The Streets Or Me: A Louisiana Love Story (16 page)

I walk in the room, my heartbreaking at the sight of seeing my son laid up with these machines hooked up to him, helping him stay alive. I stood at his bedside as tears fell from my eyes. I wanted so badly to him in my arms and take away whatever pain he was feeling, but I couldn't.

"Luke, baby it's mama. I hate seeing you like this and there's nothing I can do to comfort you. I know you're gonna make it through this because you're strong and you have so much more life to live. Don't give up sweetheart, Lucas and A’Laya need you. I love you Luke."

I leaned down and kissed his head before leaving the room. I don't know what my son was going through to make him do this, but I pray that God spares my baby's life. I can't lose him like I lost his father.

Nobody knows what I go through.

Wish you could put yourself inside my shoes.

You got friends that ain't friends no more.

They don't understand the life I chose.

See the money and the fame

It can hurt everything you love.

Got some people that depend on me

And I can't give up.

They don't know what I’m going through.

They don't know what I’m going through-August Alsina

I sat out on the patio, smoking a blunt, and staring up at the sky. I couldn't believe this shit was happening. First I get word that niggas coming for us, then this shit happens. All I can think about now is "what's next?" I’ll be lying if I said this shit wasn't affecting a nigga 'cause it is. Luke is more than just a best friend, that's my brother. Seeing as I grew up an only child, him and Chino is the closest things to siblings that I’ll ever get.

Speaking of Chi, I can only imagine how my nigga taking this shit. I mean that's his blood, they maybe cousins by birth, but they’re really brothers by heart. Damn, I know Ms. Kelley hurting like hell behind this shit. Luke he is her everything bruh, even though she got her other kids, that nigga is her world. I can't even begin to understand how his sisters and brother feel, 'specially his twin, Lucy. That girl loves her twin brother like crazy.

I been tryna put on a strong facade for Khy’s sake, but a nigga hurting. I ran my hand across my waves as I hit the blunt, letting the kush invade my lungs. I swear sometimes I wish none of us ever got caught up in these street life. This shit ain't did a damn thing, but bring us unnecessary and unwanted drama. Seem like every time we try to get out, this shit pulls us right back in.

I put the blunt to my lips again as the patio door slid open. She leaned against it dressed in one of my t-shirts and some ankle socks. I put the rest of the blunt out, beckoning for her to come sit with me. She smiled softly as she sat down.

"How you holding up?"

"I should be asking you that, he yo cousin."

"I’m ok, I guess. I know he's strong and he'll come out of it stronger than before."

I nodded at her statement in understanding. We all basically want the same thing and that's for him to be good. I felt her wrap her arms around my torso as she rests her head on my shoulder.

"It's ok to tell me how you feeling, Legacy. You don't have to be tough all the time."

"I don't even know where to start explaining how I feel. Shit just crazy to me, ya know. Like how all this shit even happen? What the fuck was he dealing with that made him take all them damn drugs?"

"None of us know what he was dealing with, but whatever it was had to hurt him bad if he took all that shit. You know Court told me there was all kinds of drugs on his nightstand when she got there. I'm talking powder, percs, xanz, lean, dip, and a lot more shit."

"You think he did this on purpose, Khy?"

"I’m not saying that, but I know my cousin and he wouldn't just do some shit like this if he wasn't really bothered by something."

Damn she right about that. Luke was never the type to do some shit like this, no matter what he was dealing with. Thing is we don't know what was bothering him 'cause none of us had seen or spoke to him in weeks. I wrapped my arm around Khy, kissing her head as a tear fell from my eye. I just hope he know that we praying for his recovery, and also that no more drama or tragedies occur.

I sat outside on Ms. Mason’s porch so that I could get some fresh air. I was still having trouble wrapping my mind around the entire situation at hand. When I walked in that room, seeing Luke laid out on that floor with blood flowing from his head, made my heart stop for a moment. It's been ten years since he and I broke up, and he got with Miracle, but I never stopped loving or caring for him. I just couldn't be with him while he led this dangerous street life.

I gave Luke an ultimatum all those years ago, to either leave the street life or I was leaving him. Quite naturally he chose the streets, well I didn't give him much of a choice because I just up and walked away. I stared at the last text that he sent me and my heart just broke even more. Each word was like a painful reminder of just how hard life can be.

Luke: Courtnei, by the time you receive this text, the damage will already be done. I never knew just how hard life could be until two of the most important women in the world walked away from me. I know I never said it and this apology is ten years overdue, but I’m sorry for the pain that I caused you with the life I lived. All you ever wanted was for me to the man that you deserved, instead I chose to stay with the street life. It was my fault that you walked away, now it's my fault that Miracle walked away and is in the position she's in. It seems like no matter how much good I try to do or how I try to change, something always pulls me back. I just wanna be a better father for Lucas and A’Laya, but I can't seem to do that without my past trying to interfere. I'm tired of stressing having to watch my back with every step I take 'cause niggas tryna take me down. I need you to take care of Lucas and A'Laya for me. I got over half a million dollars saved up from being in the streets, it's yours. I just need you to make sure my mom, Miracle, and the kids are straight no matter what. Whether you believe it or not, Courtnei, I loved you with everything I had in me and I still love you. I never meant to 'cause you no pain at all. Kiss my kids every day for me, I love…

I hugged myself as more tears fell from my eyes. If only I had received the text earlier then Luke wouldn't be fighting for his life right now.

It was about 8:30pm when my girl Shay invited me to this kickback she was having at Motel6. I ain't have shit else to do so I said why not, plus I heard it was gon' be some real ballers here. Once I get to the hotel, I park around back like she said. I got out the car and head to the room number she gave me. I knock on the door, waiting for her to answer.

"Kiki, what’s boo! Glad you could make it!"

"You know I can't turn down a party. I'm always down for the turn up."

"Well I hope you can handle this turn up tonight. Come on in."

She moved to the side and walked in the room. It was only about two girls including myself and the rest was guys. I'm talking real street niggas in this bitch. I was nervous, but not really afraid because I grew up around guys like this; I quickly pulled Shay to the side to see what the fuck is up 'cause she been on that funny shit sometimes.

"Yo Shay, what the fuck is this? I thought you said it was gon' be a lot of people as in male and female. What the fuck yo!"

"First of all watch ya fucking hands, we may be cool, but don't grab on me like I’m some kinda fuck girl. Second of all, chill the fuck out. I just text my girls and they on the way, you act like these niggas tryna fuck you or some shit, damn!"

"Look all I’m saying is-"

"And all I’m saying is shut the fuck up and cool out. I invited you here for some fun not this lil bullshit, scared ass game you playing. Act like you never been in a room full of niggas before, must I bring up the Dallas trip last month."

"Whatever. What you got to sip in here?"

"Exactly what I thought. Drink this and hit this blunt, it'll calm yo wanna be stuck up ass down."

I took the cup and blunt, rolling my eyes at her as I sat on the bed. Shay is my girl and all, but she be tripping on some shit for real for real. After a few sips from the cup and smoking a whole loud blunt to myself, I started to loosen up and feel good. One of the guys had turned on some music for us to turn up to. I don't know what came over me, but I was so turnt up that I ain't realize Shay and her friend had left me in the room. I figured they just went to one of the convenient stores across the way so I wasn't tripping. I continued to drink, smoke, and turn the fuck up. I was loaded, but I quickly sobered up when someone kicked in the front door and held us all at gunpoint. What the fuck did I walk into?

"Khy stop acting like this ma. I just gotta go handle this business real fast. I won't be gone no longer than two hours."

Shit was starting to get heavy in these streets. Just 24hrs after Luke was admitted to MICU, two of my west side traps got hit. Over a hundred grand in cash and drugs came up missing from our shit. I could let Marco handle shit, but I know it was them Atlanta niggas that hit so this shit is personal and I gotta handle it on my own. I still ain't told Khy none of this shit 'cause she already got enough on her plate with the shower coming up and Luke being in the hospital, then she studying for midterms. She doesn't need no extra stress on her or the babies.

"Let Marco or Dyme handle whatever fucking business you got, Legacy! I need you here with me please."

"Khy this is business; I need to handle on my own ma. I know you need-"

"If you know I need you then stay or at least tell me why you're being so secretive."

"Khyia, baby I swear I will explain everything to you soon, but right now I gotta go. Make sure you set this alarm and if you need anything, Vinny gon' be right downstairs."

"Legacy, wai-"

"I love you baby girl; I promise I’ll be back soon."

I grabbed my keys, heading downstairs just as my phone rang.

"Yo, I’m coming out now, had to make sure baby girl straight."

"Aight bruh, hurry up."

I ended the call, walking down the last few steps. Vinny was sitting on the sofa scrolling through his phone.

"Yo V, I'm out bruh. Make sure she good while I’m gone. I shouldn't be no more than a few hours."

"I gotcha man...go handle ya business."

I dapped him then headed out the door, hopping in Marco’s all black suburban. He hands me a freshly rolled kush blunt as he pulls away from the curb.

"You ready to do this shit bruh?"

I inhaled the smoke letting it invade my lungs as I nodded going into my zone. This the type of shit I live for on a daily. Muhfuckas wanna play games and make threats, I just hope they ready for war. I gotta protect what's mine by any means necessary, even if it means killing every bitch or nigga that cross my path. We pulled up at the hotel and parked 'round back.

Lexi and Shay got that bitch Kiari down here under false pretenses. All we had to do was wait for them to leave the room, then we move in. I took a long drag off the blunt, then passed it to Marco as he nodded his head along to August Alsina’s Grindin’. I was in a whole other zone when I felt my phone vibrate in my pocket. I figured it was Khy so I just let it go to voicemail. Few minutes, later I see Lexi and Shay get in their cars and drive away. I load my clip then turn to Marco.

"You ready?"

"In and out like always."

"No evidence, no witnesses."

"Let's go."

I pull the mask over my face as we hop out the car. We slowly creep to the door; you could hear Kevin Gates blasting through the door. I make sure nobody was insight then I kick in the door as they all turn around shocked and confused. I saw the fear gleam in Kiari’s eyes as I smirked, aiming the gun.

"Tell Trey and Lux, Legacy said wassup bitch."

"Ple-"

Pop! Pop! Pop!

Those were the last sounds heard before we hopped back in the ride and pulled off. We had one more stop to make before I head back to the crib.