When A Thug Loves A Woman (12 page)

“Little nigga sleeping like a king,” I chuckled as I backed out and closed his door.

Then I looked to the next bedroom across the hall from his, which was a nursery that was decorated in pink and white.
She having a girl
, I thought as I walked in to see all the stuff she had so far. I didn’t know how to feel about this shit. I knew that there was a possibility that the baby could be mine, yet I still had my doubts. The more I thought about it, the more confused and conflicted I became so I immediately left the room to go talk to Adore.

I went downstairs to find her sitting on the couch watching TV. I plopped down on the couch next to her.

“So, you having a girl?”

Just like I thought she would, she ignored me. She didn’t even bat an eye at my ass. I snatched the remote from her ass and turned the TV off.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” I asked her.

“What difference would it have made, Canaan? You seen what you saw, formulated your own story in your mind, and ran with it. When you get like that, there’s no getting through to you so I said to hell with it,” she said.

“How long that nigga been fucking with you?” I asked.

“Since he moved down there really but it’s really been bad for the past five years. If I didn’t pay him, he would send his goons to my job to use scare tactics to scare me into doing what he wants or send them to sit outside Caner’s school,” she explained.

A nigga finally got to the bottom of this bullshit with Adore and Jeremy. She waited until I was down and out to fess up the truth about what their involvement was. When I tell you I felt stupid for thinking they were fucking, I only felt that way slightly. See, I only acted that way because I knew for years that he wanted her. so technically, in my eyes, I really didn’t beat his ass for nothing. Especially after what I found out.

Apparently, this nigga Jeremy really was the reason my ass was behind bars because he was working for the police the whole time. He planted the drugs in the car that day and made a deal with them so he wouldn’t have to do any time. The whole time I thought I was saving Casino by saying the drugs were mine when they had plans to take me down anyways. Not long after I was shipped off, he started his come up and found him a connect and out of all the places in the world for him to move to, he chose Miami, chasing after Adore.

He made a name for himself there and from what I was told, he was doing big things. He tried to pursue Adore but she wasn’t having that. She was never one to homey hop, no matter if I was going to be gone for a while or not and I can respect that about her. So since she didn’t want him, he started terrorizing her and basically forcing her to pay him for her protection.

He started off with setting her car on fire, then when that didn’t work, he sent somebody to shoot up her house, then he went as far as to burn it down. She couldn’t go to the police because he had them right in his pocket and they wouldn’t do shit but throw the police reports in the garbage. The only thing she could do was either pay up or be with him and she definitely didn’t want to do the later because her fear of me was greater than her fear of him.

“Adore,” I sighed as I pinched the bridge of my nose. “Why didn’t you just come home where you were safe? Do you really think Casino would let anything happen to you or Caner?” I asked her.

“If he can come up here and touch you for simply beating his ass, what makes you think he wouldn’t touch me?” she asked me.

“How do you know he’s the one who shot me?” I questioned.

“How do you know he’s
not
the one who shot you?” she threw back at me.

“Don’t trip, Imma handle him. I—”

“No, Canaan!” she cut me off. “I understand that you have to get your payback or whatever because of what he did to you but just let it rock for right now. You’re always too eager to do something and you act off of pure emotions and that’s how you always end up in fucked up situations. Learn to use the element of surprise sometimes. Hit him when he’ll least expect it. Let the tension die down and let him think you’ve forgotten and then you get him. You just got out of the hospital so your main focus and concern should be spending time with your son because tomorrow isn’t promised. Fuck Jeremy,” Adore said.

Well, excuse the hell out of me
, I thought as I looked at her in shock. Adore just sat here and really read my ass and I couldn’t say shit because she was right.

“You’re right, Adore, but look I want to apologize. I shouldn’t have…” my voice trailed off when she held her hand up for me to stop. “Damn, are you gonna let me say shit?” I huffed.

“No because it’s always the same shit with you, Canaan. You fuck up, you do something to hurt me, you realize you fucked up, and then you want to come back and apologize. Ain’t shit changed with you and probably never will so save your breath. Get ready to go get your son off the bus, I’m going to take a nap,” she said as she got off the couch.

I can’t stand her ass
, I thought before kicking my feet up and turning the TV on.

“And get your feet off my table!” she yelled.

“Shut yo ass up!” I yelled back at her as I put my feet down while chuckling.

“Come on, Casino. I can’t,” Choc whined.

“I don’t want to hear that shit, give me one more,” I told her as I slapped her round, chocolate ass.

We had literally been fucking all morning. She thought she was just going to roll over and jump out of bed but I had something for her ass. She went to sleep on me last night without giving me some pussy so these were her repercussions. She knew damn well I didn’t play that shit.

“Ow, stop before Majesty hears us,” she moaned out.

“Majesty is into her cartoons. The only thing you need to be worried about is busting this last nut,” I told her as I grabbed a handful of her hair.

“I…I can’t, baby. Please just cum! Why are you doing this to me?!” she cried.

“If you can’t cum then I can’t either,” I told her.

Choc had already cum three times but I hadn’t bust one nut yet. I was holding out on her on purpose. All I needed her to do was cum one more time for me and I would be satisfied but until she did so, I wouldn’t budge. I could go all day if that’s the route she wanted to take.

“Come on, Choc, cum for Daddy!”

I didn’t even have time to catch the words before they left my mouth. I knew because of her experience with her being raped by her father, she didn’t like for me to use that word while we were fucking but I was so used to it that it was hard for me to catch myself sometimes.

“Uhhh, shiiiit!” she yelled as her body jerked.

“That’s my girl,” I said as I came right behind her.

I wasn’t going to tell her that the condom broke because she would have went off on my ass so I just eased out of her and went straight to the bathroom and acted as if I was flushing it. When I came back to the room, she was sprawled out on the bed looking like she was drained. She couldn’t even keep her eyes open.

“I’m sorry, baby, I didn’t mean to—”

“It’s cool,” she cut me off, sounding groggy.

I climbed in the bed and hovered over her. “Give me a kiss so I’ll know you don’t feel some type of way.”

Choc rolled her eyes in the back of her head before puckering up her lips for me to kiss. I smiled before pecking her lips.

“I love you, Choc,” I said as I smacked her bare ass.

“Yea, sure tell me anything.” She waved me off. “You don’t have to say it just because you feel bad. It’s fine, I—”

“I love you, Bambi, like, on some real shit.”

Instantly, her head shot up and she looked at me with wide, confused eyes. I had told Choc I loved her before in a playful manner plenty of times but now wasn’t one of those times and I wanted her to know that, so I called her Bambi instead of Choc so she would know how serious I was.

“I…I love you, too, Casimir!” she said as she jumped up and kissed me.

“Girl, you better stop before you get something else started. You know I just had your ass crying like a baby,” I told her.

“Whatever, boy,” she laughed. “Don’t you have to go pick up Ca’Mir?” she asked as she laid back down.

“Yea, I’m about to go get him right now,” I told her as I got up.

“Ooh, I can’t wait to see him. I just want to kiss on his little fat cheeks. I miss him so much,” she whined.

“Don’t start that shit. Whenever he’s around, you act like I don’t even exist,” I said, cutting my eyes at her.

“What, you jealous?”

“Fuck yea, I am!”

“Aw bae, don’t be like that. You know you’re my big baby but Mir is my little baby,” she laughed.

That was another thing I loved about Choc, she had no problem with accepting and loving my kids like they were hers. If it weren’t for her, we still wouldn’t know to this day if Ca’Mir was mine or not because I was adamant about not getting that damn DNA test done. Choc pushed me to find out for sure so I went ahead and did it. I fucking cried when the results came back that I was 99.99% the father of his little ass. I thought Choc was going to run for the hills when she found out but instead, she stuck it out with my ass and been helping me and Aamil with him.

Unlike China, her and Aamil actually get along. They call each other, set up times for Choc to go and pick up Ca’Mir and drop him off and all that shit. I wouldn’t say that they were the best of friends but they have a mutual respect for each other and know each other’s roles in my life. Aamil knows that she’s just my son’s mother and never crosses that line or tries to disrespect me or Choc and Choc knows that she never has to worry about me crossing that line with Aamil. Everything was peaceful on that end concerning them two.

China, on the other hand, if I ever crossed paths with that bitch again, I promise I’m putting her right on her ass for the shit she did. I hadn’t seen my daughter in months and the shit was killing me. I had never gone this long without seeing Casiyah and I knew my baby missed me just as much as I missed her. I swear imma kill her dog ass mama.

“Aye, since you love kids so much, how about you give me one?” I told Choc.

“Oh no, nigga please. Don’t you think you have enough? You have one of each and before you say anything, don’t trip. Siyah will be home where she belongs before you even know it. I have faith in that. Besides, we have Majesty running around here and don’t think I didn’t hear her call you daddy the other day and you didn’t even bother to correct her. I didn’t check you or her on it because I was in a good mood,” Choc told me with a side eye.

“Wait, hold up. What’s wrong with Majesty calling me daddy?” I asked her.

“You know what’s wrong with it, Casino. Dutchess is out of rehab so we don’t know if she’s going to want her back or not once she’s done getting her life together. I don’t want Majesty getting her heart broken when she doesn’t understand why she can’t see her daddy anymore,” she explained.

“You’re going to really let her go back with her?”

“She’s not my daughter and I don’t have any rights to her. As long as Dutchess does right by her and stays clean, I really don’t see the problem.” She shrugged.

I just got up and went to the bathroom to take a shower on that note. I didn’t know how to feel about that one right there. Just as Choc had learned to love my kids as if they were her own, I had done the same with Majesty. That little girl was such a joy to be around and I looked forward to coming home to her hugs and kisses every day.

I’d already had my daughter snatched away from me for no reason and now here Choc was talking about Majesty could be leaving us. That shit just didn’t sit right with me. When I put Dutchess in rehab, it was initially for her and Majesty because I knew no little girl wants to see her mother like that but I never thought she would just come back for her like that. I know I may sound selfish and didn’t really have a say so because she was not my niece but I did really feel some type of way about the situation.

I smiled at Dutchess as she walked towards my car to get in. I was so proud of my sister, she looked so good and healthy. She had completed sixty days at a rehab that Casino put her in after our big fight and it had been two months since she walked out of those doors and she’d been clean ever since.

“Hey, Bam,” she greeted me since she got in.

“Hey, Dutch, you looking good, girl. I see you gaining that weight back.”

“I know, I need to slow down on the eating,” she said.

“Girl, boo, it’s in all the right places.” I waved her off.

“For real though, Bam. You really don’t have to do this with me if you’re not ready. I’m doing this for me because I feel like this is something that I have to do. I don’t want to force you to do it if you’re not ready or drag you into it,” she told me.

Yesterday, Dutchess called me talking about she was going to confront our parents about what happened to us when we were younger. She said she understood that this was going to be like picking at an old scab but she felt like this was crucial for her healing process. I told her that I was down because I refused to throw her to the wolves by herself. I had a few questions of my own, mainly for my mom.

“Dutchess, I told you yesterday that we were in this together. We went through it together so why not confront it together so we can heal it together?” I asked.

“Okay, I just wanted to make sure,” she said.

I reached in my purse and pulled out my phone so I could go to my pictures. I went straight to the picture I took of Majesty before I left the house today.

“Girl, look at your baby,” I said as I handed her the phone.

Dutchess immediately burst into laughter at the duck lips and the fact that Majesty had her hands on her hips in the picture. At just three years old, she was definitely a character.

“She is something else,” Dutchess smiled.

“Yes she is. I wonder where she gets it from,” I said sarcastically.

“Thank you, Bam. I mean, I really thank and appreciate you. If it weren’t for you, I don’t know where my baby would be,” Dutchess said.

“Dutch, you really don’t have to thank me. I was just doing my job as an auntie. I want to thank you for dropping her off to me when you knew you couldn’t do it anymore instead of just giving her to anybody or leaving her wherever and never looking back,” I told her.

“I’ve been thinking about signing over my rights,” Dutchess whispered.

“What?” I yelled as I snapped my head in her direction when I came to a red light. “Dutchess, what are you talking about?”

“Bambi, what could I possibly teach Majesty? How to do drugs and be strung out? I can’t teach her a damn thing! She’s received more love from you in the months since she been with you than the years that I had her. Majesty doesn’t even know me and I can guarantee you she shouldn’t want to. I’m a fucking disgrace. What do I look like taking her out of her comfort zone and from you where she’s progressed so much back to me? Nah sis, that would be so wrong of me,” Dutchess said.

I didn’t even know what to say because I was at a loss for words. I never knew that my sister felt like this. I was sure that as soon as she got her life together, she was going to come back for her daughter and they were going to live a normal life and try to rebuild the relationship that had been damaged. I was pretty sure it could happen because Majesty was still young as hell. I was sure she wouldn’t really understand anyways.

“Dutchess, look, I was never trying to replace you in Majesty’s life. I was just trying to step in until you came back to get her. You signing over your rights is a very big step and something that you can’t undo,” I told her.

“I know and I put a lot of thought into it, so—”

“Nah, Dutch, just think on it a little more for me, please?” I begged.

She sighed and nodded her head. “Alright, alright.”

“Okay,” I mumbled as I pulled up to the house we grew up in as little girls.

We just sat there in front of the house and stared up at it, neither one of us having the courage to make the first move to get out of the car.
The house of terror
, I thought as I continued to stare at it.

“You ready?” Dutchess asked just above a whisper.

“Mhm, let’s do this,” I said as I turned the car off and we got out.

I grabbed Dutchess’ hand to give it a gentle squeeze to let her know that we could do this as we walked hand in hand up to the front door. She rang the doorbell and I let out a sigh as we waited for an answer. I let go of the breath I didn’t even realize I was holding when the door opened.

“Wow,” our mother said as she stood there staring at us. “Wow,” she said again, like she couldn’t believe it was us.

“Are you going to let us in or…” I said.

“Oh, sure. Come in,” she said as she stepped to the side.

Dutchess took the lead and I followed right behind her. I found it kind of eerie how after all these years, nothing in the house was changed. I mean completely nothing was changed. There were still pictures up of us throughout our school years, cheerleading trophies, basketball trophies, volleyball trophies, all of that was still hanging up.

“What brings you two by? I know you couldn’t have been possibly just been in the neighborhood,” she asked.

“Where’s that dirty dog you call a husband? I know you possibly couldn’t have just decided to divorce him?” Dutchess retorted.

Just then we heard the front door shut and heavy feet hitting the floor.

“Laura, who car is that…”

“Well, I’ll be damned. You talk about the devil and he shall appear.” She smirked.

“What are they doing here?”

“What, because we’re all grown up and not defenseless anymore, we can’t be here?” I asked.

“I don’t have to listen to this shit,” he grumbled.

“Bullshit! You’re going to listen to what the fuck I have to say, Robert,” Dutchess yelled.

“And if I don’t?” he threw at her.

“And if you don’t, you’re going to be taking this gun up this ass just like you forced us to take your nasty ass dick up the ass,” I said as I pulled my gun out. “We can do this the easy way, or we can do this the hard way. You pick.”

“Jesus Christ! Bambi, put the gun away before you hurt somebody!” my mama yelled.

“Shut the fuck up because the way I’m feeling, you can eat a bullet, too! You’re no better than him!” I yelled at her.

Finally getting the message that I wasn’t playing with them, Laura and Robert sat their no good asses on the couch while Dutchess and I stood in front of them. I played the background and gave my sister the floor so she could get everything off her chest since this was her idea after all.

“I’m not going to stand here and tell you how you ain’t shit because you already know that. I just want to know why. Why would a father ever think it’s okay to rape his own daughters, his own flesh and blood, the two most precious things that he helped bring into this world? What type of sick shit is that?” Dutchess questioned.

“Bambi…she’s not mine,” he said.

“What?” Dutchess and I yelled.

“You muthafucka!” Laura yelled.

“Hold up, wait. What the fuck is he talking about?” I asked confused.

“Go ahead and tell her, Laura. Tell her how your slut ass cheated on me and got pregnant by another man. I don’t know how you thought I would never know, she’s dark as fuck! Look at me and look at you! Come on now, I’m no dummy!” Robert yelled.

“So because she cheated on you, you thought it was okay to take that shit out on me? You thought it would be okay to rape
me
because
you
r wife cheated on you?” I yelled with my gun pointed at him.

“This is just too fucking much for me,” Dutchess shook her head.

“And you?” I turned towards my mom. “You sat back and never said shit? You knew all along that he wasn’t my real father and that he was raping Dutchess and me but yet you stayed with his ass and never did shit about it?” I asked as my tears blurred my vision.

“I knew he wasn’t your father, Bambi, but don’t ever think I just sat back and didn’t do anything about it. That sick bastard’s days are slowly winding down, I can guarantee you that. He doesn’t have many days left on this earth,” she laughed like a mad woman.

Both Dutchess and I looked at each other confused as fuck because we had no ideas what she was talking about or why the fuck she was laughing like that.

“What are you talking about?” Dutchess asked.

“I’ve been poisoning his ass for years. If it’s not antifreeze, it’s arsenic. You say you’re no dummy but I really can’t tell,” she continued to laugh.

“You dumb bi…” Robert grabbed his chest like he was having a heart attack and fell to the ground.

“Oh shit!” Dutchess yelled as she jumped back.

I looked at Laura like she was a fucking lunatic because her ass just continued to sit there laughing. She looked up at us and suddenly her laughing stopped.

“You girls get out of here, I don’t want you to ever come back. I’m sorry, I really am,” she said with a far off look in her eyes.

“Come on, Bam,” Dutchess said as she grabbed my hand.

I quickly put my gun back in my purse as we ran out of the house. I was still in shock about what the fuck had just taken place right before my eyes. Within minutes, I found out that Robert really wasn’t my dad to watching the man die right in front of me. That shit was like something right out of a movie.

“You okay?” Dutchess asked me.

“Yea, I’m good. You?”

“Fuck him, that man didn’t mean shit to me and he shouldn’t mean shit to you either. I’ve seen worse shit when I was living on the street,” she said.

I just nodded my head because I didn’t know what to say to that.

-$-

After dropping Dutchess off, I was on my way to Adrina’s house to pick Majesty and Ca’Mir up so we could head back to the house when my phone started ringing. Seeing that it was Casino, I rushed to answer with a smile on my face but it was immediately wiped off when I put it on speaker and heard his end of the phone.

“Oooh shit, Casimir. Go deeper, baby,” a bitch moaned.

“Like that? That’s how you like it, huh?” he grunted.

That was all I needed to hear before I hung up the phone. I pulled over on the side of the road in rage as I tracked this muthafucka’s phone to get his location. I didn’t know who Casino thought I was but he had me fucked up. I was so pissed off that my hands were shaking as I got his location. Once I got where he was at, I immediately did a U-turn and pulled back into the road to head in the opposite direction.

“This nigga gonna make me catch a case tonight. Niggas always wanna take my kindness for a weakness but I guess I have to show him just who the fuck I am. Ooh, I’m about to fuck some shit up!” I ranted to myself.

I was thanking God there wasn’t a police officer in sight because I damn sure was doing bout eighty in a twenty-five, breaking all type of traffic laws.
Ask me do I give a fuck, though
, I thought. Traffic laws weren’t going to be the only thing I was going to be breaking tonight.

In less than fifteen minutes, I pulled up to an address in Royal Oak where I saw Casino’s car parked. Not giving a fuck who lived there. or who lived in the neighborhood, I pulled my gun out and banged on the door with it. I put my hand over the peephole and covered it up so they wouldn’t know it was me on the other side.

BANG BANG BANG BANG

I knocked impatiently. A few seconds later, it swung open and this bitch had the nerve to answer with an attitude.

“Can I help you?” she snapped.

“Where is Casino?” I asked as I pointed the gun right at her forehead.

“AHHHHH!” she screamed.

WHAP

“Shut the fuck up, bitch!” I said, slapping the shit out of her. “Casimir!” I yelled.

Lo and behold, this nigga came to the top of the stairs in nothing but a pair of sweat pants low around his waist, with no boxers on, further letting me know he just climbed out this bitch’s pussy. He looked like he saw a dead man as I shoved this bitch out of the way and walked towards him.

“Yo, baby, chill out and put the gun down.”

“Fuck you, nigga! This the type of shit we do, huh? I play little Suzy homemaker, take care of your kids, put up with your bullshit, and you go out and stick your dick and random bitches?” I yelled.

“Random? Baby, I can guarantee I was around before you and will be around after you,” this bitch had the nerve to say.

“Angela, chill the fuck out? What type of bullshit is you on?” Casino yelled.

“Angela, huh?” I asked as I bum rushed her ass. I forced her mouth open and shoved my gun in there. “Let’s see if you’ll have so much to say if I blow you fucking tongue out your mouth. Go ahead, bitch. Talk that shit now. Yea, that’s what the fuck I thought. I’m not China, hoe. I’m all bite and no bark, I will fuck you up,” I told her.

“Come on now, Choc. Just put that shit down,” Casino said as he walked up on me.