Triple Jeopardy (17 page)

Not if I can help it. It depends partly on you. You stay put, right here. Im going down and get them. Your wifes asleep in the bedroom. If I find when I get back that youve gone and started chatting with her Ill either slap you down with your own gun or phone the police, I dont know which, maybe both. Stay put.

This is my house, Goodwin, and -

Goddam it, dont you know a raving maniac when you see one'I tapped my chest with a forefinger. Me. When Im as sore as I am now the safest thing would be for you to call a cop. I want my gun.

As I made for the door he was reaching for the bottle. By the time I got down to the ground floor I had myself well enough in hand to speak to them without betraying any special urgency, telling them that Koven was ready for them upstairs, for the conference. I found Pat Lowell still at the desk in the room in front and Hildebrand and Jordan still at their drawing tables in the workroom. I even replied appropriately when Pat Lowell asked how I had made out with the coconut. As Hildebrand and Jordan left their tables and turned off their radios I had a keener eye on them than before; someone here had swiped my gun. As we ascended the first flight of stairs, with me in the rear, I asked their backs where I would find Adrian Getz.

Pat Lowell answered. He may be in his room on the top floor. They halted at the landing, the edge of the big square hall, and I joined them. We could hear the radio going upstairs.

She indicated the room to the left. He takes his afternoon nap in there with Rookaloo, but not this late usually.

I thought I might as well glance in, and moved to the archway.

A draft of cold air hit me, and I went on in. A window was wide open! I marched over and closed it, then went to take a look at the monkey. It was huddled on the floor in a corner of the cage, making angry little noises, with something clutched in its fingers against its chest. The light was dim, but I have good eyes, and not only was the something unmistakably a gun, but it was my Marley on a bet. Needing light, and looking for a wall switch, I was passing the large couch which faced the fireplace when suddenly I stopped and froze. Adrian Getz,

the Squirt, was lying on the couch but he wasnt taking a nap. I bent over him for a close-up and saw a hole in his skull northeast of his right ear, and some red juice. I stuck a hand inside the V of his vest and flattened it against him and held my breath for eight seconds. He was through taking naps.

I straightened up and called, Come in here, all three of you, and switch on a light as you come!

They appeared through the archway, and one of them put a hand to the wall.

Lights shone. The back of the couch hid Getz from their view as they approached.

Its cold in here, Pat Lowell was saying. Did you open another -

Seeing Getz stopped her, and the others too. They goggled.

Dont touch him, I warned them. Hes dead, so you cant help him any. Dont touch anything. You three stay here together, right here in this room, while I -

Christ Almighty, Pete Jordan blurted. Hildebrand squeaked something. Pat Lowell put out a hand, found the couch back, and gripped it. She asked something, but I wasnt listening. I was at the cage, with my back to them,

peering at the monkey. It was my Marley the monkey was clutching. I had to curl my fingers until the nails sank in to keep from opening the cage door and grabbing that gun.

I whirled. Stick here together. Understand'I was on my way. Im going up and phone.

Ignoring their noises, I left them. I mounted the stairs in no hurry, because if I had been a raving maniac before, I was now stiff with fury and I needed a few seconds to get under control. In the room upstairs Harry Koven was still seated at the desk, staring at the open drawer. He looked up and fired a question at me but got no answer. I went to the phone, lifted it, and dialed a number. When I got Wolfe he started to sputter at being disturbed again.

Im sorry, I told him, but I wish to report that I have found my gun. Its in the cage with the monkey, who is -

What monkey'

Its name is Rookaloo, but please dont interrupt. It is holding my gun to its breast, I suspect because it is cold and the gun is warm, having recently been fired. Lying there on a couch is the body of a man, Adrian Getz, with a bullet hole in the head. It is no longer a question whether I call a cop, I merely wanted to report the situation to you before I do so. A thousand to one Getz was shot and killed with my gun. I will not be - hold it -

I dropped the phone and jumped. Koven had made a dive for the door. I caught him before he reached it, got an arm and his chin, and heaved. There was a lot of feeling in it, and big as he was he sailed to a wall, bounced off, and went to the floor.

I would love to do it again, I said, meaning it, and returned to the phone and told Wolfe, Excuse me, Koven tried to interrupt. I was only going to say I will not be home to dinner.

The man is dead.

Yes, sir.

Have you anything satisfactory for the police'

Sure. My apologies for bringing my gun here to oblige a murderer. Thats all.

We havent answered todays mail.

I know. Its a damn shame. Ill get away as soon as I can.

Very well.

The connection went. I held the button down a moment, with an eye on Koven, who was upright again but not asking for an encore, then released it and dialed RE 7-5260.

I havent kept anything like an accurate score, but I would say that over the years I havent told the cops more than a couple of dozen barefaced lies, maybe not that many. They are seldom practical. On the other hand, I cant recall any murder case Wolfe and I were in on and Ive had my story gone into at length where I have simply opened the bag and given them all I had, with no dodging and no withholding, except one, and this is it. On the murder of Adrian Getz I didnt have a single thing on my mind that I wasnt willing and eager to shovel out, so I let them have it.

It worked fine. They called me a liar.

Not right away, of course. At first even Inspector Cramer appreciated my cooperation, knowing as he did that there wasnt a man in his army who could shade me at seeing and hearing, remembering, and reporting. It was generously conceded that upon finding the body I had performed properly and promptly,

herding the trio into the room and keeping the Kovens from holding a family council until the law arrived.

From there on, of course, everyone had been under surveillance, including me.

At six-thirty, when the scientists were still monopolizing the room where Getz had got it, and city employees were wandering all over the place, and the various inmates were still in various rooms conversing privately with Homicide men, and I had typed and signed my own frank and full statement,

I was confidently expecting that I would soon be out on the sidewalk unattended,

flagging a taxi. I was in the front room on the ground floor, seated at Pat Lowells desk, having used her typewriter, and Sergeant Purley Stebbins was sitting across from me, looking over my statement.

He lifted his head and regarded me, perfectly friendly. A perfectly friendly look from Stebbins would, from almost anyone else, cause you to get your guard up and be ready to either duck or counter, but Purley wasnt responsible for the design of his big bony face and his pig-bristle eyebrows.

I guess you got it all in, he admitted. As you told it.

I suggest, I said modestly, that when this case is put away you send that to the school to be used as a model report.

Yeah. He stood up. Youre a good typist. He turned to arose too, saying casually, I can run along now'

The door opened, and Inspector Cramer entered. I didnt like his expression as he darted a glance at me. Knowing him well in all his moods, I didnt like the way his broad shoulders were hunched, or his clamped jaw, or the glint in his eye.

Heres Goodwins statement, Purley said. Okay.

As he told it'

Yes.

Send him downtown and hold him.

It caught me completely off balance. Hold me'I demanded, squeaking almost like Hildebrand.

Yes, sir. Nothing could catch Purley off balance. On your order'

No, charge him. Sullivan Act. He has no license for the gun we found on him.

Ha, ha, I said. Ha, ha, and ha, ha. There, you got your laugh. A very fine gag. Ha.

Youre going down, Goodwin. Ill be down to see you later.

As I said, I knew him well. He meant it. I had his eyes.

This, I said, is way out of my reach. Ive told you where and how and why I got that gun. I pointed to the paper in Purleys hand. Read it. Its all down,

punctuated.

You had the gun in your holster and you have no license for it.

Nuts. But I get it. Youve been hoping for years to hang something on Nero Wolfe, and to you Im just a part of him, and you think heres your chance. Of course it wont stick. Wouldnt you rather have something that will'Like resisting arrest and assaulting an officer'Glad to oblige. Watch it -

Tipping forward, I started a left hook for his jaw, fast and vicious, then jerked it down and went back on my heels. It didnt create a panic, but I had the satisfaction of seeing Cramer take a quick step back and Stebbins one forward.

They bumped.

There, I said. With both of you to swear to it, that ought to be good for at least two years. Ill throw the typewriter at you if youll promise to catch it.

Cut the clowning, Purley growled.

You lied about that gun, Cramer snapped. If you dont want to get taken down to think it over, think now. Tell me what you came here for and what happened.

Ive told you.

A string of lies.

No, sir.

You can have em back. Im not trying to hang something on Wolfe, or you either. I want to know why you came here and what happened.

Oh, for Gods sake. I moved my eyes. Okay, Purley, wheres my escort'

Cramer strode four paces to the door, opened it, and called, Bring Mr. Koven in here!

Harry Koven entered with a dick at his elbow. He looked as if he was even farther away from happiness than before.

Well sit down, Cramer said.

He left me behind the desk. Purley and the dick took chairs in the background.

Cramer stationed himself across the desk from me, where Purley had been, with Koven on a chair at his left. He opened up.

I told you, Mr. Koven, that I would ask you to repeat your story in Goodwins presence, and you said you would.

Koven nodded. Thats right. He was hoarse.

We wont need all the details. Just answer me briefly. When you called on Nero Wolfe last Saturday evening, what did you ask him to do'

I told him I was going to have Dazzle Dan start a detective agency in a new series. The hoarseness bothered Koven, and he cleared his throat explosively.

I told him I needed technical assistance, and possibly a tie-up, if we could arrange -

There was a pad of ruled paper on the desk. I reached for it, and a pencil, and started doing shorthand. Cramer leaned over, stretched an arm, grabbed a corner of the pad, and jerked it away. I could feel the blood coming to my head, which was silly of it with an inspector, a sergeant, and a private all in the room.

We need your full attention, Cramer growled. He went to Koven. Did you say anything to Wolfe about your gun being taken from your desk'

Certainly not. It hadnt been taken. I did mention that I had a gun in my desk for which I had no license, but that I never carried it, and I asked if that was risky. I told them what make it was, a Marley thirty-two. I asked how much trouble it would be to get a license, and if -

Well keep it brief. Just cover the points. What arrangement did you make with Wolfe'

He agreed to send Goodwin to my place on Monday for a conference with my staff and me.

About what'

About the technical problems of having Dazzle Dan do detective work, and possibly a tie-up.

And Goodwin came'

Yes, today around noon. Kovens hoarseness kept interfering with him, and he kept clearing his throat. My eyes were at his face, but he hadnt met them. Of course he was talking to Cramer and had to be polite. He went on, The conference was for twelve-thirty, but I had a little talk with Goodwin and asked him to wait. I have to be careful what I do with Dan and I wanted to think it over some more. Anyway Im like that, I put things off. It was after four oclock when he -

Was your talk with Goodwin about your gun being gone'

Certainly not. We might have mentioned the gun, about my not having a license for it, I dont remember - no, wait a minute, we must have, because I pulled the drawer open and we glanced in at it. Except for that, we only talked -

Did you or Goodwin take your gun out of the drawer'

No. Absolutely not.

Did he put his gun in the drawer'

Absolutely not.

I slid in, When I took my gun from my holster to show it to you, did you -

Nothing doing, Cramer snapped at me. Youre listening. Just the high spots for now. He returned to Koven. Did you have another talk with Goodwin later'

Koven nodded. Yes, around half-past three he came up to my room - the living room. We talked until after four, there and in my office, and then -

In your office did Goodwin open the drawer of the desk and take the gun out and say it had been changed'

Certainly not!

What did he do'

Nothing, only we talked, and then he left to go down and get the others to come up for the conference. After a while he came back alone, and without saying anything he came to the desk and took my gun from the drawer and put it under his coat. Then he went to the phone and called Nero Wolfe. When I heard him tell Wolfe that Adrian Getz had been shot, that he was on a couch downstairs dead, I got up to go down there, and Goodwin jumped me from behind and knocked me out.

When I came to he was still talking to Wolfe, I dont know what he was telling him, and then he called the police. He wouldnt let me -

Hold it, Cramer said curtly. That covers that. One more point. Do you know of any motive for Goodwins wanting to murder Adrian Getz'

No, I dont. I told-