Authors: Erica Chilson
“H
ow did you retaliate?” Curiosity gets the better of me.
“
Katya,” Ezra seriously says. “You’re not going to like what I have to tell you. I hope you don’t hate me for it.” He stares at me for the longest time, and then abruptly takes a fortifying breath. “Every time our master took Cort’s mouth, I took something from him- every time. This needs out in the open, especially because you agreed to become my wife. This person isn’t my lover, but I’m with them every time
he
takes Cort’s mouth.”
I fall into the dining chair because my legs won’t hold my weig
ht. I can’t judge Ezra because I just got done finger-fucking Monica in our bathroom. It’s the look of shame on Ezra’s face that weakens my knees. I don’t feel shame when I touch someone else and I don’t want him to, either.
“How does this hurt him and why do you want to hurt him?”
I numbly ask.
“
Because this person is the love of his life and I could. He was taking something from me, so I took something from him. It was exciting and fun- a real thrill when I feel off kilter most of the time. Because I love him more than life itself, and he betrayed my trust by touching Cort. I’d tattoo my name in block letter across Cort’s forehead if I could, just so that when he took Cort’s mouth, all he would see is my name. It doesn’t bother me anymore, because I see that he holds a different kind of love for Cort than he does for me.”
Ezra deeply sighs while I sit in stunned silence.
“I keep going after his lover because I’m ashamed of myself, and I’m punishing all of us. I don’t mean to punish his partner, but at the same time, I’m jealous of them, too. I’m a psychologist and I can’t even explain it.” Ezra’s voice is hollow and he’s as white as a sheet. If he was bragging, I’d kick his ass. But being distraught doesn’t cover Ezra’s dominant temperament.
“This is the Master of the U
niverse everyone is talking about, right?” I ask, putting the pieces together.
“Yes,” Ezra shame
fully mutters. “Just so we’re clear, you do understood what I just told you, right?”
“That your m
aster has an intimate relationship with your partner, so you screw his in retaliation. I get it, Ezra. You’re having sex with someone. I even know who it is. I won’t tell anyone. I promise. I’m not mad. But I’m upset that this pathology runs so deep for you all. I get that it’s not about me. I’m not telling you to stop, but you need to fix it.”
I grab Ezra’s
hand across the table to make a connection between us. I don’t want him spiraling down where he can self-punish and play the martyr. Martyr and victim are too close for my tastes. I don’t ever want to see Ezra as a victim. The thought makes my stomach heave. I want him to deal and move on and call himself a survivor like Cort and I do.
“I’m trying
,” Ezra practically whines. “I haven’t been with them since you arrived, and I don’t plan on it. I want you to know that. I’m ashamed of what I’ve done. I used to be really bad, but I’ve hid it very well. Cort doesn’t even know half the shit I’ve done. Only our master and his partner and a friend of ours knows the real me. I used to be really, really, bad,” he stresses.
“So I’ve heard,” I tease Ezra
because you can’t punish someone who is already punishing themselves. “I’ve heard a lot of different stuff,” I stress. “Mental health issues, betrayal and lies, and all around bad behavior. Why do you do it?”
“I… I can’t help myself,” Ezra says, humorlessly laughing. “That sounds really lame, doesn’t it? I do have issues of the multiple personality kind. But right now, I have it firmly in check. You’ve noticed, I’m sure. Master Ez is a part of me, as is another I call Ezra. He is a younger version of me while Master Ez is the stronger version of me. When I’m not even, I do very bad things.”
“Wow,” I breathlessly say, at a loss for words. “And that’s why you became a psychologist.”
Ezra simply says, “Yes.”
“So when you get stressed, the issue gets exasperated?” Ezra nods his head yes. “Then shouldn’t you alleviate the stress?” I say the obvious.
“Yeah, I’m working on it. It’s… it’s getting a lot better. Now if I could just get Cortez to forgive all the shit I’ve committed…” Ezra hides his head in his hands.
“What you need to do is to make love to Cort. You both need it, and it would be hard to deny your feelings. I know, trust me. It’s what happened to me when I was with you both.
“Cort will say no,” Ezra grumbles
, but I see hope flare in his eyes. I give him a reassuring grin. I already have a plan set into motion. It’s either their way or mine, but they will get over there shit.
“I saw Ray
at the bakery today,” I nonchalantly say as if it wasn’t life-shattering news. Ezra immediately stops what he’s doing and freezes mid-movement. I give Ezra a play-by-play of the entire conversation I had with his diabolical birth father. I even tell him my theories and that I think Ray is being honest. Like a switch being flipped, Ezra unfreezes.
“Come- I need to
check on Ava and see if she’s sleeping peacefully. You go get Cort from his writing session. I just want to lie in bed and cuddle. I need to know everyone is safe.”
“Oka
y,” I say, and I do as Ezra says by feeding into his OCD issues. I actually agree with him on this. I just want to wrap myself in the warmth of my Ezes, swaddled in blankets that smell like a combination of our scents- home.
Chapter Twenty-Two
I nervously finger the
purple bow topping the large garment box lying on our bed. The note says:
wear this for your final. Congratulations, Kitty Kat, we are proud of you.
I worry my bottom lip as I stare at the gift. I should feel reassured by their confidence in me, yet it worries me. What if I fail? What if I disappoint them b
oth in front of all the masters? It feels premature to say congratulations if I haven’t passed my final test.
I pull the top off the box with a smirk on my lips. I remember the feeling of when I opened the hedonistic chess set at my desk while Ezra looked on. What an embarrassing moment- exciting. Behind the purple
tissue paper lies a soft, black leather outfit. I pull it from the box and marvel at the size of the catsuit. There is no way my body will fit into this without being greased up like a spring pig.
“Do you like it?” Ezra
asks as he pads into the room.
“I feel like you’re making this
a bigger deal than it is,” I say over my shoulder as I stroke the buttery rawhide.
“It is a big deal. I never expected you to go to Dexter and as
k for training. You had asked not knowing what you were actually doing.” Ezra bends down and kisses the tattoo on the nape of my neck.
“What do you mean?”
My voice betrays my confusion.
“You ina
dvertently trained to become a Mistress or Master of Restraint. Yeah, there are a lot of poseurs running around, saying they are dominants or masters. You have to be trained to get the capital letter on the name. Those plaques on the private rooms signify the masters that run Restraint. Tonight, Restraint’s masters along with the top master in the state will decide whether or not you get a capitol M on mistress or a capitol D on domme.”
“Well, fuck,
” I draw out, “no pressure there.” I drop the catsuit and face Ezra. “I guess that’s why you didn’t tell me why this was a big deal until now.” He barks a laugh at the irritated expression on my face. “So I could’ve just had you or Cort train me, and it wouldn’t have made a difference?”
“Nah- we’re good, but we’re not
that
good.” Ezra forcefully shoves me onto our bed. “You, my dear Kitty Kat, managed to ask one of the only two masters in the state to train you. I was impressed with your ingenuity. It’s an honor to be trained. There is a very long waiting list. Good thing Dexter is sweet on you.” Ezra winks.
“I didn’t
do it on purpose. I didn’t know,” I whine.
“I know,
” Ezra purrs, “that’s what makes it so fabulous.”
“So if I fail,
I’ll not only disappoint you and Cort, but Dexter as well. He’ll look bad in front of the others. Dexter’s master be there, too? Will the notorious Master of the Universe be there too?”
“Dexter’s m
aster is the big guy for the state, who just so happens to be the notorious Master of the Universe,” Ezra makes
master
sound ominous as he evilly laughs. “He’s the master to all of us. I’m sure he would have trained you if you’d asked nicely.” Ezra smirks at his inside joke. No matter how many ways I ask or different manipulations I employ, no one will tell me who this guy is.
“
I don’t even know who this master is,” I grump out. “How the hell was I supposed to ask nicely?” I try to stand up, and Ez pushes me back on the bed again.
“I can’t wait for you to meet him.” Ezra winks at me again and chuckles. “I think I will need to
help you get into your new catsuit.”
“Ya better go fetch the butter because I doubt this is going to fit me.” I hold th
e garment up in demonstration. Ez pushes me back on the bed and grabs a hold of my pant leg and roughly pulls. “Hey,” I screech as I try to hold my lounge pants on. One ass cheek is already exposed. “Stop it,” I say as Ezra continues to yank at my clothing. I flail and kick my feet.
“
Fighting only makes it hotter, Kitty Kat,” Ezra salaciously purrs, arousal thick in his voice. “You know I love to catch you.” His comment causes me to hesitate. “I win,” he says as he whips my pants around his head like a flag.
“Asshole,”
I mutter under my breath.
“I heard that, twit!” I receive a sharp swat to the bottom of my foot. I try to rub the owie away, but I’m flip
ped over onto my tummy. One… two… three… swats to my ass, and I’m in flames.
“Fuck, that burns like hell,” I yelp as I twist around on the bed
, trying to gain access to my aching behind.
“Apologize for calling me an asshole, Katya. And say thank you fo
r the present. You’re being very rude to me.” Ezra pouts out his full, bottom lip and I can’t help but laugh. I’m also shocked to note that his Master Ez voice doesn’t make an appearance. He is playing and disciplining me and he’s still wholly Ezra.
I kneel on the bed li
ke a good subservient. I glorify in the fact that Ezra’s eyes widen when I’m on full display, thanks to my lack of pants. “I thank you for the gift of clothing for this evening. I appreciate that you want your pet to look fabulous in front of your fellow masters. I deeply apologize for disrespecting you by calling you an asshole.” The
even though you acted like one
goes without saying. Ezra squints at me when he catches my hidden meaning.
“I thank you for showing
me the error of my ways by punishing me so promptly. Master, would you be so kind to help me into my fine leathers?” Every word is thickly tinged with sarcasm.
I bat my eyelashes at Ezra
and give him a shy smile. I can act the part of a submissive, even though we both know it’s an act. I didn’t mean any of what I just said. And I never said I wouldn’t do it again. If Ezra wants a true submissive, he can go play with Kayla. Cortez and I only bow to Ezra out of respect. I wouldn’t be on my way to my dominant final if I were a true submissive.
“Ah- Kitty Kat, you’
re a fucking menace. You may be a good actress, but I can see through you like a windowpane. I want to beat the shit out of you this very moment. You’re just begging for a beating. I can’t and you know it. You’ve backed me into a corner. Ya better hope my mood changes before the end of the night or you’re in for it big time.” Ezra’s nimble fingers clasp my ankle in an iron grip and yank.
I try to flee and I’m reward
ed with another swat. “Bad Kat,” Ezra hisses. I will make Ezra earn the right to punish me. I manage to get away from him again and kneel near the headboard.
“Please, s
ir, may I please have another?” I say in mock seriousness. It takes everything in me not to burst out laughing, but that is until I hear Ezra growl from deep within his chest like a wild animal. I scurry away as fast as I can, heart beating erratically.
“How about five,” Master Ez’s smoky voice purrs in my ear when he catches me.
I’m flung face first at the foot of the bed. Most of my body is hanging off the edge. Ezra bundles my ankles in one of his hands. I try to crawl away and he quickly yanks me back.
A harsh swat has me hissing
out a pained breath. It wasn’t his hand. I slowly look back over my shoulder, like in a horror film when you have to look, but you’re not really sure you want to. Ezra waves a cane in the air while wearing a wicked smirk. His eyes twinkle with mischief. I’m in for it now. I renew my efforts at fleeing, struggling to get away.