The Valkyrie (13 page)

***

Honour stared
at the full glass of champagne in her hand and thought it was a
shame that it was intact. Those poor bubbles left to burst forlorn
in her glass untouched by her lips. She looked around the room and
saw a pretty blonde nymph laughing at one of Dionysius’s jokes.
Then she looked at Bea. Now Honour liked Bea, she really did, but
on Olympus Bea seemed strange. The light had died in her eyes.
Switching thoughts and making idle chat Honour turned to
effervescent Glory.

“I don’t mind
Athena, she’s smart, but I do always wonder what is wrong with
these sworn virgins.” Honour said playing with her earrings.

“Yes it’s
curious isn’t it?” Glory replied. Honour knew that this was
something that Glory had often mulled over. Honour never had
understood what went ‘wrong’ for Glory. What had happened to her to
make her so heartbreakingly jaded?

“It’s almost
Freudian.” Honour said. A comment which Bea acknowledged with a wry
smile and a brief nod.

“Parents fuck
you up: her poor mother.” Glory said wounded. The trio stood in
silence for a minute or so, almost in remembrance of Metis before
the damned silence became too much for Honour.

“Don’t get me
wrong I love a knees up, but they only actually got engaged last
night and yet here we are the next afternoon at a party that must
have taken weeks to organise.” Honour said in tones hushed enough
that no one else would hear.

“The Oracle of
Delphi?” Bea asked.

Honour wasn’t
sure if she was being sarcastic. “Yes I suppose, Apollo is god of
prophecy.” Honour concluded that that was a semi rational
explanation after all.

“Bollocks he’s
psychopathic Mystic Meg with a guitar; he’s been planning it all to
the nth degree.” Glory looked at her feet, the briefest moment of
clarity struck her before fleeing. What on earth was this marriage
really about?

***

The Valkyries
had been there for forty-five minutes and bugger all had actually
happened yet. Glory was only half answering Honour. She had moved
on to working out the most strategically advantageous spot in the
room for a swift escape if needs be. She had been calculating
whether jumping from an open window would be a viable option, when
Aphrodite histrionically threw up her hands on either side of her
face like an open prayer to the sky and stormed out of the room in
a chiffon cyclone. Aphrodite’s magnificent exit was something to
behold. The room had been organised much like a nightclub in in the
1920s (CE) with round tables in a semicircle surrounding a dance
floor that faced a small raised stage. Aphrodite walked in a
straight line to the door with no regard for the furniture, like a
true roman. She gracefully climbed over a chair and then a table.
Aphrodite then proceeded to sashay over the tables before playfully
gliding to the next like they were leap pads. It was as if the
girls were watching a real life Chanel advert. With her angry
exquisite movement Aphrodite blew off all the petals from the
flowers from the arrangements that Hera had been passive
aggressively arranging. Thousands of rose petals billowed in the
air. After stepping off the last table and floating to the door
Aphrodite turned and gave Glory the ugliest sneer to which Glory
merely looked back puzzled.

Glory wasn’t
sure why Aphrodite had taken such umbrage with her. This was an
extra layer of risk to factor in now; presumably Aphrodite was
circling the building outside like a shark that’s smelt blood.
Glory looked over to Ares who smirked and shrugged ‘a well that was
fun whilst it lasted’ sort of shrug. Glory wanted to know what he
was thinking although she had already guessed he was trying to
break up with Aphrodite. Honour was dumb from the spectacle she had
seen. Bea was staring at Hera who had really lost her shit. Hestia
was trying to placate her by saying that petals scattered
everywhere was actually quite pretty. That wasn’t what Hera wanted
to hear. Glory was bracing herself for Ares. He looked likely to
come over and talk to her, publicly. She felt another presence by
her side instead. Prometheus stood there in formalwear with a crisp
white shirt with a wing tip collar. Liberty’s glamorous mother Asia
hung on his arm looking rather smug by the marriage coup her
daughter had pulled.

“Good evening
ladies.” Prometheus said gracefully.

“Hello, it’s
very nice to see you again Glory and Honour.” Asia said.

“Hi” Glory
said. Honour nodded still shocked by the shells that had detonated
already that evening.

“You must be
the new girl Bea?” Asia shook Bea’s hand.

“Pleased to
meet you. Do you know where the bar is? I have got to make a
blasted speech? Glory would you accompany me?” Prometheus asked
offering Glory his arm.

“But of
course.” Glory accepted his invitation and the pair walked over to
a corner of the room that clearly had no alcohol in it whatsoever
bar the virginal champagne in Glory’s hand. After seeing Prometheus
take Glory by the arm Ares left the room as he’d missed his chance.
Glory and Ares followed each other with their eyes as they both
crossed the room. Asia stood and chatted to Honour and Bea for a
while before spotting someone else she knew.

“The bar’s over
there.” Glory impishly gesticulated towards the actual bar.

“So it is. I
don’t like this blasted wedding business.” Prometheus said.

“Neither do
I.”

“I’m not sure
how to stop it, but I’m sure one of us will think of something over
the next few hours. I suspect some form of foul play on Apollo’s
part, but before that a few things have been bothering me as I
assume they are bothering you to? You were the one to talk to
Valour on the phone were you not?” Prometheus asked to which Glory
nodded. “Are you very sure it was her?”

“Why yes, I’m
certain it was her.”

“Alright, I
trust your judgement.”

“Who else could
it have been?” Glory asked, the sudden fear that she had allowed
such an oversight struck her forcefully.

“Now is neither
the time nor the place for pursuing that thought further.”

“You said a few
things were bothering you, what are the other two?” Glory asked,
gathering her composure.

“Yes, who on
earth is Bea and why did Athena look so strange?”

“What?” Glory
didn’t think anyone else had noticed that.

“I’d watch your
back. You’ve angered Aphrodite with your little
escapade
today as you’ve made Ares like you even more. Excuse me I have to
make a speech in a few moments.” Prometheus bowed and moved towards
the stage. Glory didn’t care whether everyone knew about her silly
little act of matricide but she always forgot Prometheus could see
straight through her. She’d always been curious about how much he
truly knew and how much was bravado. Glory walked back over to
Honour and Bea as by then nearly all the errant Olympians had made
their way into the room as well as hosts of nymphs, muses, river
gods and all the other petty nature gods under Olympus’s dominion.
Moments later the chief stepped in. There was Zeus: King of Olympus
and father of Glory. The old git walked over to the bar and propped
it up. Last in was the happy couple. Liberty looked positively
delightful and thoroughly delighted, and Apollo looked like a smug
twat.

“Well Liberty
looks happy at least.” Honour said. Evidently some of her anger
from the night before had relented.

“She isn’t
happy, that’s her Ketamine face.” Glory watched her dear friend for
signs of distress.

Zeus had downed
his drink and turned to the stage. He clearly wanted to get his
speech over and done with so he could fuck off. Glory motioned for
the girls to move further towards the exit so they could leave as
soon as the toast was done. Liberty wasn’t going to notice whether
they were there or not in her delirium. Glory thought Prometheus
was right, there was foul play afoot. Zeus had taken to the stage
and surveyed his audience like the paranoid despot he was.

“I should like
to thank you all for coming here today, I take great pleasure in my
son Apollo’s forthcoming nuptials to the beautiful Liberty, even if
she’s Prometheus’s daughter, you fucker you. Why aren’t you dead
yet? Now we all know that Apollo is a bit of a cad so well done
dear in tying him down, I can’t believe that it’s because you’re
pregnant as that hasn’t stopped him before.” Zeus said much to the
amusement of many of the Olympians present, Prometheus was poker
faced and Glory and Honour both worked hard to not show their
abject disgust.

“Shot gun.”
Dionysius yelled.

“Shot not.
Where’s the booze?” Zeus said as he wandered off.

“I’d like to
extend my congratulations to the happy couple and I propose a toast
to them both ahead of their wedding day: to Apollo and Liberty.”
Prometheus said with elegance as he rose his glass “To Apollo and
Liberty.”

“Oompa.” the
crowd said in unison.

“What huh, yes
to Apollo and Jennifer.” Zeus said as he picked up his second
pint.

“How do you let
your only child marry the serial rapist son of the god that tied
you to a rock for centuries to have your liver picked out every day
by their pet eagle?” Honour quietly said aside to Glory.

“On this very
special occasion I’ve composed a song.” Apollo spirited an acoustic
guitar from somewhere the sun doesn’t shine and began to strum a
few notes.

“Fuck no. Do
you think I’ll get away with smashing his guitar?” Glory asked
sincerely.

“Probably not
although I’m sure the sound of wood and string shattering across
the floor would be very melodic. When has what you can get away
with ever stopped you?” Bea asked.

“You’re not
fond of Apollo are you?” Honour asked.

“No.” Bea
said

“That is very
sensible of you.” Honour said.

“Honour,
Dionysius has been eating you with his eyes for the last ten
minutes.” Glory’s eyes narrowed on her favourite pisshead.

“What? Ah shit
he’s coming over.” Honour said.

“Hello all.
Honour would you like a drink.” Dionysius sidled up to Honour
getting a bit too close, the pervert.

“Oh look
there’s your wife.” Honour walked across the room waving
enthusiastically at a pleasant looking woman “Hello, Ariadne how
are you?”

“Well.” Bea
said.

“Well.”
Dionysius said as he scaled up the prospect of shagging Bea.

“Fuck off.”
Glory said.

“Right.” He
turned and walked away painfully aware that he wasn’t going to make
any headway with either of those two.

“Nice
deflection from Honour there, she’s progressing tactically.” Glory
was proud “I wonder where Eros is?”

“I’m under
here.” A voice said. Glory lifted up the tablecloth of the nearest
table and found a handsome teenage looking man-boy underneath. He
was the sort to set fifteen year old girls off in screaming fits.
Glory climbed underneath the table leaving Bea as lookout.

“So what are
you up to these days?” Glory asked.

“Matching
people on Tinder mostly.” Eros said. “I’ve kept up my half of the
bargain, if that’s why you’re looking for me. Don’t hurt me.”

“I’m not going
to hurt you.” Glory had always been baffled why anyone had put a
teenaged boy in charge of falling in love. “I merely want
information.”

“What’s in it
for me?” Eros asked.

“An Xbox.”

“And…”

“My first born
child?” Glory asked. “Fine you can touch my boobs.”

“What
information do you want?”

“First things
first, why does your mother look like she’s going to kill me?”

“Because you
killed you’re mother. With her dead you are unfettered; you
satisfied your Electra complex. She thinks you’ll fall truly in
love with Ares now and that he’ll marry you. I’m just about
managing to shield our bargain from her.” Eros said swiping right
on his phone screen. “Half of Olympus will know that you killed
Britannia by now, but luckily for you it’s the half that doesn’t
give a hoot. Ares finds matricide erotic. Watch your back.”

“Our agreement
still stands?” Glory asked.

“Of course, I
won’t meddle with you until you say it’s alright to, although you
really should have realised that that isn’t how love works by now.
You don’t get to choose even if I don’t take an active helping
hand, frequently it’s a fixed point in time and as such nothing can
be done about it.”

“Alright then,
well I’ve got a second question.”

“Okay, go ahead
and ask. Oh wait do you think this girl would work with a solicitor
who plays ultimate Frisbee on the weekend?” Eros asked as he showed
Glory his phone.

“Oh no,
definitely not, the poor girl. So second question, was this wedding
debacle your doing?”

Eros looked her
square in the eyes. “No comment. Is that all?” Eros asked turning
cold.

“Yes, that’s
all. Thank you for the help” Glory said as she began to climb out
from under the table.

“Did it feel
good?”

“Did what feel
good?” Glory asked, confused by the question.

“Stabbing your
mother, did it feel good to stab your mother to death? To feel her
blood drip down your arm from the knife in your hand?”

“It was better
than sex.” Glory meant it. Eros nodded his head. Glory came out
from under the table to find Liberty babbling away to Bea and a
Dionysius free Honour.

“Is this all
not heavenly?” Liberty asked.

“Are you
alright?” Glory asked.

“Perfectly so.”
Liberty said.

“Are you sure?”
Glory asked.

“Yes, why
wouldn’t I be?” Liberty asked.

“Your eyes are
huge.” Glory said.

“You looked
very happy earlier.” Bea said steering the conversation.

“Thank you, I
am truly happy.” Liberty said.

“Well that’s
what matters, isn’t it Honour.” Glory said.