Watched (4 page)

Of course, the question was how she would tell him while distracted by thoughts of how spicy-sweet he had tasted.

She had spent the last two days trying to clear her mind, thinking it would wear off eventually. Alexandra had been distracted at work, reliving the kiss over and over again until the nurses started to ask her if she was feeling alright. How could she tell them she was fantasizing about a man nine years younger?

As she pushed a hand through her hair, Alexandra heard the low rumble in the pipes which meant the shower was on in Hunter’s apartment. Images of him in the shower, water sluicing down his muscular back, filled her mind. This didn’t help at all. At least it meant she had a little more time before Mrs. Dail cornered Hunter.

She stalked into her bedroom to bathe and change, closing her door against the sound of the shower. If only it was so easy to shut out her body’s reaction.

She filled the bath with steaming water and sank in with a sigh. The heat melted away tension she carried from the hospital, but she fidgeted unhappily. She couldn’t let her mind wander, or she’d start imagining him again. She soaped up her loofah, but her mind kept returning to the kiss.

No kiss had the right to be so passionate, and wake those kinds of feelings in her. He had seemed as aroused as she was, and she wondered how long it had been since he last had sex. Maybe it was that simple, but it had seemed so real. Alexandra turned her attention to scrubbing herself clean with the loofah. She was reading too much into it.

It had changed everything between them, and she had to find a way to fix it. No matter how good his kisses were, he was a better friend. She wasn’t willing to risk losing him.

A heavy pounding at the door sent Alexandra’s adrenaline crashing through the ceiling. The comb in her wet hair rattled to the ground as she jumped in startlement. She muttered under her breath as she switched off the roar of the hair dryer. Her after-bath routine was sacred; it gave her a chance to unwind. Whoever was interrupting was going to be sorry. The pounding continued, thundering through the apartment as she hurried to the door. She yanked it open and stepped back, an angry outburst forming on her lips. It died the moment she saw the person on the other side.

“Expecting someone else?” John asked. He leaned lazily against the doorframe as he studied her expression. His neat hair, never a strand out of place, formed a golden swoop over his ice blue eyes. His designer suit didn’t hold the slightest wrinkle. It didn’t surprise her. His socialite parents had trained him to look good in a suit since infancy. He was an attractive man with charm to spare, but he had never affected her the way Hunter did.

She crossed her arms defensively over her chest, uncomfortable under her ex-husband’s scrutiny. He lived over two hundred miles away, what was he doing on her doorstep? The demand of what he was doing there gave way to a flare of motherly panic. “Did something happen to Simon?”

John shook his head, shoving his hands in his pockets and narrowing his eyes at her. The muscles between her shoulders tensed. He had used the same tactic many times during their marriage to drag a reaction from her, but she wasn’t in the mood today. The sooner she found out what he wanted, the sooner he would leave.

She raked a hand through her damp hair, clearing her throat. “What are you doing here?”

“What do you think you’re doing,” he grated finally, his face flushing red as she stared at him in confusion. “Do you have any idea what this fling with your little boy toy will do to Simon? Do you care? Why would you kiss him, if you did?”

“What?” How did he know? Her eyes widened, and she stepped back as he advanced. Alexandra glanced toward the kitchen, where her knife block sat on the counter. She had never been afraid of him before, but he seemed different now.

“Don’t try to deny it,” he spat, stepping close to her until he was inches away. “Simon called and told me all about it.”

A cold feeling rooted itself in her spine. She hadn’t told Simon about the kiss. She hadn’t told anyone. She lifted her chin. “What I do is my business, John,” she snapped. “Don’t you dare come to my home and lecture me about who I kiss.”

Unconsciously, she turned and looked behind her toward the balcony. Someone could easily have seen the two of them, if… she shivered. If they were watching the balcony. He wouldn’t. John wasn’t the crazed stalker type.

The cold feeling shot out through her limbs when John grasped her elbows and shook her. “Damn you,” he shouted. “What were you thinking? You planning on falling into his bed now?”

She broke his hold easily, glaring. What was wrong with him? “Get out of my home. My affairs are not your concern.” She winced at her choice of words.

John’s face flushed a darker shade of red. His hands pressed to the sides of his head, the muscles in his jaw twitching fast. “Look, I’m sorry.”

Alexandra froze, searching John’s face as his words sank in. “You’re - what?” John never apologized. She hadn’t thought he could, even in the early days of their relationship when he was smooth and thoughtful.

“I’ve been unfair to you.” John dropped his hands to his sides, palms forward like a supplicant at an altar. “I’ve been rude and hurtful, and dropping by uninvited like this isn’t a good way to prove I don’t want to upset you.” He took a deep breath, raising his icy blue eyes to hers. “But you’re the mother of my son. You’re the one who decides how he grows up, and that’s important to me.”

Mind numb, Alexandra tried to understand. “Do you want more time with Simon?”

John laughed, and she couldn’t decide if it was at her or something else. “No, I don’t think he wants that, and I don’t want to push him. I just want to know what’s going on in here. I want to just take a look around, see for myself you don’t have any guests I’d disapprove of, and everything is all right.” As he took a step forward, she shoved him back toward the door. He staggered back, his eyes going wide at the force of her push.

“Disapprove of?” Alexandra tried to slam the door shut, but John wedged his designer shoe against the door to hold it open. “Who do you think you are? You can’t control me just because Simon lives here.”

John raised his hands, and she flinched as he placed them on her shoulders, a fatherly look on his face. “Look, you’re taking this the wrong way, or maybe I said it wrong, I don’t know.” He smiled calmly as another shock passed through her. John, taking blame for a disagreement? “I’ve changed, Alexandra. I think we can work toward being a family again, if you’ll let us. For Simon’s sake. But I can’t do that if you insist on letting another man into your life.”

Swirling nausea nearly blocked out her next words, but she forced them out. “A family?” What kind of nightmare was this?

“Well, yes. It would be good for Simon to have his father, and I’m a better man now. I can be for him what I never was, and what no other man could ever be.” He paused, looking intently into her eyes. “There would be some changes. I’ve been talking to my therapist, and I think I know what caused all my anger and resentment.” Alexandra was still standing in stunned disbelief as he took a deep breath and let it out in a rush. “I was pretending to love you, pretending you attracted me. I wouldn’t do that anymore. You’d only hear the truth from me, all the time, and you’d know I meant it.”

A knee in the groin. That’s all it would take. She could shove him out the door while he was doubled over in pain and lock it, then turn her music up loud and ignore imaginary noises, sexy landlords and self-righteous ex husbands. Plus, it would feel good to direct all this rage at the man who had caused it. Of course, physical violence against John would just spawn an army of lawyers. Again.

Clamping down on her raging anger, she pulled her shoulders free of John’s hands. Her arm shot out, pointing down the hallway and barring the door from any more attempts to enter her apartment. “Get out, or I’m calling the cops.”

“Don’t bother.” Hunter’s deep voice broke through the argument, making both of them jump. He lounged against the wall of the narrow hallway, his hair and bare chest still damp from the shower. “I’ll escort him out myself.”

John turned to face him, seeming to size the other man up. Hunter was easily a head taller than John, and his muscular shoulders seemed to dwarf her ex-husband. Hunter’s glare flicked from John to Alexandra. He looked as furious as she felt, and she was shaking with anger.

John grunted. “I see. I’ll be in touch.” He stared at Alexandra a few moments longer before he turned to push his way past Hunter.

Hunter didn’t move, his glare unreadable as he watched her ex-husband retreat down the hall. Alexandra stared at Hunter, torn between interest and frustration. She’d tried to convince John to leave repeatedly, and Hunter had done it in a sentence, without even having to move. Jerk. As her gaze fell to where his jeans hugged his slim hips, she yanked her stare away. What was wrong with her? She could stare at him later, there were more pressing concerns right now.

Like what to do about an ex-husband who had just shown up on her doorstep to promise a marriage devoid of love for the sake of their son.

Hunter cleared his throat. “I didn’t mean to overhear, but there was shouting…” he trailed off with a shrug.

Of course. She nodded in understanding. Hunter was here to take care of a problem in his apartment complex. A problem she had caused, even if indirectly. She couldn’t even handle her old relationships, requiring him to step in and take over for her. The thought of falling into his arms again seemed silly now, the idle fantasies of a child.

Her nipples tightened at the thought of those arms around her again. The sensitive buds brushed against the fabric of her shirt with every breath. She crossed her arms over the telltale marks on her chest and cursed herself for not wearing a bra. The way he’d kissed her made her feel desired and feminine, but she knew better than to think it was anything but comfort.

I was pretending to love you, pretending you attracted me.

John’s words rang in her ear. Was Hunter doing the same thing? Pretending at attraction with her, a much older woman? Would she even be able to tell the difference?

Alexandra flushed with embarrassment as he turned his gaze to hers. A shock of awareness rippled through her, followed by anger and frustration. His worried look snapped her mind back to his intrusion.

She could have handled John on her own, if Hunter hadn’t intervened. John had never been so angry, but she’d always calmed him down before. Instead, she was the woman who had loud arguments in the hall until her landlord showed up. And here he was, tall, dark and brooding over her problems. Alexandra wanted to slam the door and cry alone. She offered a brittle smile as she inched the door closed.

A worried look replaced the darkly brooding expression. He stepped forward, holding the door open with one hand. With the other he reached forward to cup her cheek, his hand warm against her face. “Are you okay?”

She shook his hand off, glaring at him. “I’m fine. I can take care of myself, you don’t need to come out and play superhero.” He looked struck, staring at her. His look hurt her more, and despite the warning bells that she was going too far, she pressed forward. “What, it never occurred to you that I could handle the man I lived with for thirteen years? There’s no reason for you to interfere.”

Hunter’s lips thinned. “I was worried he would hurt you. Is that so wrong?” He shoved his hands into his pockets, dark brows drawing together.

“You should have trusted me to look after my own safety,” she snapped. “If I’m in trouble, I’ll call for help. If not, please leave me alone.”

A sick feeling settled in her stomach as she pushed the door, closing it in his face.

CHAPTER FIVE

Hunter

Hunter closed the door of his apartment with deliberate slowness, then threw himself onto the couch and propped his feet on the coffee table. What the hell had just happened? Somehow, the whole rescue attempt had blown up in his face.

If she had just given him a chance to explain, he could have fixed everything. He was sure of it.

Just as soon as he figured it out for himself.

He’d meant to support her, but had he taken over? She’d seemed so calm and in control, even when anger glittered in her eyes. When she’d seen Hunter, her look of uncertainty and shame caught him by surprise.

You don’t need to come out and play superhero.

He rubbed his scalp roughly to smooth out the knots of unease. Did she see him that way? As someone who swooped in to save her whenever the mood struck him, and only showed up to fix a problem?

Moments from their years-long association raced through his mind. He was sure he didn’t avoid her until something went wrong. There must have been at least one time when he didn’t try to fix her problems. The trouble was he couldn’t remember any of them right now.

He leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees and placing his head in his hands. Had he ever even given her a chance to help him? She was always so open and honest with him, but had he returned the favor?

A resounding no dropped into the pit of his stomach and dissolved into twitchy agitation as he stood and paced the floor. What an idiot he’d been. Of course she wasn’t interested in him, he’d never told her anything about himself. She didn’t know anything about him, his family, anything but vague references to his ex-fiancée. Now she’d told him to leave her alone until there was another problem. She probably wouldn’t think about it much, especially since it seemed that was what he would have done anyway.