We Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus (11 page)

Alex cast Jaclyn a blame-filled look, and Jaclyn’s false smile faltered. But Cole put a hand on the small of her back, a silent communication of support, and she became more determined than ever to finesse her way through this uncomfortable meeting.

“Where’s Dad?” Alex asked, as the children burst into the house babbling excitedly.

“He went out with some friends tonight,” Dolores said.

“Where?” Mackenzie pressed.

“I want to see him,” Alyssa said.

“I don’t know, dears. He’ll be home shortly, though, I’m sure.”

Jaclyn thought she could guess where Terry and his friends were. They hadn’t changed how they spent their weekends in the past twelve years. She doubted they’d change in the next. They were all going nowhere fast, and that more than anything had fueled her disappointment in Terry when he was her husband.

But she didn’t have to worry about Terry anymore. She was steering her own ship now. Being in control was a little scary, but it was also unbelievably liberating.

“Here’s their stuff,” Jaclyn said to no one in particular, when Burt and Dolores left the door standing open and allowed the children to press them back into the house. No one had acknowledged Cole. No one had invited them in or thanked them for bringing the children to Feld. But Jaclyn hadn’t expected any great show of gratitude. She hadn’t come to town as a favor for the Wentworths, anyway. She’d done it for her children.

“We’ll pick them up tomorrow at six o’clock, grab a burger and head out. We don’t want to get home too late.”

At first Jaclyn thought Burt and Dolores were going to ignore this statement, as well, but finally Dolores glanced up long enough to respond with a clipped “That’s fine.”

Eager to be gone, Jaclyn put her hand on Cole’s forearm to draw him away, but just as they reached the outer glow of the porch light, her ex-father-in-law addressed her.

“Terry said you had a new man. This him?”

“I beg your pardon?”

Burt angled his gray, buzz-cut toward Cole and shoved his hands in his pockets to rattle his change. He wasn’t a particularly tall man, but his shoulders were wide and his hands big, the effect of which gave him a square solid look. “This your boyfriend?”

Jaclyn let go of Cole’s arm, only now realizing, amid her preoccupation, that she was still hanging on to him. “Um, no, Cole’s my boss and an old friend. You might remember him. He went to high school with Terry and me. He’s the oldest of the Perrini boys.”

“Perrini boys, huh?” Burt squinted at Cole, obviously sizing him up. “I remember him, all right. Caught him and his brothers out here ruining my lawn with their truck tires one night.”

If she’d heard about that incident, Jaclyn didn’t remember it, but she didn’t put it past Cole. Everyone did that kind of thing in high school. It was how the teenagers of Feld created their own fun in a town that had one theater and no mall. And Cole had been as wild as they came. He was always in trouble, unpredictable in every regard, except one—if anyone messed with his brothers, there’d be hell to pay from Cole.

“I guess we all did a few stupid things like that,” she said, hoping to mediate so the conversation wouldn’t turn ugly.

But Cole clearly wasn’t interested in her help. “That must have been someone else,” he said flatly.

Burt rocked up onto the balls of his feet and jingled his change again. “Oh, yeah? Seems to me it was you.”

“No, I was at the 7-Eleven that night. I remember because Terry got busted for stealing beer, right after he threw up at the front door.” Cole smiled. “But maybe that incident slipped your mind, since nothing ever came of it. You knew the police officers involved and fixed things with the store clerk, too, I guess, because Terry got off, just like he always did.”

Burt clamped his mouth shut. He’d been trying to put Cole down, to insinuate something about his background and poor upbringing, but Cole had quickly and easily turned the tables on him. Peeling out on someone’s lawn was one thing. Stealing beer from a store was something else, and Terry had been underage, though Jaclyn knew his father cared more about the embarrassment Terry had caused him than any moral implications.

“I guess boys will be boys, huh?” Cole said. “See you tomorrow at six.” Slinging an arm around Jaclyn, he walked her to his Navigator and opened the door for her to climb in. To the casual observer, she knew his actions made them appear closer than they were, but she didn’t care. Cole was putting Burt on notice that she wasn’t alone anymore. He was lending her his support, and it felt…well, wonderful. Having Cole with her was like putting the wind at her back. She hadn’t realized just how tough it was to weather Terry and his family’s ill will alone.

“Thanks,” she said, as soon as he’d climbed in and started the truck.

“You don’t have to thank me. I didn’t do anything,” he said, but he took her hand, and Jaclyn gladly entwined her fingers with his. The last few minutes had united them somehow, made them allies against the Wentworths and Terry—even Feld.

“Where should we stay for the night?” he asked.

There were only three motels in town, mom-and-pop es
tablishments with small, cabin-like rooms. None was very expensive. None was very nice. But they were good enough for Jaclyn. She was just glad to put some distance between her and the ranch.

“Let’s see if the Starlight Motel still has its Jacuzzi,” she suggested.

He hesitated before pulling out of the circular drive and onto the road. “I didn’t bring a suit.”

Jaclyn smiled, feeling wild and free and on top of the world for the first time in what seemed like an eternity. It was as though all the responsibility she’d shouldered for so long had suddenly disappeared, allowing her to be young again. “Neither did I.”

C
OLE GAVE
J
ACLYN
an incredulous look. When they were in high school, the Starlight Motel was known popular for its private Jacuzzi, which couples used in half-hour increments. Cole had taken Rochelle there on their honeymoon—he hadn’t been able to afford anything better—but strangely enough, he could scarcely remember that night now. All he could think about was Jaclyn, the girl he’d wanted from the beginning.

“You must be joking,” he said. “You’d never go skinny-dipping.”

“Why not?”

“You’re not the type.”

“Oh, yeah? From what I heard, you went skinny-dipping often enough when we were in high school. Why am I so different?”

With the engine still idling, he propped one arm over the steering wheel and turned so he could see her better. “A lot of people went skinny-dipping in high school. You weren’t one of them.”

She frowned, and glanced away. “Maybe I’m tired of being so straitlaced. Maybe I want to do something daring and fun for a change. It’s not like I’m suggesting we share a room. I’d never get involved with you. We work together.”

Cole might have thought the same thing at least a million times, but somehow he didn’t like the sound of those sentiments coming from her. Maybe it was an ego issue, be
cause she hadn’t wanted him before, when he’d wanted her. Or maybe it was because a part of him still hoped to change her mind.

No, that couldn’t be the case. He wasn’t interested in taking on the responsibility of a woman with children. He’d raised his share of kids, knew how tough it was. And stepparenting would be even worse, what with Terry and his family still in the picture.

He put the truck in gear and pulled onto the road. “You’re too—” he looked at her “—shy,” he finished, but he was trying to talk her out of the idea for
his
sake, not hers. She might be able to strip, climb into a hot tub with him and dress again without feeling the slightest desire for anything more to happen between them, but he doubted he’d be so…hormonally removed.

“I’m not shy,” she protested.

“Has any man seen you naked besides Terry?”

She shrugged and said sheepishly, “No.”

“See? You won’t go through with it.”

“Fine. Forget it. Don’t go to the Starlight. It was just a passing impulse.”

He gave her a knowing smile. “That’s what I thought.”

“What?”

“That you’d back out before we ever reached the hot tub.”

“I wouldn’t have backed out if you hadn’t…never mind.” She folded her arms and turned toward the window, giving Cole the opportunity to admire her profile. He was with Jackie Rasmussen, his high-school heartthrob. After ten years, she was finally in
his
truck and not with Terry. He thought of her in his English class, drinking a cola at the football game, sitting in an assembly with her friends. How many times had he dreamed of having her as his girl? In Reno, those dreams felt like ancient history, another chapter in his life. But in Feld, they seemed like only yes
terday. If he wasn’t careful, he could feel the same longing for her right now….

The Starlight was coming up on their right. Cole saw the sign lit up with shooting stars and the words Private Jacuzzi, and determined to drive past in favor of the Sand Mountain Inn down the street. But when they reached the entrance, he found himself turning in and parking the Navigator in a slot marked Office.

“I thought we were going someplace else,” she said, her eyes widening.

He grinned. For a moment there, he’d almost done the safe, sensible thing and played it straight. But Jaclyn was the only person he’d ever consistently wanted and, despite the risks, he wasn’t about to miss out on something this good.

“I think you’re right,” he said. “I think it’s time you did something a little wild and crazy. And I’m just the man to do it with.”

W
HAT HAD SHE GOTTEN INTO
?
Suddenly as shy as Cole had accused her of being, and more than a little embarrassed, Jaclyn folded her arms over her shirt, inhaling the smell of the chlorine in the hot tub, while Cole hung the Occupied sign on the gate. When she’d suggested it, her idea of skinny-dipping had seemed tantalizingly dangerous and incredibly exciting—something impulsive and entirely out-of-character for her normally conservative self. She’d wanted to feel young and attractive again, probably because she’d felt old and tired for too long. And skinny-dipping hadn’t seemed like such a big deal. Teenagers did it all the time, right?

Then, why did taking off her shorts and tank top seem so terrifying now?

Probably because she had a couple of stretch marks no one but Terry had seen, while Cole’s body was perfect. At
least, he looked perfect in his clothes—tall and muscular and as darkly handsome as ever.

Cole seemed to sense her sudden reluctance; he caught her eye and smiled reassuringly. His manner said,
Trust me, I’ll take care of everything,
and she wanted to believe him. She did believe him. So far, he’d never let her down. But…

“Having second thoughts?” he asked before removing his T-shirt.

Jaclyn glanced at the steam curling off the small, round hot tub, and was tempted to rise to the challenge in Cole’s voice. He didn’t believe she’d go through with it, and she wanted to surprise him by peeling off her tank top as though she was as confident and brazen as she sometimes wished.

But she couldn’t do it. He was her boss. Regardless of what had happened at the Wentworth ranch, she was suddenly very aware of their true relationship. And she was also afraid of the attraction she felt toward him. Getting naked would hardly help douse that.

She bit her lip and curled her nails into her palms. “I guess I’m all talk, huh? Still a Goody Two-shoes.”

He grinned. “There’s nothing wrong with that, Jackie. I’m surprised you came this far. You want to go back to our rooms?”

Jaclyn wasn’t quite ready to turn in for the night. Despite her hesitancy to disrobe, she still wanted to be with Cole. He generally avoided or ignored her at the office, but she had his full attention now. And it was a heady experience.

“Can we sit out here and put our feet in the water?”

“Why not?” He kicked off his sandals and, rolling up the legs of his knee-length shorts situated himself on the edge of the hot tub.

“The water feels good, doesn’t it,” he said as she joined him.

The hot water did feel good, but sitting next to Cole felt even better. Jaclyn smiled and nodded. She knew she
should keep her distance from this man, even with her clothes on, but he was so…alluring. Certainly it couldn’t hurt to sit close enough to enjoy the masculine smell of him.

“How long did you say you’ve been divorced?” he asked after a few seconds of silence.

“A year,” she told him.

“Have you started dating again?”

“No.”

“Don’t your weekends get lonely?”

“Are you kidding? I’ve got three kids and some old neighbors to keep me company,” she said flippantly. “What more could a woman want?”

“A love life.” He dipped his hand in the water and ran it through his black hair, causing water droplets to roll down his face. “Aren’t you interested in getting married again? Or did the divorce burn you too badly?”

Jaclyn didn’t want to think about her love life. Otherwise, she might be tempted to improve it tonight, with Cole. She wasn’t completely sure he’d be game, but he
had
pulled into the Starlight, instead of going somewhere else.

“Maybe someday. Not soon,” she said, staring at the pink polish on her toenails, as the water bubbled around her calves.

He nodded and leaned back to look at the star-filled sky. “What type of man would you look for next time?” he asked.

“I don’t exactly have a job description. I know it would take someone willing to love my children, and someone willing to put up with my ex and his parents, for my children’s sake. That’s a pretty tall order.”

“I don’t think you need someone who is willing to put up with your ex and his family. I think you need someone to keep them honest.”

She chuckled and kicked her feet gently back and forth.
“They’re not used to running up against any resistance. The divorce itself came as a pretty big shock to them.”

“I can tell. You don’t ever worry about them taking the children and not bringing them back, do you?”

“No. For that to happen, Terry would have to take off with them and stay in hiding, and he’s not about to leave Feld and his parents and the ranch. It’s his future. He’s planned on taking over for his father his whole life. He did try to gain full custody while we were getting the divorce, though, by claiming I’m an unfit mother. Fortunately that didn’t work. We wound up with joint custody, so unless they want to risk kidnapping charges, the Wentworths are stuck with sharing.”

Closing her eyes, Jaclyn reveled in the heat that was working its way up her legs and relaxing every muscle. “How come you’ve never remarried?” she asked.

“I’m not husband or father material.”

“Really? How long were you with Rochelle?”

“Nine months.”

“And nine months taught you that?”

“Believe me, nine months has never seemed so long.”

“Why?”

He sighed. “I don’t know. I was young, I was stupid. Take your pick.”

“Did you love her?” Jaclyn asked. She felt awkward posing the question, wondered if it was too personal—but sitting alone together with their feet in the steamy tub seemed kind of intimate, and she’d always wanted to know.

“No.”

His unqualified answer surprised her. “Ever?”

“There was a time, right at first, when I thought I might be able to love her and make the marriage work. But then things changed.”

Jaclyn waited, hoping he’d elaborate, but he didn’t. “Were you still trying to take care of your brothers?”

“Yeah. My mother was dying. My father had had his
first heart attack. Things were pretty much going to hell in a handbasket. Maybe I could have figured something out if the situation had been different.”

“I’m starting to realize how rough life was for you back then, Cole,” she said. “Teenagers can be so selfish and oblivious to the rest of the world. I had no idea at the time.”

He shrugged. “I’m through it now.”

“You did a good job with your brothers. I’ve never seen anyone more fiercely protective.”

“I was the oldest,” he said simply.

He was the oldest, so he assumed responsibility and looked out for them. She was an old friend of his, so he took care of her, too. Did he feel the need to care for everyone he knew? “Have you made a habit of that?”

“Of what?”

“Of taking responsibility for other people’s problems?”

“God, I hope not.” He started searching the water for a jet, and by the time he found one, he’d moved a little closer. For a moment Jaclyn thought he might slip his arm around her, but he didn’t.

“What was your dad like?” she asked.

“My dad didn’t say much. He was a quiet man who worked too hard.”

“Has he passed away, then?”

“Yeah. Had a second heart attack a couple of years after my mother died. What about your parents? They still around?”

His arm brushed hers, leaving Jaclyn’s skin tingling. His close proximity and the warmth of the rising steam—or was the heat Jaclyn was feeling coming from an internal source?—made her want to melt into him, to let his body support hers.

“They moved to Los Angeles right after I married Terry,” she said, scooping up some water and dribbling it on her thighs, just below the hem of her shorts. “They
wanted to be near my aunt, who was getting old, so they could take care of her. They were planning to move back once she died, but they never did. They were killed in a car crash three years later.”

“I’m sorry,” he said.

She missed her parents, especially while she was going through the divorce, but after six years, she’d grown somewhat accustomed to being without them. Still, she smiled because she appreciated Cole’s sympathy—and liked the way their shoulders were touching.

“What did you think of Burt?” Jaclyn asked. She braved a glance at his face, now just a few inches from her own, and thought she could drown in his eyes. Thick lashes framed chocolate-brown eyes that were looking at her mouth. She let her own gaze drop to his lips and felt her stomach flutter. The only man she’d ever kissed was Terry, and she couldn’t help but wonder what it would feel like to have Cole’s lips pressed to hers.

“I think he hasn’t improved with time,” he said.

“No kidding.” She forced herself to look away. “Try living with him.”

“I can see why you couldn’t.”

“Burt wasn’t the reason I left. Terry was.”

His face glistened with moisture from the heat of the water as he gazed down at her. His eyes were heavy-lidded, and seemed even more preoccupied with her mouth.

“Are you ready to tell me why?”

“I told you tonight after dinner that he wouldn’t stand up to his father and get us out—”

“But that wasn’t all of it, was it.”

“No.”

“What’s the rest?”

Jaclyn hesitated. She felt a wonderful sense of security sitting here with Cole, the bubbles from the jets perking around their knees, the steam blocking out everything more than a few feet away. But Terry’s infidelity was something
she didn’t particularly want to discuss with her boss. She thought he might try to justify Terry’s actions, tell her the affairs meant nothing. And she had another reason for keeping it a secret. Something she’d never admitted to anyone.

“It’s okay if you’d rather not tell me,” he said, returning his attention to the water.

She thought she was going to nod and take the out he’d given her, but instead, tears filled her eyes, and she could only blink helplessly. Maybe she
did
want to say what was really bothering her, what had bothered her all along. Maybe she had to get it off her chest.

“What is it, Jackie?” he murmured.

“He was unfaithful,” she said, one tear slipping down her cheek. “But jealousy wasn’t the worst of it. The worst of it was knowing I wasn’t woman enough to keep him from straying.”
There. She’d said it.