Three Way (28 page)

When I open the door to the flat, I hear voices talking. I enter quietly and close the door behind me. Ashley and Parker are talking in the living room, I stand and listen in the hallway.

‘…he doesn’t hate you. Just needs to calm down, that’s all,’ Ashley says.

‘So stupid, I just didn’t want to cause him any more pain, been through enough already and they had pretty much split up anyway-,’ Parker replies.

‘I know.’

The conversation stops. I open the front door again and close it loudly. Parker opens the living room door.

‘Alright?’ he asks.

‘Not really,’ I say. My anger for Parker has all but gone. I don’t hold anything against him. He’s not the sort of person who would deliberately screw me over.

‘Did you see her?’ he asks.

‘Yeah,’ I reply. Ashley appears next to Parker.

‘Hey,’ she says.

‘Hi,’ I say.

‘I’m making coffee, you guys want?’ she asks. Parker looks at me. I shrug.

‘Take that as a yes,’ he says to Ashley, ‘I’ll have a cup as well, if that’s alright?’ She nods, and touches my shoulder as she moves past us. Parker heads back into the living room and sits down. I follow him. We sit opposite each other, neither saying anything for a moment. I hear the kettle boil in the kitchen. ‘So what did she say?’ he asks.

‘She told me never to contact her again,’ I reply.

‘Did you shout at her?’

‘No. I was angry but I didn’t shout. She said she was tired of dealing with…this. Don’t blame her. I have been slightly psychotic about it.’

‘Yeah. Still, be better if your friends were more supportive,’ Parker says. I glance at him, he looks genuinely sorry. I go to say something but Ashley walks in with two cups of coffee and some Digestive biscuits on a plate.

‘Try the biscuits first,’ she says, ‘I have no idea how long they’ve been in there.’

‘Thanks,’ I say.

‘Parker told me what happened,’ Ashley says.

‘She told him she doesn’t want to see him again,’ Parker says. Ashley looks at me.

‘Ah,’ she says, sitting down next to me. She starts to rub my knee.

‘What she actually said was fuck off,’ I say. Parker raises his eyebrows.

‘Svelta said fuck off? Wow,’ he says.

‘Yeah. Never heard her speak like that,’ I reply, replaying her face in my mind as she said those words.

‘You gonna be okay?’ Ashley asks. I nod, automatically. The truth is I have no idea if I’ll be okay. If she means, will my heart keep beating, will my lungs keep taking in air, then yes, I’ll be okay.

‘Sorry guys, I know I’m being pathetic,’ I say.

‘No you’re not,’ Parker says. I look at Ashley who gives me a sympathetic smile.

‘He’s right. You’re just sad. Understandably. We’ve all had relationships not work out, and it’s horrible when that happens. The fact is, it ended a long time ago and you’ve been holding on to it. On to her. It’s time to let her go. You’ve got Lauren-’ I almost sneer as she says Lauren’s name. Don’t get me wrong, Lauren’s great. She just has one problem. She’s not Svetla. ‘Lauren’s really nice and she’s got big tits which has to be a positive when we’re looking at these things,’ Ashley says. I chuckle, so does Parker. ‘Don’t dismiss Lauren just because you’ve had your head up your arse over Svetla.’

‘You know what we should do?’ Parker says. ‘We should go out. All of us. You, me, Ash, Lauren, Nicola. It’ll cheer us up. Ashley’s only just split up with Norman-’

‘Yeah, thanks for reminding me,’ Ashley says.

‘So, let’s go out. Clubbing.’

‘I really don’t feel like clubbing,’ I say.

‘Of course you don’t…until you get there,’ Parker says.

Jamboree. I stare at the sign above the door. I don’t want to do this but Parker just wouldn’t shut up. What I wanted to do was sit in my room and feel sorry for myself whilst thumbing through old photos and watching videos of me and Svetla.

The air has a chill to it, summer coming to an end? It barely even started. Anyway, present are myself, Ashley, Nicola, (who’s wearing knee-high boots) and Parker who’s wearing a shirt and has something in his hair that makes it look permanently wet. What a sad case. Do women go for that? Nicola seems suitably impressed. Thank God girls care more about things like personality than looks. I called Lauren but she didn’t answer, so I left a message telling her what we were doing, where and when. I’d like to see her again but I don’t want her to pick up any self-pitying vibes, so it would be fine if she didn’t come. We pay our ten pounds entry fee (ten pounds, Jesus I’m getting old) and go in.

We are immediately greeted by thumping R&B music. It’s already rammed and I feel an immediate urge to leave. Ashley presses her finger into my back pushing me to carry on. The bar runs along one side, a blue neon strip lighting the floor directly underneath it. People dance wherever they can find a space. The place is full of girls who wear very little and guys who spend a lot of time in the gym. We find a dark corner and stand looking at each other.

‘Drinks?’ Parker asks.

‘I’ll get them,’ I say.

‘You stay where you are,’ Parker replies. ‘What do you want?’

‘Beer, anything,’ I reply. Parker goes round, taking orders then disappears off to the bar with Nicola.

‘Is Lauren coming then?’ Ashley asks.

‘I don’t know. She didn’t answer. Probably not,’ I reply.

‘Then you’ll just have to settle for me,’ Ashley replies.

‘I don’t ‘settle’ for you. You’re a good friend.’

‘No I’m not, but thanks for the sentiment.’

‘Heard anything from Norman?’

‘You don’t have to small talk with me, Ollie.’

‘I’m not, just asking.’

‘No. Norman is gone.’

‘And job hunt?’ I ask.

‘Nothing yet but I’m looking. Don’t worry, you’ll get your rent.’

‘I don’t care about that.’

‘Yeah you do.’

‘Maybe you should do something with the piano stuff. You were really good.’

‘Thanks,’ she replies, offering nothing more. ‘Look at that girl there.’ I look to where she’s pointing.

‘Who?’

‘Who?’ she repeats, sarcastically. ‘You know exactly who I’m talking about.’ I’m afraid Ashley is right. There’s a girl dancing in the middle of four guys who has almost nothing on. I’m not kidding. She’s wearing what looks like a swimsuit type thing with a skirt so short it’s almost unworthy of the title ‘skirt.’

‘Yeah okay,’ I reply.

‘You think she’s fit?’

‘No,’ I reply, automatically. Ashley turns to me, her eyebrow raised.

‘Alright yes, but in an obvious way.’

‘Look at those guys staring at her.’ We watch her moving and gyrating to the music. All attention within a five-metre radius focused on her. ‘Maybe I should start doing stuff like that, at least I’d get a shag.’

‘Well, if that’s all you want,’ I say, smiling. She chuckles.

‘You’re off limits now, you have a girlfriend.’

‘Yeah. Bummer.’

‘For you. Definitely,’ she replies. I smile. Parker and Nicola return with drinks.

‘Stella for you,’ Parker says offering me the glass. ‘The white wine is for Ash,’ he says to Nicola who hands Ashley the wine.

‘Thanks,’ Ashley says.

‘So, Parker tells me you’ve been stalking your ex,’ Nicola says. I stare at Parker who looks like his eyes are about to pop out of his head. He quickly shakes his head.

‘What? No, that’s not what I said,’ Parker says.

‘I’m not stalking her. I just…’ I stop in mid-flow. What was I doing? Trying to get her back? Making her feel guilty for not taking me back? ‘…had trouble accepting it was over.’

‘But you’ve got a new girlfriend now?’

‘Baby, I don’t think you should-’ Parker says.

‘It’s okay,’ I say to Parker. ‘Yes.’

‘But, you don’t like her as much as your ex?’

‘It’s new and I’m…adjusting.’

‘As I previously indicated, she does have a very nice pair though,’ says Ashley.

‘Why do you keep bringing up her tits?’ Parker asks.

‘Yeah, why do you, Ash?’ I say.

‘What? A woman can’t comment on another woman’s tits?’

‘Sure. In fact I actively encourage it. But you seem to have a mild obsession with Lauren’s,’ I say.

‘Is she fit then, this girl?’ Nicola asks, the alcohol clearly loosening her tongue. Ashley nods.

‘Yeah, a bit too fit actually,’ Ashley replies.

‘Girl crush?’ Nicola says. Ashley smiles and sips her drink.

‘Girl crush?’ I ask.

‘Yeah. Ashley has a girl crush on Lauren,’ Nicola says.

‘Do you?’ I ask. Ashley shrugs.

‘Maybe,’ Ashley says, eventually.

‘Cool,’ says Parker. I smile.

Before long, Ashley and Nicola have us all dancing. Or whatever you call what I’m doing now. Still, no one seems to mind and I admit I am enjoying myself. Svetla and I never used to dance, mainly because of me. I’m quite self conscious and I don’t really go in for big public displays. In this instance, alcohol is helping. I feel my phone vibrate in my pocket. I stop dancing and whip it out. It’s a text from Lauren which says ‘Hi, just got your message. Don’t think I can make it there now, prob too late but you could come over after if you fancy? L x.’ I consider her offer. I will, of course, be a lot drunker by the time I finish here. Do I want to spend the night at Lauren’s? Do I want free sex and a warm body to cosy up to? What sort of questions are these? I click reply ‘Sounds good, not sure what time. Will you still be up at 1?’ I click reply and carry on dancing.

‘Who’s that, Lauren?’ Ashley asks. I wipe a bead of sweat from my forehead and nod.

‘Yeah,’ I say.

‘Is she coming down?’

‘No. But I might go over to hers once we’re done here,’ I say.

‘Mate, we’re pulling an all-nighter. Can’t bail halfway through,’ Parker says.

‘Are we? No one told me.’

‘I’m telling you now,’ he says. My phone vibrates again and I check the message which says, ‘Maybe rain check. I’ll call you tomorrow.’ I feel slightly disappointed. Okay, I understand why she didn’t want to come down at this late stage but meeting up would have been nice.

‘Well?’ Parker asks.

‘Rain check. Guess she wants to go to bed,’ I reply.

‘So we’re still on for all night?’ he asks.

‘What the hell,’ I reply.

Sunday. Feel horrible. Where the hell am I, anyway? Doesn’t look like my room. I open my eyes wider. The floor is on the ceiling. What…oh hang on. I pull myself up. A rush of blood to my head sends me back onto the bed. I now stare at the correct ceiling. It’s still not a ceiling I recognise though. I rub my eyes, scratching sleep out of them. I feel like I’ve been hit by a train. I sit up, slower this time, and look around. I’m in a dimly lit girl’s room. Everything is pink. There are fluffy toys everywhere and a poster of Barbie on the wall. I hear distant voices behind the door. I also seem to have an erection. It’s fine, just need to find a toilet and that will be gone in a jiffy. I stand, get out of bed, wearing only my boxers and walk slowly over to the door. I carefully pull it open and listen. The voices sound like Parker and someone I don’t recognise. Am I in some sort of alternate universe where our flat has been girlified? Is this, in fact, my bedroom? I don’t have any answers and in my desperation for the toilet, I look down the corridor searching for likely candidates. Where the rest of my clothes are, is anyone’s guess. I go for it, sneaking to the first door on the right. I open it. Bathroom, close but no toilet. I pull the door closed and move to the next door. Suddenly I hear the female voice change location. She’s moving closer. Shit. I open the next door and sneak in. It’s dark. I look for a switch. Rather, I feel for a switch. Eventually I locate it and click it on. Turns out I’m in a small girl’s bedroom. Annoyingly, the small girl also occupies said bedroom and now her eyes are open, looking at me. We stare at each other, unsure what to say. I turn away as best I can, a pathetic attempt at hiding the lump in my pants. Oh this is so bad.