Where Words Fail (17 page)

All the air was pushed out of my lungs, and I had to fight to take a deep breath. He chuckled and stepped back before anyone saw our exchange. Wait, what was I supposed to be doing right now? Oh, that’s right... I’m supposed to be singing on national television. Fucking Jameson and his power over my body... And evidently my mind.

“Up next we have a lovely treat for everyone. Playing their new number one hit
Fight for Me
, give it up for Thirty Ought Six!”

Jameson

I couldn’t help but laugh. I always knew how to get Abby worked up. Tying her up... Yeah, it was a long shot since I hadn’t been with her in years, but I couldn’t resist. That fucking shirt was
amazing
! The black and red lace corset thing she was wearing had me constantly having to adjust myself. It hugged her curves like a dream, and it put her rack on a pretty nice display too. And paired with those black skin tight jeans she was wearing with her hair pinned back off her beautiful face but still hanging down her back, God damn, she’s hot! Her heels brought her just about chin level with me. She was just begging for me to make that comment about tying her up by asking me to, well, tie her up.

I have been good. I’ve kept my dirty mouth to myself even when she starts something. It’s been hard, but I’ve done it.

Waking up next to her has been amazing. Her curves pressed into mine. I love the sounds she makes when she’s sleeping. She moans. Sometimes while we’re sleeping, I’ll wake up, and I’d be rolling her nipples between my fingers. Her beautiful mouth will part, and she’ll push her breast further into my hands. My body gravitates towards her in my sleep. It’s crazy how much I crave her skin against mine.

Christ, we’re standing here getting ready to go play on Good Morning America and all I can think about is Abby and her gorgeous body pressed up against mine. The setup is pretty simple, nothing like the concerts. It’s just us, the instruments and the crowd. Intimate, yeah Abby was right when she said it was more nerve racking than a big show.

My nerves are getting the best of me. Before the whole tie me up thing from Abby, I couldn’t stand still. Every piece of my body was bouncing. But Abby got to me. She knew just how to calm me down, even though she was nervous too. She’s intimidated by the small shows too.

She said, ‘just sing to me’. Well, hell fucking yes I’ll sing this song about being in love with Abby, to Abby. Everything I sing, everything I play, I do it for her. Walking onto that stage with the people screaming, cameras flashing, people running around getting things ready. It was pretty intense.

We were standing this time, instead of sitting. Our guitars strapped on. The music started and everything except Abby and the music disappeared. She was tapping her fingers against the body of her acoustic waiting for her cue to come in. The words flew out of her mouth like she was born to sing this song. You could hear the emotion in her voice. It was raw, and it cut me to the core just hearing the words. This song kills me every time we sing it, but I love it at the same time.

The crowd joined in during the chorus. Her face cracked a smile, and I could tell she was trying to fight it. This song is not the kind of song you should smile through. Until the end that is. The end is why I want to sing this as much as I can. It is when we tell each other that we love one another. That surpasses every other song I have ever sung. By the end, we both turn towards each other, doing just what she had asked, I sang to her. I could see it in her eyes that she was starting to believe what I was telling her.

“Alright, alright.” Once we finished one of the anchors came up on stage to ask us some questions. “So before the show started we took some time to get some questions from the crowd that they wanted answers to. You guys ok with that?”

We all looked around at each other before Abby answered, “Heck yes we’re alright with that. Anything for you guys.” She winked at the crowd before turning back towards the girl standing on stage. I was so nervous that I couldn’t remember her name. “Alright, first question. How is the band dealing with Derek Jacobs being in rehab and do you know if or when he is coming back?”

We all kicked the question to Abby since she was the singer of this band and a head of the label. This was, however, something that is constantly on my mind. “Ahh, well... Having Derek leave was hard. He was family and losing family is always tough... But we seem to be doing well. Derek handpicked the amazingly talented Jameson Williams here to fill his void. We miss him like crazy but he’s getting the help he needs. As for if or when he’s coming back, well, we aren’t sure yet. We’re taking it one day at a time and we’ll go from there when he gets better.”

“Alright, this one’s for Jameson.” I bowed my head, and I think I just might be blushing. I hate that I’ve been singled out, but I guess I should get used to it. “How are you adjusting to life in the spotlight? It’s gotta be weird jumping into a band that’s so popular.”

I laughed. “I’m getting there. I mean, it’s a huge change from what I was doing before. The fact that I was chosen to be part of this band, no matter if it is only a temporary thing, has been amazing.” I paused for a second and found Abby’s eyes and held them in my gaze. “It’s brought some absolutely amazing people into my life and I can’t thank these guys enough for letting me be a part of it.” Abby grinned before turning her attention back to the questions.

“So, this song...
Fight for Me
. It was written in an odd manner and then played in front of the crowd in Bangor, Maine before anyone had heard it, including yourselves, correct?”

“Yeah,” Abby started, hesitating slightly while she tried to remember the story that we had all come up with. Her fingers were clicking together nervously. “It was different. I guess it started out as a bet. Something nobody thought we could do. We wrote the music together and then Jameson and myself took some time apart and wrote our pieces of the song. When we were done we handed it off to the amazing Jason and AJ.”

The women in the crowd screamed. She laughed. ”Yeah, they are pretty amazing. Not too shabby looking either, right? So anyway, they put the words where they needed to go, gave us our cues on when to come in and bam. The music and cues were rehearsed but none of us heard all the words to the song before the night we sang it. Those two were the only ones that knew what the whole song said. Thank goodness it worked out though!”

“Worked out pretty well? It’s your fastest climbing song to date! Alright, this is for the three guys... Relationship status boys... Spill.”

AJ leaned into the mic hanging over his drum set. “Single baby. Too many pretty ladies to choose right now... But sooner or later I’ll find someone who loves me enough to tame me.” He winked before pointing at Jason who was putting his bass on the stand before he spoke. He ran his hand over his mohawk and smiled.

“I’m single too but not quite as much of a man whore... Oh shit... Can I say that on TV... Or that...” Everybody laughed. “Uhh... I’m just going to go with I don’t get around quite as much as AJ.”

“All right Jameson... What about you? Everybody wants to know about the new guy.”

“I’m technically single... But I’m totally off the market.”

“Does this have anything to do with the song?”

“Yes ma’am. It has everything to do with my half of the song, but that’s all you’re getting out of me, beautiful.”

“You guys are this huge band that hits a lot of different genres. What do you listen to?”

“Honestly,” Abby began. “I listen to everything but I listen to A LOT of country.”

Jason took over the mic and spoke for the rest of us with us just nodding along. “Uh, I think that goes for all of us. I’m thinking that’s why there’s been so much crossover. With the exception of a few songs they can pretty much be considered multi genre.”

“Alright, one last question and this one is directed towards the ever lovely Miss Abby Irons. Well, this is a lot different than the other questions but it’s still a good one... What’s your stand on domestic abuse?”

Abby’s fingers stopped their nervous tapping. Her face went white and her eyes wide with fear as she searched the crowd. I knew who she was looking for because the rest of us were too. There was no way this was a coincidence. No way in hell. Abby was trying her hardest not to freak out. To hold it in at least until we got off camera and out of the public eye. Her chest was rising and falling frantically while she tried to spit the words out of her mouth.

“Um... Domestic abuse. God I can’t even describe how I feel about that. It’s horrible. No one should ever use force to get their way or to dominate someone else. I-I can’t even begin. The way I see it is, it’s someone who needs help. If they’re willing to hurt someone like that then they obviously need severe mental help. As for the people being abused, you’re worth more than that. Don’t stand for it. It’s never going to be a one-time thing even if they apologize. Get out, stand up for yourself and never let anyone make you think you’re worth less than you are.”

“Ok enough questions. We have time for one more song so... How about it?” She looked towards Abby. Crap, she noticed the change in her too. Abby nodded quickly and walked up to AJ and Jason first before coming to me.

“We’re going to play
Minute Man.
”

I leaned over into her ear. “You ok? You sure you want to do this?” She nodded and gave me a tight smile.

“Alright y’all. We’re going to do one of the more, uh, entertaining songs... Sing along if you know someone like this.”

AJ started beating against his drum set to get us started. I could tell Abby was trying to keep it together for this song but I’m also thinking she chose this song for a reason.

I bet you don’t remember me

I’m just some girl you used to see
I just wanna let you in on this

Oh- your cocky little attitude

Don’t make the girls wanna look at you

It’s all they’ll ever see

But you’ll always just be

The minute man to me

I used to fake it

When I screamed your name

Just

To get to get you off of me

Oh oh baby

You never could satisfy me

I don’t ever wanna feel your hands on me...

When we were done and released off stage, we rushed out back to the green room. As soon as we closed the door Abby dropped to her knees sobbing. AJ pushed me towards her, and I picked her up and carried her towards the couch. Her head was tucked under my chin as I rocked her back and forth rubbing my hand up and down her back trying to calm her down.

Her words were jumbled as she tried to talk to us. Paul and one of the other security guys he brought with us were outside scanning the crowd to see if Matt was there, but it was a bust. We finally gave up trying to calm her down and called Alex. After telling him what happened, he talked to her. No clue what he said, but it worked. She started taking deep breaths and finally calmed down enough to get changed so we could get to the plane and get home.

Abby

I love being home. I love being on the road too. It is kind of my home, but nothing compares to being able to see Alex and Izzy in person. Skype doesn’t do anything for me except make me feel like I’m losing out. Izzy is a riot and loves everyone. She was leery of Jameson at first because she was there for the first exchange between all of us when we figured out who he was. But that has changed drastically since the Matt situation occurred.

Since then if she’s not with Alex and me, she’s with Jameson. I still can’t figure out why she’s always high fiving him either. Sometimes she will just randomly walk up and slap his hand. He gave up questioning it. She’s his new music buddy, and I don’t think I’ve ever seen her happier. I actually think the other guys are jealous. Music to her, before Jameson came along, was something between me and her or her and Alex, or it had to be all of us together. She didn’t hang out with the guy’s one on one like she does with Jameson.