War Torn Love (27 page)

             
We tried to help
-
out these families as they passed through, Poppa and Momma had taken it upon themselves to take in a family, who desperately needed help. The family we took in was one of those men - and his family that came and met with Poppa. They were quite lovely; they had a twelve-year-old son and a four-year-old daughter - she was so precious, and they were both
well-mannered
children. They had to all share the one room, but they were very thankful. Luckily, we had some food to spare. Abram’s parents also took in a family. They had four
children, my mother-in-law was very happy to have children around. Luckily, they had two bedrooms to spare. We got the kids all enrolled in school.

             
Still more tragic stories against our people started leaking out through unofficial channels.
Officially,
these actions were denied - I think people just did not want to admit what they saw. I do not want this to come off sounding the wrong way. But when I continued hearing the reports, I began question if this was such a good time in a uncertain peace in Europe, to even be thinking of bringing in a new life into this cruel world - especially a Jewish child, who could be mercilessly mistreated for simply being born Jewish. I tried turning to God for answers. When I had thought there was no one else around in the store, and I was having a good cry when it was my Momma caught me. I hoped I could be half as great as mother as her, she came over put her arms around me, brushed my hair out of my eyes, and wiped my tears away, then she smiled and clearly wanted to find out why I was so upset. She never judged me. I was so pleased to see her - she had perfect timing. Maybe God was answering my prayer. I needed her words of wisdom about now, and her insight to cheer me up.

             
“What’s wrong Hana? What has my girl so upset? Are you feeling ok, you have not been over doing it have you? I knew it - you have been working to many hours! I will speak to you Poppa tonight.”

             
“Oh Momma it’s not the hours,” Tears now streaming down my cheeks once more.  As I tried talking, I had that sort of stutter crying voice. I put my arms around Momma, “it’s all this business with Hitler - he has me
really worried that maybe I shouldn’t have gotten pregnant. I think I was in such a rush to get pregnant, that I was being selfish; I may have not thought it all through. Momma not now, with Hitler, it would seem all us Jews throughout Europe could eventually be in danger if he is not stopped. You have seen what the Nazis are capable of. Momma I have a bad feeling not all this is going to turn out well! I had a dream last night there was a great war, and so many were suffering. The Jews were being treated much worse than anything we have heard about, it was unimaginable.”

             
“Hana, you know I’ll tell you a story about life.
You’re
being pregnant… - you’re blessed with a true gift from God, now having this child, you have to accept that, and be happy about it, because now that this life is growing inside you, it comes first. This child of yours has to always come first. And I assure you, the first time you hold your baby in your arms, and you look down into its little face - you will never question this decision again. Having a baby will be the greatest thing a woman can do. It’s because of what’s happening out there in the world - things that we do not have control over, you grow to understand having this baby is only helping show the world that we as a people are still confident, and strong enough as a people to carry on. No matter what, that is the way it is with our people. At one point or another through our long history as a people, one
empire, tribe,
or another has persecuted us. You are seeing there is a lot of hatred in this world but it is something we have faced before.  Hana love, a child is a gift from God, a baby always lights up the world and you are going to make such a wonderful mother - you’re a very loving person, that’s all you have to remember. So do not worry about
things that have not happen yet, or may never happen, things we do not have control over, ok!” She hugged me tighter, kissing my hair as I sobbed. I cried it all out in her arms, before she continued.”
             
One more thing, you better be prepared for, Sweetie you are going to discover you are going to be extra emotional while you’re pregnant, so don’t be alarmed, that’s all this all is now. I will tell you the only thing you need, and quite frankly should be worry about right now is taking care of yourself, your health, eating right, and not over doing it. Remember events around the world will come to pass whether you want them or not. God will watch over you, do not ask me how, but I have always known you were extra special for some reason, you have an amazing inner - strength unlike I have ever witnessed.”

             
“Thanks Momma you’re probably right, it’s just probably my hormones is all. You always know how to cheer me up - Momma is it bad to say that I’m scared of becoming a mother?”

             
“No, not at all, I would be shocked if you were not scared. All mothers are, do not worry. That too shall pass. I will let you in on a secret, when I was pregnant with your sister, I was terrified, I was an absolute wreck. I drove your poor father nuts. I did not think that I could do it. I had nearly asked my mother to raise Marym.”

             
“Not you Momma, you’re the greatest!”

             
“Yes my daughter even me - we learn as we go, we grow into being mothers.”

             
There was a mounting concern that the Nazi’s would invade Poland, and secretly the country’s military began to mobilize.
Nevertheless,
Hitler has promised there would be no more invasions. So we all felt a bit better, especially after both France and Britain have promised to go to war with Germany if the Nazis invaded my country. They had
already begun calling up men.  But needless to say, our families had began making tentative plans on the remote chance Germany broke the promise and invaded Poland. We did not want to be caught off guard. We would try to
immigrate
to America if possible.

             
I know I tried getting on with my own life the best I could.  Everyday Abram did his best to cheer me up, and tried to make sure I had a good day. I started spending a great deal of time with my nieces, to practice being a mommy, changing diapers and all of the care that went with that. I loved every moment I was spending with them. I also knitted baby clothing.

             
I don’t think I could have made it, if it wasn’t for the love and support of my husband. He was a very strong person. He always tried to see the good in all things. He never gave up on anything - if he had set his mind to something. Like his boxing, or the farm. Abram was always been there for me when I needed him the most. He built me up as a person and helped me believe in myself, when I did not. He always knew just the right thing to say to me, to cheer me up, when I was down. Never once did he belittle me for this, or take advantage. I know some times he seemed too good to be true, but he never gave me reason to believe otherwise. And that foundation kept me strong in
the years following. Little did I know back then that I would need to draw on that
strength?

             
That was at least until he found out he was going to become a father. Suddenly, I was this fragile piece of glass, unable to move without him fussing. This whole Daddy thing has
gone
to my husband’s head; he was far too protective and smothered me to an extent. All he talked about, baby this, baby that, I am excited too, but he really went above and beyond. I had to approach his mother, and had her talk to him. Tough as my husband is, he was a real Momma’s boy.

             
Maryn and I had lunch together the other day. I told her about Abram’s recent pre-Daddy behavior; I wanted some advice on how to handle it, she said, “Oh all new dads get this way with their first born, but by the second, they’re much better, they know what to expect. I went through the same thing as you. They are really not as tough as we give them credit for, I would like to see them try being pregnant for nine months, and then give birth - trust me, they would not be able to handle it.”

             
We both began to laugh - I laughed so hard I peed my pants!

CHAPTER TEN

           
       
“The German and My husband!”

             
It was the big day, the family and I, all of us preparing to leave for Abram’s big fight I had been loathing its arrival secretly, it been keeping me up at night.  It was being held in Warsaw. I was so excited not for the fight but to be traveling anywhere but this town, especially to the big city of Warsaw. I was not the only one excited about going. And it was not just my own family, I think half our town was also going to be traveling there, watching their adopted son win against the German. It put our small town in the national
spotlight
. There was mention by the Mayor of actually declaring the day of the fight as a holiday.

             
It was marvelous just how much press, and importance there has been placed over this fight - drawing the attention in the entire country in the week leading up to this fight. It was as if this fight was actually Poland going up against their neighbors to the west, Germany. Not too much of a stretch to be making these days, with the way in which Germany have been acting. And to be honest, that made me a little sad. And proud, secretly – my Abram was going into the fight of his life. 

             
I think both Abram and I were nervous about everything that this fight represented - so much pressure was being put on my husband’s shoulders - the desires and
hopes of the entire country, knowing him he certainly did not want to let anyone down. The entire country now was expecting him to win. Neither of us slept well with in the days leading up to the fight. I know I should have, but I couldn’t. Even though we had been being put up in one of the nicest hotels in all Warsaw, certainly the most comfortable bed I had ever slept in my entire life, the bed was so snug, I found it very difficult to settle. When this was all over though, it was going to be difficult going back to my own bed. I had never imagined a bed could be this comfortable. When I laid down, I slowly melted into the mattress surface. It was a four-poster bed, with a canopy. The ceiling was twelve feet high. The suite we were staying in not only had the bed, but a desk and chair to write, two sitting chairs and even a couch - all so unbelievably comfortable, with a lovely flowery print. The suite was at least half the size of our house back home. There was our own balcony that had a bird’s eye view of the city, especially since we were on the tenth floor.  We sat higher than the buildings around us. Then there was the bathroom. All in a marble and granites of assorted colors. A huge soaking tub, big enough that both my husband and I could take a bath in.  I have fond memories of those baths. In fact we made love right there in the water. It was
absolutely
-
divine
. They had a French toilet called the bidet. It washes your undercarriage after you have gone the bathroom. I must admit I sort of was getting attached to that, especially now that I was pregnant, it was slowly getting harder to achieve the simpler tasks.  They supplied us with lovely terrycloth robes, fresh linen every single day. In addition, imagine a house cleaner service. I did not have to do a
thing. I could have gotten used to this real fast, but truthfully this was not my world - I was a simple person, and was happy with that fact.