Wheels of Steel, Book 2 (33 page)

Amberly was already shaking her head. “I’m going to be working the computer for the light show, and I need Belinda.”

Robin shrugged. “I can do it, I guess. I don’t mind.”

Jason looked at her. “Robin, are you sure? Because if you’re selling music you aren’t going to be able to enjoy the party.”

“My boyfriend and friends are all doing something. I want something to do, too.”

He smiled. “Alright babe. But we’re paying you for-”

“No, just let me do this for you. I’m going to feel pretty stupid dressed like the Queen of Hearts with no Mad Hatter next to me and just standing there looking crazy.” Jason gave her a quick hug. They continued talking about the logistics of getting everything set up and if they didn’t get started tonight then it wouldn’t get done. Friday they would only have time enough to put together the equipment after getting dressed. Tomorrow would be chaos.

Robin both dreaded and looked forward to the end of classes. They drove to the hospital mostly in silence. She knew that her anxiety had begun to rub off on Jason. His face was pale beneath his numerous freckles and his muscles were jerkier than normal. She knew that he would be due for another seizure soon and hoped that it wouldn’t be bad because of their mutual anxiety.

Mama was already waiting for her in the small waiting area. Robin could tell that she was having a bad day as well. Her normally youthful face was lined, shadows stood out beneath her eyes. When she saw Robin she immediately stood and hugged her in greeting. She looked at Jason, greeting him as well, but Robin didn’t know if Mama had even seen him. She let the receptionist know that she had arrived and then she sat down with Mama on one side of her and Jason on the other side of her.

Betty knew that this was a sign. Today was the anniversary of her husband’s death and she had to sit in a waiting room of a hospital, waiting for results of her only child’s cancer test. On this day of all days; which is the reason that she knew the tests would come back positive. Because this would be her punishment for all of the wrong that she had done.

Her eyes moved to the boy that was nervously holding her daughter’s hand. His head turned this way and that and his arms and hands kept moving even when she could clearly see that he was trying to sit still.

Betty could read a message in his movements and they said that he was afraid, he was afraid for her daughter just in the same way that she was afraid. Betty closed her eyes and prayed that she would have more time with her daughter, she prayed that she would have more time to prove that college and the boy you dated was of little consequence in the great scheme of things. There should be dinners, and phone calls, and trips to the Bahamas, and Florida, and maybe even one day Grand babies…and there should be no dark cloud of residual anger hanging over their heads.

Betty Mathena prayed that god would give her more time with her child.

The receptionist finally called Robin’s name and she marched into the room, the others falling behind her as she uncharacteristically took the lead. Robin felt her stomach twisting and knotting and wished that she had gone to the restroom one last time before sitting down in one of the small plastic chairs. She knew that her face was shiny with sweat, her heart was already slamming in her chest.

Dr. Sarma’s expression did not seem like he would be the bearer off good news. Robin watched his mouth move, concentrating on the words but all she could hear was ‘blah blah blah abnormal cells. Blah blah cancerous…blah blah removed.’ And then Momma was squeezing one hand and Jason was squeezing the other. Sweat was rolling down her body.

“Robin?” Jason was leaning forward and Robin dragged her eyes to his green ones. “Did you hear what the doctor said? They are benign, not malignant. They are just going to remove them.” Robin blinked.

Dr. Sarma was suddenly shining a light into her eyes. “Robin?”

She nodded her head quickly. “I’m okay.”

“Robin.” He said slowly. “I’m going to write you an anti-anxiety medicine. I think that will help you, okay?”

Jason suddenly pulled Robin into his arms and hugged her. “I was scared.” He said into her neck. “I was so scared, Robin.”

“I know. It’s okay.” Betty just stroked her daughter’s hair as she watched them. He cared for her daughter, that was plain to see. He did really care.

Dr. Sarma was typing into a computer. “Robin the abnormal cells are not malignant today.” He then turned to her solemnly. “But it could develop into that. You have inflammatory bowel disease, that’s pretty obvious. Do you know what Crohns disease is?”

Robin shook her head very quickly, fear like little pinpricks moved along her nerve endings.

“Well, we believe it’s an auto-immune disorder. That means that your own immune system attacks your intestines; hence your irritable bowel.” He explained that Crohns disease is the thickening of the intestines which causes severe pain and can be the cause of her ulcers and obviously the irritable bowel. Because of the nature of the disease, it could also lead to cancerous cell growth.

“What concerns me is that you described your pain level from a threshold of one to ten at just a five, maybe six. People with Crohns generally will describe it at ten or above.”

Robin looked at her mother quickly. “Mom, remember that time we went to-”

“Yes! That Chinese restaurant and you got sick!”

Robin turned back to the doctor. “About a year ago, my mom and I went to a restaurant and I got suddenly sick while I was still in the middle of my meal.” Though she didn’t admit it to her mother, it felt as if she was trying to digest broken glass. Each time she went to the restroom, even just to pee, the pain was excruciating. “I made it home but I literally had to stay in bed for the rest of the day.” She had literally forced herself to go to work the next day, but had been in so much pain that she’d had to limp around partially stooped over. “I didn’t feel myself for about a week.”

“Is that the first time you had ever experienced pain like that?” Dr. Sarma asked while taking notes.

“Well…once before.” After her father died. She had attributed it to grief. “But not that bad and it went away after a few hours.”

“It could very well be Crohn’s.”

“How do you get rid of it?” Jason interjected. The doctor met his eyes.

“You don’t. There is no cure for Crohn’s. If Robin has it, then she is in remission. Remission can last for years, or for just a very short period of time.”

“She’ll be alright, won’t she?” Betty asked.

“Yes. But we need to do another endoscopy to remove the bad cells and complete some tests to try to determine if we are on the right track.”

The Doctor gave her a prescription for valium and instructed her on what to do should the intestinal pain return. Betty Mathena sniffed and stared at the ceiling. Thank you god, she prayed. I will do better. I swear to you that I will do better.

They had gone through an emotional rollercoaster and were quiet as they left the hospital that evening. Betty was holding her daughter’s hand as they walked leisurely. She turned to Robin as they stepped off the elevators to the garage.

“I think I will go visit your Daddy’s grave today.”

That surprised Robin. She never wanted to think about Daddy’s dying. In the past when Robin tried to call her to see if she was okay, on the anniversary of his death, Mama would just brush her off. She had explained in sharp words that all she wanted to do was get past this day with her sanity intact and Robin had understood that perfectly. On this day, they didn’t talk about Daddy.

“Do you want me to go with you?”

“No.” Betty smiled softly. “I want to do it alone.”

Robin hugged her mother quickly. “Thanks for being here Mama.” She whispered. Betty pulled back and stroked Robin’s short hair.

“This hairstyle really suits you.” She watched her lovingly and then looked at Jason.

“Jason, I’ll see you Sunday then.”

Jason’s brow smoothed and he took a deep breath. “Yes, ma’ame. I’ll see you Sunday.”

“Robin and I usually got out to lunch after church. But if it’s okay with you two, I’d like to make us dinner. How does meatloaf and sautéed cabbage sound?”

Momma hadn’t cooked a Sunday dinner in ages. She looked at Jason. “My mother makes the best sautéed cabbage in the world.”

“I never had sautéed cabbage.” He said. “Sounds good. Dinner would be great Mrs. Mathena.” Betty could see that his muscles weren’t moving so badly now. She decided that she would pull up some information on Cerebral Palsy on the computer when she returned home.

Once they were loaded up in her car Jason turned to her. “Do you want to go visit your father’s grave, Robin?”

She nodded silently too afraid to talk because then she might start crying. He took her hand.

“It’s okay if you want to cry. You have every right, you’ve been so strong today.” She gave him a brave smile.

“I think I’m okay.”

Robin drove to Spring Grove Cemetery. It was big, hard to navigate through, but she had the route embedded in her memories even though she had only come here twice before. She wondered if she would see her Mom there, but didn’t. Jason stayed in the car while she made her way to Daddy’s grave stone.

She sat down. “Hi Daddy. I know I don’t have to come here to talk to you, but I couldn’t seem to do this anywhere else but here. I’m sorry that I haven’t been talking to you as much.” And then Robin explained about all of the things that had been happening to her. She talked about Miss Lucille and about actually being in college—if only to help someone else out. “Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad, Daddy. Maybe I can do it. I mean, I know I can do it, but maybe I WANT to do it now.” She talked about Jason and about how strong he was and how much she cared for him. And then she talked about her and Mama’s vacation. “At first, I wasn’t looking forward to it. But now…I just want some time with just us, time to make things right again.”

When Robin finally stopped talking over half an hour had passed. She turned back to her car where she had left Jason and saw that her mother’s car had pulled up right behind hers and Mama was sitting there silently, giving her an opportunity to speak to her father privately. She stood up quickly.

“Why didn’t you come up?” She asked.

Her mother smiled. “I didn’t need to.” She waved and drove away.

Robin climbed into the car. “Jason, I’m so sorry. I had no idea that I’d be that long.” He just smiled at her. His muscles were lucid his smile straight; and killer, as always.

“You had a seizure?” She asked.

“Yeah, I was strapped in. I’m okay.”

She reached over and kissed him, holding him there against her for a moment. “Thank you for suggesting that. I really needed it.”

“I know.”

They had dinner at Johnny Rockets, sitting and talking long after their meal was finished. Jason’s hand finally moved along her knuckles and he met her eyes silently. Robin’s body shivered. They paid their check and went back to the apartment. Robin wanted a shower, she felt icky from the day’s events. She heard the shower curtain open and turned to see Jason standing there nude, braces on his knees.

“Jason! You’re not supposed to be standing…”

He reached for her hand which she took, and then he stepped into the shower very carefully. “I want to take a shower with you.” Robin wiped the streaming water from her eyes as he positioned himself against the wall.

“I want to wash you.” He took the wash cloth from her hands and quickly lathered soap onto it. She moved forward and closed her eyes as he began to gently wash her neck, her arms, and then her torso. He had her turn and he washed her back and then she felt the wash cloth between her thighs as he gently washed her there. She felt soft kisses on her back and her heart began to beat rapidly.

Jason’s soapy fingers slipped past the wash cloth and he gently stroked her pussy. Robin shuddered and placed her hand on the wall to keep herself from falling. She grabbed the soap and created a lather in her hands and then she reached behind her, locating Jason’s very hard cock.

She washed him, her hands searching out his tight stomach, feeling the muscles there tremble at her touch and hearing his sharp gulp of air as the pleasure in him mounted. Robin turned and placed one leg onto the tub’s edge and then she pressed her body against his, her hands moving easily up his chest, their mouths finding each other. His hands pulled her bodily against him where he leaned against the wall. Jason’s hand clutched her full ass and he rolled his hips against her wet pelvis, his cock between them, rubbing into her belly.