Waiting for Love ((Waiting) Book 2) (14 page)

“Jeff, I can’t have sex with you. I shouldn’t have let you kiss me and I definitely had no right to kiss you back. I’m not sure where my relationship stands with my boyfriend right now. We had a fight and we haven’t talked since. He was going home for the holidays and I’m hoping when he comes back we can figure out what’s going on. I can’t sleep with you and ruin my relationship with him and you deserve so much more than what I’ve given you over the past year. You deserve someone who loves you and only you.” I caress his cheek with my fingers. “I’m a damaged mess and you can do so much better.” Before he has a chance to say anything, there’s a knock on my door and Greyson comes in before I even answer.

     “Well, well, well, it looks as though my little sister isn’t as innocent as I was hoping.” He shakes his head as he walks forward.

“Greyson, are you fucking kidding me? Nothing like barging in, asshole. Next time you should try waiting for someone to tell you to enter. What if we were getting it on in here and you saw? You’d be scarred for life.”

“No actually, Jeff would be scarred for life from the damage my fists would do to his pretty face,” He answers, his typical cocky attitude present. He such an annoying ass…a lovable, annoying ass, but an ass just the same.

“Well here’s a little something you may want to remember the next time you barge into my room. I’m an adult and I’ve never taken a vow of chastity, nor will I. I love sex and I plan on continuing to love it for many more years. Knock and wait for a reply next time. If you catch me in the midst of something, I can guarantee it’ll be worse for you than me. I grew up with you guys constantly embarrassing me and teasing me. My skin is pretty thick at this point.” Greyson crosses his arms and cocks his eyebrow at me.

“I only knocked on your door to tell you that Rose will have dinner ready in two hours. We’re eating at noon.” He smirks at me before he turns and walks out of my room.
Grrr, he makes me so mad.

     Jeff has been silent through our entire exchange but now that Greyson is gone, he barks out a laugh.

“Your brothers are too awesome.” He nods his head and smiles at me. “I’m kind of shocked he didn’t kick my ass for finding us in this position. Then again, they do want me to make an honest woman out of you…” He trails off.

“Ha-ha, you guys are all so freaking funny. You can take my place when I join a convent.” We both share a good laugh before getting up.

***

     The rest of Thanksgiving was spent pleasantly with my family before Jeff and I had to make the drive back to Boston later that night. My brothers actually acted civil while we ate but I’m sure that had something to do with my father being there. Even though they’re grown men, he has a way of controlling them all with just a glance. It’s pretty impressive to watch. I’m sure it’s that same air of power he so effortlessly wears, that’s made him such a successful businessman.

    We could’ve stayed at my father’s house longer than we did, but I wanted to get back to the apartment and catch up on my studies. I also need to give this place a thorough cleaning and that’s why at eight o’clock on Saturday morning, I’m already doing laundry. Hailey hasn’t come back from her visit with her family. We could’ve carpooled but I don’t like to be stuck without transportation and I wasn’t sure when I would head back this way. Jeff and I have been exchanging texts daily and things seem to be back to normal with us. Neither of us has mentioned what happened on Thanksgiving morning and I don’t plan on bringing it up. I’m actually thankful that Greyson knocked on the door when he did. Who knows how far it may have escalated?

     I’m listening to my favorite playlist and dusting the living room when there’s a knock on our door. I glance down at the plaid pajama pants and black tank top I’m wearing and grimace. I’m a mess, but there’s not much I can do about it at this point. I smooth my hair back away from my face and redo the messy bun sitting on top of my head as I walk to the door. When I look through the peephole and see who’s there, I jump back as if the door is on fire. I spin around, leaning my back against the cool metal surface as I tip my head back
.
I can’t believe Garrett is here.
I’m not sure I’m ready to talk to him, but I know I need to. We need closure if this relationship is really over. He knocks on the door again, making me jump. I need to calm down.
Okay, I can do this.
I try to psyche myself up as I turn the knob.

    When our eyes meet, the punch of our attraction hits me and it moves all the way down into the depths of my stomach. It takes me by surprise after more than a week without seeing him. In the time since our fight I’ve tried to convince myself that our connection isn’t that extraordinary, but the truth is, I’ve never before experienced anything like it; not even with Jeff.

     As I stand in the doorway, I cross my arms over my chest, waiting for him to say something.

“Hi, Shelby. Can I come in for a bit so we can talk?” His expression is flat, making it hard for me to read. I shrug my shoulders and step aside. As he walks by me, it’s impossible not to notice the way his jeans hug his ass just right and how broad his shoulders look in his black hoodie. I close and lock the door before joining him.

“Please, sit down. Do you want anything to drink? I have coffee or water.” He sits down on the couch as I wait for him to answer.

“No thank you. I’m all set.” I sit down next to him, careful to leave some space between us. If he’s breaking up with me, I’m going to want some distance. He clasps his hands in front of him and rests his elbows on his knees, looking down at the floor. I stare at him, willing him to break this awkward silence that feels as though it might smother me. He looks at me and I try not to get lost in the depths of his hazel eyes. I want to despise him for ignoring my calls, but I can’t. Seeing him again, having him sitting here with me, makes me realize how much I’ve actually missed him.

“How was your Thanksgiving?”
Seriously?

“Garrett, did you really come over here to ask about my Thanksgiving?” He sits up, angling his upper body near mine.

“No, I didn’t come here for that. I wanted to apologize for the way I acted when you said you didn’t want me to meet your family. I shouldn’t have made such a big deal out of it. I was hurt, but you’re right...we haven’t been together long and there’s plenty of time for that to happen.”

     I’m kind of confused right now. He’s acting as if we’re still together and I didn’t think we were.
Are we?

     “Garrett, I was under the impression that we’d broken up. I called you a few times and never heard back from you. It’s been nine days since our fight and we haven’t spoken. What was I supposed to think?” I hold my hands palms up and shake my head at him.

“I’m sorry I didn’t get back to you. I just needed some time to work it all out in my head.”

“I’m no relationship expert, but I’m pretty sure that you shouldn’t ignore someone for nine days, especially when you claim to be serious about them...serious enough that you think it’s time to meet their family.” I cross my arms over my chest and sigh loudly. The more I think about this whole situation, the angrier I’m getting. I’m not letting him off the hook until he explains why he hasn’t even bothered to call me.

     “You’re absolutely right, Shelby. I’m serious about you, but my actions over the past week or so haven’t shown you that at all. I should’ve called you and admitted I needed some time instead of disappearing without a word. If it’s any consolation, I had a horrible time with my family. They all told me to come back here and make things right with you as soon as possible. No one could bear to be around me because I was so miserable. There wasn’t a day that went by that I didn’t wonder what you were doing or wish that you were there with me. I’m not perfect Shelby. I’m far from it, and I’m going to mess up and make mistakes along the way. I’m not used to being in a relationship, but I want to be in one with you more than anything. Do you think you can move past all of this and forgive me?” He looks so earnest and sweet, waiting for my answer, it’s hard to be mad at him. I still need to address the fact that Jeff came home with me and I’m sure that’s not going to go over well. Hopefully, it’s not a deal-breaker for him.

     “I need to tell you something before we talk about anything else.” He looks concerned. “Jeff came home with me for Thanksgiving. Before you freak out, you need to know that he already knew my family from when we were together. My father and brothers come to some of the Beacon home football games and they love that Jeff is the quarterback. Hailey and I went out to J.J.’s one night and Jeff was there. He apologized for shutting me out and we agreed to be friends again. I had no intention of asking him to come with me, but he wasn’t going home for the week and I felt bad. We spent most of the vacation around my brothers.” I nervously chew on my lip as I think about the best way to tell him about making out with Jeff.

“Shelby, just tell me the rest of it. Did you guys have sex?” He looks worried.

“No! We didn’t have sex. We slept in the same bed on Wednesday night and in the morning we kissed some...just kissing...nothing else.” He looks skeptical about what he’s heard. “Garrett, I’m being honest about what happened. We only kissed even though I assumed you and I were through.”

“I believe you, but it sucks knowing that you spent so much time with him. I hate that his lips were on yours, but I know that it’s my own fault. If I had just called you and let you know what I was thinking, then none of this would’ve happened. You aren’t planning on getting back with Jeff are you?”

“No, we’re just friends. I’m actually hoping to get back together with this gorgeous, stubborn guy that drives me wild. The simplest touch from him sets my body on fire and I miss him when we’re not together.” He slides over close to me and pulls me onto his lap, wrapping his arms tightly around me. He kisses my neck and rests his cheek on the top of my head.

“How about we pretend that the last nine days didn’t happen?” He asks huskily.

“I think that’s a great idea and I’m all for it.” I savor the feeling of being held by him. I know we’ve only been a couple for a very short time and yet he’s already burrowed his way into a tiny corner of my heart. Whether or not I decide to let him in any further is still to be decided. This past week or so has made me hesitant to open myself up and risk getting hurt. It’s definitely impeded my ability to trust him and it’s going to take some time to get back to the point we were at before our break. I hope he understands that I’m going to need patience from him and he needs to handle me with care or I’m not going to be able to fully invest myself in our relationship.

Chapter Eleven

Late December

     Beacon University let out for the holiday break a couple of weeks ago and Garrett and I have spent most of that time together. I haven’t slept in my own bed in over a week and when I did, he was there with me. Fortunately, Garrett is handling the upcoming holiday situation much better than he did last time. We agreed that he would come to my father’s house with me and spend the night. Tomorrow is Christmas Eve and he’ll meet my whole family. He won’t be there long enough for them to torture, he needs to leave for his brother’s house after we eat dinner. He’ll spend six days with his family and then we’re going to meet back up at his condo for New Year’s Eve. He told me he has something special planned for that night and I have no idea what it could possibly be.

    I’m riding with Garrett so we don’t have to take two cars. I’ll grab a ride back to my apartment with one of my brothers or Hailey in time for our New Year’s Eve date. I love being in his car with him. It rides so smoothly you can barely feel the bumps in the road from the highway construction that seems to be never ending in Massachusetts. The heated leather seats below me and the low hum of the radio are making me feel warm and cozy. I could easily fall asleep, but I don’t want to do that to Garrett. He’s never been to my house before and though he has GPS, it’s not the same as someone guiding you there personally. As our conversation drops off and we settle into silence, my thoughts start to wander. I’m becoming more and more apprehensive about whether or not I should tell my father that Garrett was my professor. I still don’t have a definitive plan worked out as we turn down the street I grew up on.

     We pull into the driveway and it’s almost full with my family members cars. Garrett parks behind the last vehicle in the long line. He grabs our suitcases from the trunk and effortlessly carries them as if they’re weightless.

“Has your family always lived here?” He asks as we make our way along the walkway that leads to the front door.

“Yeah, my father built this house for my mother when they were first married. She told him she wanted to have a large family and I guess he took her at her word.” I say, gesturing at the monstrosity of a house before us. “It seems large but when my brothers are here, they have a way of taking over and making it feel noticeably smaller.” I glance at Garrett and catch a hint of a grimace on his face.

“Are you worried about meeting my family?” I ask as we are almost at the front entrance.

“I wouldn’t say worried but I have a healthy amount of concern about it. It doesn’t help to know that Greyson and Aiden are professional fighters.” I giggle as I open the door.

“Here goes nothing,” he mutters under his breath. I squeeze his arm in support before chaos erupts all around us as my four brothers engulf me with hugs. A loud chorus of “Seashell” can probably be heard throughout the neighborhood. After I’m through hugging Hollis, Aiden, and Brennan, I get spun crazily around by Greyson. Once I’m back on my feet, I turn to find Garrett standing there observing us with his eyebrows raised up toward his hairline. I know my brothers are a lot to take in all at once. It’s not just their large size, all of them reaching over six feet with shoulders that nearly span the width of the doorways. They also have deep, booming voices and larger than life personalities. They have a tendency to intimidate people when they first meet them.

“Guys, this is my boyfriend, Garrett. Be nice to him, he’s one of the good guys.” I flash each of them my sternest glare to get my point across. The last thing I want is tension between them all. I’m hoping they’ll make Garrett feel welcome.

    My brothers are nice, well-mannered guys, when they want to be. When they don’t want to be...they’re total dickheads. I’ve seen the latter side of them in play on more than a few occasions. Each of them steps forward, one at a time and introduces themselves to Garrett; shaking his hand. I clench my teeth with worry because he’s being tested by them and he probably has no idea. I should’ve given him a heads up that they like to squeeze the hand of the person they’re meeting and try to get him to grimace. If he does, it’s a sign of weakness in their eyes. To Garrett’s credit, he doesn’t show the appearance of any discomfort.

    After all the introductions are over and our stuff is put away in our rooms...our separate rooms, we head downstairs. My father’s home from work now and I’m excited to introduce Garrett to him. Before I do that, I want to make sure I get to say hello to Rose. I haven’t seen her since Thanksgiving. I tug Garrett along beside me into our kitchen where she’s busy cooking over a hot stove.

     “Here she is,” she excitedly exclaims as she walks toward me with her arms outstretched. She folds me into a hug and there’s an immediate sense of comfort.

“I’ve missed you,” I tell her as I squeeze her tightly.

“Oh Seashell, I’ve missed you so much.” She pulls away from me and holds me in front of her, slowly perusing my frame with her eyes.

“Are you eating enough? You’re looking too thin.” I snort out loud. I’m definitely not in danger of malnourishment, Garrett keeps me well fed.

“Rose, I assure you I’m not starving at school.” I take hold of his hand and pull him over beside me. “I want you to meet my boyfriend, Garrett.” She smiles at me and then she pulls him in for a hug.

“It’s so nice to meet you. I never thought I’d see the day that Shelby would bring home a boyfriend.” She winks at me before turning and smiling broadly at him.

“Well, I figured he deserves to meet you all since he keeps putting up with me.” I joke.

“Rose, I’m so glad to meet you. Shelby has told me so many wonderful things about you, I feel as though I already know you.”

“The fact that she’s brought you here means that you are someone very important to her.” She looks at me knowingly and I nod in confirmation. He means more to me than I like to think about.

“She means the world to me,” He replies, sliding his arm around my waist.

***

     The introduction between Garrett and my father went better than I hoped and I can tell he already likes him. The only other boyfriend I’ve ever introduced to my family was Austin and my father was never a fan of his. I don’t think he was too surprised that our relationship ended the way it did. Apparently, he’s a way better judge of character than I am. I truly respect my father and his opinion means more to me than anyone else’s. The fact that Garrett made such a great first impression on him makes me hopeful about us lasting as a couple.

***

     Dinner, tonight with my family, was interesting as always. My brothers have a way of bringing up topics that are really not meant to be dinnertime conversation. Somehow Greyson managed to drop the bomb that Garrett is my professor. I had to clarify that
he was
and is no longer, now that the semester is over. Not that this changes our situation in the eyes of the university. There isn’t supposed to be any fraternization between the staff and students; no exceptions. I can only imagine what would happen if they found out we were a couple. We’ve done our best to be discreet, going out together in other towns, instead of the city. Most of the time, we prefer to order some takeout and cuddle on Garrett’s couch, while watching whatever movie we decide on. He worries I’ll get bored from staying in because I’m younger than him. He seems to think I need to be out whooping it up with my friends and that’s just not true. I try to make him see that spending time with him is my favorite thing to do. He’s intelligent and interesting to talk to and his sense of humor is razor sharp and extremely dry. He has a tendency to be more serious about life than what I’m used to. My brothers are the exact opposite and Jeff is very similar to them. I like to think that I provide Garrett with some much-needed levity and he makes me feel loved. That’s all I’ve ever really wanted...someone who feels as strongly about me, as I do about them. Finding that balance of love in a relationship is one of the most difficult things.

    I can’t say my father or my brothers were happy to hear about the origin of our relationship or the risks involved with us continuing it. I know they’ll worry about me, but this connection that Garrett and I share is bigger than the both of us and I don’t see it ending anytime soon. I think he could be “the one,” but I’m afraid to even acknowledge that thought. The superstitious part of me doesn’t want to jinx it.

***

     We just had our Christmas Eve dinner and Garrett has to leave in another hour or so. We haven’t had a chance to exchange gifts yet. My brothers have been purposely up our asses since we arrived here yesterday afternoon. They haven’t given us a moment's peace. 

    Garrett helped me clear off the dining room table and now we’re sitting on the large sectional in the theater room. He and I are cuddled up against each other enjoying the solitude that we’ve been missing for the past two days.

“Do you know how much I’m going to miss you over the next six days?” I shake my head.

“How much?” I ask, teasingly.

“More than you’ll ever know,” He whispers as he leans forward to brush his lips against mine. “I’m looking forward to New Year’s Eve when I’ll have you naked and stretched out on my bed.” He groans as he connects his lips with mine, kissing me passionately. I grip his hair in my fists and press my body into his. When the kiss is over, we’re both panting. I want to climb on top of him, rip his clothes off, and have my wicked way with him. I know it’s not an option, though. We’re in my father’s house and there are eyes everywhere.

    “We should exchange gifts now,” I mention, trying to calm my libido and resist the urge to strip him naked. I sit up and retrieve the two gift bags that contain his gifts.

“You go first,” He tells me as he hands me a small box wrapped in gold foil and topped with a tiny red bow. I tear into the paper and drop it on the floor before removing the cover off of the little white box. Nestled inside on some cotton is a key. I look at him questioningly, waiting for him to explain.

“This is a key to my condo. I want you to come and go as you please. I want you there all the time, but I know you still need your space. This is my way of giving you the option of being over as much as you’d like. You’re welcome to hang out there when I’m at work or whenever you want. Can you tell I just want you with me as much as possible?” He jokes. I smile and kiss him gently on his lips.

“I love being at your place and I promise I’ll spend more time there. Now that I have my own key I may be waiting for you when you get home from work.” I waggle my eyebrows at him.

“I love the sound of that, especially if it means you’ll be waiting for me, naked,” He growls and playfully bites my neck, making me shriek and giggle.

     “Okay, it’s your turn to open up a present. I hand him the smaller of the two gift bags. He removes the tissue paper I’ve placed on top and pulls out a silver picture frame. I had our names engraved on it and there’s a photo of us that Hailey took one night when we were dressed up to go out for dinner. It’s a great picture and we look ridiculously happy in it. Garrett’s studying the picture intently as I watch him, waiting for his reaction. His mouth breaks out in a smile and he pulls me in for a hug.

“I love this so much, Shelby. You’re so beautiful, sometimes it’s difficult to grasp the fact that you’re mine. How did I get so lucky?” I get a secret thrill at him calling me his, even though I probably shouldn’t. As we separate, he reaches for my next present. It’s a small box and it’s wrapped in the same gold paper but the bow on this one is green. When I tear off the paper, I find a black velvet box, typical of what jewelry comes in. I know it can’t be an engagement ring, we’re doing well, but we’re nowhere near ready for that. I look at him before I open the cover. He has a hint of a smile on his lips and I know he’s chomping at the bit for me to reveal what’s inside. I open the top and find a pair of elegant gemstone earrings. They are brown stones and they shimmer beautifully in the light.

“They’re chocolate diamonds,” Garrett mentions. “The color reminded me of your eyes. I knew you had diamond earrings from your father so I wanted to get you something different, but I wanted it to be something you’d never buy for yourself.” I stare down at my gift and fight off the tears that want to escape. It’s no use holding them back, they’re coming too quickly and soon are flowing down my cheeks. I lock eyes with Garrett as he wipes them from beneath my eyes.

“Thank you, I love them so much. They’re exquisite.” I take them out of the box and replace the earrings I had on with my new ones. He cups my face in both of his palms and stares deeply into my eyes. He looks like he wants to say something, but he remains silent. I place both of my hands on his waist and he leans forward to nuzzle my nose with his, never losing eye contact.

“I love you, Shelby,” He whispers huskily. “I’ve been waiting to tell you because I didn’t want to scare you away, but I can’t wait any longer. I don’t expect you to say it back, I just wanted you to know.” My mouth falls open in shock and I act as though I’ve been struck dumb. What he said was so unexpected I’m struggling to form a coherent thought. It takes me a minute to answer him but when I do I know it’s worth the wait.

“I love you too, Garrett. I love you so much.” He crashes his lips into mine before I’m able to say another word. Our tongues are hungry for each other as they move together. He pulls me into his lap and keeps kissing me for another minute.