I didn’t want to cry, or interrupt this beautiful day with my emotions, but I couldn’t stop the silent tears that slid down my cheeks as Chris hugged me close against him. I laid my head against his chest and wept not only for those who lost their lives, but for those who were left behind. For the women who brought flowers and laid them on the ground under their sons’ names. For the men who knelt in prayer beneath their wives’ names. For the firefighters who lost their brothers. For all the tears that were being shed around me because they were missing someone. For all of those who didn’t get the chance to say goodbye.
Chris cradled my head against his chest. “You’re a beautiful person, Salem,” he said with conviction, “inside and out.” His voice wavered with suppressed emotion.
I looked up at him, seeing compassion and empathy in his eyes. “Thank you for bringing me here.”
Cupping my cheeks, he gently wiped my tears away with his thumbs. He kissed me softly on the forehead and whispered, “I knew it was something we shouldn’t miss while we were here.”
Just then, he reached down and clasped my hand, lacing his fingers with mine. We walked back toward the subway while he quietly hummed the tune of Lee Greenwood’s “God Bless the USA” under his breath. The smooth timbre of Chris’s voice, as it resonated in my ears, drowned out the noise on the streets, the blaring horns, the roar of a thousand voices talking on their cell phones, and the pounding jackhammer from the construction sites. And for a moment, he was mine.
I was emotionally drained, but apparently Chris wanted to make one more stop before we headed back to the hotel to get ready for dinner.
“Empire State Building,” Chris announced with a smile, perking up from the sadness we’d just walked away from. “We’re going to the top.”
A spark of excitement hit me. “Really?”
He nodded. “The New York skyline is something you don’t want to miss. The view is amazing.” He spoke like he’d seen it a hundred times.
“Great. This will be fun.” I tried to stuff down my fear of heights as it knotted my stomach.
He pulled on our joined hands. “But first, we need to make a stop.”
“Okay.” I bit my lip nervously, wondering where he was taking me then he walked us into an outdoor supply store.
Outdoor supplies?
I hung out near the books, flipping through the pages while Chris made his purchases, paying no attention to all the tents and footwear on the shelves.
“Going camping?” I asked, once we were outside in the coolness and chaos of blinking lights and honking taxis.
“Nah,” he said, adding cryptically. “Not any time soon.”
I left it alone as we rode the subway back to Spring Street. Chris hopped off with a spring in his step, tugging me along next to him. We exited the station, which was near that same wall outside the pizza place where Joe sat on his pile of newspapers with Buster in his lap. The cardboard sign had blown over from a draft of wind, and the empty pizza box flapped open in the breeze. Joe smiled when he saw us coming and Buster’s tail wagged excitedly. I wondered if he remembered us from earlier and thought we had more food for him.
Chris held the bag out to the man, and my heart stopped. He bought this stuff for Joe. I was so touched by his gesture that I took a step back so Chris wouldn’t see the tears that had sprung to my eyes. A confused Joe sifted through the large bag and pulled out two thick pairs of wool socks. His eyes immediately shone, glazing with emotion as he gave us his gummy smile.
“Thank you,” he said softly, nodding as if to shake the tears away.
Chris smiled. “Keep warm.”
Joe tugged the plastic bag off of the large item in the bag, and I watched him unfold a Western Mountaineering Alpinlite sleeping bag. Joe looked up with tears in his eyes. “I… I don’t know what to say… Thank you so much.”
This was breaking my heart. Rock stars weren’t supposed to be this selfless.
That’s just it, Salem. Chris isn’t a rock star. He’s just Chris. The same Chris you’ve always known.
Chris nodded, taking a deep breath. He turned his face away, but I didn’t miss that his eyes were glassy too. Joe reached both hands out and took Chris’s hand. Buster licked their hands, barked, and ran around in a circle chasing his tail. Chris rubbed Buster’s head then patted Joe on the back.
Joe’s voice wavered. “God bless you, son. How can I ever repay you?”
Chris shrugged, humbled. “I was just thinking the same thing in regard to you serving our country.”
Joe shook Chris’s hand fiercely. “It was an honor.”
I saw a man snapping pictures out of the corner of my eye, but I ignored him. This was a precious moment that didn’t need to be tainted by the tabloids.
Chris was right. The view truly was spectacular. We took a few pictures from the observatory. I think my favorite part of the whole day was watching Chris cut loose and let go. He was thoroughly enjoying himself. We took turns snapping silly pictures with our phones, posing in the goofiest ways with the skyline in the background. My favorite was the one where I was smiling at the camera and he looked like he was about to eat my face. I texted that one to Alexis.
Me: Having a great time with your favorite rock star.
Alexis: Mom! No fair! J/K Glad u r having fun. C u tomorrow.
Tomorrow.
Ugh.
My weekend with Chris was almost over. I wasn’t ready. My heart pinched at the thought. I didn’t want to say goodbye. This was the happiest I’d been in a while. Chris made me laugh. We had such a great time together. I knew I would miss the warmth of his hand in mine. I’d miss the closeness I felt in his arms when he hugged me. I’d miss his smile, his laughter, and the giddy look on his face when he really let himself go. I was just getting used to having him around. It was already breaking my heart to have to let him go again.
Later that night I crawled under the down comforter in my hotel bed. My legs were tired and my feet ached, but my heart was refreshed.
I curled myself into a ball and fell promptly asleep with a smile on my face.
It seemed as if I had just closed my eyes when I heard a knock at my door. The knocking didn’t stop until I opened it.
“Chris?” I said, rubbing my tired eyes and glancing at the clock.
2:15am.
His hands were stuffed in his pockets, acting nervous and oddly energized for this hour. “I just wanted to see you again,” he said sheepishly. “Can I come in?”
“Of course.” I held the door open for him as he stepped into the room then quickly closed out the bright light of the hallway by shutting the door behind him. Immediately self-conscious of my middle-of-the-night, death-warmed-over look that I felt certain I was sporting at two in the morning, I swiftly ran my fingers through my hair.
Chris sat near the edge of the hotel bed. His gaze bounced anxiously around the room, stopping on everything but me. “It’s your last night in New York with me… our last night together.” I hated the sadness in his voice. He must’ve been having a hard time with this whole ‘goodbye’ thing too.
I hesitantly sat down beside him. “I know,” I sighed, matching his tone and thinking of the wonderful moments we’d shared the past two days.
Chris nervously ran his hand through his hair, “Salem, would you… uh… wanna dance with me?”
“Huh?” I asked, shaking myself from my deep contemplation. A dance was an odd thing to ask for at two in the morning. But suddenly, my legs turned to Jello and I wasn’t sure I’d be able to stand up.
“A dance… a celebration dance.” Chris held his hand out to me. “Will you dance with me?”
“Uh,” I took his hand, allowing him to pull me up off the bed. “Okay,” I said nearly in the form of a question, ignoring the fact that my stomach was turning somersaults inside of me.
Chris grabbed his phone, chose a song, and placed it into the dock on the desk. Then, pulling me against his chest, he held my waist and we began to dance. The music softly began playing through the speakers—a song I immediately recognized, which warmed my heart. The song,
Thank You for Saving My Life
featuring Brian McKnight, poured through the speakers. I hadn’t danced with anyone since senior prom. I wasn’t sure my feet knew how to move properly to the beat. I gulped down my nerves and tried my best to sway along with him, enjoying the feeling of being in his arms again.
He smiled at me, a bit of embarrassment in his breathy tone. “I downloaded this song just this morning. I took a chance on getting to see you tonight. Couldn’t think of a better way to thank you for everything,” Chris admitted.
I cocked my head to the side and smiled. “You could have sung it to me,” I flirted.
He stared at me intensely. I wondered if he was thinking of the time he sang in the cafeteria, and the bond we shared that prompted him to write that song for me. “Oh. Yeah, I guess I could have done that… maybe later…” his voice trailed.
Later?
There would be a later? Butterflies awakened in my stomach while a blush crept up my neck.
Stop it, Salem. Later doesn’t mean anything.
Chris pulled me close, wrapping his arms tightly around me. We swayed silently back and forth to the beat of the music. I laid my head on his chest, listening to his heart pounding deep inside. Running my hands over his sculpted pecs and across his rippled abs, I couldn’t help the feeling that was welling up inside of me. Chris whispered into my ear, “Listen to the words. They say everything I want to say to you.”
Through the lyrics, I heard him thanking me for saving his life. But there was more. They also hinted that love was in the air and he’d just been waiting for me to come back into his life. Just as those lines were sung, I pulled away and our eyes met.
Glassy with tears, his expression spoke emotions he’d been reluctant to show me before now. He was bearing himself for me… becoming vulnerable for me. I didn’t know what to say, or how to respond. He stared down at me with those dark, sultry eyes—a look that exuded hunger… an aching desire that turned my insides into mush.
“I’m so glad you’re here with me, Salem,” he whispered. Cupping my face in his hands, he rubbed his thumbs across my cheeks, staring at my lips as he leaned forward.
I froze.
Oh crap! Is he going to kiss me?
I never tore my eyes away from his gaze. Our lips literally inches from each other, he paused. Staring into his dark eyes—irises speckled with hints of chocolate and caramel—I could almost feel the thoughts that were swirling around in his head.
“Thank you, Salem. Thank you more than words can say,” he whispered, then tilted my head down.
I waited. My eyes slipped closed, and I waited for that soft pressure to touch my lips. But it didn’t come. Instead, he pressed a tender kiss on my forehead, and I tried to stifle the disappointment that strangled me.
His lips were soft and supple against the delicate skin of my forehead. I could still feel the tingle of my nerve endings as he pulled away. I imagined what they would feel like on my lips, and felt an urge deep inside me too strong to ignore.
“You saved me too,” I reminded him. “You didn’t know it back then, but you did. So, thank you…”
I didn’t know what I was thinking. I didn’t even try to stop myself. With every ounce of courage I had, I leaned in fast and crushed my lips against his. He seemed shocked at first, unmoving and frozen stiff. Those sexy lips that I had imagined touching mine were as delightfully delicious as I knew they would be. Instinctively, I pressed myself against him and reached up to grab the back of his head. Immediately, Chris’s stiff posture dissolved and his control snapped as he entangled his hands in my hair, hungrily kissing me back. His urgent kisses shot darts of desire zinging throughout my body. Chris pressed his hips into me, rocking against me as his tongue delved for a deeper connection. Our tongues wrestled, twisting and turning in our mouths, hungry for each other. I melted into his body, allowing him to explore my shoulders, back, and face with his hands. He ran his strong, capable hands over my body, making my stomach quake. Every nerve ending was ignited with energy, and the strangest sensation overcame me. A feeling of pure euphoria—the kind of euphoria that felt so good it hurt.