The Wolf's Mate Book 7: Lindy & The Wulfen (4 page)

“Why do you look like you wish you were punching someone?” her boss asked, joining her in the YA aisle.

“Bad night.”

Stella was in her late forties and didn’t look like the sort of woman who normally owned a bookstore.  Her arms were covered with tattoos, and she wore tight jeans, heeled boots, and heavy metal T-shirts.  She was an amazing, sweet woman.

She was also very intuitive.

“If you’re not happy with your life, Lindy, then make some changes.  You’re in charge of your happiness.”

She hummed in her throat.  She’d been thinking the same thing.  “I don’t like how I dress.”

“Oh? I have some ‘80s rocker tees you might like.”  Stella smiled broadly.

“Thanks, but I mean the slutty stuff.  It was…fun and freeing to wear that kind of stuff before, but now it just makes me feel like I’m displaying stuff no one wants anymore.”

“So a new wardrobe, that’s easy enough.  What else?”  Stella leaned against the shelf and listened while Lindy talked about redoing her home and purging the bad memories.

“You know something else you could do?  Community service.  You read to the kids once a week, which is awesome, but you could become more active in other ways, too.  Have you considered that?  You’re talking about making outward changes, which is a good first step, but often helping others makes us aware of how good we have things and makes us feel better about ourselves, too.”

Lindy put another book on the shelf and said, “I hadn’t thought of that.  I could start being more active in the pack and around town.  Mac’s grandma lives in the retirement community in Allen, and she would probably know about some people who might like a helping hand.  Thanks, Stella.”

“You’re welcome, sweets.  We’ve all been there, okay?  I was a party girl at your age, too.  Some women live that way their whole lives, never really settling down, moving from one adventure to the next.  There’s nothing wrong with that way of life, unless you are feeling like it’s not for you anymore.  You’re allowed to make changes to your life, and if people don’t accept what you’re doing, then they can go to hell.”

Helping people would take the focus off herself, get her out of her poor-me feelings, and give her a purpose.  And if she could help with the pack, then she would feel more valuable as a pack member, and that was something she wanted now. 
If
they were willing to accept the changes she wanted to make.  She knew that Mac and Faith would accept her and love her no matter what, but she was unsure of the rest of the pack.  And even if they didn’t accept her, well, they could just fuck off.

* * * * *

Sunday afternoon, Cadence Gerrick put her daughter, Lyric, in the booster seat at the kitchen table and ruffled her blonde hair.  “What’s for lunch, little wolf?  How about some delicious broccoli?”

Her nearly one-year-old daughter squealed happily and slapped her palms on the table a few times as she said one of the few words she could say clearly, “Chicken.”

Cades grinned at her daughter.  “You sound just like your daddy.”

“Why, because she’s so brilliant?”  Jason asked as he strode into the kitchen.  He snagged Cades around the waist and pulled her close.

“No, because she only wants meat.  I can hardly get her to eat veggies.”  She sighed as Jason nuzzled under her ear.

“Meat’s good,” he growled, and the sound slipped down Cades’ spine like a decadent caress.  “You’re better.”

She slapped his shoulder.  “Behave.  Your daughter is hungry.”

“When’s her nap?”  He nipped her neck and grinned.

“Soon, my feisty mate.”  He released her reluctantly and sat down at the table next to Lyric.  Turning her attention to the refrigerator, she pulled out chicken breasts and put them on the counter.  Cutting two breasts into chunks, she dropped them into a hot pan and gave them a stir with a long-handled wooden spoon.  After cleaning up the mess she’d made, she poured a glass of apple juice and put it down in front of her daughter, asking Jason if he wanted anything for lunch.

He leaned back in the chair and hooked his arm over the back.  She was momentarily frozen as she watched his shirt stretch over his muscular chest.  He always had that affect on her.  Made her brain fizzle out when he flashed her one of his panty-melting smiles or casually flexed.  Although she doubted he did anything casually. He knew how much he affected her, and she was glad that she affected him the same way.

“I’m going to head back to the clearing.  I’m thinking about widening the clearing by taking down some trees.  Dad and Grandpa are meeting me back there.”

“The pit could probably stand to be dug out again.  Seems like we put less wood in it every full moon because it doesn’t take much to fill it up.  When we were kids, the pit seemed a lot deeper.”

He gave her a smirk.  “Maybe that was because we were smaller?”

She stuck her tongue out, and he laughed.

“I’ll add it to the to-do list before the July full moon.”

He stood and stretched, bending over to kiss Lyric on the cheek.  “I’ll be back, mate.”

“I’ll be waiting.”

She watched him leave the house, enjoying the way his jeans hugged his butt.  Turning her attention to lunch, she turned the chicken over in the pan and put together her own meal.  Lyric was different than Cades, but that was to be expected.  Cades was only half wolf, a hybrid with some wolfish abilities like fangs on the full moon and some extra sensory abilities, but Jason was a powerful alpha wolf.  Lyric was not a full wolf, but she was showing wolf tendencies at an early age, which led everyone to speculate that she might be able to shift when she reached sixteen.

Cades wanted that for her daughter.  She’d spent the better part of her life standing on the outskirts of the pack because she wasn’t a true wolf.  Sure she was alpha female, but she hadn’t been included in pack dealings as a youngster and had grown up on the outside looking in.  She didn’t want that for Lyric.  Or any other children that Cades and Jason had.

Dumping the contents of the pan onto a plastic plate decorated with Lyric’s favorite cartoon character, Cades squeezed ketchup in a small dollop and added a few pieces of broccoli just for good measure.

“No, Mama.”  Lyric made a face, screwing up her mouth in a snarl that was almost exactly like Jason’s as she pushed the broccoli off the plate and onto the table.

Cades chuckled, and put her own plate on the table, and had pulled her chair out, just as the doorbell rang.

Not wanting to leave Lyric alone, she called, “It’s open!”

There was a pause, and then the door opened with a creak, closed, and footsteps came down the hall toward the kitchen.  Cades’ mouth fell open in surprise as Lindy stood in the archway of the kitchen.  She looked…different.  Her long, blonde hair was pulled back in a French braid, she wore almost no makeup, giving her a youthful, fresh-faced look, and she wore a pale peach T-shirt and tan capris with blue tennis shoes.

“Lindy?”

“Hi.  I’m sorry to come without calling first, but I was hoping that you might have some time to talk?”

She glanced at Lyric, who had taken one look at Lindy then turned her attention to the plate of chicken.  “Sure.  Have a seat.  Have you eaten?”

“I’m good, thanks.”  She pulled out a chair across from Cades and sat down.

Cades sniffed.  “You smell like herbs.”

Lindy blushed slightly.  “That’s sage.  Faith and McKenna helped me smudge my house after we cleaned it yesterday.”

Cades frowned.  “Smudge?”

“You light a bundle of dried sage and use the smoke to cleanse the negativity out of your home.  The scent is kind of everywhere in my house and on my skin still.  Sorry if it bothers you.”

Thoroughly intrigued, Cades pushed her plate aside.  Lindy had cleansed the negativity from her home?  Why?

Seeming to read Cades’ mind, Lindy told Cades that she had taken a good, long look at her life and wasn’t happy with what she had become.

“I know I’ve made a lot of mistakes,” she said earnestly, “but I want to change.  I’m tired of being a pariah, a joke.”  She glanced at Lyric and then at Cades.  “I’m just like my mom.  I followed in her footsteps to the letter.  Except she’s never gotten tired of the endless males and trying to
bed
her way into a mating.  I wish I could go back in time and tell my teenage-self that the road I was about to head down would lead to heartache and loneliness.”

It was true that Cades had never cared for Lindy personally.  They were the same age and had been in school together, and Lindy and other females like her had taken immeasurable joy in making sure that Cades knew she was different and not wanted.  She’d gone after Jason, Michael, and every other unmated male in the pack.  When Cades took over as alpha female, Lindy, along with the other females in the pack, had accepted her as their alpha.  While the females who had picked on Cades as a youth had changed their tune, some of them, like Lindy, had simply focused their attentions on finding another male once Jason was claimed.

Cades could admit that she’d never really thought much about the females who weren’t active in the pack.  She spent time with her mother-in-law, Tina, the mates she was close to, and those few females who really wanted to be part of the pack.

“I didn’t know you were feeling so lost, Lindy.  I’m sorry that I haven’t shown much of an interest in you and your friends.  I just assumed you were happier to have little to do with the pack.”

Lindy toyed with one of Lyric’s stuffed animals that were strewn across the table.  “I was happier, for a while.  But I took a good look at myself in the light of day, and I hate what I saw.  I don’t want to be that girl anymore.  I want to bury her and embrace the person I feel is the real me, the one I always kept muzzled.”

Cades felt a genuine connection bloom between herself and Lindy.  She was asking for help.  Cades could be petty, but she didn’t think that was the way an alpha should act.

Leaning back in her chair, she said, “It won’t be easy.  The pack won’t accept that you’ve changed, not right away.”

“I’m doing it for myself, not for anyone else.  If they don’t like the new me, that’s okay, because I do.”  She rubbed the collar of her shirt.  “I threw out all my trashy clothes and shoes.  Faith helped me take everything to Goodwill.  I redecorated my house and got rid of everything that reminded me of the person I used to be. I like to knit.  I never told anyone that.  I had a teacher in elementary school who showed me how one day when my mom forgot to pick me up from school.  Last night I went to a craft store and got yarn and needles and started making a scarf.”  She smiled.  “It felt really good.”

Standing to refill Lyric’s juice, Cades turned back to the table and said, “Good for you.”  Sitting down again, she said, “Tell me what I can do to help.”

Lindy exhaled slowly and outlined a plan to help out around the retirement community.  Cades offered her own suggestions for things she could do, including helping out more with the pack’s full moon celebrations.

“Tell you what.  Come back and see me in a couple weeks and let me know how things are going.  If anyone gives you a hard time, let me know immediately, okay?”

“I will.  Thanks, Cades.”

“You’re welcome.”  She stood as Lindy stood and was surprised when she came around the table and gave her a quick hug.

“I’m sorry for all the trouble I gave you when we were young,” Lindy said.  “You didn’t deserve it.  I was jealous of you and behaved in a petty and stupid way.  Thank you for seeing past all that bad behavior.  I was worried you’d send me away.”

“The past can stay in the past where it belongs.  I’m willing to move beyond it, if you are.”

Lindy nodded and left.

“Well, wasn’t that interesting?”  Cades said to Lyric, who was rubbing her fingers in the leftover ketchup and painting a picture on the table.

“Mama?”  Lyric licked her finger and then popped it back into the ketchup.

“Yeah, baby girl?”

“Chicken.”

* * * * *

The following week, Lindy spent two hours after work every night helping out Mac’s grandma, Eula.  Eula was a very active senior who liked to take walks around the community and visit with everyone.  Lindy accompanied her on the walks, carrying packages of baked goods or meals that Eula made.  At first, the elder wolves had seemed wary of Lindy being around, and she’d worried that she wouldn’t be accepted. But Eula was a firecracker and refused to allow anyone to treat Lindy badly.  It didn’t take long before she felt at home in the community.

Shyne, the mate of the second ranked in the pack, Michael, passed Lindy on Thursday evening as she made the rounds with Eula.  “Hey, I was looking for you!”  Shyne said.  She was a pretty Latina with a bright smile.

“You were?”

“Yeah.  Are you free on Saturday?  Cades said you were willing to help out with pack stuff, and the retirement community is having a yard sale, and I could really use some help handing out flyers at the entrance to the community on Saturday.”

“I’d love to.”

“Great!  Come to the community center at seven a.m., and we’ll get ready for the crowds!”