The Will to Love (7 page)

“Even if you didn’t? Everyone makes mistakes and God knows I’m not perfect.”

“I never said I wanted you to be either.”

They clasped hands; Will had to admit it had been a long time since he’d felt that close to anyone but for some reason, Laurel gave him the strength he needed to get through all the crap going on in his life.

She leaned her head against his shoulder, and as his heart thundered in his chest, everything between them felt perfect. It was an illusion but damn, did it feel good for him to pretend everything between them was absolutely fine.

Chapter Five

Laurel

IT DIDN’T MATTER how many times I’d been to Vegas, there was always a magic, frenetic energy about the city that acted like a drug and flowed through my veins. I loved the place and perhaps I could admit to myself I hoped Scarlet Fever took the deal to play here for the next two years.

I was tired of L.A. and the drama that came with living in the city. I wasn’t very close to either one of my former best friends.

The separation between Faith and I didn’t bother me that much because the bitch had always been crazy but now that she was a full on drug addict and the weird ass threesome she shared between Jaden and his on-again/off-again relationship with Talia Viaro was just a bit too much for me to take. The only drugs I used were my prescribed Xanax, marijuana and alcohol so her whole descent into the world of hard drugs was a complete and utter mystery I didn’t understand.

Why someone would get off on using Oxycontin and coke was a complete and utter mystery to me. I was too much of a controlling bitch—except when I was in the middle of a anxiety attack—and I could never allow drugs to rule my life. Plus Will was too much of a health nut despite his love for his cigarettes and marijuana. He wouldn’t have tolerated that kind of behavior from me regardless.

Syd’s situation was a bit different and although she’d started the tour as the average “stupid girl”, she’d metamorphosed into a stunning young woman who knew what she wanted and wasn’t afraid to have an opinion. All the sudden, she knew who she was and it was awesome to watch her grow a pair and face up against Kaz. However, it was a tough situation because all I could see was tragedy. She was slowly morphing into her mother and she would be willing to raise their son without him rather than put up with his bullshit. The problem was I don’t think he knew this small fact and it could cost him the “love of his life.”

I had issues of my own but that didn’t mean I’d forgotten about my two BFFs and wished we were as close as we’d been. There were times I would have given anything in the world to talk to them instead of my sister. Not only was she the band’s press manager but she also wasn’t the most empathetic person and when I’d approached her about my issues, she usually had her head so far up her Samsung Note’s ass, she barely listened to what I told her.

The fact that she knew about what Will and Grant were up to was a surprise until I realized it directly affected the band’s reputation and it was her job that their clandestine affair never got out. Of course she’d known and me keeping it from her meant nothing; she would have had to know if she’d put a stop to it before they could get engaged.

“What’s the matter?” Will whispered into my ear, his masculine voice sent chills down my spine.

“Do we have to spend the night at Paul and Jerrica’s? I mean…I adore them but I don’t necessarily want to be there…not tonight. I don’t feel like talking about us to them.”

“We’ll get a hotel, babe. Where do you want to stay? MGM Grand? Caesars Palace? The Cosmopolitan?”

I clutched my Ulysse Nardin and began to book us into a suite at Vogue Hotel, Casino and Spa. “Might as well make it convenient for you. I just booked us a very pricey suite at Vogue. Isn’t that where the meeting is going to be held tomorrow?”

Will kissed my lips quickly. “Yes, it is. Thanks, babe.”

Kaz cleared his throat. He sat across from us in the spacious limo and downed a straight Courvoisier like it was water. “Don’t you think that is a bit rude? We were all invited to spend the weekend with our financial manager and his wife.”

I scrunched up my face in my annoyance.

Yes, Kaz was a sexy guy but what Syd saw in him was beyond me. He had an uncouth quality about him and it was hard for me to believe he’d grown up in our same social circle. Shortly after he and Syd started dating, I asked my parents about him and they’d told me he’d disappeared off the radar after his seventeenth birthday. My father, being the thorough Scandinavian he was, actually checked the private schools and he’d never been registered in any of them.

I had a feeling there was a lot more to him than met the eye but Syd didn’t know much about him either during his teenage years and what she knew, she wasn’t willing to share with me.

“Listen, we’ll be back tomorrow after the meeting so what’s the problem? Is it so wrong we would rather have some private time together?” I snapped without thinking about who I was talking to.

Will’s blue eyes glared between the two of us but I could give a fuck as Kaz’s aquamarine eyes turned colder than an Eskimo’s dick. “Listen, I know you think you’re special because you’re the photographer for our band and Winter’s Regret but don’t forget you’re easily replaceable.”

My heart beat fiercely in my chest though my voice never flinched. “If you think I’m not up to doing my job, by all means, report me to Dom and I’m sure he’ll be able to find a replacement for me in no time, Kasper. I would just hate for him to find out the reason
why
you think I’m so…inadequate. I didn’t realize Will was under your beck and motherfuckin’ call.”

I stared down the lead singer of the band for several more agonizing seconds until he rolled down the partition between the driver and us. “We’ll be making a detour on the Strip to Vogue Hotel and Casino. One of the band member’s and his girlfriend are staying there tonight.”

“Yes, sir,” the driver said with little emotion before he took the Tropicana exit and got onto the Strip, which was a virtual parking lot on a Friday night.

I’d never been so relieved to get out of a vehicle as I was when we pulled up and both Will and I got out while a valet whistled to a bell hop to get our luggage.

“Good evening, Mr. Cullen and Ms. Munsen. Your suite is ready. Just let me know when you’re ready to go to the club and I’ll get you two a limo, courtesy of the hotel. Here’s my number if you need anything.”

Will grabbed the card from the valet and smiled. “Thanks, Roger. I wonder if anyone missed me. It’s been a while since I’ve been there.”

“Believe me, sir, you were missed.”

I waited until we’d checked in and had boarded the elevator. “What was that about?
What
club were you two talking about?”

Will looked so innocent yet mischievous as he said, “Club X-Tasy. It’s a—”

“Bondage, domination, and sadomasochism club. I’ve been to the New York location in the meat packing district. I’ve dated all types, including a stock broker who liked pain. Please don’t tell me you’re a pain whore.” My heart began to thud faster in my chest; this was a whole new side to Will I was seeing and I wondered why I knew nothing about it.

“No, I’m not. Even as a gay man though I look like the classic twink, I’m actually a dominant. I can count the number of times I have been fucked in the ass and it’s not because I don’t enjoy it…it’s a loss of control and unfortunately, I have a hard time giving up control to anyone.”

“How long have you been a member? It’s one hundred grand a year when I dated Mr. Pain Whore Stockbroker Boy.

“It’s still one hundred grand but I get a deep discount.”

My eyebrows arched upwards. “And why is that?”

Will smiled slightly. “I worked at the L.A. location for almost two years. Although I was not a pain whore…I sometimes had to put up with the degradation and that meant me being fucked even when I didn’t want to be. I still came but it wasn’t something I would have done had it not been my job. Imagine that, a gay man not enjoying gay sex. But the dominant women with the strap-ons were the worst because they thought you were a fucking animated doll.”

He sighed before he continued. “Just know that all the sex there was in fact consensual and safe. It was good money and besides, I didn’t stay at the club for long…I started working for one of the Krieger twins and I lived in his home. I rarely saw him—I was just paid to be there and service him when he was town. When the band took off, I quit and he understood but he was generous enough to provide me with a lifetime membership.”

I didn’t know how to respond to anything Will had just told me. He’d been a sex slave/escort before he made it big with Scarlet Fever.

“So, you’re not the least bit worried about working for the same man again in a different capacity?”

Will’s lips pursed before his crystal blue eyes stared deeply into mine. “I never said I worked for Rory. Rory Krieger owns Vogue Hotel and Casino—his brother, Severin Krieger, doesn’t have anything to do with the hotel though he is a member of the Board.”

“I vaguely know who they are. My dad is Danish after all and we pretty much know most of the wealthy families in Scandinavia and Germany. They’re identical twins so how do you know they didn’t switch sometimes? How do you know you were always servicing the same twin?”

“The eyes are the window to the soul,” he said as he gently touched my jaw with his right hand. “Only Seven can give someone a heartless, penetrating gaze like he has no soul. Rory isn’t capable of it because he, unfortunately, has empathetic qualities Severin could never possess.”

The elevator stopped and we stepped out. There were only four suites per floor this high up and we quickly found ours. “So, which brother did you work for?”

“I won’t tell you because you want to know too bad and besides, I’m bound by a confidentiality agreement. I can’t disclose which brother I worked for or the Krieger family only has to make a phone call and all the sudden, I don’t have a job. It’s as simple as that for them to ruin me.”

I dropped the conversation as he opened the door to the suite and I walked inside, followed by him.

The layout was similar to every other luxury suite I’d ever stayed in and after a six month tour where all I saw was the inside of various luxury hotels—not to mention a lifetime of growing up wealthy, traveling and staying in the best hotels on the planet—they’d lost their appeal a long time ago.

Our luggage awaited us in the spacious sitting room. I quickly headed for the bar and made myself a straight Grey Goose without ice and downed it.

“What should I wear?” I inquired, shattering the silence between the two of us.

Will strode over, the bar separating us. “What did you wear when you accompanied your stockbroker boyfriend?”

“He said it was a surprise so I just wore something trashy yet classy by Versace. It was black and paired with a pair of Manolo Blahniks if I’m not mistaken but since I’m with you, I brought all types of clothing. Should I wear something leather? I’ve got this cool black leather bustier I can pair with a short pair of leather shorts and thigh high boots. It sounds sluttier than it is but I’d look hot and I’d blend in.” I leaned on the bar, our skin touched one another’s and the electric pulses it sent through me went straight to my groin.