Read Understanding Sexual Attraction Online
Authors: Nicholas Jack
Tags: #Medical Books, #Psychology, #Science & Math, #Health; Fitness & Dieting, #Psychology & Counseling, #Professional & Technical, #Behavioral Sciences, #Professional Science, #Behavioral Psychology, #Sexuality
Chapter 3: Money and Status
Money and Status account for 30% of a woman’s Base Attraction for a man.
Money and status is the excuse most men give for why they can’t get girls. However, as you will see, even if you can’t be on the cover of Forbes Magazine, you can still hit some attraction triggers in this area.
Money
Money is one of the first things that pop into a man's mind when he wonders what would help him get
that special girl and there is some truth to it. Money alone is an attraction trigger, but it's not as big as you might think. Money accounts for almost 9% of a woman’s Base Attraction. That won't do it all for you. So many rich men make the mistake of thinking that women will want them just because of their money. So they get rich and they go out and they wonder why they are getting rejected so often. It is because they are missing the other 91 percent of the things that hit attraction switches in a woman.
The billionaire Mark Zuckerberg who created
Facebook has more money than he could ever spend. So he should be spending his time with supermodels and famous actresses, right? Wrong. He is missing so many other attraction switches that even though he has an out of this world bank account, he isn't landing any high value women.
If you are thinking about getting more money as a way to make women more attracted to you, it will work, but there may be other ways that aren't so time consuming that you can get the same result. If you have tons of money, but it is the only thing you have going for you, then those cute
girls only care about the money. In fact, they are probably not even very attracted to you. After all you only hit one of their attraction switches.
Part of the reason money is such a big switch is because it also comes with the lifestyle. They will dream of traveling the world, riding in fast cars, big houses, and nannies.
You can compensate for money by selling a good lifestyle, one that doesn’t require so much ‘dinero’.
Another
reason for so much attraction to money is the obvious reason of security. Even though today many women can take care of themselves, the show of security is a hardwired attraction switch that girls cannot turn off. You may wonder why you see rich women going after rich men; money is still an attraction switch, even to a girl who doesn’t need it.
Status and Fame
Status and Fame are other
attraction triggers that men believe are more powerful than they really are. It is only 9% of the total base attraction.
I remember meeting a girl from Los Angeles who told
me she once met Seth Green at a club. She said that when she first saw him she became giddy with excitement, but after he came over and talked with her, she realized how many unattractive qualities he had. Seth Green is very famous, but he is lacking many other attraction switches. Don't think that fame and fortune will give you everything. It will give you 9% of what you need, but there is still 91% left to go.
A doctor is one of the most attractive careers that a man can have. They make good money, they are
highly thought of, and they save lives every day. What more could a woman want? Well, many doctors still have trouble finding dates with the girls they think they deserve. They think that because they are a doctor that girls should just swoon over them. Being a doctor is a high status job, but there is still 91% more he needs to have to hit all those attraction switches.
However
, if a high status job is something that you want to do with your life, take the attraction points and keep adding on. Some prestigious careers that offer status are: doctor, CEO, lawyer, pilot, and many more. If you have it, use it.
Another reason status is important is because
it goes along with lifestyle and bragging rights. She may dream of what it’s like attending parties with high status people, and then afterwards she will go brag to her friends about it.
Accomplishments
Another thing that will cause attraction in a woman is hearing about a man's accomplishments. Did he scale Mt. Everest? Travel the world? Go to Harvard? Save someone from a fire? Hearing
, or especially, witnessing an accomplishment will trigger very strong attraction.
Another aspect of accomplishments is ambition. Ambition is very sexy to a woman, even if you only
have a plan become a rock star. As long as she sees it as a possibility, it will still hit an attraction trigger.
Social
The social attraction trigger is much more important than you may think. Women are naturally more social than men, so they place more importance on who you know. In a woman's eyes you
r friends are a part of who you are. So the higher value that your friends are, the higher value that you will seem.
Every woman has dreamed of going to their boyfriend
’s party and running into a political figure or famous actor. If you can't pull that off, just having a large network of friends to set up good sized parties will still hit an attraction switch in women.
On the other hand, if all your friends are low value or you don't have friends at all, this will massively kill attraction. If you are lacking in the friends department
, start a hobby where you can meet other guys or join a club or organization. The easiest is video games, but DO NOT use video games to make friends. Video games are one of the worst ways you can spend your time. The friends you will make playing video games will most likely not be high value friends.
S
ocial attraction triggers only account for about 5% of total Base Attraction. So if you don't want to ditch the friends you have known all your life, don't worry it's just a small part of attraction. Just keep in mind that it won't hurt to make new friends.
Another aspect of social
attraction is how loyal to you your friends are. If you look one way and your friend throws you under the bus, the social attraction that they originally caused the girl to feel for you will not only vanish, but it will kill even more attraction. However, if your friends are always talking you up as a person, it will cause a lot of attraction. Friends are important to women, so remember, if your friends aren't loyal, they won’t do anything but hurt the attraction a woman will feel for you.
Potential
All of us have potential to do many of these things. If you can show that you have a good chance of making these things happen in the future
, it will cause her to have attraction for you.
If you are still studying you may hit some of these triggers with your degree choice, or even
with the fact that you are pursuing a degree. Be ambitious in life, it will pay off in many ways.
How to Use Money and Status to Create Sexual Attraction
Money and Status are things that you NEVER want to brag about. If you brag about them they will, at best, do nothing and, at worst, kill attraction. If you are bragging about having money you will only attract gold diggers, who aren't really interested in you.
The best way to show that you have money is in your clothing. If you have money, use on it expensive brand name clothing. Women will notice and it will create attraction. Drive your expensive car
around town, but don't go out of your way to make sure that the girl notices it; she will pick up on this "try-hard" behavior.
The best way
for a girl to learn about your money, status and accomplishments is actually through somebody else. If she hears it through somebody else it will seem much more credible, and you will be seen even better as you are not going around bragging about it. If she asks you about your career you can also tell her, but don't bring it up yourself.
If you there is no other way for her to know of your status or your accomplishments than to hear it from you, then you should hint to it in stor
ies. You can tell a funny story and just mention in small details things about what you are trying to tell her. For example, "Today the funniest thing happened; one of my patients was blah blah blah." She will immediately ask "Oh, you're a doctor?" You disguised your bragging with a humorous story. You can use this tactic with anything having to do with Money and Status.
Chapter 4: Personality Attributes
Personality a
ttributes account for 32% of the total Base Attraction that a woman feels for a man. These are the characteristics about yourself that you can most easily improve. After all, these things are all controlled by your brain and you have control over that. We are creatures of habit so repetition can help you to gain any of the following attributes.
Confidence
Confidence is the most important personality attribute that you can have. It alone will create 6% of total Base Attraction. Not only that, but confidence is part of the majority of other personality attributes, so it is difficult to measure.
Confidence could help to contribute to over 20% of total Base Attraction, so take it very seriously.
Women are attracted to confidence because it relays a lot of messages. It tells her that you are not a
fraid to go get what you want, which is exactly how a provider should be. It tells her that you have probably had success in your life, which is also what a provider should be. Confidence hits an attraction switch as old as man itself.
If you want to build confidence there are a number of ways. The first thing you should do is take a look at your insecurities. Accept them, and understand there is so much more to a person. Look at Tom Cruise. Even in his latter years he is still considered one of the most attractive men around. The man is tiny, about 5'7. The reason he is so successful is because he understands that he is short, but that he has other good qualities. Face your faults, and accept them as every single per
son on this earth has them. The real reason Tom Cruise is so famous is because of his unwavering confidence.
Another way to gain confidence is to surround yourself with confident people. They say you are the personality of your five closest friends. That saying has a lot of truth. If you can't surround yourself with confident people, start watching movies and TV shows with confident actors and model yourself after them. This will start to wear off on you subconsciously the more that you do it. Look at them as a father type figure. This will cause you to accept all they are doing both consciously and subconsciously and it is the reason sons are so much like their fathers.
After that, fake it until you make it. When people are kidnapped, one thing their captors will do is use psychology to get their prisoners to like them. They will force the captives to pretend they like their captors. After pretending for a while, the captives will actually start to like them. Once you pretend to be something for so long, you can't help but be it.
This is how you should think if you want to be a confident person. "You are confident in what you say, confident in what you know, confident in what you do, and confident that you can get what you want."
If you want to improve your confidence, memorize that sentence or write it down and think about it every day.
If you understand people for what they a
re, and look at the big picture, there is no reason you can't be the most confident person in the world. If tiny Tom Cruise can do it, so can you.
Desired by Women
The second
most important personality trait that you can have is that you are desired by women, or to be known for being good with women. This, in itself, is an attraction trigger. The prettier the women that are attracted to you, the more attraction other women will feel from it. This attribute accounts for 4% of total Base Attraction. It may not seem like a lot, but remember that the average guy will only create 0 to 5% attraction with a woman. With this alone you can do what an average man can do with 30 times more attributes.
For example
, if you are talking to a girl and your ex-girlfriend walks up to you to say hello. Your ex is an absolute stunner. When your ex leaves, the girl you were talking to will look at you and feel much more attraction than she felt before your ex walked up. She went from not knowing if you were desired by women, to knowing that you are desired by the prettiest women. This will skyrocket your status.
Another way to show this to girls is to have a picture with an attractive ex in your phone. As you are flipping through the pictures, go past it. Don't linger on it. Just spend enough time so that she sees you with an attractive girl.
Remember if you are bragging that the attraction will not work nearly as well, so you need to disguise it. You can also have a friend mention your ex model girlfriend in a conversation. Any way you can let it be known. Do it.
The reason women are attracted to men who other women are attracted to is because subconsciously it tells them that your children will probably be able to do the same thing. Since the biological point of human bei
ngs is to survive and reproduce and your children, like you, will be much more effective at reproducing, she will want her children to share your DNA. Remember this is all subconscious. These thoughts may not breach her conscious mind, but they will be there.
Intelligence
There are many very smart guys that believe that women don't find intelligence sexy. They are wrong. Women do find it sexy, very sexy in fact. However if it is the only attribute that you have, it will only account for 2% of total Base Attraction. If you have nothing killing your attraction then it will only put you
in the same boat with average men, and that is not where you want to be. You want to couple intelligence with other traits to make yourself more attractive.
When talking with girls it is actually an attractive thing if you talk more sophisticated. However
, don't overdo it. If you are talking to a valley girl, the smart thing to do would be to talk at her level. Mentioning your prestigious university in a story is another way to help hit this attraction switch.
An
aspect that goes along with intelligence is experience. When you have all these experiences, you will come off as being wise or intelligent. When you are experienced in a subject it will hit part of this attraction trigger.
The reason intelligence is so attractive is because of the obvious benefits
in your career, especially in today’s society. Intelligence means you will better be able to care for her, and to support her and her children. Intelligence is becoming more and more valuable in today’s society. It should cause more attraction than it does, however, for thousands and thousands of years it meant a lot less in terms of being able to support a family. Other factors, like strength, were more important.
Identity
Identity is knowing who you are. It is a sort of confidence, but it is more. Identity is finding your pla
ce in the world and perusing it. Identity is having a purpose to your life, a purpose that is unwavering.
This is a very deep personality trait and it is something that is very hard to fake. Sometimes it takes some soul searching to obtain this trait. There is not one way I could tell you so that you can find your identity, you have to find that yourself. The only advice I can tell you is to step out of your comfort zone, it's the only way to learn anything about yourself.
The reason women find it so attractive is because it is something most of them are trying to find themselves. If you have this quality, they will hope that it will rub off on them. Even if women already have this quality, they will like that you have it as well.
Leader
Being a leader is something I think all
men are born wanting, they just don't all have the tools to do it. Whether it is leading a sports team, a company, or a group of friends, women will find this quality attractive.
Becoming a leader is mostly done with ambition and body language. Having the skills
of a craft and ambition to lead is only part of the battle, you need other attributes. In professional sports there are star athletes that their team mates look to for leadership; however, some of these athletes are not born leaders. Some have learned because they had to, and some still aren't good leaders. The only thing these players naturally lack is body language. Something I will touch on a bit later, and something I will dive deeply into in my next book. Body language is the only thing these players are missing, the only thing they need to be the leaders their teammates expect.
You can also be a leader in your interaction with women. You can lead the conversation around, talking about the things that you want.
Women love talking, but there are many topics that will put them to sleep, so before leading the conversation around make sure it is towards something that will interest them. If you understand this, don't let her steer and lead the conversation around. Leading the conversation will make her subconsciously get the impression that you are a leader type.
An interesting group dynamic that happens is w
hen there is a group of people and somebody makes a joke; the group will naturally look to the leader to laugh before laughing themselves. If you become a leader, women will know because of all the little things that will come out in a groups’ body language. You don’t even need to try to show it.
The reason women a
re attracted to a leader is because for thousands of years being a leader meant that you would have the resources of all the people you led. Being the partner of such a person has obvious advantages for the girl, and for her children. Even today people who are leaders are much more likely to be successful. Being a leader, or owner of a company, means that you will make part of the profits of all your employees. Women subconsciously know these things.
Dangerous
Most people have noticed women’
s attraction to a man who is dangerous. Famous serious serial killers get tens of thousands of letters from women who are obsessed with them. Men getting right out of prison have little trouble finding a girl to end the previous years they spent without sex.
If you want to
obtain this trait I would not suggest killing anybody, or doing something that will get you landed in prison. If you will break any laws at all, stick to the minor ones. The best idea is to just have a dangerous look. Just the confidence in knowing that you can kill somebody, if you needed to, will come off as the dangerous attribute. You can get this confidence by taking martial arts classes. This confidence will be even better because it will not cause her to use common sense and stay away from you out of self-preservation.
Some more ways
to seem dangerous are mentioning a past fight that you were in, or when you spent a night in jail for something. Be careful because you have to walk a fine line between being dangerous and too dangerous.
It is not clear why women find this so attractive. It could be the excitement that comes with it, or the fact that dangerous people are usually have Alpha type personalities
, and an Alpha type personality has some of the other personality attributes of sexual attraction. Whatever it is, it is clear that women have a sexual attraction for dangerous men. Even when a woman uses their common sense to suppress their feelings, it still doesn’t mean they don’t feel that attraction.
Mysterious
We have all seen these types in the movies. They won't talk much about themselves or their pasts, and they possess uncanny abilities
that make you wonder about who they are.
The
best way to come off mysterious is to dodge questions like what you do, and where are you from. You can reply with a funny answer, or you can say something like "It's not important." and change the subject. Being mysterious is even more powerful when coupled with body language, which I will be discussing in my next book.
The reason being mysterious is so attractive is because you could be anything. Her imagination will come up with things that you could be. She may wonder if you are a spy or a billionaire hei
r trying to get away from your day to day responsibilities. Both are realistically ridiculous but being mysterious opens up these exciting possibilities in a woman's mind that she has dreamed about since she was a child.
Mystery plays off of curiosity
, which is natural psychological behavior. There is also an entire genre of books and movies that play off of the enjoyment that people get from mystery.
Adventurous
The adventurous
man lives a life of excitement; just by being around him, a woman leaves her boring world and enters one of excitement. An adventurer offers a woman a release from her day to day life. He can also find adventure in everyday things.