The (sort of) Dark Mage (Waldo Rabbit) (52 page)

“That’s not what I meant!”

“I am just trying to understand where the line is. I want to know who you are willing to steal from.”

“It’s very simple. Stealing is never all right. Even stealing from Roger was wrong. I was just willing to help because of where he grabbed me is all. I think from now on we should follow all the laws and not cause any trouble.”

“Have you forgotten who I really am Alice? Don’t let this brilliant disguise fool you. I am Waldo Corpselover, an evil and black hearted mage. I am without mercy or compassion. The laws and morals of ordinary men mean nothing to me. I am a living, breathing source of terror to all those who cross my path.”

Alice suddenly pointed behind him. “Oh, is that a rabbit?”

“WHERE?” He jumped about and his head jerked from side to side as he tried to spot the horrid beast.

Alice snickered. “Evil and black hearted mage, huh?”

Waldo stopped panicking and narrowed his eyes at her. “That wasn’t funny.”

“Yes it was.”

“You really do not have the proper attitude for a familiar.”

“That’s because I’m you wife darling, not your familiar or your servant.”

Waldo decided not to bother correcting her as it would do any good.

“Why didn’t you mention my being able to Charm before?”

“Why would I? I wouldn’t try to explain flying to a bird, or swimming to a fish.”

“But I told you before I didn’t know anything about what I was.”

“When I met you, you were working at an Inn. I simply assumed you were using your Charm instinctively. I was right. I just didn’t realize you were ignorant of the fact.”

“You don’t have to be mean about it you know. You have been very rude to me this morning. I’ve only been trying to help you.”

“Time is short,” he grunted.

“What does that mean?”

“It just means I have a lot of problems to deal with. Now come on, I want to see if this herb shop has anything useful in it.”

He picked up his pace.

XXX

Neither of them noticed the man carefully trailing after them.

XXX

The herbal shop was a crushing disappointment the moment Waldo entered.

In Alter there were three herbal shops that all specialized in providing mages with various spell components. They would have barrels filled with the most common ingredients such as mandrake, salt, and nightshade. On shelves would be jars with more select items such as wolfsbane, ground obsidian, elfroot, pickled goblin eyes, or ragweed. There would be supplies from all over the Shattered Lands. You could find cactus needles from the Zatarhn Desert, purple sea moss that only grew on the island of Lamos, ice peppers that only came from the far north, and all sorts of other difficult to acquire ingredients. They were expensive, but they were always available.

The shops also kept limited supplies of
truly
exotic materials locked away inside special vaults. Unicorn horn, dragon scales, vampire blood, medusa venom, and succubus tears were all worth more than their weight in gold. Such precious goods were not available in large quantities, but if you had enough gold you could usually find some in at least one of the shops. In Alter it was easy for a mage to acquire just about anything he might need for a spell or potion.

This was what Waldo thought of as the standard for what an herbal shop was supposed to be. So when he entered, ‘Toppa’s Herbs and Ingredients’ he was taken aback. The very first thing he noticed was that of the several customers already inside, all of them were women, and not a one of them wore a magic user’s robes. They all stared at him as though the presence of a mage were unusual here.

Not a good sign
, he thought.

As he began looking about his opinion was only confirmed. As Alice looked about her reaction was the exact opposite of his.

“Oh, they have fresh pepper! And sage and rosemary too! They have some nice onions and garlic!”

“They don’t have mandrake,” Waldo said in disbelief. “What sort of shop doesn’t carry mandrake? It’s the most basic ingredient.”

“What sort of food do you use mandrake for?”

“You don’t use it for food. You use it for all sorts of spells and potions.” He was going through the barrels that lined the front of the shop. Flour? Beans? Barley? Nuts? “What is this?”

“Can I help you good sir?” A middle aged woman with black hair streaked with grey came up to him.

“Master not sir,” Waldo said mechanically.

“I beg pardon?”

“My proper title is master not sir.” He motioned at the barrels in front of him. “Where is the mandrake?”

“Mandrake sir?”

“Master not sir.”

The woman stared at him uncertainly.

Waldo gave a frustrated sigh. “Where do you keep the mandrake?”

“We don’t carry mandrake si… ah, master?”

“How can you not have any mandrake? What sort of shop is this?”

“Darling, you’re being rude.” Alice came over to his side. “Please forgive my husband; it’s that time of the month for him.”

Waldo glared at her while the shopkeeper’s eyes tried to bulge out of their sockets.

“But… but… he’s a man, how can he…”

“Well he’s a wizard too, you know how they are, special connection to the moon’s cycle and all that. Some months when we match we have to fight over the rags.”

“Alice what are you doing?”

“Just explaining why you’re acting the way you are. By the way, next week be ready to be on the receiving end.”

The shopkeeper was twitching and slowly inching away. “I am sorry, but we don’t carry mandrake. Was there anything else?”

“Rose petals, I need rose petals.”

“We don’t carry those either.”

“Just what kind of shop are you?”

“We are a shop that sells herbs and ingredients for cooking. We don’t sell things that don’t flavor food. If you will excuse me.” She hurried to a pair of customers who didn’t appear to need any help.
 

“Just wonderful, rose petals are one of the key ingredients for making love potion.”

“I don’t know what you were expecting darling, none of the shops in Stratford carried those things either.”

“I was expecting them to carry the basics of an herbal shop. Obviously I was expecting too much for this country of savages.”

He did not bother to keep his voice down and was on the receiving end of some unpleasant stares.

“Maybe we should go,” Alice suggested. “Before they gather their torches and pitchforks.”

XXX

They stayed long enough to purchase salt and rosemary, then left.

“Well that was a complete waste. Calling that place an herbal shop is like calling a rabbit cute.”

Alice sighed. “Whatever you say, oh, and sorry.”

“Sorry for what?”

“This.” She yanked up her skirt and delivered a swift kick to his backside which sent him flying.

A White Mage sprawled out in the street was a rare sight, and the people walking by burst out laughing.

“What was that for?” Waldo got to his knees and rubbed his rear.

“That was for the way you’ve been acting all morning. You have been very rude to me and to everyone else. That was a little reminder for you to behave yourself. You’re usually very nice, so I don’t know why you’re acting this way.”

Waldo’s face darkened and he opened his mouth.

“I know, I know,” Alice said wearily. “You don’t like being called nice, though you
are
nice and I always mean it as a compliment.” She held a hand out to him.

Scowling Waldo got up to his feet without any help. “Words like nice, kind, and merciful all imply weakness. I cannot afford to be weak; I am alone in a world filled with ignorant barbarians. I have enemies all around me and am always in danger. And despite my best efforts I haven’t been able to move forward. Forgive me if I am not overly concerned with my manners.”

Alice crossed her arms over her chest and began to tap one foot. “Darling, you are not alone. I am always going to be at your side. I am your wife until death parts us. I will never abandon you, no matter how much trouble you are in or how badly you behave. I have faith in you. You are clever and brave, and I know you will find a way to solve our problems no matter how bad they look. So try to be a little more cheerful, all right?”

“Fine then, I will try and sound more jolly.” He began wiping some dirt off his not so pristine robes. “I suppose we may as well start searching again. At least we’re in a good place for it.”

The herb shop was located right near the main gate of Baden Hill.

Within Middleton the hills, all of them, were filled with iron ore. These hills provided easy access, and were all being mined heavily. Each of them was pockmarked with mine entrances, and roads had been dug into the sides, twisting all the way from top to bottom. Goblins worked in those mines, filling up carts with loads of ore to be hauled down to the forges.

At the base of each hill were brick penitentiaries where the goblins were crammed together. Except for those needed to pull wagons, none of them were every allowed to leave their dirty, overcrowded facilities. They labored until they died, and were then devoured by their hungry mates.

Surrounding these brick buildings was a wooden stockade, twenty feet high with several archers’ towers rising a further ten feet. The towers were always well manned. At the first sign of any sort of revolt they would fill the ground below with arrows and shout the alarm. There were thousands of goblins, each stronger and more violent than any ordinary man, the people took the threat of an uprising very seriously. Each stockade had a single massive gate that shut every night from sunset to sunrise. Dozens of guards served it during the day time, and could shut and bar it in a matter of a few minutes.

Ringing the outside of each hill was a series of forges. All day massive fires burned, they took the ore and separated the precious iron from the useless rock. They made bars of raw iron that were then sold to the various blacksmiths all over the city, who turned them into swords, nails, horseshoes, and all other manner of goods.

Since most of the monsters in the city were to be found in the confines of these hills, they were where Waldo had focused his efforts. Each day, he and Alice would follow the same route, visiting every hill as they tramped all over the city. They would stand in front of the open gate and Waldo would peer in, hoping to spot a distinctive aura. With so many monsters though, it had been like staring into a bonfire. If there really was a Great Monster working among all those goblins it was impossible to tell.

“We’ll start here today and go visit the others like we usually do.”

Alice nodded. “I’m sure we’ll find what we’re looking for today.”

“That would be nice.”

“You said you would be merrier dear.”

He turned to her and gave a wide, obviously false, smile. “Better?”

“I see someone wants to get kicked again.”

He stopped smiling and just continued walking up to the open gate. Over the past week the guards at the various hills had gotten used to the sight of him and Alice coming by to peer inside. None of them had possessed the nerve to actually go up to him and ask what he was about. They had simply stood back and watched, most of them preferring to focus on Alice rather than him. People didn’t try to converse with a White Mage if they didn’t absolutely have to.