To be Maria (17 page)

            "Okay," Maria says with a shrug of her shoulders.

            Anya passes through the entire morning in a daze of confusion and sadness. Her performance in English had been such a disaster that Mrs. Cummings kept her after class and pestered her with questions that Anya could not answer. Then came History, and after that, the dreaded lunch period.

            Lunch break at Peach Valley Senior High runs for forty-five minutes and it's the only time of the school day where students can socialize freely without having to worry about preparing for their next class. But lunch break spells danger for Anya: she is terrified of Carly and of those wannabe high school superstars who cling to Carly and act on her every whim without thinking first about the consequences. Today, Anya does the unthinkable: she eats her lunch in the girls' locker room beside the gymnasium. Even though the room smells like sweat, it is still better than every other room in the school because no one inhabits it at this time. Silence prevails, allowing Anya a small measure of time to emotionally prepare for the greatest battle to come; having to face Carly and Patrick in acting class.

            She pulls her journal and a pen out of her knapsack, then begins to write. The words flow from her head in a disorganized fashion, but they numb her distress until the bell rings. Anya shoves her journal and her plastic lunch containers back into her bag, then scampers out of the room before any of the girls, scheduled for P.E., notice her. As she steps out into the hallway, she takes deep breaths in effort to ease her anxiety.
Time to face the dragons.

            Just before Anya enters Mr. Hawthorne's studio, she feels someone's cruel hands on her right shoulder. Out of control, she hits the wall with force. A sharp pain shoots up and down her left arm, but she’s too stunned to pay attention to it. When she peers over her right shoulder, she finds Carly hovering over her.

            She miles sardonically at Anya. "Sorry, my hand slipped."

            Her friends laugh at Anya's degradation.

Red faced, Anya enters the studio fighting back tears. She seats herself down on the mat beside Patrick, but she can almost feel his body stiffen with apathy. She turns her head to look at him. "Hi, Patrick, do you…mind if…I sit with you?" Her face burns with the humiliation of her pathetic question. In the past, it wasn't a question of whether Patrick would let her sit by him: they were partners in everything they did. But now he refuses to forgive her. He does not even respond to her question. He continues to stare ahead, keeping his eyes fixed on the blackboard.

            She continues to look at him, the tears threatening to spill down her cheeks.
Come on, Patrick, say something. Please.

           
"So, now Patrick hates you too, Anya." Carly's snide voice echoes throughout the room.             Now, all eyes are on them.

            "Look at her. She's about to cry. Baby," Matt yells.

            "Why Jose even invited her is beyond me," Carly echoes.

            "Geez, no kidding. She has, like, no social skills," another girl says.

            "What a total loser."

            Patrick rakes his fingers through his hair. Instead of saying something in Anya's defense, he inches his body away from her until a wide, three-foot space separates the two of them. Thankfully, Mr. Hawthorne walks into the room just in time to stop the malicious chatter. Anya fixes her eyes on him. Usually he enters the studio with a cheerful look on his face, but today his face holds a worried look.

            "Good afternoon, class," he says. His voice carries an undertone of agitation. Then, he does what Anya feared he would do: he stares at her and Patrick as if to ask, 'haven't you guys made up?'

            "Today, we are going to rehearse in the theatre. We have less than three months before the show, so I want all of you to get used to the large space on the stage. Yes, Patrick."

            Anya jerks her head in Patrick's direction.

            "Will we be able to rehearse with the props on the stage?"

            "Yes. Starting next week, we will rehearse after school twice a week, but I will discuss this more tomorrow."

            It feels as if a hard lump of coal has formed in Anya's throat.
I have to spend that much time with Carly, Matt and Patrick? This is gonna be torture.

            "Come on, class, let's go. We don't have much time," Mr. Hawthorne says, his voice booming.

            With her head down, Anya follows everyone out of the studio, but Mr. Hawthorne stops her at the door.

            "What's wrong, Anya?"

            She averts her eyes from him because the perturbed look on his face is almost too much for her to bear. "Nothing," she says with a small shrug of her shoulders.

            "Obviously something's wrong because you and Patrick are still not speaking to each other, and you look like a frightened puppy."

           
You're right. I am afraid. I'm afraid of Carly. I'm afraid of everyone in this school.
"I tried to make up with him, but he won't forgive me." She feels his hand on her left shoulder.

            "Well, he plays your lover, so he will have to forgive you. He has no other choice."

            Anya bites down hard on her lower lip. "I sure hope so.”

****

            Anya spends the entire first scene of Act I on stage with Patrick. It goes much better than she had expected. Even though they are still on book, Patrick plays his character like a pro. The twinkle in his eyes and the tenderness in his voice ignite a flame of hope inside of her. The softness of his hands on her shoulders brings back memories of the past. She believes that he has forgiven her. All wounds have healed and now their friendship has blossomed into intimate love. Suddenly, she doesn't care about Carly and Matt. She grips her hands on the back of his head and presses her lips against his, a mime that had not been included in the first scene. This is the first time she has tasted his lips and they are sweet. She wishes this moment could go on forever, but it doesn't. Patrick jerks himself out of her embrace and looks at her as if she has just given him the kiss of death. His unexpected response throws Anya into a state of bewilderment. She doesn’t know whether to yell or cry.

            "Fantastic job, guys. Bravo," Mr. Hawthorne says with an enthusiastic round of applause. "Now, keep it flowing. Next scene."

            At the start of the second scene, Anya sits alone on the stage, pretending to read a book. Then Carly -- who plays the role of Maggie, Alice's maid -- marches onto the stage with much more vigor than what Maggie would do. Anya's heart skips a beat when she sees her.
Where did Carly get that bottle of water? She didn't have it in class.

           
"Good evening, Miss Cunningham, here is your afternoon tea and biscuits." Her voice is as sharp as a razor.

            A chorus of giggles echo throughout the spacious school theatre.

            "Stop," Mr. Hawthorne yells. "Carly, what are you doing?"

            The giggling amongst their peers becomes louder.

            Anya turns to give Carly a vengeful smile.
Now you know what it's like to walk in my shoes, Carly, and it serves you damn right.

           
Carly's face turns beet red. "I'm acting my part, Mr. Hawthorne."

            The incessant giggling escalates into boisterous laughter. Anya, herself, cannot contain her laughter. It brings her much joy to see her enemy exposed to the very same treatment that she gives to others on a daily basis.
Well, what do you think now, Carly? Karma's a bitch, isn't it.
Those words tingle the edge of her tongue, begging to be spoken. If it's not for the menacing look that Carly gives her, Anya would unleash them. Instead, she swallows them and waits in anticipation for the next blow of humiliation to strike Carly.

            "No, you're not. That’s not Maggie I'm seeing on stage. That’s Carly," Mr. Hawthorne says.

            An even louder round of laughter rings throughout the entire theatre. Anya laughs so hard, she can't breathe. Tears trickle down her face.
Who's the loser now, Carly?

           
"Carly, Maggie walks gracefully and she speaks to Miss Cunningham in a cheerful manner. But you just stormed on stage like some psychopath killer on a mission. This is a romance drama, not a bloody horror story. Get back stage and do this again."

            This time, Anya is the one who smiles smugly at Carly. For the first time in her life, she knows what it's like to be Carly and it feels good.

            On her second try, Carly perfects her character's disposition, except for eye contact. She glares fiercely at Anya, but Anya glares back at her, unafraid.
You better watch yourself, Carly. I'm no longer the loser you thought I was. I have friends now and they’re the kind of people who aren't gonna take attitude from anyone.

            "Carly! Anya! Stop!" Mr. Hawthorne’s booming voice echoes off every wall in the theatre.

            Anya snaps her head in his direction. The expression on his face spells exasperation.

            "Miss Cunningham and Maggie get along well together. But you two look like you're about to duel each other. Start from the top again. We are going to do this until you girls decide to put aside your personal differences and step inside your characters." His emphatic critique is followed by a chorus of frustrated sighs from the other students.

****

            It takes more than two tries for Anya and Carly to perfect that one scene before the bell rings, giving Mr. Hawthorne no chance to provide them with feedback. Disgruntled, the other students shuffle out of the theatre. Anya, though, dashes over to her creative writing class before Carly has a chance to pounce on her. She is on cloud nine.
I guess you're not as popular as you thought you were, Carly.

           
The last hour and a quarter of school flies by, leaving Anya feeling like she missed out on a good lesson on character profiling. Nonetheless, she is happy to cross another day of school off her calendar. The second the bell rings, she grabs her knapsack and scurries out of the school building. But half way across the field, she feels someone tugging hard on her knapsack. Stunned, Anya turns around to find Carly standing right there as well as Shondra and Kirsten. The three of them look at her as if to say, 'I'm going to kill you.'

            Carly glares at Anya. "So, you think you can get away after what you did to me?”

            This time, Anya does not tremble with fear. She can feel the anger bubble beneath the surface of her skin. "Did what, Carly? What did I do to you to make you so mad?"

            "First, you rob me of two-hundred-and-fifty dollars; then, you ruin Jose's party, and today, you humiliate me in front of the entire acting class."

            Anya balls her hands into fists. "Let's get one thing straight: you willingly chose to spend that money on me."

            "Well, I'm sorry I did. I didn't know you would turn into a rotten bitch."

            Anya's jaw drops. "Me? The bitch?"

            "Yes! You! If you don't give me back that money--"

            "Oh, screw you, Carly! That was all a part of your little plot to ruin my life. I'm not paying you back, so why don't you do everyone a favor and drop dead."

            "Why don't you do
us
a favor and drop dead, loser," Shondra intervenes.

            Anya gives her an even more menacing look. "I wasn't talking to you, Shondra, so shut the hell up."

            Shondra's mouth gapes open. "Uh, excuse me?"

            "You heard what I said, dumbass!"

            "Don't talk to my friend that way, Anya," Carly says, giving her a hard shove.

            Anya stumbles over her feet, but fortunately regains her stability. She lunges at Carly, but Shondra, thinking swiftly, deals Anya a blow to her stomach with her foot. Anya feels as if all the air in her body has been sucked out by a vacuum cleaner. She falls on the cold, frost-laden grass, gasping for air and gripping her hurting stomach. She then feels the back of her neck crack as her head is jerked back ruthlessly by Carly tugging down on her long ponytail.

            "Carly stop! Leave me alone," she wants to scream, but she is still too short of breath to do so. Her eyes widen when she sees Shondra and Kirsten tower over her, each holding onto a heavy weight, presumably Matt's weights. Anya tries to lift herself up off the ground, but she can't move. A severe pain shoots from the base of her neck to her temples. Her heart pounds so hard against her chest, it feels like it is about to explode. She opens her mouth to scream, but still no sound comes out.
There has to be people nearby who can see this happening. Oh, please someone help me.
She watches Shondra and Kirsten hand over the weights to Carly, who is the one pinning Anya to the ground. The next thing she knows, Carly is standing over her, smiling acidly down on her.