Veer (Clayton Falls) (13 page)

I focused on eating my burger.

“It was wit
h Ronny’s cousin two months ago
,
wasn’t it?
Two months. And what was wrong with her?”

“I just wasn’t interested. Besides, she lives in Charleston.”

Tom shook his head. “So is that your excuse with Becca too? She lives too far away? Because a second ago
,
it sounded like you were tired of this town anyway.”

Becca. The last thing I needed was to hear her name.

“Becca and I aren’t going to happen, so just drop it.”

“Not until you tell me why. It’s obvious you’re interested, and she is too. Where’s the issue?”

“
Forget it
.” I threw some cash on the table and walked out. I was going to lose it on Tom if he didn’t shut up.

“Come on, man. Chill out.” Tom caught up with me outside.

“Just forget I said anything, okay?”

“It’s going to blow over. You
’
r
e
just having a rough patch. Maybe you should take some vacation, visit your family or something.”

“Maybe,” I mumbled
,
but
I
knew I wouldn’t actually take his advice.

Chapter
T
hirteen

Becca

I hid out all weekend, telling Molly and Jake I was sick and didn’t want them to catch it. I rewatched my movies again, making another mental note to ask Jake to borrow some of his.
If I didn’t keep
my mind occupied
,
it j
ust went back to Friday night. That night
was now firmly on my list of events I wanted to erase from my memory. Maybe some people would have been able to handle a dumb hookup, but I just felt gross and worthless.

Mrs. Mathews came by
on Sunday evening
. I reluctantly opened the door and found her holding a large
Pyrex
dish.

“Hi, hon. I made some extra lasagna, and I thought you might want some.”
She had her hair tied back in a low ponytail that made her look younger.

“Oh, wow. Thanks. That wasn’t necessary.”

“Nonsense
. I
t’s always easy to make a little extra when you’re cooking.”
She adjusted the foil covering the dish.
“I’ve told you already, you are always welcome to join us for dinner.”

“Thank you, but I don’t want to impose. You’ve already done so much.”
They might have
given
me a place rent free, but they had no obligation to feed me like I was part of the family.

“It’s not
imposing
. We’d love to have you, but I won’t push you.”

“Well, thanks
for the lasagna
.” I accepted the dish and carried it into the kitchen. Mrs. Mathews came in and waited as I placed it in the fridge.

“So how are you doing? Is there anything I can do to make you feel more at home?”

“No,
I have everything I need
.
But thanks for thinking of me
.”
She looked
disappointed
when I didn’t ask for anything. “Well, I do have one question.”

“Sure, what is it?”

“Is there anywhere to get sushi around here?”

“Sushi?” She smiled. “I wouldn’t trust anything with that name in town, but I’m sure there’s something decent in Wilmington. I can ask around for you.”

“Oh, that’s okay. I just thought I’d ask.”

“It’s not a problem
.
I’ll get a name of a place. Maybe Jake knows. Speaking of which, has he been bothering you too much? Be honest
. I
f he has
,
I can get him out of your hair.”

Jake definitely wasn’t my problem. “No, he’s been great.”

“All right
.
I just wanted to check.”

“Thanks, but he’s been nothing but nice.”

“That’s
good
to hear. I’m going to get going, but I’ll
find that restaurant name for you.”

“Thanks so much.” I closed and locked the door behind her, feeling better than I had all weekend.

***

Monday morning came
agonizingly slow
ly
. As much as I dreaded seeing Matt, it would provide a welcome break from sitting around feeling stupid—even if he did eye me like I was a piece of meat.
I
got dressed, ready
,
and into Molly’s car.

Matt was waiting for me with a
smile
. “Have a nice weekend?”

“I was sick, but it was fine. You?”

“My in-laws came to visit.” He said it like it explained everything.

“Oh, I’m sure your kids enjoyed seeing their grandparents.”

“They did
.
I’m just glad to have my house back
.
Y
ou know how it is when family visits, right?”

I didn’t, but I nodded.

He gave me some more research to do, and it kept me busy for a while.
I called the garage to check on my car again, but the owner gave me the same answer he had when I’d seen him the last time. They were waiting on a part.

I checked my email around
eleven
and got the message I was dreading. My grades
for the semester
had sta
rted coming back in
,
and
they’d dropped
for the second semester in a row.
Any hope I had for keeping my scholarship was
gone. Even
if I got A’s in my last two classes
,
I was sunk
. I tried to push it out of my head, but by lunch
,
I decided I needed to call the
d
ean
and see if they could make an exception and give me another semester to prove myself.

I went for a walk around the square as I waited for the
d
ean
to call back
. I picked
up
as soon as I heard the first bar of my
familiar ring
tone
.
I really needed to change the song. The dean didn’t beat around the bush. He got right to the point.
“I’m sorry
,
Rebecca, but we can’t make an exception. I know you had a difficult
year
with your mother’s death, but there’s nothing we can do.”
His sympathetic tone did little to ease the impact of his words.

“I understand you can’t make exceptions. I’ll just apply for extra loans, thank you.” Seriously, what else could go wrong?

I shouldn’t have asked. Matt found every excuse in the book to
put his hands on me
that afternoon. It took all of my strength to avoid snapping at him. I couldn’t afford to lose the job.

***

“All right, enough is enough.” Jake pounded on the door Saturday evening. I’d successfully avoided everyone all week. I’d begged out of a barbeque at Kelly and Tom’s
.
I knew Gavin would be there. There was no way I was letting him see how much he’d hurt me.

I opened the door, afraid Jake would
tip his parents off if I didn’t. Mrs. Mathews was nice, but she was also really nosy.

“Yes?” I asked as he pushed his way
past
me.

“What’s going on?”

“Nothing. I’m just watching TV.”

“Molly called me. You cancelled plans with her for the fourth time this week. You cancelled on me twice.”
He took his usual spot on the couch.

“So?”

“So
,
that isn’t like you.”

I laughed dryly. “How would you know what was like me
? Y
ou barely know me.”

“I know you well enough.”

“I don’t want to talk about it.” Just thinking about Gavin made me angry. I felt so used and so stupid. And the wor
st part
was
that there was some side of me that wanted to see him again—that kind of missed him
.
I was seriously messed up.

“Come on, tell me what’s wrong,” he pleaded.

So Jake wanted me to open up? He was going to get what he asked for. I sat back down on the couch
. H
e sat down next to me.

“Have you ever been with a girl who was so bad in bed you wanted to pretend it never happened?”
I couldn’t make myself
meet his eye
as I asked. I was sure my face was bright red.

“What?”
H
e looked at me
as if I were
crazy.

“Answer me.” I felt hot tears of embarrassment form
ing
.

“No. Never. But where the hell is this coming from?”

“I think I’m that girl.” That was it
.
I couldn’t hold back.

“What happened?” Jake
moved closer to me, and I leaned into him
. “
Are you trying to tell me you slept with someone since the last time I saw you?”

I was sobbing too hard to
answer him
,
so I nodded.

He pulled back and took my face in his hands. “Look at me. I don’t know what happened, but I promise you, you didn’t do anything wrong, and you certainly weren’t bad in bed. You got that?”

I nodded again, humiliated to be having the conversation.
He released my face.

“Okay, now
that we’ve established that. Who the hell is the asshole? And what exactly did he say to you?”

I took a few deep breaths while Jake went to grab a box of tissues from the bathroom. “I can’t tell you
. H
e wanted to keep it between us.”

“What the
hell
? Tell me, Becca. I swear
I
’m
going to go ballistic if you don’t!”

“Calm down.”
I took
a tissue.

“No. Who
w
as i
t?”

I was so pissed at Gavin that I let it out. “Gavin.”

“What? You slept with Gavin?
Why?”

“I don’t know. We were drunk
,
and it
just
happened.”

“And he told you he didn’t want you to tell anyone?”

“He said it was a mistake, and we should forget it
ever
happened
,
or something like that. He said we should keep it between us.”

“
What? What a
fucking
idiot
.”

“Jake. I’m an adult
.
I made the decision to sleep with him.”

“Yeah, but he’s the one who treated you that way. And he goes around acting
all
holier than thou. What a crock of shit.”
Jake drew in a deep breath. The anger on his face was such a contrast to his usual grin.

“I
just feel dumb. If I could find another job somewhere, I’d just get the heck out of this town.”

“Becca, don’t say that. And don’t feel dumb. You wanted to do something, so you did it. It’s not your fault he acted like that.
You belong here as much as he does.
”

“He lives here. I don’t.”

“For now.
He’s not from here either. And hey, y
ou could always come back after you graduate.”

I laughed. “And why would I do that?”

He shrugged. “I don’t know. Why not?”

“As much fun as I’m having working at
Morgan
and
Morgan
,
i
t’s not like it’s my dream job.”
I’m sure he hear
d
the sarcasm in my voice.

“It’s not the only law job.”

“True, but I’m not coming back. Any chance of that’s gone. I am so
embarrassed
. And can I admit something?”

“Of course.”

“I actually felt something
.
I really thought we might have had a connection or something
.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.” I relaxed
. I
t felt good to get it out.