Theta (43 page)

“
Phoibe!” The shout came
from the other side of camp.

I finished throwing up and
stood carefully. My legs shook, and I had the urge to run as far
from this place as possible. My anger was completely gone this
morning. All I could think about was how I had not only murdered
tens of people, but I’d
eaten
parts of several of them!

My thoughts shifted as I awoke fully and
made my way towards those searching for me. Had I gotten here in
time to stop the complete destruction of my army? To give my people
a chance to escape?

Where was Menelaus? Did I dream him coming
with me?

The night was too hazy for me to recall
details with any sort of certainty. My stomach turned again, and I
snapped my gaze up, beyond the piles of bodies.

“
She’s here!” Unfazed by
the massacre, Herakles spotted me long before I did him. He raced
towards me, blanket in hand. With no consideration for my title or
standing in the world, he draped the blanket around me and swept me
up into his arms. His concerned gaze searched my face. “Are you
okay?”

He was surrounded by dozens
of dead, and he wanted to know if
I
was okay? I didn’t think I’d ever appreciated him
as much as I did in that moment.

I started to squirm. The jolting sensation
inside me made me suck in a breath and go still, lest I threw up
all over him. When I’d conquered the urge to vomit again, I
nodded.

Reaching two of our vehicles, he set me down
on the ground and went to one truck to grab a pack.

“
Kyros!” he belted loudly
enough to be heard across camp. Kneeling, he pulled out a bottle of
water and handed it to me. “I’m no doctor, but you look okay. No
worse than Menelaus. He took a couple of bullets.”

I sat up straighter.

“
He’s alive and recovered,
thanks to Kyros,” Herakles added. “I brought you clothing and
enough wet wipes to take off all the blood. I can make you
breakfast quickly, too.” He pulled a portable stove out of the
pack, along with sausage, eggs and bread.

How he was so calm and accepting of my
transformation and massacre, I had no idea.

My thoughts went unexpectedly to the
insistence of Kyros that I tell Herakles about Alessandra. Guilt
fluttered through me. Herakles had never once let me down, never
once questioned my orders, and never once failed to help or guide
me. His actions and heart were pure, much more so than mine.

Notebook?
I wrote into the dirt.

“
I’ll find one in a
minute,” he said and placed a small frying pan on the
stove.

The army?
I scrawled next.

“
We’re estimating a twenty
percent loss of personnel,” he replied quietly. “It would’ve been
eighty percent, if you and the old man hadn’t stopped the missile
fire.”

So we had succeeded at some level. Twenty
percent loss was huge, but it wasn’t as bad as I thought when I
hovered over the camp last night. I was relieved and a little
surprised. My beast side had thought nothing of stopping the
missiles but of seeking revenge against those attacking us. Was it
possible the two sides of me were more integrated than I thought?
That I didn’t need to be in control of my monster to remain …
me?

“
For the record, I was
right.” Herakles gave a tight smile. “The army
loves
the idea of following a monster.
Grotesque. Whatever.”

I pursed my lips in what he would recognize
was mild disapproval. He retrieved a notebook and pen from the
interior of the vehicle and handed them to me. I watched him make
me breakfast amidst the corpses of our enemies.

I had to tell him about Alessandra. I didn’t
want to, and a bad reaction from him would hurt my efforts, but he
deserved to know. As breakfast cooked, I wrote him a note about the
Oracle he considered to be his daughter. I made an effort to keep
it short and to use small words, but the letter stretched for two
pages. When I finished, I moved behind the truck, with the wet
wipes and clothing. Torn about whether or not to reveal the truth,
I cleaned myself up and pulled on clothing before deciding I had to
do this, because a good leader would tell her most trusted advisor
the truth.

Returning to the other side of the truck, I
sat. When he handed me a plate, I handed him the notebook.

“
You wrote me a book,” he
said, glancing down at it. His eyes were glued to the two words at
the top.
About Alessandra

I stood and walked away, leaving him in
peace. My hands trembled as I ate, and I watched his expression
change in a way that caused me pain. I forced myself to face him,
because I deserved to hurt after hiding the truth from him.

“
You did the right thing,”
Kyros said softly from behind me.

Did I?
I replied bitterly.
What if he
walks?

“
What if he stays?” he
countered. “Your army still has the best chance of rescuing his
daughter.”

Not after last night. We lost our supplies
and home.

“
Almost everyone survived.
Not only that, but they know
you
saved them. ”

Hearing the truth, I was still inconsolable.
I should have predicted the attack or ordered an evacuation after
Adonis disappeared. I had saved most of my army, but I had also not
been the one who prevented their danger in the first place.

“
They’re soldiers. They
understand,” Kyros said.

Not all of them are soldiers. They’re
volunteers whose lives were destroyed by the gods. I owed them more
than to let fire fall from the skies and finish them off.

“
You did the best you
could.”

It wasn’t enough. Anything short of complete
victory would never be enough to justify everything humanity had
lost, and would lose, in the war to come.

“
You’re just full of it,”
Kyros said with a laugh. “You hurt?”

I ignored him.

He touched my upper arm, and a flicker of
warmth shot through me. “Bruises and scrapes are now gone. Along
with the bruised ribs.” His hand dropped.

I released the breath I’d been holding. My
body moved more easily after his touch, and I rolled my shoulders
back.

Did you heal all the wounded already?

“
As many as possible. We
evacuated according to Plan Pegasus, whatever that is. I don’t know
where all the different backup sites are. We wanted to find you
first then travel to see the rest of the army.”

I had a feeling Herakles was regretting his
kindness. He stood, bristling. He didn’t look at me but tore the
pages from the notebook, crumpled them, and threw them then the pad
of paper into the forest. He strode off, towards the woods, and
away from me.

I started forward.

“
Ummmm no.” Kyros caught my
arm. “Give him some time to breathe and think.”

I hated the twisting feeling in my gut but
did as he suggested and stayed where I was.

“
What next?” Kyros
asked.

We rebuild. But we do it
smarter. Multiple sites instead of one main one, similar to how
Dosy set up the insurgency.
Turning, I
gazed up at him. Dark circles lined his eyes, and he wore a
smile.

“
Okay. Leave Herakles a
truck, and we’ll start.”

I lifted my chin.

“
Or …” He sighed. “You can
make the decision.”

I glanced in the direction Herakles had
gone. I wanted to go after him, not because I hoped he would remain
with my cause, but because I cared about him.

We’ll give him an hour or
two, then do as you suggested,
I
decided.
Where is Menelaus?

“
Sleeping. He didn’t handle
the stress of last night as well as you. Claimed he’s too old for
this shit.”

I had a few choice words for the Bloodline
member I didn’t know existed, and even more to say to Apollo. As I
looked out over the destruction Menelaus and I had caused, I
focused on how well prepared and supplied the Supreme Magistrate
really was. Adonis had believed we would fail quickly and
absolutely if we faced Cleon’s forces directly, and I began to
agree with him. They had nearly destroyed us from twenty kilometers
away.

I was spooked. For the first time since
leaving DC, I felt like my eyes were open to what I was doing. I
had always considered my war with Cleon to be secondary to my true
purpose, but how was I going to defeat him and retake his army,
when a few missiles had sent my forces into hiding? My supplies
were gone, my people scattered, and my staffing down twenty
percent.

What would I do to win? To defeat Cleon? How
far would I have to go in order to end his tyranny and restore the
government to the people, before I could attack the gods?

“
I know someone willing to
help you reclaim the city.” Paeon was back, as displayed by the
bright blue eyes peering out of Kyros’ face.

I pinned Kyros-Paeon with a
look.
I need help toppling Cleon before I
can face the gods, and I need real answers about what’s going on,
to include why they’re possessing people.

“
You want to work with us
then destroy us.”

Yes.

“
Oddly enough, I think a
few gods might be willing to listen to your proposal. Would you
consider a modification to your truce? Namely, will you consent to
allow us to return to our home rather than slaughter
us?”

Opening the bridge is
outside my control,
I replied.

“
For now. But once you take
the city, and with your intent to either work with the Oracle or
kill her, if she can’t or won’t help you, there might be a window
where we can return home.”

Every cell of my body rebelled at the idea
of working with the gods. My jaw clenched, and I was tense enough
that I wanted to turn back from this path already.

Why are you willing to aid
me, when you know I might turn on you?
I
demanded.
I hate your kind, and I will not
stop until you all are gone from the Earth.

“
Let’s just say there’s
more going on than you know yet. We’re trapped her. Did you ever
wonder who has the power to trap us, and why?” he asked
cautiously.

I don’t care. I’d see you all murdered in
your beds.

“
Then let’s stick to our
original deal. You at least try to open the bridge to send us home,
or don’t interfere with us if we find a way to return home, and
we’ll help you through the wall.”

I hated,
hated
the idea of working
with the gods.

These were emotions. The beast side of me.
Instincts I couldn’t allow to cloud my judgment. Not when the lives
of my army depended upon me to protect them and lead them to
victory. Last night had been a wake up call in many ways, to
include the stark reality that I was playing in a sandbox while
Cleon focused on conquering the entire desert. He had sent sixty
men and three missile launching vehicles to take me out, and he’d
almost succeeded.

If I stood any chance of taking the city, I
needed the help from beings far more powerful than I was.

Very well.
I said.
We will cease
hunting your kind, and I will expect you to participate in my
war.

“
Done.” Paeon
smiled.

You speak on behalf of Zeus
now?
I snapped.

“
In this matter, yes. He
sent me to broker a peace with you, and I’ve finally
succeeded.”

When your kind leaves,
you’ll release Kyros,
I added.
And any other human you’ve enslaved or
possessed.

“
We will.”

Nothing about this sat right. Even
understanding I now had the potential key to victory on my side, I
wanted to vomit again from forcing myself to work with those I
hated most in the world.

But my war against the gods didn’t matter,
if I couldn’t take the city, usurp Cleon, protect what remained of
humanity, and rescue, or destroy, Alessandra.

We’re done,
I said, at my limit with negotiating with the
gods.
Bring back Kyros.

Paeon’s eyes turned to brown, and I started
to relax when Kyros' smile returned.

“
He is so happy right now,”
he reported.

I’m not.

My thoughts weren’t as much on the Bloodline
as on my unborn twins. Assuming any of us survived the apocalypse,
would they still suffer from the curse as my family had for ten
thousand years? By choosing to work with the gods, was I
sacrificing the fates of my own children?

Sick to my stomach again, I tossed what
remained of my breakfast.

“
For what it’s worth, I
think you made the right decision,” Kyros said.

What does a football player
from rural Virginia know of war, curses, and defending
humanity?
The words were much harsher than
I intended, but I was feeling emotionally raw from the rough night
and fear for my babies.

“
Not much,” he replied
softly, unfazed. He held my gaze. His dark eyes were filled with
compassion and warmth, neither of which I deserved. “You’re doing
your best.”

It wasn’t enough. I moved away, unable to
understand how he thought the best of me, even now, after I’d sold
out my principals and potentially condemned by children.