Violet Path (20 page)
“If you’re the one who told the other communities, how did you find out about me?” I asked.
“We’re not too far from H.S.H.S., and David and I used to sneak onto your campus sometimes to get intel or more ammo. I think you were with Matthew in someone’s office when we overheard everything.”
No words came to mind. I had trusted him, and he never told me he had spied on me at H.S.H.S. And then he told me I never had a choice in life!
I got up, needing to flee.
“You promised never to be alone!” he scolded me with a sharp accusation.
“I’m going to my cabin, surrounded by people. What could possibly happen?”
“I don’t care where you are, just keep your promise!”
“You still don’t trust Orion and Keith?”
“No! Why should I?”
“Because they haven’t done anything!” I lied. I didn’t trust them either, but I wanted to prove Maxime wrong.
“So you trust them?”
“I don’t judge them without even knowing them!” I snapped. I was always being judged by the color of my eyes, and I didn’t want Keith and Orion being judged because of another community’s threat. I was aware of my naiveté, but it was a strong desire that I held onto.
“So you don’t trust them,” he said.
“That’s not the point. I don’t trust them because we had a close sparring match and I didn’t appreciate their reactions. You, on the other hand, don’t trust them just . . . because.”
“No, I have a reason, and I thought I had made it rather clear. I think they’re suspicious. Or at least their timing at joining The Shadows is suspicious.”
“They joined your resistance; why can’t you just be grateful for more support?”
“Why can’t you just be careful? As they say, ‘Keep your friends close and your enemies closer.’ Most predators wait for the perfect moment.”
“When I’m surrounded by people in a war camp?”
“Alex! I’m serious.” He grabbed my arm and turned me to face him.
“No, you’re paranoid.” I pulled from his grip and kept walking.
“Better safe than sorry.”
“Safe? You’re the one who just said that I wasn’t safe!”
“I’m being logical. You just don’t want to believe there’s danger here. Well, there is. Matthew isn’t the only threat in this world.”
I stormed off to my cabin. He didn’t follow. I just didn’t want to believe that Matthew wasn’t the only source of peril, and I was annoyed that Maxime was right.
I lay on my bed, closed my eyes, and thought about what had happened. I liked how Maxime cared for me, but I didn’t want a babysitter. In some weird way, I almost wanted to be back at the creek in Tamizeh, dipping my feet into the cool, clear water.
The child looked terrified, the unmistakable expression of someone who had lost everything. He was about eight years old and stood shorter than David’s sternum.
“I found him sneaking into the kitchen. His name is Ryan. He’s from Jarva, lost both parents to Matthew, heard about The Shadows, and has decided to join. You can get a lot out of a hungry child if you offer him fresh meat. He has a huge appetite. What should I do with him?” David sounded as if he didn’t care.
“He can have my cabin tonight, including the bed. Show him the restrooms and settle him in my place. We’ll take him to Maria tomorrow,” Maxime answered.
“No! I want to fight!” the boy yelled. I was surprised by his reaction. His voice was strong, and I already admired his courage. I wasn’t the only one who had been surprised.
“Ryan, your courage impresses me, but you’ll only be in danger here,” Maxime started to explain as he knelt to be at eye level with him. “And you are still growing. You will be able to join The Shadows in a couple of years.”
“What if Matthew destroys everything before that? I want him to know what it’s like to lose what he holds onto, everything. I promised my parents that I wouldn’t let him do anything to hurt Jarva, and I need to keep that promise,” Ryan cried.
Maxime wrapped his arms around him. “Matthew will lose everything; I promise.”
“I want to do what you do. I want to fight,” Ryan said through teary eyes.
“You don’t want to do what I do,” Maxime replied in a calm voice.
“Yes, I do! I want to fight like you. Teach me, please. I’m a fast learner. I promise not to disappoint you. I’m really good with swords. I can help with chores. I can hunt. I can do the dishes.”
“I believe you, but it’s not easy to be here. It takes time, effort, and discipline.”
“I have all of those!”
For once, Maxime didn’t know what to say.
“Please,” Ryan pleaded.
“I’ll think about it, but you need to sleep now.”
“Thank you!” Ryan smiled brightly.
“Good night, Ryan.”
David led the boy to The Shadows.
“What’s going to happen to Ryan?” I asked. I had never met my parents, but I knew what it was like to grow up without them, and I felt a strong bond with the young boy. I tried to picture my father and how I would have wanted him to teach me how to fight, but I also imagined my mother braiding my hair and laughing with me late at night, talking about boys. I would have wanted to tell her everything about Maxime.
“I don’t know,” Maxime said.
“But you—”
“I don’t know! I’m not psychic!” Maxime yelled.
“Well, what are you going to tell Ryan tomorrow?”
“I don’t know!”
“He’s, like, eight! He can’t stay here!”
Maxime didn’t respond. He was still in shock, and I could tell that he was withering away. Nick was right: silence did speak for itself.
Maxime finally spoke, “He said the same thing that I had said when I was trying to create The Shadows. The Shadows came from Andrew’s military forces at Maria. I had told Andrew exactly what Ryan just said to me when I had asked him to let me join his army. Andrew spent a lot of time training me, and when he passed away David helped me get The Shadows going. ”
“I’m sorry,” I said.
“I wasn’t eight. You said he was too young, but no other place would let you fight as a teenager.”
“How old were you when you first experienced war?”
“I shot a laser gun at five.”
I was in total shock. It explained all of his knowledge on warfare, but the thought of losing everything at five years old frightened me. In a way, I had been lucky to have never met my parents, because I had never truly lost them. I hated not knowing them and felt as if a part of me was missing, but I had never been attached to them. I suddenly realized that Maxime and I were similar on many different levels; both of us had lost our families.
“I don’t want Ryan to be like me. If I can help it, I never want him to see a gun. But I can’t say no to him when he’s doing what I did. I don’t know what to do.” Maxime’s voice was trembling, and tears filled his eyes.
I wanted to comfort him, wipe his tears, and tell him that everything was all right.
I couldn’t really remember anything before my eleventh birthday. I had never seen pain, destruction, loss, hunger, or death until a few months ago. Not knowing my parents had eliminated the possibility of losing them, and not having a last name meant that I didn’t have any attachments. I couldn’t lose what I didn’t have.
“I’m sorry,” I said.
“Don’t be ridiculous. It wasn’t your fault.”
“Maybe it was.” I knew it was silly; I didn’t kill his parents, Matthew did, but some part of me wanted to take the guilt off of him, and I needed to know that I wasn’t powerless.
“It wasn’t.”
“What if I could have stopped Matthew? What if I had the opportunity to change his plans?”
“You were seven months and four days old when he murdered my parents. You were ignorant of the matter. You were too young. It wasn’t your fault, and the position he forced upon you is not for the better. It’s not an opportunity.”
“How did you know how old I was?” I gasped.
“Does that matter?”
“I guess not.”
He always avoided my questions, but I couldn’t bring myself to torment him anymore. “How old are you?” I asked. I had guessed that he was around my age, maybe a little older.
“Nineteen.”
I tried to imagine leading a war camp at his age, but couldn’t. He was younger than all of his men, but me. He had spent the last sixteen years of his life as an orphan, almost my entire life.
“What’s the reason for always blaming yourself for everything?” I asked.
“Because I know that it’s my fault.”
“How?”
“It’s complicated, and I’m not going to explain it.” He didn’t sound the least bit annoyed or mad, but he knew that the conversation was serious. “I heard David’s been giving you a hard time lately,” Maxime said, changing the subject.
“I’m not the only one.”
“But you’re the one he’s picking on; you’re the target.”
“I don’t know,” I lied.
“What is he bothering you about?” He was only inches away from me. I had to look up when I spoke. His eyes were a shimmering blue, and I wanted him to hold me.
“My group and I were having fun, practicing, and David wanted to know who lost the fight.” I couldn’t think straight with him so close. He hypnotized me. He could have asked me anything, and I would have answered.
“You lost, didn’t you?” He smiled.
“Yes, I was about to stand forth, but Nick started to argue.” I felt drugged by him.
“That’s typical of Nick.”
“Then we all had to take the consequences, thirty push-ups. I stepped forward today, but so did the rest of the group,” I continued.
“They’ll stand up for you, don’t worry. They’re good guys. You’re in the best group.”
“Thanks.” I smiled back, relieved.
After showering, Maxime walked me to my cabin while telling stories of his crazy adventures with David. One time, they had had an early lesson with Andrew, the head of Maria’s military at the time. Maxime had woken up on time, but David’s bed was empty. He had figured David was at Alice’s house, so he ran over there, and to avoid running into her parents, he decided to go to the back of her house. It was extremely dark, so when he had jumped over the fence, he landed on a bush. As he climbed to her window, he had knocked softly, careful not to wake everyone up. She had screamed and her father ran upstairs, only to find David in her room. Maxime and David jumped from her window, sprinted toward the fence, and on their way over, David’s pants had gotten caught and completely ripped down his leg.
Maxime had a lot of stories to share. We laughed a lot but tried to keep the noise down.
When we arrived, I turned to face him and sunk into his pure, blue eyes. I wanted him to hold me, to kiss me. I waited mute, hoping, wishing.
“David is on watch duty tonight in this area, so he’ll be checking on you from time to time,” he announced.
“It’s about time that you caught up with your sleep,” I told him playfully.
“Who said I was getting any?” he said as he leaned in closer, his hair brushing my ear.
“Good night, Maxime,” I whispered, as he walked into the darkness.
That morning at breakfast I’d learned that there were ninety-two new members of The Shadows. They had all come from Jarva and knew each other. I couldn’t remember all of their names or faces, but they all had the same expression of regret, fear, and grief in their eyes.
They were going to spend the day building their cabins and getting their belongings. They would be split up into groups the following day. Although they needed a place to sleep, nothing was rushed, and getting enough supplies would take a long time.
Ryan sat between Maxime and I at the table. The new members had put different tables around the main long one because there weren’t enough seats. Ryan had the biggest appetite. I didn’t know where he stored all of the food, but no one else seemed to notice. His friends from Jarva even said that he wasn’t eating as much as he used to.
It was very cold, so body-warmers had been handed out to the newcomers. Frost covered the ground, cracking with every footstep, giving off a soft and delicate rhythm.
Maxime took me aside with Ryan and told me about their compromise.
“He’ll stay here for some time shadowing you,” Maxime said, trying to sound casual, but his voice was tentative and regretful. “He’ll learn to defend himself but will stay away from the weapons and hunting. I’ll watch him while you’re out hunting. He won’t participate in the competitions but can attend their training. You should as well. He’ll leave when he’s ready.”
I nodded my head in agreement. I didn’t know why Maxime had come up with this idea, but I wasn’t ready to debate with him, especially not in front of Ryan.
“Better get a move on,” I said to Ryan.
It was hard to find a good clearing in The Shadows because of the huge augmentation of its population, but we settled near Maxime’s cabin.
Ryan wasn’t as ignorant as I had expected. He had learned to swordfight and loved virtual martial arts movies; therefore, he knew a couple of moves. We started with physical hand-to-hand combat. I explained how he should plant his feet. He already had a good, strong starting stance and didn’t hesitate to attack. I was very impressed by his skill. I taught him a couple of punches, kicks, and defensive moves. He hadn’t lied; he learned very quickly.
Once we arrived at class, David introduced Ryan to my group and told us that our schedules were going to change, and starting tomorrow our group would be larger. Nick showed up a couple minutes late, but David knew better than to start arguing with him and ignored his tardiness.
David dueled with Ryan, and I fought Orion and Keith again. It was a lot easier than the previous day. I broke their bond, rhythm, and probably some small bones in a matter of minutes. They were actually very weak, but their anger was uncontrollably strong. I was very grateful when class ended. I was tired of fighting them over and over again.
As we headed to our next class, Ryan said, “I need to go to the restroom.”
“I’ll take him. It’s not like I can do much today anyway,” Nick offered, and they left me before I could respond.
“Hey, Alex! Can we walk with you?” Keith asked. I wanted to yell “NO!” I was tired of them following me around and we didn’t get along, but I gave in. My heart deteriorated as I thought of Maxime. I had made a promise. Orion and Keith were suspicious in his eyes, and I was walking with them alone in the forest away from The Shadows.
