The Spirit Keeper (25 page)

They were seated in the living room, including a woman I didn’t recognize. She looked vaguely familiar, though, and mildly uncomfortable, like she wasn’t sure what to do with herself. There was a definite tension in the air, and not much talking was going on. I hung back watching them for a few moments, and it was David who finally noticed me. He shot out of his seat, and they all turned to stare.

“What’s going on?” I said with a nervous laugh.

Meg cleared her throat and gestured to the woman I didn’t know. “This is Imogene, Adrian and Shyla’s grandmother. She’s also an old friend of the family.”

“Old is right,” Imogene said, tapping her silver head and seeming to relax a little.

She was a squat woman with a round face and hair cropped so short it looked like a fine layer of snow had settled on top of her head. She got up and took my hand, patting it.

“It’s nice to see you again after all these years. I only wish it could have been under better circumstances. You’ve grown into a very beautiful young lady.”

I smiled at Imogene, momentarily wondering when we could have possibly met before, even as my gaze drifted to Shyla. As soon as our eyes met, she came to stand before me and took a deep breath.

“I owe you an explanation,” she said.

“Sit down,” Imogene said, still holding my hand. “Please.”

She ushered me to the couch, and I reluctantly took a seat next to her. Adrian was on my other side, and I took a small amount of comfort from his presence as he squeezed my other hand. My mouth began to water at the sight of the sandwiches laid out on the coffee table before us, and yet I was too nervous to eat. I noticed no one else was eating, either.  

Shyla was watching me with dark, focused eyes, and I struggled to hold her gaze. Judging by the tension in the room and by the way no one was really talking, I had this horrible feeling that what had happened in my bedroom was just the beginning. I began to tap my foot out of nervous reflex, wishing I could fast-forward through this day.

The warm hand on my knee startled me. “Be still,” Adrian whispered in my ear. I took a deep breath and willed my body to settle.

Shyla’s eyes cut to her grandmother, and Imogene answered the look with a slight inclination of her snowy head. Then Shyla stood, hands fisted at her sides, and cleared her throat.

“I want to apologize for the horrible mistake I made the other day in the woods.” She lowered her eyes, and her fingers clenched and unclenched. “You have to believe I never meant to hurt Sarah.”

After the space of a few heartbeats, she raised her eyes again and looked at everyone in turn, saving me for last.

“I could apologize for the rest of my life, and still that wouldn’t be enough,” she said to me. “I didn’t mean to hurt you. It’s just that, I’ve always had a bit of a short fuse.”

Adrian snorted at this, and Shyla narrowed her eyes at him before continuing.

“What I did to you, it’s something that happened in the heat of the moment. It was a total lapse in judgment,” she said with a self-deprecatory shake of the head. “And if I could turn back time and make it so that it never happened—”

“What’s done is done. Sarah is here with us now because of what you did to bring her back,” Meg said, giving Shyla the forgiveness she was so obviously looking for.  

I crooked my brow in an unspoken question and looked at David, wondering if he could so easily forgive Shyla, but all he did was cross his arms over his chest and sit back in his chair.

“Right,” Shyla said, pushing a strand of hair behind her ear before sitting down. She took a shuddering breath and opened her eyes wide, as through standing on a great abyss.

“As the current Spirit Keeper of our tribe,” she said, “it was within my ability to call on our Spirit Leader and ask for Her help in healing Sarah.”

At the mention of my name, everyone’s head swiveled in my direction. I shrank from their focused gazes, embarrassed by the weight of the sudden attention.

“My tribe might have given up on me a long time ago,” Shyla said softly, shaking her head, “but I have never given up on the Spirit Leader. Nor has Katori given up on me.”

Then she lifted her head high and spoke more loudly. “Katori showed the extent of her mercy and compassion when she answered my prayer.”

“Thanks be to the Spirit and Her Keeper,” Imogene intoned, which prompted an automatic response from everyone else, with the exception of myself. I looked around at them, feeling like an outcast even in my own home. I realized then there was a lot I didn’t know, least of all the customs and rituals that Meg and David had given up, but not entirely forgotten.

Shyla nodded and took another breath. “What I did to Sarah . . . well, I didn’t really know
what
I was doing. I’ve never done anything like that before. I was just so mad. At everything. At every
body
.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Adrian said. “You’ve already admitted to your anger issues. Get on with it.”

Shyla dug her fingers into the arms of the chair but didn’t respond to Adrian.

“I know getting angry doesn’t justify my actions,” she said, “but that’s my only defense. And I truly had no idea that whatever I did would affect you like that.”

Her face took on a horrified expression. “I didn’t realize so much evil was in me.”

She paused to wipe away a stray tear that had begun to work its way down her cheek. “When I finally went home and Adrian told me how sick you were, I wanted to kill myself. Of course, I was pretty sure Adrian was going to take care of that for me.”

She laughed and sniffed loudly, at which point Meg handed her one of the paper napkins so she could dry her eyes and blow her nose.

“I was mortified,” she went on after a moment. “I mean, I’d done some awful things before with my powers when I was younger and not so in control, but never anything like that.”

“Remember the time you set the living room rug on fire?” Adrian said, chuckling under his breath. “Dad had a
major
conniption.”

“Of course I remember,” Shyla snapped. “My butt was sore for days after that.” She sighed then and looked at me. “Setting fires is a talent of mine,” she said, her voice heavy with sarcasm.

“Where did you go?” Meg said, generously changing the direction of the conversation.

“I got in my car and just drove around.” Shyla rolled her eyes and laughed. “I completely blew my gas budget for the month, but I ended up down by the lake. When I got tired, I climbed in the back seat and fell asleep. I knew Gran would be worried about me, so I finally called home and told her where I was and what had happened. She said that Adrian had already told her everything and that we would figure out how to fix it together. I just had to come home.”

Shyla sighed then, her entire body shaking as her breath shuddered out. “I’ve been Spirit Keeper for nearly my whole life, certainly for as long as I can remember. I’ve always been resentful of the power inside me, because nothing good ever seems to come of it.”

Imogene huffed and shifted her weight in the chair. “I hate to say it, but you’re just as stubborn as your father. One of the reasons I took you in to my care was so you could
learn
how to control your powers, but you wouldn’t listen.”

Imogene touched my hand. “I was Spirit Keeper many years ago. I passed the power to my daughter, Aida, because of her strength of character and compassion. Of course, Aida passed the magic on to Shyla.”

“I never wanted these powers!” Shyla said, her voice rising in anger.

“If you didn’t want them,” I said to Shyla, “why didn’t you give them away to someone else?”

“Don’t think I didn’t try,” she said, leveling her gaze at me.

When Imogene saw the confused expression on my face, she touched my hand again. “You can’t
give
the power away to just anyone,” she said. “The power is the embodiment of the Spirit Leader, Katori. It is Herself who ultimately chooses the next Keeper. The person is more or less a guide . . . a human vessel, if you will. And once Katori has made Her choice, she doesn’t surrender Her hold so easily.”

She turned back to Shyla then. “As wrong as some in the tribe thought it was for your mother to breathe that magic into your body, it was meant to be. Katori chose
you
.”

“Lucky me,” Shyla said through gritted teeth.

Shyla then closed her eyes, and it was several moments before she spoke again. “When I went home, I did what Gran said. I prayed for our Spirit Leader’s guidance. I asked how I could heal Sarah, and Her answer came as a Conditional Blessing.”

Meg jerked as though someone had poked her with a hot iron. “A Conditional Blessing?” She closed her eyes and bowed her head, slowly shaking it back and forth.

“What’s a Conditional Blessing?” I said, picking up on her anxiety.

Shyla didn’t answer. Instead, she picked up her glass of water and took a small sip. She eyed me over the rim, and I could feel beads of sweat begin to break out across my forehead. Somehow I didn’t think I really wanted to know the answer to that question.

“There has been only one other person in the history of our tribe to receive a Conditional Blessing,” Imogene said.

“You’re talking about Melody,” David said.

“Yes.” 

“But what
is
a Conditional Blessing,” I said, impatient to understand.

Imogene steepled her fingers, turning her body on the couch to look at me. “In essence, a Conditional Blessing is a free pass. Well, not exactly a free pass. Rather, it’s a blessing that comes with a caveat—a certain cost to the recipient. Melody’s Conditional Blessing was that she could give up her baby and continue to live on the reservation among her own people, mistakes forgiven, or keep her child but be banished from the tribe.”

“That’s so unfair!” I said, outraged on behalf of my dead mother.              

Imogene raised her brow at my vehemence. “You weren’t the only one to think so, Sarah. That Conditional Blessing fractured our tribe. There were many who thought just as you do. They didn’t understand how Katori, who’d always been portrayed as a loving and gentle and very wise woman, could ever cast such a harsh judgment against one of Her children. It was a very confusing time for the people of our tribe.

“Nevertheless,” Imogene went on, “it was a Conditional Blessing issued by the Spirit Leader. Carried out by the Council, it was a binding law. To break it meant to go against the tribe and the word of Katori.”

Her eyes cut to me again, and her voice turned soft. “There was never any doubt which path your mother would choose. Some in the tribe were sad to see her go, but they were also relieved that she took the fear of the unknown with her. As far as they were concerned, they had washed their hands of any lingering danger, and Melody still got what she wanted.”

My mind had been working in overdrive throughout Imogene’s speech. There was still something I needed to know for sure, something that Imogene couldn’t answer.

I looked at Shyla and asked her point-blank, “Did
you
set that fire? I need to know the truth, once and for all. No more keeping secrets.”

Shyla’s entire body shook with the accusation. She bolted out of her chair, nearly upsetting the water glasses on the table. “I told you I didn’t do it,” she said between tight lips. “What will it take to convince you that I’m telling the truth?”

“We had always suspected you were involved,” Meg said quietly, eyeing Shyla with a measured level of wariness. “I’m sorry about that now.” 

“Shyla did take the fall,” Imogene cut in. “Her own father was the first to point the finger of blame, and it didn’t take much to convince people of her guilt, given her history of setting fires. I left the reservation soon after your family did and purposely followed you here, even though you weren’t aware of it at the time. I guess I felt guilty in a way. What happened to my daughter was an accident—it certainly wasn’t Melody’s fault—and I couldn’t stand seeing all of you cut loose from the tribe. And when Shyla got in trouble, I knew I had to step in to protect her. She came here, to live with me, where no one could bother her again.”