The Torn, Book One of the Holding Kate Series (7 page)

Phsshh! Ridiculous!

Yet, a strange sensation crept over me as I became reoriented. The friends had various expressions of humor, surprise, congratulations, and—betrayal.

My mouth popped open and I huffed a little breath of shock! Staring into dark brown eyes, everything came flooding back to me in a slap of shame.

Trip!

I turned from
Trip’s shocked and hurt expression to Corey’s still half-lidded, blissful contentedness. His face spoke volumes and the corner of my mouth lifted at the memory of the love and bliss we shared in the Scriptorium. Warmth spread through me, and I felt myself drift back into his sphere, eyes locked on his lips, mere inches away.

Then I snapped back to the present situation. This was bad! I disentangled myself from Corey’s arms and legs and tried to stand up only to be jerked back down against Corey’s body. It was as though we were tethered together in some unbreakable…oh. Yeah. Our belts were still looped together. My face flushed in embarrassment and Corey quickly unbuckled his belt.

Movement out of the corner of my eye turned my head. Trip’s face was red and his brows were drawn together, he had stepped forward menacingly, glaring at Corey. His face was livid as he took in Corey’s actions at his belt and my body plastered against him. Standing beside him was a tall warrior goddess…what was her name? Oh yes! Tara placed a restraining hand on his shoulder. Her face was concerned and sympathetic as she looked at him, but when she turned her attention on me, anger and disgust flared in her eyes. Trip responded to her touch and stepped back beside her.

Hmmm…that really bothered me. I started to remember why it should bother me. Trip was my protector and friend, we were a…a...what? Not a couple, what exactly were we? Why were they so chummy all of a sudden?

Then I felt Corey’s hand on my back as he pulled his belt out of mine and I realized I didn’t have any reason to be upset. What was going on? What had happened to us in the Scriptorium? Just the fleeting memory sent warm feelings through me, and I involuntarily turned to smile at Corey.
Wait! No. What is wrong with me?

I scrambled up off the floor with Corey’s help and took a tentative step toward Trip, my eyes locked on his. Suddenly, I was unsure of where I stood with my protector. His face lightened at my choice and his eyebrows shot up in vulnerable appeal. His fingers twitched and he lifted a palm toward me. I closed the distance in a second and he enfolded me into his embrace.

Safe. Warm. Home. I sighed and felt him kiss the top of my head. I pressed into his strength and was suddenly aware of changes in his body. He was enormous. His chest was bulging with muscle. He wore a peculiar gladiator costume with a shield strapped to his chest, an empty scabbard hanging from his hip and a bizarre skirt made of leather straps. A strange head piece and two swords were on the floor, as though he had tossed them there. His legs were bare and deeply tanned, muscular as though chiseled from stone. His arms were encircled with leather straps and were massive and laced with scars and cuts. I ran my hand down his ripped biceps and my mouth fell open. I turned wondering eyes up to his.

He drank in my expression with pleasure and a corner of his mouth lifted in a satisfied smirk. He chuckled at my dismay and gathered me back into his arms. I suddenly felt very small.

I looked around at the other team members and noted several things. Pinky’s hair had grown out to shoulder length. She wasn’t even wearing her jumpsuit. She had on a long white linen gown. She stood beside…
oh…what was his name
…Kail who was in white linen pants and a long shirt. Caitlyn was still holding hands with Navarro, but they were both soaking wet. Her hair hung in stringy clumps, and there was a puddle at their feet. Ash and another kid—I think his name was Jose—were caked in dried mud. Chunky Joey was thin and almost emaciated in appearance. He stood beside Andrew who had been thin before, but now seemed to be shriveled in on himself.

“Well, now that we are all back, we should get to the cabin and rest” Mel said. We all picked up our backpacks and pulled them on and filed toward the stairs.

I turned questioning eyes to Pinky, and then craned my neck up to Trip. “Did everyone already go into the Scriptorium?”

“Yeah, we all left within minutes of you and…” His voice broke. “We all got back about the same time. We’ve been waiting for you and C…hem.” He didn’t seem to be able to say Corey’s name. I ducked my eyes, ashamed of the pain I put him through.

We began to ascend the stone steps. I realized I had no sense of day or night in the—ahhh…warm fuzzy flush—Scriptorium. My face blistered at the intensity of the emotions that assaulted me every time I thought of flying, kissing, floating, kissing, bliss, kissing.
Gah
! I bit my cheek to bring my mind back to the present.

“Who was your partner?” I asked mostly to get my mind off of sweet kisses and warm arms…urgh! This was going to be difficult.

“Tara and I were chosen to go together.”

A flash of irritation jolted through me. I frowned, glad it was too dark for him to see me. “Uh huh.” I said noncommittally.

“We ended up in some kind of gladiator stadium and trained for three years in all manner of warfare, martial arts, swords, flails, weapons I had never even heard of. It was awesome.”

“Three years? You were with Tara for three years?” My voice raised several octaves.

He hugged me to him. “Yes. How long were you in the Scriptorium?”

Flutters danced in my belly and warmth spread across my skin, Corey’s smiling face and warm lips.
Mmmm…whoa, come back, girl.
I shook my head. “I don’t know…it seemed only moments,” definitely not enough time to tire of Corey’s sweet kisses, “but it seemed eternal too. We were together for a thousand years. There was no night or day, no meals, as though time meant nothing.”

“Strange. We were very aware of the nights and days. We took a beating for most of them.”

“So you fought the whole time?”

“Trained, fought, ate, slept.”

“Kicked butt,” Tara interjected behind us.

Trip chortled. “You know it!”

We reached the top of the stairs and the line slowed as people loaded into their boats. The light of the moon illuminated our faces as we waited on the steps. I was on the step ahead of Trip so we stood eye to eye.

“I missed you, Katie girl.” He leaned forward and pecked my lips. “I thought only of getting back to protect you.” His eyes crinkled in the corners and a vein pulsed in his forehead. “I didn’t know if you were dead or alive. I thought maybe life moved forward for you and you had already left the village. Heck, I didn’t know if you were an old granny, the way time shifts in this place.”

I touched the vein in his forehead then ran my fingers through his hair. “You cut your hair.” I whispered. He closed his eyes as though relishing my touch and ran his hands down my back and pressed me tightly against his body.

I shuddered with a pleasant longing and wrapped my arms around his neck and hugged him tightly. Over his shoulder, I looked at Tara’s attire. She was scantily clad in a Roman goddess outfit that seemed designed to show more than it covered. Her skin had a golden glitter all over it. My eyes quickly took in her gorgeous appearance, and when I reached her face, I gasped. Tara glared daggers at me. It disturbed me. I did not want that Amazonian-warrior-goddess as an enemy. Her bare arms flexed and I noticed she had buffed up too.

“Tara?” My voice was small and wavered in fear.

She shifted her face into a mask of indifference as Trip turned around. “Have you two met officially?”

“Not really.” Tara’s tone made it clear that was not a problem for her.

“We spoke a bit when I went to get you out of the cabin, so we could come to the lake.” I reminded her.

“Yeah. True.”

“Well, I want my two girls to get to know each other. With Tara on our team, we will be unstoppable.” Trip wrapped his arm around her shoulders and she beamed at him. “Kate, you should see her wield a sword, deadly, beautiful.”

“Heheh.” I laughed nervously and turned my face as my brow crumpled in concern. Great! Not only strong and beautiful, but deadly with a sword! And evidently she hated me! And what did Trip mean by ‘my two girls?’ I didn’t think I liked it, but touché, right? My shoulders slumped a bit at the mess this little trip into the center of the lake had brought us.

I faced forward on the steps as Trip and Tara exchanged compliments about their weapon wielding expertise and looked up toward the opening where the moonbeams highlighted shapes and figures.

Corey had just emerged from the trap door and turned to look down at me. His face was stoic, serious, and full of questions that I had no answers for. He held the door open as Pinky climbed out, and then I followed her. Our eyes locked and the same warmth spread over me. His face softened as though he felt it too. He took my hand to help me out and it lingered in mine for a split second longer than it needed to. My heart yawned wide at his touch and the feeling of pure love engulfed me again.

Trip and Tara came out behind me and we moved toward the edge of the gazebo to see what boats were left. Corey reached for a bass boat and held the line as I stepped into it, then he got in and turned to help others. Tara followed me and sat on the opposite side, as far as she could get and still be in the same boat. Pinky was suspended between Corey and Trip with one foot in the boat when the screeching began.

She screamed and jumped into the water, ricocheting the boat away from the gazebo. Our boat rammed into Ash’s canoe, and I reached out a hand to steady him. Trip saw the sphere descending on us and launched himself off of the gazebo at the boat. The sphere sucked him in and engulfed the five of us. We jumped.

Cool gray mist
surrounded me.

“We jumped,” I said and the muted words fell at my feet. I realized I was holding someone’s hand and looked down. It wasn’t Trip’s strong bulging arm or Corey’s warm smooth skin. It was a black arm, well-toned and caked in dried mud.

“Ash?”

“Yeah, right here.” He squeezed my hand. His voice was close.

I peered through the thick billowing mist and his dark face floated into my view.

“Kate?” Trip’s voice came from behind me.

“Trip, I’m here.”

“I’m here too.” Corey’s voice spoke in my ear and I felt his warm breath on my face. My heart soared at his nearness. I leaned my head into his and groped for his hand. He clasped it and squeezed.

“Did Tara and Pinky jump too?”

“I’m here.” Tara’s voice sounded from a good distance away.

“I don’t think Pinky came through. She dived into the water out of the way,” Trip answered and his voice was right behind me. I felt his arms encircle my waist. Corey tried to drop my hand, but I grasped it harder, refusing to relinquish it. I didn’t want to lose anyone in this mist. He readjusted his grip and squeezed again to reassure me.

“Tara? Walk toward the sound of my voice. We shouldn’t be separated.”

“I’m right here, Kate.” Her voice was right in front of me now, but I still couldn’t see her face.

“We need to find shelter and set up a base camp.” Trip shifted into leader mode.

“Yes,” Tara agreed.

“Wait a minute,” Ash spoke up. “Mel said Corey and Kate were the leaders.”

I felt Trip stiffen and shift toward Ash’s voice.

“It’s fine. No one questions Trip’s alpha role,” Corey stated with a twinge of resignation in his voice that bothered me. I don’t know why, what he said was true enough. If we wanted to survive, Trip was the man to lead us. I think it was just the fact that my sweet Corey had lost his bliss. I couldn’t stand the thought. It sent a pang through my heart. I squeezed his hand and laced my fingers through his.

Trip’s body relaxed a bit, and he tightened his arm around my waist.
Good grief! What a freakin’ mess.

The mist billowed greenish gray fingers in a buffeted spiral, then began to dissipate. I could see Tara’s face darken as her eyes traveled down my body to see Trip’s arms around my waist, protectively, then they traveled down my arms first right, then left to see me holding hands with Corey and Ash. Her eyes darted to mine and burned with distaste. Her nostrils flared and she crossed her arms over her chest. I dropped Ash’s hand first and then reluctantly released Corey’s, glancing at him desperately hating the vacuum between us. Trip stepped forward between me and Corey, severing the connection completely.

“It looks like this fog is starting to clear. We should be able to move soon.” Trip scanned the mist tinged landscape. Dark tree limbs appeared to be floating in the mist half way up a steep incline. A cylinder of white pierced the mist and shards of light beamed down through the smoky haze in pillars of luminescence. It was eerie, yet breathtaking.

“Let’s head up the hill. I’ll lead. Tara, you bring up the rear. If you see anything we can make into a weapon, pick it up.” Trip set off toward the incline pulling me along behind him.

“I wish we hadn’t left our swords in the Scriptorium,” Tara mumbled. “I feel naked without it.”

Ash chuckled. “Oh, that’s why you feel naked?”

I glanced back to see her—in her thong and gladiator shield bra—glare at him, and he coughed awkwardly. I caught Corey’s eye and he winked at me with a big grin on his face. My face flushed warmth and I smiled back. Ash was scurrying along behind him biting his lip and Tara frowned at his back.

An enormous shadow passed over us. Trip froze and scanned the misty sky above us.

“That was too big for a bird,” Corey murmured behind me and stepped forward until we were shoulder to shoulder.

We became very still listening and scanning. The only sound was my pounding heart. Fear sliced through me with every thudump.

Tara and Ash stepped up and we all put our heads together. “We should split up,” Tara said. “We will be more likely to find food, shelter, weapons, water.”

“We could get lost in all this fog!” I disagreed. “We need to wait until we know more about this place.”

“Tara is right. We could be here a long time. The sooner we get settled, the better,” Ash interjected.

Corey shook his head. “I don’t know, guys. It just doesn’t seem right to separate. We were all chosen to be here for a reason. All we know for sure is that this is an exercise in cooperation. Splitting up doesn’t seem to fit.”

We all looked to Trip. His would be the deciding vote.

“I agree with Tara.” He cut worried eyes to me. “The sooner we can defend ourselves, the better our chances of survival.”

I looked down at my arms, frustrated that they could only think of physical survival. There was more at stake here, but only Corey and I seemed to understand that, and we were outnumbered.

“Fine,” I snapped. “Corey and I will climb the hill and see if we can get above the fog bank. We need to know what we are up against.”

Trip started to shake his head.

“She’s right, Trip,” Tara agreed, a little too quickly, I thought. “Ash and I will skirt the incline this way.” She pointed over her shoulder. “You go that way and we will meet on the other side of the hill, then we can pick our way back here and climb to meet Kate and Corey.”

Trip gazed into my eyes for a long moment with a frown on his face. I was too upset with him to give him any reassurances. I turned, took Corey by the hand and started climbing the hill.

“Kate, wait a minute.”

“We are gonna get started.” Tara took Ash by the shoulder, and they started off.

I stopped and looked up at Corey. Trip walked up behind me and turned me around to face him. Then he looked at Corey and shuffled his feet, awkwardly.

“I’ll wait for you up here,” Corey mumbled, dropped my hand and climbed up the hill until the mist took him from view.

“Kate.”

I refused to look up at Trip. I pressed my lips together and stared at his boots.

He touched my chin and turned my face up to his. I glared at him.

“Don’t be mad, Kate.” His voice was velvet and pleading. “I have to make decisions that are best for all of us. It wasn’t about choosing Tara over you.”

My mouth fell open. “Is that what you think I am upset about?”

“Isn’t it?”

“Of all the arrogant—I don’t give a flippin’ flea circus if you choose Tara!” I pushed at his chest, futilely. “You can choose her all day long. Go ahead. Choose her! I don’t care if you decide Ash is more your type! This is the wrong decision, and you are just too…too…I don’t know…
physical
to see that!” I punched his bicep with my finger. “You listen to me Trip Carson! This will end badly unless you start thinking about the reason we are all here. It isn’t about surviving. It’s about…about… healing. You heard the stories. We are all broken, messed up kids, and we aren’t here to earn a campfire badge!”

It was the most I had ever said at one time in my life, I think. I wasn’t a speech maker or preachy type, but
this
I was sure about.

Trip started grinning and I wanted to smack him.

“Physical, huh?” He flexed his bicep. “I have a feeling you like it that I am physical.”

I stared him down. He dropped his silly grin.

“Okay, Kate. I hear you. I will consider what you are saying.” He touched my cheek. “Please don’t be mad at me. I can’t stand the thought of you walking away from me angry. I just got you back. I don’t want to spend another minute without you.” His dark eyes bored into mine pleading.

“Well then, I guess it is too bad you split us all up.” I gave him a half smile.

“I wasn’t planning on you leaving my side. That was your idea.” He stepped closer and placed his hand on my waist.

I wasn’t ready to just let him off the hook. I was still pretty mad at him, but I didn’t want him to worry. “Well, go get your physical stuff done and hurry back.”

“Kiss and make up?” He pulled me close.

There was so much of him, like he had his own gravity. I tried to resist his pull. “No, but I will give you a hug. That will give you something to look forward to when you get back.” I wrapped my arms around his neck. He lifted me off the ground and smothered me with his bear hug.

“I won’t be long, Katie girl.” He twirled me around, set me down and jogged off.

I held out my arms until my head stopped spinning and, then turned to climb the hill. The mist was clearing and I spotted Corey sitting on a rock.

“Well, did you set him right?” He looked up at me.

“I think so.”

“Hey, Kate,” Corey’s face shifted from pain to embarrassment and sincerity. “I am really not interested in becoming your ticket to making Trip jealous.”

My heart deflated, I didn’t want to do this to my Corey. I didn’t know how to sustain Corey’s bliss and be with Trip, too. I sat down beside him. “I am sorry, Corey. I didn’t really plan to use you to make Trip jealous, but I can see why you would think that.”

We reached for each other’s hands; it was just natural to be touching. We had embraced for a thousand years. “I was just frustrated that they couldn’t see our point, and if we were going to have to be separated, I didn’t want to be with any of them.” I gathered my legs into my arm and rested my ear on my knees and studied his profile. “Making Trip jealous was just a pleasant side effect.” I bit my lip in chagrin.

He threw his head back and laughed. “I love it that you are so honest.” His eyes sobered and fastened onto mine. “So, are you two—a couple?”

I sighed. Were we a couple? It felt like it was trying to happen, and I couldn’t deny there was intense physical attraction between us, but something was holding me back, and I had a feeling it had everything to do with the unbelievably sweet and warm boy sitting beside me. I wanted to answer Corey honestly. He deserved the truth.

“Corey, I don’t know the answer to that question. If I did, I promise I would tell you.” I put my forehead in the dip between my boney kneecaps. “I think he would like to believe that we are a couple. From his perspective, he has waited to be reunited with me for three years. From my perspective, I have only known him for a few hours. I mean, it isn’t like I spent an eternity with him. You on the other hand…”

“I know, Kate. I have loved you for a thousand years and yet only had a few moments with you.”

“Exactly.” I turned to him and saw a tear trickling down his face. I reached up and wiped the tear with my thumb and cupped his cheek. He kissed my palm and tenderness flooded me. I found myself leaning toward him, needing him, wanting to wrap myself around him and resume our endless kissing.

He put his forehead to mine and closed his eyes. I could feel his breath on my face and I breathed it into myself needing any part of him. Just when I thought his lips would find mine, he spoke in a ragged whispered.

“Not until you know for sure, Kate. I won’t tear you apart, like this.” He took my face in his hands, kissed my forehead, then stood and pulled me up beside him. “We go find cave or big stick weapon! Ug!” He pounded his chest.

I snorted. “You big caveman. Drag me by my hair to cook you dino ribs.”

“If only I could be so lucky.” Corey gathered my hair and twisted it over his hands, gently, smiling into my eyes.

“Corey,” I crimped my brows. “What exactly did we learn in the Scriptorium?”

He raised his eyebrows, took my hand and we started up the hill. “Well, I’m not sure.”

“Trip and Tara learned some mad fighting skills. What exactly did we take out of our experience…I mean except for this…” I waved my hand back and forth between our chests. “…this connection.” My face flushed at the understatement.

“It’s just that I know someone is going to ask sooner or later. We were chosen first, as team leaders, so it is going to occur to them at some point that our experience should have been extremely enlightening.”

He stopped walking and turned to face me. “It was definitely enlightening.” He touched my cheek.

I smiled. “Yeah, but I don’t think I want to share those parts with everyone. I want to keep those enlightening moments between the two of us.”

“Right.” Corey pierced me with a confused expression. I realized that he might have taken that to mean that I didn’t want to tell Trip about our connection, but I really just meant I wanted to keep the precious moments with Corey private, our own sweet secret. I didn’t know how to say that without it sounding like I was making excuses. We resumed our climb.

“There was the Voice.”

“Yeah, the Voice. Was that God?” I asked hesitantly.

“I think so. It felt divine.” He touched his heart.

“But also extremely personal, almost like…”

He looked steadily at me. “Like?”

“This is going to sound weird, but it was like our love for each other was…”

“..created by him.”

“…encouraged.”

“Like it
was
him.” Corey nodded.

“It is weird, huh?”

“Radically weird.”

The hill jutted up steeply and we had to press our full attention on scrambling up the incline. We reached a ledge and stopped to rest. At this height we could see over the pockets of mist and noted the sky wasn’t blue, but a bright pink. I assumed it was the sun rising through the mist, but something about the sky made me feel nostalgic, then I remembered the pink fluffy clouds that Corey and I had lived in for an eternity. I reached for his hand and it was there reaching for mine.

I stared into the beautiful sky for a few moments squeezing Corey’s hand tightly, and then turned to look at him. He was watching me intently, his blue eyes sincere and comforting. I had lived in those eyes, once upon a time.

“Was it real?” I whispered, lost in the fathomless depths of his gaze.

“It was.”

“How do you know?”

He leaned over to me and stroked the skin on my face, down my jawline, he touched my lips and sketched a line down my neck to my collar bone. I closed my eyes lost in the memory of his skin on mine. He put his lips to my ear and whispered.