The Tao of Pam (7 page)

The pace in Pam’s house was picking up exponentially as more family arrived for the long weekend. The day of the party was still two days away, but her sisters were coming for the entire time, as were the elders, Bernice and Nelda.

Pam sent a car to pick them up at their posh retirement center. The nurse in charge that day was having a difficult time getting the women to understand they were only going to be gone for three days, and it wasn’t necessary to take all of their clothing and belongings. “Just pack for a nice summer weekend,” she continually reminded them. “You can take your jewelry boxes if you want, but it might be easier to lock them in your room safe.”

Bernice turned to the young woman and, with her nose in the air, smirked. “What absolute good would it be to keep our jewelry locked up in a safe to which the entire nursing staff has the combination?” She turned to Nelda. “I guess they think we’re daft.”

Nelda laughed, but she looked at the nurse with compassion. “It’s no problem for us to take the boxes to my daughter’s house, but thank you for the reminder.”

The nurse shrugged her shoulders and left the room.

“Imagine, that idiot thinking we’d leave all of our jewels behind for the likes of her to pilfer,” Bernice said. Her jewelry box was full of junk and costume jewelry; Pam took anything of value home for safekeeping.

Nelda patted her hair, checking her make up again. Their personal helper, Annabelle, had a pierced nose ring and purple hair, but she managed to get Nelda’s makeup down perfectly. “I think I look better today than I have all year,” she said.

“What are we going to do tomorrow?” Bernice said, worried. “We’ll have to do it ourselves.”

“Let’s be careful of our hair. We can get away without washing it for a weekend, can’t we?”

“Well, if we don’t move, maybe. But what about our makeup?” Bernice said.

“Pam will help us,” Nelda said smugly. “She’s always been real good at helping me. I can’t wait to get there. Lisa will have the baby, and hopefully Brent will come.”

“I wish she’d invite Bill’s family,” Bernice said, referring to her son Bill, Jack’s younger brother. He was in jail for five years for kidnapping Sandra.
Or so she said
. “Poor Ann and those little boys. I haven’t seen them in over a year.”

Nelda didn’t reply; Ann was furious with Bill’s family for “abandoning her and the boys.”
The less said the better,
Nelda thought.

“So, how do I look?” Nelda bravely asked Bernice. “This dress is a favorite from when Frank was alive.”

Bernice looked her up and down, frowning. “You should have buried it with him,” she said. “It’s not only out of style, it’s made of rayon. No one wears rayon anymore, especially in the summer. You’ll wrinkle up like a prune if it’s hot at the beach.”

“Thank you, Bernice,” Nelda replied. “Ask a stupid question and you might get a stupid answer.”

Bernice turned around in her chair. “Don’t tell me you’re offended now,” she said, exasperated. “I only speak the truth.”

Nelda turned from side to side in the mirror. “Maybe you’re right,” she said, defeated. She walked to the closet and dug out an old culotte dress made of polyester, with a zip-up front. “What about this?” She held it up for Bernice to see.

“Oh, my God. That thing should’ve been thrown out in the seventies. What will you do if you have to pee?”

Nelda went back to the closet, at a loss. “What do I usually wear?” she asked. “Suddenly, I’m a prisoner of the housedress genre. It’s from living in this place all the time. We don’t even really need to get dressed if we don’t want to.”

Bernice stood up carefully. “Stop it. You always look nice with your neat pants and blouses. Why are you trying to change your look for a picnic? Just wear what you always do. There’s nothing wrong with housedresses, either. With your heels and stockings, you know just how to dress up!” Trying for the nice Bernice, the friendly Bernice, she could see her negative comments were beating down Nelda, and that wasn’t her goal. She needed her friend to stay positive so that when Bernice needed encouragement, it would be forthcoming. No telling how awful it would be if they were both rock bottom at the same time, which had almost happened once.

Nelda’s daughter Marie had died and left behind baby Miranda to be cared for by Nelda and the baby’s father, Steve. But Nelda had a fall and was hospitalized, and Steve fled, leaving the baby with Sandra. Shortly after he took off, he was killed in a car wreck, and that day was the closest Bernice and Nelda had ever had in which they were both despondent at the same time. It took weeks before either one felt better.

Now, even the hardcore Bernice knew that she would be lost without Nelda’s companionship. And although she sometimes slipped into her haughty matron role, she knew it couldn’t last long, that she must snap out of it for Nelda’s sake.

The nurse reappeared. “Your driver’s here,” she said. “Can I start taking your bags out?”

Nelda changed into a brown shirtwaist dress with pumps and jewelry to compliment. Bernice gave her the thumbs-up as she walked into the sitting room.

“He should get in here and carry the bags himself,” Nelda said, testy. “I’m sure my daughter is paying a fortune for this ride.”

The nurse ignored her and started dragging bags out to the hallway.

“Okay, Bernie, ready or not,” Nelda said.

Bernice took one last look around the room. “I guess I’m as ready as I’ll ever be. This is definitely going to be different than it has been in the past. It will be the first picnic I’ve been to since Jack died.”

Nelda had a smart comment for her, but bit her tongue. They’d both recently lost children tragically. There was no point in being cruel about it, although she’d change her mind when the next comment slipped out of Bernice’s mouth.

“Of course, you wouldn’t know what I was talking about.”

“What does that mean?” Nelda spat out. “I guess Marie dying doesn’t count.”

Bernice backpedaled, having completely forgotten about Nelda’s own loss. “Of course it matters. It’s tragic. What I meant was the picnic and all. Marie didn’t have much to do with the picnic.”

Nelda let her yammer on without responding. Her mouth didn’t stop as they walked down the hall to the reception area and out to the limousine.

“Now there are two ungrateful old ladies,” the nurse said. “It will be peaceful around here for three whole days.”

“We’ll see,” her colleague said. “Have they ever lasted more than a night away?”

“No, I guess not. What do you think it’ll be this time?”

“Who knows? Let’s just enjoy their absence while we can.” They nodded their heads in agreement as the limousine pulled away from the curb, Nelda and Bernice bickering at each other clearly visible behind the tinted windows.

Pam had broken her resolve not to cook three meals a day for all of these people, because tonight was special. In the coming days, it would be catered or take out. Her sisters were already planning to contribute breakfast the next day. She looked at her watch, having expected Ed to be back from the store more than an hour before. The meatballs baked, and the sauce was heating up, the water to cook the spaghetti almost boiling. She wanted everything ready the minute her mother and mother-in-law arrived.

“What could be taking Ed so long?” Gladys Ford asked. She looked over at Lisa, who was holding the baby, looking out over the water. “Can you call his cell phone?”

“I’m sure he’ll be home any minute,” she replied. “I don’t like calling him when he’s driving.”

“Can I do anything to help?” Gladys asked Pam. She’d already set the table.

“Do you want to go up to the kid’s wing and make sure everything is ready for the ladies? They should be pulling up any second.” Bernice and Nelda would use Marie’s old room. If Brent didn’t show up, they’d use that bed, too. But as it stood, the house was full. Her sisters and their families were sharing the mother-in-law apartment above the garage, flowing into the upstairs guest rooms also used by Gladys and Ed. Lisa and Ed and the baby would be in her old room. Anyone else needing accommodations could stay at a bed and breakfast down the beach from the house. It was beginning to feel a little like the old days to Pam, and she was sure having the elders there would perk everything up. She reached for the pasta to place in the hot water when the house phone rang.

“Mrs. Smith?” It was a shaken Ed.

“Yes, are you all right?” She heard a sob.

“Is Dan there?”

“Not yet, but I’m expecting him any second. What’s wrong?”

“I need to talk to him right away,” Ed said, urgency in his voice clear. “But I don’t want you to say anything to Lisa or my mother, please.”

“Okay, you have my word. Does he have your cell phone number?”

“No!” Ed shouted. “He needs to get to the police station as fast as he can. Tell him to get down here.”

She heard murmuring in the background. And then the phone went dead. She looked at it, and glanced out into the house. No one was paying attention to her, so she went into her bedroom to make the call. She dialed Dan’s number, and he answered right away.

“What now?” he asked when she explained the problem. “Okay, I’ll head over. Best not wait dinner for us, though. If he needs a lawyer, it may take a while.”

They said goodbye and Pam went out into the kitchen. She was going to lie. Lisa was talking to her aunts, showing the baby off, and Gladys was chatting with Big Ed when the doorbell rang; it was Nelda and Bernice. With the commotion of their arrival and the fuss made over the baby, no one mentioned Ed again until they were seated to eat.

“Where’s Ed and Dan?” Lisa said, frowning. “Did you hear anything from Dan, Mother?”

Pam was passing a bowl of salad to Nelda. “They met in town and got busy doing something together,” she said vaguely. “They should be home any second.”

Pam was getting concerned with the ticking of the clock, but no one mentioned them again. Getting everyone settled in their rooms, doling out glasses of wine on the veranda once all the children were in bed, Pam was finally alone in the kitchen. She’d found her stride sometime before dinner, the place that brought so much satisfaction in the past. And although she couldn’t say for certain that it was a nice feeling to have, she was relaxed and happy working in her kitchen like she used to. She definitely missed Marie and Jack, though. And Brent, who hadn’t called her yet. Hopefully, he’d be there sometime that weekend. Her thoughts were disturbed by the ringing of the phone. She saw Dan’s cell phone number.

“What is going on?” she asked, going into the pantry and closing the door behind her.

“He should be released any second,” Dan said. “He’s being booked for indecent exposure, but they’ll release him into my custody.”

“Indecent exposure? I am sorry, but I don’t see Ed exposing himself to anyone,” Pam hissed into the phone.

“Well, you’ll just have to trust me. The arrest was made, and it’s a matter of public record now.”

Pam was speechless—this on the heels of Lisa’s confession of Ed being reluctant in bed.
Did mankind just recently lose their collective minds? Why in god’s name would a newlywed man choose exposing himself over making love to his wife?

“Are you still there?” Dan asked.

“When are you coming home?” she said shortly. “And what should I say to his wife?”

“Like I said, I’m afraid it is going to be reported publically, so let him explain it to her. You should take cover in your room. I’m going to suggest that he pack his family up tonight and go home. We don’t want intrigue around all those people.”

“Whatever you think. I am still in shock,” she said.

She went back to the guests that were still up. By ten, she heard Dan’s key in the door. Lisa was back in her room, nursing the baby, doing a good job of hiding her anger at her husband after disappearing for six hours. Pam stood in the hallway and looked at Ed with as blank an expression as she could muster. She’d learn later that her car had been impounded. Dan would take care of it the following Tuesday.

“You better go deal with your wife,” Dan told him.

Ed looked horrible, pale and haggard, clearly mortified and regretful. He walked through the kitchen to the children’s wing, gently knocking on the door.

She said, “Come in,” thinking it was her mother.

“Ed! Where in hell have you been?” She stood up with a sleeping baby at her breast and went to him. “You look awful. What happened? What was so pressing that you had to go with Dan, abandoning us for the entire afternoon?”

“Look, I’ll explain when we get home. We can’t stay tonight with all of these people here. I’ll get the diaper bag, and let’s go.”

Lisa wasn’t going that easily, though. “No, I don’t want to leave, Ed. You can tell me here. Now I’m getting frightened.”

He made eye contact with her. “Trust me, Lisa, you will not want to deal with this here, in your mother’s house with your relatives in the next room. You have to trust me one more time.”

Lisa grabbed her purse and took a cursory look around the room. There was nothing there that she didn’t have duplicates of at home. Ed left the room with the diaper bag, and they made a beeline for the mudroom, avoiding having to stop and chat with his parents, who were still awake, drinking wine with Pam’s sisters and their husbands on the veranda. They could hear laughter and see the flickering light from the gas fire pit as they dodged through the room.

Pam locked the door behind them, wishing she could advise her daughter in some way. Evidently, Lisa wasn’t going to be able to stick her head into the sand. She would be forced to deal with her husband’s failures and fragilities.

They buckled Megan into her car seat without trouble, slamming their doors and buckling their own seatbelts. Lisa was aware that Ed’s hands were shaking, his mouth was shaking, his legs were shaking. It was happening with enough force that the car was shaking. She looked at him, wanting to lash out, but not knowing anything except he’d failed to come home and to keep her informed. Not wanting to upset him further, she held her comments. Whatever happened would soon be revealed, and she could wait until they got home.