Victory Lane (Shady Falls #1) (20 page)

We watched as she dove right in with the guys. She was able to seamlessly move among them and get the rear of the car removed and replaced. The guys followed her lead without question and made her suggested adjustments.

“She’s something else, ain’t she?” a voice came behind us. Axel stood back and watched as the car quickly came together again. “I must admit, I had my doubts about her. I listened into everything today; she knows what she’s doing.”

Ky and I turned to the older man, he smiled. “She’s also sweet and kind. She’s quite the woman. A man would be stupid to let a woman like that get away.” He turned his gaze from the ground floor and looked me dead in the eyes but talked to Kyle, “You know what I mean, Ky?”

“Hell yeah, I do. That’s how I felt about Margie. Can’t let a good woman get away.”

I could hear the smirk in Kyle’s voice when he responded. But my eyes never left Axel; I knew what he was telling me. I just hadn’t realized I was that obvious when I was around her. Hearing Axel, Kyle, and thinking about what Bobby said last night about needing to push her, I wondered what I was doing. I still insisted I was too fucked up after everything with Anna to ever be in another relationship. But ever since I began spending any kind of time with Toni, I was wondering if maybe my heart wasn’t as fucked up as it once was.

~oOo~

We rented out two large cabins just outside of Daytona for the two weeks we’re there. One of the houses was smaller. It had four huge bedrooms in the two-story house with a large living space, dining room and a kitchen in the middle of it all on the first floor. Axel had one of the bedrooms, Ky and Margie had one, I had one, and Toni had the last. The other guys occupied the larger of the two houses. It was a three-story house with enough room for the entire crew. The houses were in a gated community where we didn’t have to worry about being bothered while we rested and got ready for the races. Most races we stayed in trailers on the infield, but Daytona was an extended stay, so we preferred to be comfortable.

I stood outside of Toni’s room on Friday evening, debating if I should knock or not. Yesterday I had basically made the decision to try to push whatever this was in the direction I wanted it to go. She might not be interested or ready, but I was going to find a way to get her to be with me. Finding my resolve, I quietly knocked on her door. Axel was out with some other team owners having dinner, and Ky and Margie went out for dinner, so it was just Toni and me in the house for the next few hours.

After a few moments of her not answering, I knocked again, louder. After what seemed like forever, I heard the lock on the door disengage and the door slid open.

“Hey, what’s up?” she asked looking confused. I grazed my eyes down her body. Her long dark hair was loose, flowing over her shoulders, down her arms, and over her chest. It was much longer than I realized, darker than the darkest brown that I’d ever seen, but not quite black either. My gaze continued down her body to the thin t-shirt she was wearing stretched perfectly across her pert braless breasts, down to the tight leggings that hugged her pretty curves. I forced my eyes back to her face and found her looking at me, her face flushed and staring at me in confusion. She glanced down at herself and immediately crossed her arms across her chest, covering herself but with little luck. The low cut, thin tee shirt hugged her ample curves and no matter what she did, she wasn’t covering the swells that hid beneath the gauzy fabric.

I gave her a wide smile and pushed past her into her room, grazing the soft skin on her arm as I moved. “Nothin’ much. Figured I’d come keep you company.” I parked myself on the foot of the bed that was in the center of the room. Her room was set up like my own. There was a huge, plush king size bed with more pillows than anyone would ever need and a large flat screen television mounted on the opposite wall from where the bed sat. On either side of the bed there were side tables, there were also dressers and a closet, and a private bathroom was just off the room.

“What’re you doing?” she looked at me, the confusion was still there, but there was also a hint of worry. She stayed by the door and stared at me nervously. I hoped that I was making the right choice.

Chapter Fourteen

Toni

Julius sat on my bed, just staring at me. His eyes had devoured me when they skimmed down my body. I was self-conscious of the way I looked, and unnerved by his presence in my room. I didn’t like how he made me feel, as if he could see through my shields, through my clothes, to where the scars, both physical and emotional, resided. I felt like all of my walls were starting to crumble when he looked at me. He didn’t seem like he was the kind of guy who would take advantage of a woman or do anything that would harm anyone. But I also didn’t think Todd would at first either. Clearly, I wasn’t the best judge of character.

“Well,” he started, “Axel’s out, Ky and Marg are out, so it’s just you and me. I thought we could hang out and watch a movie, maybe order some food.”

“In my room?” I asked. His presence in my room, the way his tight shirt accentuated every single muscle in his chest and stomach, and stretched across his biceps, all made me a nervous wreck. Add that to the bulging thigh muscles peeking out from under his loose gym shorts, I could barely think straight. I could take on a pit crew of guys for the chance to be part of the team, but I couldn’t take this sexy as hell man sitting in my room and staring at me the way he was. He smiled widely. His smile was amazing and made me even more nervous. I stared at him, waiting for him to answer.

He snickered and leaned back on his hands and looked at me. His biceps and forearm muscles bulged under the strain of holding him upright. His shirt stretched even more across his chest and stomach. His shirt rode up just enough to show a hint of his tanned torso, carved muscle, black hair, and ink just above the waistband of his shorts. I quickly averted my eyes to his face, only to find his eyes traveling down the length of me again, making me feel exposed. I uncrossed my arms from in front of me, but I was immediately aware I wasn’t wearing a bra and the shirt I was wearing was thin and left little to the imagination. I could only imagine what he thought when I opened the door like this. It’s not like I could fully cover myself with my arms. “Well,” he bounced a bit on the bed, sending my thoughts to completely inappropriate places. “Your bed is exceptionally comfortable, but I was thinkin’ we could hang out in the livin’ room.”

I relaxed, I was sure he could see my obvious change; it was not as if I could hide how uncomfortable I was. He made me nervous, he made me feel things I wasn’t used to, and sitting on my bed and being alone with him in my room scared the hell out of me. He hadn’t done anything to make me afraid of him, but I hadn’t been alone in a room with a man for a very long time.

He stood and his full lips quirked with his sexy chortle. I loved how his eyes lit up and his whole face wore his smiles. “Well, what do you think?”

I nodded. “Yeah, sure. Let me grab a sweatshirt or something, it’s kinda chilly.”

His eyes skimmed down my body again, lingering at my breasts. He quickly flicked his eyes back up to meet mine though. His appraising glance didn’t make me feel violated at all; it only made me feel desire. “I’ll go order, what do you want?”

“How about a burger and fries?” I said instantly. He turned and sauntered away, but then I shouted, “Oh, and a milkshake too!”

“You’re hungry, ain’t ya?”

I felt the flush cross my face. I liked to eat and I wasn’t one to hide it. But it made me wonder what he thought about that. I wasn’t fat, but I also wasn’t supermodel thin like Mia or Margie either. Todd always told me how fat I was, did he think the same? Julius turned back around and noticed my flush and immediately he said, “I think it’s great that you ain’t afraid to eat, angel. So many women eat like damned rabbits or somethin’; it’s annoying. I’d rather be around a woman who is who she is and doesn’t change for anyone. Besides,” he said glancing down my body once more. “I like what I see.”
Well, I guess that’s good for me because I rarely pretend to be something I’m not. And when did he start calling me angel?
He gave me another smile, before turning and leaving the room. I took in a deep breath and grabbed my hoodie. That smile of his was going to be the death of me if he kept it up. But he said we’re friends, so why does spending the evening alone with him make me feel like a bunch of butterflies has just taken flight in my stomach and chest. His damn smile … it lit up my insides and made me feel things I didn’t know how to handle.

After pulling on my hoodie and zipping it up, I took a resolved breath and walked into the living room area. There Julius was, in all of his gym shorts and tight t-shirt glory, sitting on the small couch with his socked feet propped on the coffee table flipping through channels on the television. He looked completely comfortable; I wished I felt that way right now.

Ever since I admitted to Mia that I thought I might be starting to have feelings for him, all I could think about was Julius Fuller. It was incredibly difficult to focus on the car after the duel on Thursday when I knew he stood nearby watching the progress. He and Kyle thought they were out of sight, but they weren’t, I noticed them almost immediately. Although I most always notice
him
immediately.

I walked into the room and sat in the chair close to the couch. I wanted to sit next to him, but then again, I didn’t want to crowd him either. He might not want me so close. I hated feeling like some high school girl with her first crush. I loathed not knowing exactly how to behave. I hadn’t noticed how awkward I could be before meeting Julius. But now, I wished I knew what I was doing. I wished I knew exactly how to act and what to do to get him to notice me. He seemed to like being around me, so I guess being me was okay. But it was tough to relax.

“What are you sittin’ all the way over there for? The food’s comin’ soon, you’ll wanna use the table with me. Besides, there’s a better angle for the TV from over here.” He patted the space next to him. He was so large he took up most of the space on the small couch. His broad shoulders were hulking in the small space.

“Yeah, okay,” I said, trying to tame the gathering of insane fluttering butterflies taking up residence in my gut. “You’re probably right.”

“Of course I’m right,” he smirked. “I’m always right.”

I snickered. This I could do. Friendly banter was familiar and comfortable for me. I immediately relaxed. “I don’t know about that.”

He scowled. “Is that so? You’ll come to find out that I’m always right. Just ask Margie.”

My smile widened in challenge. “Well, someone certainly has a high opinion about his self-worth.”

“A lot of people have a high opinion of my worth, angel,” he said with a hint of promise in his deep rasp.
There was that name again, angel.
He paused for a moment and patted the seat next to him. “You’re still sittin’ too far away. I promise I won’t bite.”

The quivering in my gut intensified with the look he was giving me. A heated look which made me both excited and nervous. I wanted to be closer to him, but I was terrified.
We’re friends, just friends.
I sit next to Mia, Jake, and Cade all the time. Hell, sometimes I could be found on one of the twin’s laps when there was nowhere else to sit.
He’s my friend, there’s no reason I can’t sit next to him.
Gritting my teeth, I moved out of the chair and slid into the space next to him on the couch. He took up so much space, I hand no choice but to have my leg touch his from time to time.

We sat in silence for a few moments, and I again cursed my ineptitude in these types of situations. I wished I knew how to talk to him. I could talk to Jake, Cade, and Kyle with no problem. I could talk to all of the guys on the team or in my classes and never stumbled or felt unsure. So why did I have such a problem when Julius was around? I knew what the problem was; I wasn’t attracted to any of them, just Julius. Yeah, I thought some of them to be good looking but none of them were anything like Julius. He was by far my version of the perfect man. The looks, the talent, the personality, all in one hot as hell package.

I kept my eyes plastered to the television, not paying any attention to what was playing. I was so sure I could feel him looking at me sometimes, but was afraid to find out. What if it was my imagination? What if I caught him looking at me weirdly or something? I knew I was being ridiculous; I needed to get a grip and grow the hell up. I was acting like some inept teenager.

I stopped worrying and thinking when he turned his entire body to face me. His knee grazed up my thigh and stopped, pressing into my hip. There was no doubt he was looking at me now, and no way could sit there and ignore it. I turned my head to look at him and he smiled the smile that I was starting to both love and hate seeing. “What?” I asked.

He shook his head. “I make you uncomfortable, don’t I?”

I looked at him, shocked. Was I that obvious? Damn … “No … Not at all. I’m good. Just watchin’ TV.” I tried to give him a self-assured smile. I tried to show him I wasn’t intimidated, but I don’t think I was overly convincing.

He sighed and he looked down seeming almost sad. “I make you uncomfortable,” he whispered. “I’m sorry.” He sat and didn’t say anything for a moment, but then he looked up and gazed into my eyes. “You know, that guy you see on TV, that guy you may have read about in magazines or newspapers, you know that guy ain’t real, right?” He paused for a moment, as if he was gauging my reaction then continued. “It’s hard livin’ your life in the public eye, ya know? The public seems to think they deserve to know every little thing about you. I had to learn quickly to separate the public persona from the private one. There’s certain things I let the public know, or think they know. I typically portray myself as a confident and capable driver, who doesn’t give a shit about anyone but in reality, I’m no different from any other man. I love, I care, and I worry all the time. I bust my ass so I’m the best, not for them, not for the public, but for me. I love drivin’, I always have, and that’s why I do it. Like Axel always says, we let the public see what we want them to see, we only let people that matter see who we are. My guys, my friends, and my family get the real me. The media and the fans, they get the fake version. That guy, he’s not real. This guy sittin’ here, he’s real.”

I took in what he said and felt my heart swell. “So I guess I’m gettin’ the real you then?” I whispered into the silent room.

“You’re definitely getting the real me.” He leaned in close to me again and smiled. “I would never be anythin’ other than the real me around you, angel.” Then he leaned in closer and whispered in my ear, “I want you to know every aspect of who I really am. Not just the driver, me.” His words, the sound of his voice in my ear, his smell, and proximity washed over me. I wanted to speak, but I couldn’t. I wanted to breathe, but I was left breathless by his words. He backed away and his grin stretched across his face. He was so close it would only take me leaning in a little for our lips to meet. A part of me, the part that was confident in myself, wanted to be bold and brave. That part wanted to lean in and take the initiative. But the part that ruled my life was the part that was timid and still flinched away from people when they moved too fast. The part which made me believe I could never be enough for any man. Todd’s voice constantly echoed, telling me I wasn’t pretty enough, thin enough, anything enough for a man. It told me how stupid, ugly, and disgusting I was. But when I looked into Julius’ eyes, his eyes were filled with kindness, his words were gentle. He looked at me as if he saw me, as if he could see beyond the damaged girl. When I was with Julius, I no longer heard Todd’s voice echoing through my brain.

Julius moved his hand up and slid it across my cheek, smoothing a piece of hair behind my ear. His hand lingered in my hair, combing through it until he reached my shoulder. He leaned into me, closer and closer until his mouth was a fraction of an inch from mine. Just when I thought for sure he was going to kiss me, there was a knock on the door. He looked into my eyes and I could see the frustration. Instead of moving closer, he moved back and stood to answer. It was only when I had distance from him that I was finally knocked out of my thoughts and was able to breathe. I felt as if I was going to faint and I wasn’t sure if it was because of lack of oxygen or how he made me feel.

He returned moments later with our food and placed the bag on the table. He sat back down next to me, but much closer this time. His thigh touching my thigh, his hip touching mine.

“So I thought your burger and fries idea was great, so I got two.” He pulled our food from the bag and placed it all out in front of us. He revealed a smorgasbord of food. Burgers, fries, milk shakes, and apple pie for desert.

“This looks great; it’s an awful lot of food though.”

“Well, what you don’t eat, I’ll finish. I need my calories for the race,” he winked at me and smiled. It just wasn’t fair that he could set my heart racing the way he could. He probably had no idea what kind of effect he had on me. I kind of wanted him to resume what he was about to do before the knock on the door, but he didn’t. He just looked a little flustered, but he smiled again. “So, what do you wanna watch? I was thinkin’ a movie.”

“Yeah, sure,” I managed. “Did you have something specific in mind?”

We sat together and watched some action movie about street racing that I hardly paid any attention. I probably would have liked the movie, if for no other reason than the cars, but I couldn’t focus on anything. I was so caught up in my own head that it was as if I couldn’t even see the TV. We ate in silence but the noise of the movie filled the space, making it comfortable. I’d never felt this relaxed with a man other than my family. It was nice.