Timeless (18 page)

****

By the end of the week, everyone was talking
about Ben’s offer. Ben was, after all, only a junior. The
University of Florida had guaranteed him a spot on their swim team
because he’d been a star athlete before quitting the team. Just as
I predicted, he began swimming again. According to Annie, who
received regular updates from Zack, his grades had already begun to
improve by the third week, and I felt sure by Christmas that I’d
been able to turn his life around. That, at least, lessened my
guilt somewhat.

I didn’t try to experiment anymore with my
power. It was enough to know that I could do it. I was glad I could
use it to make Ben happy, and when he finally spoke to me for the
first time since we’d broken up, I felt almost cheerful. It was
near Christmas, and we were all about to go home for the break when
he came over to me in the parking lot after school.

“Emily, I just wanted you to know…I hope you
have a great Christmas,” he said, smiling at me.

He looked like he meant it.

“You too, Ben,” I said, genuinely glad to see
him looking so much better.

“I hope you’re happy,” he said quietly.

“I am,” I replied, eager to show him that I
felt more normal than I actually was. I still felt the loss of
Damien, but I was hopeful for March.

“So how is Damien?” he asked casually.

“I don’t know,” I replied. What should I say?
Oh, he’s dead, but I’m hoping to bring him alive soon?

“You mean you guys didn’t get together?” he
asked, amazed. I knew what he was thinking—why put him through all
that for nothing? I hoped he wasn’t right.

His voice sounded cautious, but there was a
note of hope there that I couldn’t help but feel drawn to despite
my desire to see him happy with someone else.

“I’m not seeing him again until March,” I
answered.

He looked at me, confused.

“I knew he didn’t live around here because I
would have known him, but come on, March? Where does this guy
live?” he asked.

I didn’t know what to say. The more I told,
the more difficult it became to explain.

I looked down, not answering.

“Oh, right, sorry. I guess I’m not allowed to
ask those questions…Well, anyway, I hope he’s making you happy,
wherever he is. Merry Christmas,” he finished and turned to walk
away.

“Merry Christmas, Ben,” I said to his
retreating figure.

I thought that by changing the events around
his life I could actually change his life. And I could, to a point.
But I couldn’t change his heart. I wasn’t even sure I really wanted
to.

I sighed and turned the key in the ignition.
A few sputtering sounds greeted my efforts. The engine felt like it
was about to go. Great. Right when I needed her the most, the
Saratoga wouldn’t start. I tried turning it again. This time,
nothing happened. I tried several more times, thinking that I would
have to use my power, when I heard the knock on my window. It was
Ben.

I rolled down the window.

“Looks like she’s finally giving out. Do you
want me to take a look? Or give you a lift home?” he offered
helpfully.

Ben reached inside to try the ignition. I
accidently brushed my hand against his and cringed. I knew he felt
his ring on my finger, hidden behind the steering wheel. I’d tried
to keep it from him, but I wasn’t sure what would happen if I
removed it. Since I’d used the ring to concentrate on reshaping the
events around his life, I didn’t want to take it off, afraid I
might unravel all my good work.

He grabbed my hand. A look of disbelief
crossed his face.

“Emily,” he began. I knew where this was
headed. It was written all over his face.

“Don’t say it,” I said quickly.

“For God’s sake, Emily, you’re wearing my
ring!” he exclaimed in confusion and happiness.

He had a point.

“I’m so sorry,” I whispered, withdrawing my
hand from his.

“What’s wrong with you? Do you have a
terminal illness you’re keeping from me or something? I mean, you
aren’t even with this Damien guy. Did you just make him up?” he
asked, exasperated.

Had I just made him up?

He didn’t wait for a response.

“Emily, whatever you’ve done or said, I
forgive you. I just want this to be over. I haven’t been without
you for longer than a week’s vacation, let alone months. I don’t
want to lose you forever. Whatever I’ve done, I’m sorry. Can’t we
just get past this?” he asked, the anguish in his voice tearing me
to shreds.

Now he was apologizing to me. I really was
the lowest creature on earth.

I had only one thought then. I had to get the
Saratoga started. I looked down, closed my eyes and started
thinking hard. The old girl finally came to life, and I looked one
last time at Ben, tears in my eyes.

“Ben, this can’t go on. You have Angela now,
and maybe one day we can be friends. But I’m sorry. I just can’t
right now. I hope you understand,” I said on a sob.

But how could he? I couldn’t tell him that I
loved a medieval knight whom I was either going to bring back from
the past or grieve over for the rest of my life. Even I didn’t
understand it.

I didn’t look at him as I drove away. I knew
that I was hurting him again, and coward that I was, I felt relief
to get away. I thought I could help him, could change his life, but
it was killing me. I wondered if I could concentrate hard enough to
produce enough cash to enroll in a private school until
graduation.

****

When I got home, I had four messages, three
of them from Annie and one from Ramona. I returned the call to
Ramona first, making sure that Aunt Jo was upstairs taking a nap
with the door closed.

“Hello, Emily,” Ramona answered instantly.
This always freaked me out a little.

“I got your message,” I said.

“I’ve just gotten back into town from a
conference,” she said.

“Oh yeah? Did you have a nice time?”

“Yes, I wish you could have joined me. I met
some interesting people.”

I’ll bet she did.

“And before you ask, yes, they were all
witches. I learned a few things that might be helpful to you in
March. And I bought you a present from an antiques dealer who also
happens to be a witch.”

“Do you want me to come down to the shop?” I
asked.

“Yes, can you come now?”

“Sure. I’ll be there in about five
minutes.”

I wrote Aunt Jo a note telling her I went to
see a friend and then headed over to Ramona’s store. I needed to
stop by the mechanic’s anyway to ask about bringing in the Saratoga
for Aunt Jo. Since I primarily drove it, the least I could do was
help to maintain it.

I stopped short, laughing. I didn’t need to
have it repaired by a mechanic. I could fix it myself with my
power. I’d still need to take it in, though, to get it diagnosed,
so to speak. I couldn’t imagine how to fix it if I didn’t know what
to concentrate on.

I made it to Ramona’s store a few minutes
after making an appointment with Bill, the only mechanic in town
who knew how to repair the Saratoga. I suddenly thought of Ben, who
was very good with cars, even old ones like Aunt Jo’s. I mentally
shook my head. That’s over, I told myself for the hundredth
time.

Ramona was waiting for me when I entered.

“Sorry I’m a few minutes late,” I said.

“That’s okay. I hope the Saratoga’s feeling
better,” she said.

“What? Oh, right. I keep forgetting.”

I followed her to the back room, but this
time we went into another sitting room with two large couches and a
small stove and fridge.

“Tea?” she asked.

“Sure.”

While she was making the tea, she told me
about her trip.

“You meet all sorts at these kinds of
events,’’ she said as she stirred the dark brew.

I chuckled, looking at her outrageous,
skin-tight green and black outfit. All sorts indeed, I thought.

“One woman had the power to control animals,”
she continued. “I’ve never seen the like!”

“Ramona, I’ve been wondering…” I
interrupted.

“Yes?”

“Will you let me ask first?”

“Were you going to ask me if you could change
Damien once he comes over?”

“Yes,” I said. If he comes over, I
thought.

“Now you want to know why.”

I hadn’t even thought that far ahead yet.

“Well, yes, actually. I don’t want to change
him per se. I just want him…”

“Modernized,” she finished.

Modernized? I wasn’t so sure about that.

“To be able to communicate with you, to
understand your life here when he crosses over,” she finished,
reading my thoughts.

This was starting to get on my nerves.

“Yes, something like that,” I replied.

“Remember I told you before that you could do
that,” she continued.

“But I still don’t see how. My power is to
shape events, not people.”

“But you will be bringing him from the past.
And that’s what I wanted to talk to you about. I met two other
witches who’ve done this. Timing, they said, was everything. It
must be the exact same time of year for it to work.”

“But I’m not sure of the date. I don’t think
they even had calendars then like we do now, or if they did, I
don’t remember it. I think we marked time with candles,” I
finished, trying to remember.

“That’s okay. You’ll be able to intuit it.
Both of them said they just knew when it felt like the right
time.”

“Did they bring people from their past
lives?”

“Yes. And get this: I met them! One was from
ancient Greece.”

I was catching Ramona’s enthusiasm and really
starting to believe that it could work.

“Could she talk with him normally?” I
asked.

“Yes, but she said she had to imagine being
able to converse with him when she brought him over. That was
essential. I spoke with the other woman, who didn’t do that, and it
didn’t work out so well.”

“What do you mean?”

“She brought him over from medieval
Italy—Siena—just before the plague. He’d died during an outbreak
that wiped out most of the city.”

“What happened?”

“Fortunately, she speaks Italian, but,
unfortunately, she didn’t think about the language differences
between fourteenth-century and twenty-first century Italian.”

“Oh no! What did she do?” I asked. This was
my biggest fear. How could we be together if we couldn’t even speak
to each other?

“What else? She’s teaching him modern
Italian. She couldn’t exactly enroll him in the local college,”
Ramona said, laughing.

“Oh, right,” I said, thinking that I’d never
be able to accomplish that.I wouldn’t know where to begin and
thought regretfully that I hadn’t ever paid much attention to my
language teachers in school.

By this time, Ramona had made the tea, and as
I began to sip the strong brew, she handed me a large, rectangular
box.

I felt pretty certain I knew what it
contained. Sure enough, when I opened it, I found small rosary
beads attached to a cross.

“Thanks, Ramona,” I said, enthusiastic for
the first time in months.

“They’re authentic. I checked,” she said
smugly.

“You mean…” It couldn’t be.

“Yes, early thirteenth century.”

“But you must have paid a fortune for this!
Where did you get it?”

“Actually, they were a gift. I just happened
to tell some of the others about you, and voila, one of them
volunteered this to help you! She’d been a time traveler herself.
They aren’t from England, but that shouldn’t make a big
difference.”

“No kidding. Thanks. I owe you.”

She laughed.

“Don’t worry; I’ll come to collect some day,”
she said cryptically, taking out another bag from one of the
overhead cabinets.

“What’s this?” I asked, curious.

“I told you I bought you something,” Ramona
said, handing it to me.

I could read Mary Kay on the side.

“Open it,” she said.

I removed the tissue paper and found a
complete make-up set, with brushes, glosses, and eye-shadows.

I raised an eyebrow. I never wore makeup.

“I thought you said you bought me something?
Don’t you sell this stuff?” I asked.

She looked a little sheepish.

“I do. But the conference was a Mary Kay
event,” she explained.

“I thought you said it was for witches?” I
asked, confused.

“It is. We like to look good too, you know,”
she said, laughing. “I bought it from the woman who gave me that
rosary,” she explained, shrugging her shoulders. “Even though I
sell the exact same product, it was the least I could do,” she
continued, laughing.

“Besides,” she explained, “you want to look
good for Damien when he comes over!”

She cackled, truly looking like a witch then,
and I couldn’t help but smile, wondering if I’d ever meet more of
our kind. I realized then that I’d begun to embrace who and what I
was. I guess I had to, not having much choice if I wanted to bring
Damien from the past.

I thanked Ramona for the gift and left
shortly after that, tucking the box with the rosary safely inside
my pocket. I felt surer about what I was going to do than ever. All
I had to do was wait. And hope I was strong enough.

Chapter Nine

"Limbo"

I said to my soul, be still, and wait without
hope

For hope would be hope for the wrong thing;
wait without love,

For love would be love of the wrong thing;
there is yet faith

But the faith and the love and the hope are
all in the waiting.

Wait without thought, for you are not ready
for thought:

So the darkness shall be the light, and the
stillness the dancing.

Whisper of running streams, and winter
lightning.

The wild thyme unseen and the wild
strawberry,

The laughter in the garden, echoed
ecstasy