Users (22 page)

“Step back to the red line.” Once we were resettled, Jensen explained, “When you hear the horn blast, you must kill the animal as quickly as possible. This is a timed test.”

I slumped my shoulders, shook my head and said to Wesley, “It’s never going to end, is it.” Then I looked at Cael. He was leaning forward with his elbows on his knees, scanning our line and rubbing the back of his neck with one hand. Beside him, Shayla looked horrified, and Brian had a hand over his mouth.

I looked at my bunny, Wesley’s dog, and Pippa’s kitten. The animals probably really were dying, but had Jensen deliberately made them sick in order to convince us to kill them? Had he already experimented on them?

The horn sounded and I jolted. Pippa whined about how she couldn’t kill a kitten. Then whimpers and howls filled my ears, and my attention was drawn to everyone else’s animals. The guy beside Wesley had already killed his puppy – the animal was staring sightlessly into the distance. I couldn’t tell how he’d killed it. Beside him, the girl who had insulted us at breakfast had a pot-bellied pig. It was screaming and running its head into the bars of its cage. Its snout got stuck, and it frantically wriggled around, causing itself to bleed. One of the blue guy’s animals was vomiting again and again. A gray’s cat was stumbling drunkenly. It was difficult to tell what mode of death was being used on other animals; some cries had ceased, others had grown shriller.

“Time!” Jensen called over the intercom. “Remain in your positions while the technicians check your animals.”

The door on the left swung open again, and the line of technicians filed out. The people who had dropped the cages off were the ones to check the animals’ status. Some of the them stood, faced the window, and held one arm high in the air – I counted three. Some technicians stood with their right arms straight out in front of them, parallel with the ground; I counted six of them. Others faced the window with both arms at their sides. That’s what my bunny’s technician did.

Jensen looked angry. “Only nine out of fourteen of you even tried to spare the animals from suffering. And only three animals are actually dead. This is a failed experiment! The technicians will replace all the animals with new ones and you will do the same thing again. If even one of you refuses to at least
try
to kill your animal, all the dead and injured ones will be replaced over and over until everyone tries. In other words, more animals will suffer. It's your choice.”

Less than a minute later, they brought in another set of animals. I squeezed my eyes shut. I heard Wesley say, “Iggy. You’re going to have to kill that rabbit. It’s got two huge tumors. It’s dying anyway. Give it a quick death.”

I turned to see his jaw was tight with tension, and his eyes bored into me as if he could will me into compliance. When he squeezed my hand, I knew I would kill the rabbit. I wanted to be strong for him. “Okay.”

The horn sounded. Wesley’s dog circled its cage repeatedly and then fell over, and I knew it was suffocating. I looked at the rabbit before me and stopped its heart. It was dead in seconds.

Pippa started crying, her squeals blending in with those of the animals. Some of the students were trying to do as told, but they weren’t able to kill quickly enough, and their animals were suffering. A purple girl’s cat was lying in a pool of blood. Ibram’s rabbit appeared to being having a seizure, and then it stilled.

Pippa began sobbing loudly. A pig squealed and snorted. I flattened my palms over my ears and turned my back to the line of animals, waiting.

“Time!” Jensen finally called. “The technicians will now check your animals.”

I turned back around. My technician stood with her right arm raised high. So did Wesley’s. But not Pippa’s.

Jensen said, “Twelve attempts. Six deaths. Twelve animals will be replaced.”

While the switch commenced, Wesley leaned around me and told Pippa, “You have to kill your animal. It’s dying. And more animals are suffering because of you.”

How many animals did they have back there? I wondered what they were doing with the ones injured in our experiment. Would they euthanize them? Study them? Surely the scientists didn’t keep them alive while they suffered. I wanted to look at Cael, but I just couldn’t. I didn’t want to see disappointment in his eyes. I turned to Pippa. “He’s right. If we all kill our sick animals this round, it’s over. The test is over.”

After the new cages were in place, Jensen changed the rules. “The time for this round of testing has been extended indefinitely until all animals are dead.”

The horn blasted.

I killed my lame dog instantly and then I watched the others, needing them to do the same. There was too much crying. Too much pain. These animals should have been children’s pets, not experimental objects.

But they weren’t dying like I expected them to. They were suffering. As time passed, only six of us had put our animals down. The other students were only causing pain and screaming. Pippa’s face was buried in her hands while her tabby cat licked its paw.

“Pippa!” I shouted, but she shook her head.

Pigs squealed. Dogs yelped. Cats howled. How long did it take for the agony to stop! None of the blue-uniformed students’ animals had died yet. One of the dogs was convulsing and dry heaving. A cat had a lump on its neck that was growing larger and larger, strangling it.

I couldn’t take it anymore!

I killed all four of the blue’s animals with a quick glance. Pippa’s kitten fell over dead. I stepped out of line and ran to stand behind the grays, stopping the suffering in less than five seconds.

And then it was finally quiet.

Fourteen animals dead; I had killed eight of them. I bit my lip and drew blood to hold back the tears. It was just like before. More death. More suffering. I told myself I had saved these pets, but I was still disgusted with myself.

“Time,” Jensen called in a less enthusiastic voice. “The technicians will check your animals.”

I trudged back to my place on the red line, waiting for the results while Pippa hiccuped and trembled. Hand after hand went up. And when I finally counted fourteen hands lifted high, I sat down, pulled my knees into my chest, and buried my face in my arms.

Jensen told us, “All fourteen animals are dead. The test is concluded. Until you receive further instruction, you may have free time, which means you may enter any room with an open door.”

Someone kicked my foot. I looked up at the girl from breakfast. “If I were Jensen, I’d say you cheated. You should be punished for that.”

A tall guy with a crew cut and purple scrubs said, “Leave her alone, Alex. Can’t you tell she’s emotional right now?”

“Emotional? Brodie, she’s a total pussy.”

“Piss off,” Wesley snapped at her.

Alex passed by Pippa and spat out, “Cry baby.” And then I heard the two of them discuss how easy the test had been. I was so glad when their voices faded away.

Wesley squatted down and tugged on my arm. “Come on, Iggy. Get up.”

Tanned arms appeared in front of me as someone else squatted down. I turned my head to find Ibram offering to help me up. He was dark-skinned, with thick, wavy black hair and black eyes. Tall and broadly built, he might have been intimidating if it wasn’t for the baby face and dimples. I put my hand in his and let him pull me to my feet.

He said, “Alex is full of shit. Jensen’s rule was all animals dead. He didn’t specify who should kill them. I think you did the right thing.”

I offered him a lopsided smile, and then Shayla appeared beside him and his attention was drawn to her. Just as I questioned where Cael was, I felt someone tap my shoulder and turned around to throw myself into his arms. He was big and warm, and for just a few seconds, I allowed myself to feel safe. Even if I hated what I’d just done, I was pretty sure Cael wouldn’t think badly of me. I had already told him about the animals I’d had to kill before, and I was sure he understood I had no choice.

“Iggy,” he murmured in my ear. “I’m so sorry.” After holding me a few moments longer, he grabbed my hand. “Come on. Let’s get out of here.”

I didn’t know where he was taking me, nor did I care. We turned down the curved residents’ hall, and I looked around for Wesley, but he’d disappeared. We passed Alex’s room on the right, then mine and several others before entering the next to the last one on the left. I asked, “Is this your room?”

“Yeah.”

“You have a fake window. How nice.” I walked over to it and looked ‘outside’. The hologram’s false sky was a beautiful clear blue, and it was incredible how much I could miss the sun after not seeing it in a couple of days. Even if it wasn’t real.

“Don’t you have a window?”

I shook my head. Then I scooted toward the fake window and put my back against the side wall of the nook it sat in. “There’s room for you.” I patted the spot across from me. Cael hoisted himself into the nook and put his back against the opposite wall so that we faced each other. Then he reached out to touch my cheek and tuck a few loose strands of hair behind my ear. I loved it when he did that. It was comforting, though his touch made me oversensitive.

“I think you’re meant to be in the sun. The light coming through the window makes you practically glow.” He brushed a hand across my hair. “That must be why you always seemed so happy working outside on the farm.”

My smile faded, and I stared out the window. “I wish Jensen didn’t let you watch that test. I hope he doesn’t let you watch any others. I don’t want you to see me like that.”

“See you like what?”

“I’m not a bad person, Cael. I don’t want you to see me use this stupid power thing I have.”

“I know you’re not a bad person, Iggy. You never could be. God, I would never think that about you. And what you can do is amazing. It’s not bad, and you’re not bad because you have this gift. The way Jensen forces you to use it is the only bad part.”

“I’ve never done anything with it other than hurt things, Cael. There’s nothing good about what I can do. Nothing good about me.”

“You help your family and friends.” I rolled my eyes and he asked, “Have you ever tried doing something good with it? Have you ever even considered that your power could be good and not bad?”

“No. Between being sick for years and then being forced to do what Jensen said, nothing good has ever come of it. Not even when I tried to help you.”

Cael put a hand on my knee. “I want you to think of something positive. Seriously, Iggy. If you’re ever bored or lying in bed and you can’t sleep, I want you to focus on the good you might do. Even if it’s something simple. Don’t dwell on the negative. Jensen does that enough for all of us.”

“What I’d really like to do is ignore it.”

“That’s not realistic. It’s part of who you are. But keep in mind that you have to separate yourself from what you’re made to do in labs. Your ability isn’t to kill animals, Iggy. That’s just how they make you manifest it. I hate to think that, for the rest of your life, you’re going to think you have this horrible thing inside you that you have to hide from yourself and everyone else.”

I pulled my knees up to my chest. “I feel evil.”

He shook his head. “You’re caring and bright and bubbly, and people love you. Your power is just something that’s an intangible part of you like your selflessness or your ability to love others. You could choose to be selfish, but you don’t. You could choose to hate people and life – especially after what’s happened to you – but you don’t. Jensen chooses to make you do bad. But Iggy, everything about you, including all of your intangibles, is inherently good.”

I leaned my head against the wall and closed my eyes. Cael was amazing. Too good to me. He made me feel like there was hope for happiness in being exactly who I am. That I didn’t have to hide or be ashamed. I never thought I’d find anyone who would accept me without judgment like Dad, Kim, and Wesley; but they’d always insisted I hide my ability. Cael made me feel like every part of me was worthy of being seen. I felt like I could deal with anything when he was with me.

The hand on my knee squeezed. “Iggy? Did I say something wrong?”

I opened my eyes, smiled at him, and shook my head. “I was just thinking how lucky I am to have you in my life.”

He chuckled. “You didn’t think that when we were kids.”

“Well, you’re like a fine wine, Cael. You get better with age.”

“Har. Har.” His arm snaked out and he pinched my side. I yelped and laughed. “I think I’ve found your weakness.” He leaned forward and used both hands to tickle me.

I started laughing hysterically while swatting at his arms. “Stop! Cael!” I squirmed around until I was laying half across his lap, and I wrapped my arms around my waist to deny him access. I sucked in a breath and laughed some more, kicking and wiggling.

When he stopped, I lay there a second to catch my breath, prepared to fend him off if his fingers so much as twitched. “Are you done? I hope you’re done because I hit when I get tickled, and I don’t want to hurt you.”

He chuckled and helped me sit up, and I found myself sitting between his legs. But instead of letting me go, he pulled me back against his chest and wrapped his arms around me. I melted against him, relaxing back into his chest and tipping my head back against his shoulder. He swept my hair aside and nuzzled my neck, his fingers trailing lightly across my shoulder. I inhaled sharply, goosebumps rising on my arms, and the fingers of the hand I was resting on his forearm dug into his skin.