies offer discounted rates to their employees, so take advantage of this if you can.)

However, a monthly gym membership can still be expensive, and it wasn’t long before I had to acknowledge that structured
exercise bored me senseless. Knowing I had to try something new, I ventured into a yoga studio. The first time I tried yoga, my arms were literally too weak for downward dog. But I persevered and to my surprise began to
like
it—a feeling toward physical activity I was certain never to possess. I like yoga because it is so much more than exercise—it’s a philosophy, a way of life, it clears all that chatter in your mind,
and
it happens to involve amusing animal poses that help me not to be so bored.

My quest for affordable pay-as-you-go yoga classes led me to one of the best yoga centers in the world: The Life Centre is a sanctuary of tranquility—but they work you hard. After ninety minutes here I feel 90 percent more grounded than I did when I walked in. I can’t recommend it enough.
www.thelifecentre.com

Long to be as toned as royal sister-in-law Pippa Middleton? Her stunning figure has been a talking point since the royal wedding (the girl’s bottom actually trended on Twitter), and now her fitness secret is out. Pippa goes to weekly pilates sessions at Pilates on the Go in Fulham’s Parsons Green. You can even see her testimonial on their website. Make sure to request Margo Campbell as an instructor.
www.pilatesonthego.co.uk

If you prefer to exercise outdoors, all London parks offer various fitness classes, which are a great way to get some fresh air and meet people in your area. And if you really want to multi-task getting fit with getting a guy, there are always Scottish dancing events happening somewhere. (See “More Regal Hunting Grounds,”
page 169
). Still, I must reiterate that Chelsea Harbor Club is by far the best gym for meeting titled talent.
www.harbourclubchelsea.com
.

I’ll never forget the first time I had to fly home after spending my semester abroad in London. I was literally crying at Heathrow Airport, sobbing into the phone and begging my parents to let me stay in this land of my dreams just a little bit longer.

Yet things were different back then—flights weren’t as cheap as they are now, and many Americans were taught to believe that once they went to Europe, they would most likely never be back again, so best to see as much as you possibly could while you were there. But things have changed. Cheap flights occasionally
can
be found, and as the world gets smaller and smaller, we’ll find ourselves zigzagging across the oceans more and more.

Still, nothing is worse than trying to book your flight home and trawling through hundreds of travel sites trying to find something vaguely affordable—it makes me dizzy, and the longer I spend looking, the more expensive the flights become! But then I found Trailfinders, a travel agency that always manages to find the cheapest US flight available even if you’re going to a tiny American town no one has ever heard of (
www.trailfinders.com
). One phone call—and you’re done.

Don’t forget to join the frequent flier program of each airline you ever take—if you live in the UK long enough, one day all those extra miles will come in handy.

One thing that living in London teaches you is that Americans have way, way too much. They have too many cars, too many rooms in their houses, and too many things in each room. Because England is such a minuscule country and it contains so many people, you quickly learn to downsize your life into a smaller space. In the beginning it’s annoying and all you can do is grumble about how much space you used to have, but eventually the minimalist lifestyle begins to grow on you. And the upside of having no car and less space is that your spending is automatically curtailed.

The Fridge/Freezer Dilemma

So your fridge is the size of a small television and you probably share it with three other people. The good news? When you go grocery shopping (Waitrose is best in terms of quality, price, and ethical standards), you literally can only buy what fits on your designated refrigerator shelf. Because you didn’t drive to the grocery store, you literally can only buy items that you are physically strong enough to carry home with you. In reality, it was the latter that restrained my shopping more than anything. I’m not exactly Hercules, so lightweight food (asparagus, raspberries, dark chocolate) always took priority over heavier things like ice cream and potatoes. I may have been dying for a piece of cheesecake or chicken pot pie—but I knew I didn’t have the storage space to bring a family size home with me (nor did I have the strength to carry one!). No freezer (warning: most UK flats have no freezer!) to store things meant I could only buy fresh food—which forced me to plan my weekly menus carefully and pay close attention to expiration dates. So something as simple as a small kitchen appliance forced me not to overbuy, overeat, and overspend—and in that way, it taught me
not to be wasteful—something all those American shoppers with gigantic refrigerators probably will never learn in their lifetime.

The Washing Machine/Dryer Dilemma

So your washing machine is so tiny you sometimes wonder if you’d be better off washing your clothes in a mixing bowl? Not to mention that there is no dryer to speak of and you are expected to hang all of your wet clothing on hot radiators (that fill the already damp house with steam) or on pioneer-style drying racks? I promise you it’s not as depressing as it sounds—once you get used to it. As much as I love US washing facilities (mainly because they’re so large I can fit inside them), using that much energy and doing that much laundry (especially as a singleton) is simply not necessary (or environmentally viable). Back in college I was the type of girl who would occasionally buy more underwear
⁵
to avoid doing laundry—but let’s not talk about that since this is supposed to be about ideas for saving. But living in the UK taught me to embrace hand washing in a way that would make my grandmother proud. You don’t have to scrub your clothes against a washboard or anything grueling like that; all you have to do is fill the sink with water, pop in a capful of delicate detergent, and throw in your items. Let them soak while you are in the shower and then rinse them clean. Now that I say it, it really is like doing your laundry in a sink-shaped mixing bowl—but much safer since UK washing machines usually turn your clothes gray. (Also, beware of machines that claim to be
washers
and
dryers into one—they neither clean nor dry.) I only risk my gym clothes, sheets, and pajamas in that weird UK appliance—everything else is hand-washed or, occasionally, dry-cleaned.

You’ll find that because there are no dryers and clothes don’t come out soft and wrinkle-free, the Brits are
obsessed
with ironing. They all iron their sheets (and will gasp in
horror
if you admit that you don’t iron yours)—and I have personally witnessed several flatmates iron their jeans and underwear. I’m sorry, but that’s where I draw the line. Luckily, cashmere and tweed don’t require ironing.

A few months after I arrived in London, polo invitations weren’t exactly pouring into my hands as I’d hoped. I had no social life, my money was dwindling at a terrifying speed, and I honestly felt that I had nothing to do but sit in my dark London bedroom, repaint my toenails, recalculate my debt, and die of frustration.

And the craziest part was that I was absolutely miserable in the place I was certain would make me the happiest.

Still, if you know me at all—you’ll know that I am not easily daunted. After a few days of feeling sorry for myself, I’d had enough. When it comes to your surroundings, sometimes the smallest luxuries are all it takes to make a girl feel more like a princess than a pauper. Many of these are what I like to call “palace essentials”—
which basically means you need to ask yourself what Queen Elizabeth I would insist upon to brighten the dreary rooms of her palaces. So here are seven small…

WAYS TO MAKE YOUR LIFE MORE REGAL: