“I want to have a baby,” she spat when the weight of the silence became too much. There was probably a more tactful way to approach the conversation but Miranda was stumped on how to do so. “I’ve wanted to have a baby for a long time, and I decided I want one now. I’m not getting any younger.”
The idea of contacting a sperm bank had come to her after she’d watched Jeremy leave that morning. If she couldn’t have the man she wanted, because he didn’t want a baby, then she should have a baby on her own. At least then she’d get half her dream.
“Is that why you haven’t been returning my calls?” He spoke with such accusation it almost hurt.
“You’re too young for all this. We’re in different places in our lives.”
He slammed his hand onto her end table.
Miranda jumped.
“How do you know what I want?” he accused. “You never even asked.”
She opened her mouth to respond, but his angry eyes stopped her. Had she misjudged him? It wasn’t that she thought he was immature, but that he had other focuses. A thriving career that required him to travel for long stretches of time. That was no way to raise a child, right?
“I’m twenty-seven, for fuck’s sake,” he continued, forcing the words through his clenched teeth. “I’m not in high school. I am perfectly capable of raising a child and supporting a family.”
“You’re right.” She nodded.
She
had
been treating him like a child. He was perfectly capable of supporting a family monetarily. He wasn’t fifteen years old anymore. She’d never questioned his capability, it was more his intention. He still had a whole life ahead of him. Did he really want to spend his nights cleaning up vomit and changing dirty diapers?
He took a step closer to her, grabbing her hands in his. “Is this what you want? What you need?”
She gulped and nodded, watching him anxiously.
“It’s not exactly what I planned. I was hoping to have more time with you, just the two of us.” He combed a hand through his hair roughly. Several strands stuck up across the back of his head. “But if you want a baby now, we can do that.” He quirked one eyebrow at her, the carefree Jeremy returning with a smile.
Miranda focused on breathing as she stared into his honest eyes. Could he be serious? They barely knew each other—romantically at least. They’d had one amazing night together. That was it. Could he really consider a family and a future with her?
“I’ve always dreamed about having a baby girl first,” he continued.
His words clouded her mind with fantasies too close to her own.
“One with round cheeks and bright blue eyes. But let’s hope she inherits my figure. I couldn’t stand some guy sniffing after her, the way I do you.”
She laughed, allowing him to pull her closer. Without a thought, she melted into his arms. It just felt right, perfect to be in his embrace. Everything else, all her fears, her doubts, floated away.
“I’ve wanted to be with you for as long as I can remember,” he whispered in her ear, his breath warm and comforting along her skin. “The one night we spent together was the most amazing night of my life. And I’m not letting you go, no matter what. I’ll do anything to make you happy. If you want, we can get married tomorrow. I’ll put my place up for sale right now. Whatever you want, Miranda, whatever you need. Just say the word and I’ll do everything I can to make it happen.”
She looked up at him in disbelief. He couldn’t be serious. He wanted to have a family with her? To get married? To move into the suburbs? This was all happening so quickly. She and Leo had been married for years before they’d tried to have a family. She couldn’t believe it.
“I
can’t
ask you to do that.” Her chest tightened, but she needed him to know. She needed to be sure he
really
wanted this. That she hadn’t pushed this on him.
“You’re not. We were going to start a family eventually. This is a little fast, but I can handle it.” He brushed a kiss to her temple. The sweet gesture sank right to her heart. “I want you. Forever. The rest we’ll figure out as we go along.”
“What about your job?” She watched him for any indication of regret or anger, but she found no trace of either emotion. Only a large smile covered his face.
He shrugged. “It’s just a job. I can find another one.”
She stared at him, shocked. Jeremy had worked hard for his career. He’d fought for his place in the photography world. She’d heard all the stories from his mother over the years. The bad jobs he’d accepted to work his way up, the crummy motels he’d stayed in and the days he’d spent lying in wait for the perfect shot, all to become the best.
She shook her head. He didn’t know what he was talking about.
“You love your job. You can’t give that up so easily.”
“I can take photos anywhere. It doesn’t matter to me. As long as I’m with you, the rest is just details.”
“How can you say that after one night? How can you give up so much for me, after so short a time?”
He grinned, pressing his lips to her hair.
The small gesture sent shivers through her.
“It hasn’t been just one night for me. Spending the night with you only confirmed what I’ve always known. You’re the one behind in this relationship. “
“And how’s that?” She joked back.
“That you’re the only woman I could spend my life with. I’ve been in love with you for over ten years.”
How she wanted to believe him. To be like Jeremy and see how perfect and happy their life together could be. But all she saw were roadblocks across their path. She hated to put him through all that, even if he wanted the same, but he was right. He was old enough to decide for himself. To determine what he wanted, who he wanted, and what he was willing to deal with to have it all.
But she couldn’t stop herself from bringing those obstacles to his attention.
“What about your parents? Do you think they’ll be excited for you to be a husband and a dad so quickly?” She stared up in him in earnest, even as she realized it didn’t matter. Not anymore. If having a life and family together was what she and Jeremy wanted, everyone else would just have to deal with it.
“Are you kidding? My mom’s been begging me to stop traveling on all these long exotic shoots and get married. She told me just yesterday she’s afraid she’ll be a hundred and two before she gets a grandbaby.” He chuckled, a deep rumbling sound that filled her with warmth. “Won’t we give her a shock?”
Miranda smiled too. They’d be shocking a lot of people. “They won’t mind that you’re settling down with a woman who’s almost a decade older than you? Or that you’re having a baby with the woman next door, the one who watched you grow up?”
“I don’t care what they think,” he responded simply. “If they can’t see how much I love you, how happy we make each other, then it’s their loss.”
How could she argue with that? She looked up into his eyes, the honesty within them so true and right.
Before she could even think about it, Miranda captured his head within her grip and pulled his mouth down to hers. The second their lips touched, pure bliss filled her. How had she survived six whole days without his touch, without his kiss? It didn’t seem possible.
Jeremy responded in turn, threading his fingers through her hair. He deepened the kiss. His tongue probed her mouth, sweeping across her teeth and along her tongue. He tasted so good, sweet and dark at the same time, like his chocolate eyes. His woodsy male scent floated along her senses, and her legs became unsteady. She could easily get addicted to him. To his taste, his touch, his smell. How she wanted this for the rest of her life.
He pulled back from her, his deep breaths wafting against her face. “I love you, Miranda,” he stated the words, so matter of factly, as though he’d said them a million times before.
She froze, her heart skipping a beat. She looked up into his eyes and had no choice but to reply. “I love you too.” Her chest tightened at the avowal—the truest words she’d ever spoken. She did love Jeremy. More than she’d ever thought possible. And he deserved to know.
“Good.” A huge smile spread across his face.
An expression she wanted to see a lot more of.
“Now that we have everything cleared up, why don’t we get started on this baby plan?” He crooked an eyebrow at her.
She giggled back at him.
“I think I know just the way to begin.”
“I bet you do.” She laughed as he grabbed her hand and pulled her toward the bedroom. Even with the broken leg, he moved quickly through her home.
He winked back at her. “We’ll talk about wedding plans after.”
Once inside the room, he twirled her in his arms, then turned her around, pressing his lips to hers. He enveloped her in his embrace. There wasn’t anywhere else she’d rather be. And she wanted him to feel the same with her. He’d already given her so much and she wanted to offer him something too. To show him that she loved him just as much as he loved her. And she knew only one way to do that.
“I don’t know about all this.” She tightened her arms around him, unable to let him go, even if it was the best thing for him. It felt too good in his arms to relinquish it. “I can’t ask you to give up your career. You can’t stay here and become a wedding photographer. You’re better than that.” And she wanted better than that for him too.
He smiled down at her, his bright eyes almost twinkling. “Having you will be more than worth it.”
Before she could respond, he tugged her down to the bed beneath him. He settled his mouth on hers as they rolled across the mattress. A sharp pain echoed up her knee where his cast knocked against her joint, but she didn’t care. No pain mattered. She’d take fifty knocks to be close to him.
She wrapped her legs around him, dragging him closer. He groaned when she ground her pussy into his thigh, sucking in a breath at the zip of pleasure that radiated from her crotch through the rest of her body. He palmed her head in his hands, holding her in place for his deep kisses.
She gasped for breath when he finally withdrew. He slid his lips down her throat as he gave her a minute to catch her breath.
“I don’t feel right about this,” she whispered close to his ear.
He sucked on the column of her neck. A shiver ripped through her.
“You love your job. You shouldn’t have to give it up.” She ended the words there, forcing herself not to add on,
I’m not worth it.
“I’m willing to.”
She shook her head. “But I don’t want you to have to pick one or the other.” That’s the choice she’d been faced with—Jeremy or a baby—and it was a horrible choice to make. She hated to force those same requirements on him. He deserved more. “You should get to have everything you want. Like you’ve given me,” she whispered, her heart lodged in her throat.
He pulled back, staring at her for a second, studying her expression.
“You only have to work at the library for the school year, right?”
She nodded. The library required all their employees during the busy school year. But in the summer, they shortened the hours, depending on employee availability. Since she didn’t have any kids, or even a husband anymore, she always volunteered to work.
“Did you mean what you said about wanting to travel? To see some of the places I’ve been to?”
She nodded again. She’d love to see all the exotic places he’d traveled to, all the glorious wonders of the world. She wished she’d been more adventurous before now, that she’d experienced more of what life had to offer before settling down. But the most adventurous thing she’d ever done in her life had been letting Jeremy kiss her. No matter how great a kisser he was, there had to be more to life than that.
“I could bring you with me. We could spend the summers traveling and the winters here. Would you like that? I don’t think I could last a few months without you, not after getting a taste of you.”
He nipped at her ear and she giggled.
“Really?” She wrapped her hand around his cheek, loving the friction of his short beard against her palm as he turned into her touch. “You think we could travel and have a baby?” She’d always been jealous of Jeremy’s travels. She’d looked with such longing at the pictures his parents had shown her. The opportunity to experience the same was more than she could ever hope for.
But she couldn’t have it all, could she? Exciting travel, a younger man who loved her, and a baby. Could anyone be that lucky?
“Sure, other people can do it. Why can’t we?” He sucked a little harder on her neck, nuzzling into the junction of her shoulder and throat. “We can figure it out. I’m sure of it.”
“But what about money?” Her income from the library wasn’t much, but it supported her well enough. But a baby, or a whole family?
“You don’t have to worry about that.” He smiled before dipping down further, his lips sliding across her collarbone then between her beasts. “I earn a good income. I have more than enough to keep you in the standard of living I want you to grow accustomed to.”
“And what kind of lifestyle is that?”
He rubbed his chin along her sternum. The rough brush of his stubble stoked her nerves, vibrating out to the rest of her body. Her nipples beaded. Wetness dripped between her thighs.
“I don’t know, I was thinking something like, making love all day.” He pushed her shirt and bra aside then pulled her nipple into his mouth.
She arched toward him. “I could get used to that.”
He released her nipple, nuzzling his way underneath the layers of her clothing to her other breast. He looked up at her, his eyes dark, clouded with lust. “How about a life where I give you everything you ever wanted and fulfill every dream you’ve ever had?”
She squeezed her arms tighter around his neck, suddenly dizzy. He extended his tongue to rub it across her puckered nipple.
She hissed out a breath. “Only if I can do the same for you.”
The earnest devotion in his eyes called to a place deep inside her. “You already have, baby.”
And with that, he sealed their mouths together, enrapturing her in a world unlike any she’d ever known. A world where she got everything she wanted. A place filled with love and devotion.
Even with all her fertility troubles with Leo, she had no doubt she and Jeremy would conceive. How could this much love not create a child? But damn, they’d have a good time trying.