Weekends Required (22 page)

 “Honey I hate to but I have to go into the office for awhile this morning. I’m going to call a car to pick me up so that you may use mine today. Do you think you know the way to the hospital from here?”

“I… I’m not sure; can you leave me some directions?”

“Of course, I’ll write them down and leave them in the kitchen. Make yourself at home; anything I have is yours as well. I’ll come to the hospital when I can get free, but if you need me at all just call, okay?”

After another kiss, he quickly showered and dressed. As soon as he was gone, Claire called the hospital and was told that her mother’s doctor would be making his rounds at nine. She quickly dressed and found the directions in the kitchen along with a beautiful flower that Claire suspected Jason had pulled from the front flowerbed. Claire put it to her nose to inhale the sweet fragrance and then grabbed her purse along with the directions that Jason had left. She locked the door behind her and settled into Jason’s Mercedes.

The difference between his car and her poor Toyota was like night and day. Even though Daisy was dependable, she’d lost her beauty long ago and luxury was never part of the package. The seats in Jason’s car were buttery soft, and all the gadgets made her wish she had time to explore each of them. She easily followed his directions, and the hospital was indeed not far from his home at all. Claire hoped and prayed that the doctor would have encouraging news for her today.

 Chapter Twenty Three

When Claire entered the ICU wing of the hospital, she spotted her mother’s nurse Glenda at the nurse’s station. Glenda looked up as she approached and gave her a warm smile. “Good morning Ms. Walters, how are you today?”

“Good morning Glenda, I’m good. How are you?”

“I’m busy, busy as usual, but I wouldn’t have it any other way. Your mother had a good, restful night last night and is awake this morning. She’s confused as to what’s happened to her and where she is, which is normal. I think she’ll be relieved to see a familiar face.” Glenda came around the corner of the nurse’s station and pulled her to the side. “Dr. Mauldin will be around soon and will discuss the specifics of your mother’s case with you. I want to prepare you for what I’ve noticed this morning when checking on her. Your mother has obvious speech difficulty; there’s some drooping evident on her face and also some problems gripping with her left hand. Now this isn’t unusual with a stroke, and I’m not trying to scare you, I just wanted you to be prepared so that you don’t panic in front of your mother."

Claire swallowed hard and drew a deep breath. “Thank you Glenda, I really appreciate you letting me know.” With a motherly pat on the shoulder, Glenda went back to the nurse’s station, and Claire put on a brave face and entered her mother’s room.

Her eyes were closed, and she appeared to be resting. Claire studied her intently, looking for signs of what Glenda had indicated. Her mother appeared perfectly normal in sleep, so peaceful that it was hard to believe she’d had a recent stroke. Claire pulled a chair up to the side of the bed and gently reached over to take her hand. Had she ever really noticed how beautiful her mother was?

With so many years spent with an overbearing husband who literally dominated a room, her mother had seemed to fade into the background. Claire now realized that this was her way of coping and also of protecting herself from his wrath. When she thought back through the years, Claire found it hard to remember one instance where she knew what her mother was wearing or how she looked.

All those years living with him had literally made her into a ghost who barely existed against the backdrop of his constant anger and ridicule. She had so little time to recover after he had died before she was stricken with Alzheimer’s. In the end, Claire felt that not only had he broken her spirit long ago; he had also broken her mind. Really seeing her today for the first time, Claire wept inside for the beautiful person both inside and out who had never been strong enough to make the break that she needed to survive.

Maybe part of her should feel anger towards her mother for not leaving her father and taking her and Chrissie away from the abuse they’d all endured for so long. She simply was not strong enough to survive the fallout this would have caused. Thoughts of Jason surfaced as she thought of the liberties he had taken in her life without consulting her. Did her father start out that way, taking over areas of her mother’s life until he controlled every aspect of it? A sick feeling settled in the pit of her stomach. Would looking at her mother soon be like looking in a mirror?

A knock sounded at the door and a handsome older man in blue scrubs and a white lab coat walked into the room. With a hand extended towards her he said, “I’m Dr. Mauldin, and I’ll be handling your mother’s care while she’s here.” Claire shook his hand and introduced herself. He walked to the bedside and studied the chart he had brought in with him.

“I understand your mother rested well last night but appears to be showing some stroke-related symptoms. There are times when the stroke is mild and very minor, temporary symptoms are detected. Other times when the stroke is more severe, symptoms are greater and long-term or permanent. Where your mother will end up in this scenario only time will tell. Even though it’s still early in this process, I would put your mother closer to the moderate to severe category."

"Does that mean she won’t improve? Of course not, what it does mean is that the road will be longer and the need for rehabilitation much greater. It’s possible the damage could be less severe than I predict but based on her symptoms thus far, you need to be prepared for what lies ahead.”

Claire felt what hope she had slowly begin to die. The look on Dr. Mauldin’s face clearly showed the gravity of the situation. At that moment, Claire felt her mother’s hand move in her own as her eyes opened, and she slowly looked around the room. Claire forced a smile on her face as her mother focused on her. “Ch…Ch…Ris…” Claire’s heart fell. It wasn’t unusual for her mother to mistake her for her dead sister; it was the apparent struggle of her trying to form the word that was the most heart breaking. The terror and frustration were evident in her eyes as she looked at Claire.

Dr. Mauldin stepped forward and took her mother’s arm. “Mrs. Walters, I’m Dr. Mauldin, and you’re in the hospital. You had a stroke yesterday and were brought here. I know you’re confused right now and probably a little scared. We’re going to take care of you. Just take your time when trying to speak or move for a bit. A stroke can make things more difficult for awhile and what’s normally so easy may be harder." He continued on in a patient, soothing voice, “we’re going to run some tests on you in the next few days. You will get so sick of seeing me that you will be trying to lock me out, but we’re going to be a great team, you and I. I’m stopping all previous medications except for the insulin, and we will slowly see what needs to be added back or changed. You will tell me what you’re feeling and what you need, and I’ll do my best to make it happen. I work right here in this hospital so if you need me anytime you have one of the nurses give me a call. I take care of my own, and you’re one of them now, okay?”

Claire was moved at the obvious sincerity in Dr. Mauldin’s voice. She could tell that her mother was also soothed by his promises, and some of the panic eased out of her eyes. “Now I’m going to go set up some tests for later this morning and let you and your daughter have a chance to visit. If it's ok, I’ll call you Evelyn from this point; we’re going to be good friends before this is over.” Her mother nodded her head in agreement, and Dr. Mauldin left them alone.

Claire looked down at her mother and said, “Mom, you’re going to be okay; I know you’re scared but please believe we will get you the help you need.”

Tears started to flow from her mother’s eyes as she said, “Cl…Ai..Re.” Somehow just hearing her mother managing to say her name after several attempts was one of the sweetest and saddest moments of her life.

 “Mom, please just try to rest now and build your strength back up. You heard Dr. Mauldin say they’re doing tests today so they’ll know how best to help you.”

“Soo..rr..y.....N..ot…G…ood…M.o….m.”

 It took her a few seconds to figure out what her mother was trying to say to her. “Mom! Why would you say that? This isn’t your fault and it sure doesn’t make you a bad mother. I love you very much, and you being sick will never change that.” As her own tears began to flow despite her best efforts to hold them back, Claire reached down to brush the tears away from her mother’s cheeks.

“Di..d..no..t…s..av.e….my….baa..bie..s.” In that moment Claire knew exactly what she was referring to. Even after he was gone, the presence of her father lingered heavily in the room alive in both her mother’s and Claire's memory.

The abuse she received at the hands of her father would never leave her, but she’d managed to make a life for herself. Her mother, however, had never really had that reprieve. She moved from the prison of living with an abusive husband to the prison of Alzheimer’s and now those walls were once again closing in around her. Regret and something close to shame were clearly reflected in the depths of her eyes.

“Mom, the past is over. Daddy made you a prisoner, but now you’re free and you deserve to be happy and enjoy your life. I realize that you spent most of your life trying to deflect his anger onto you and away from us." Claire leaned down and put her arms around her mother as best she could, and they stayed like that until the door opened.

“Can anyone join in this hug?”

Claire saw Louise smiling in the doorway and held out a hand to her. “Group hug then.” Claire insisted that Louise take the one chair in the room, and she stood near the window. “How did you get here this morning? I was going to call and see if you wanted me to pick you up.”

“My sister dropped me on her way to play bingo,” laughed Louise. “You know nothing can keep her from getting in there and hoping for the big payoff.”

Claire noticed her mother looked much better since Louise arrived. She’d been part of their lives for so long that she was like a sister and maybe a bit of a mother to them both. Claire could tell that Louise brought the same calming influence to her mother that she always did. Soon, she was trying to smile along with them as they joked and tried to lighten the mood.

~~~

Glenda arrived around eleven and wheeled her mother off for her first round of tests. Louise said she was going to the restroom and to stretch her legs for a bit. Claire decided to go to the waiting room and find some magazines to pass the time. As she neared the nurse’s station she was surprised to see Jason deep in conversation with Dr. Mauldin.

Jason spotted her and walked over to give her a hug. “Hi there, how is your mom doing today?”

“Umm, pretty good. When did you get here?”

“A few moments ago,” said Jason. “I met Tom on my way in, and we were catching up. We both serve on some of the same charities and have known each other for years. Your mother couldn’t be in better hands. I told Tom that your mother was to have whatever she needs so don’t worry about anything.”

Claire felt her spine stiffen. She gave Dr. Mauldin a tight smile and turned to Jason. “May I talk to you privately for a moment please?”

Obviously puzzled by her behavior, Jason replied, “Sure. Tom it was great to see you again. I’m sure we will talk soon.”

Jason steered her down the hall and stepped out a side door into a small courtyard. When he attempted to put his arms around her, she stiffened and pushed away. “Jason, why were you discussing my mother’s medical care with her doctor?”

Still looking confused, he said, “As I mentioned, Tom and I are friends, and I wanted him to know that your mother could afford to have any care that she might need. Doctors have their hands tied these days getting insurance companies to approve adequate care for their patients, and I don’t want this to be the case with your mother; I know how important she is to you.”

“Jason, I appreciate the fact that you’d care, but I need to make these decisions. I realize that you’re somewhat in the know about my mother’s financial situation; however, I must be completely informed so that I can make the necessary judgments concerning her care. I can’t promise the hospital or the doctor that I can give them a blank check for whatever they deem necessary; we’re not rich. I can, however, start making arrangements as soon as the doctor discusses options with ME.”

“Honey, you don’t have to worry about looking at options. I’m perfectly happy to pay for whatever your mother might need. You don’t need the additional stress of thinking about money while you’re worrying about your mother. Claire I’ve the money, and I would like nothing better than to help you. I’m not trying to take over here, but I do want your mother to have every opportunity to recover,” assured Jason.

“I know that you feel like you’re helping, and I do appreciate it, but she’s my mother Jason, and I need to make the decisions. Please let me handle this, and I would appreciate it if you’d not discuss my mother’s case with her doctor without my knowledge.”

Jason was temporarily at a loss for words. “Claire, I’ve obviously upset you, which was not my intention. Tom asked me who I was seeing at the hospital which brought up the conversation of your mother. As I said, I know how important she is to you, and I wanted to make sure you didn’t have to worry about her getting the help that she needs. I’m sorry if I’ve upset you, and I’ll of course respect your wishes in this.” Claire stared into his eyes and saw nothing but sincerity.

Was she overreacting? Was her past relationship with her father coloring everything she did? Still feeling uneasy despite his assurances, Claire knew that the hospital was probably not the best place for a heart to heart talk with him and decided to let the matter drop for now. Soon though, they had to discuss his habit of trying to run her life. He had to understand that she was capable of making her own decisions. Maybe her mother and father started out this way in the beginning; then he had he started taking over small areas of her life until he finally consumed her?