Authors: Sara Craven
'That's a pity,' she went on, 'because that's a lovely guitar. It must have cost a
lot of money. Have you had it long?'
Again, after a long pause, that infinitesimal shake of the head.
Catriona tried again. 'What's your favourite tune? I've got several.'
She began to reel off names of well-known folk songs, but Mitch's face was
unresponsive.
'Do you know this one?' Catriona tried her with the refrain of the
Skye Boat
Song.
'Or maybe this?' On an impulse she switched to a particular favourite
of hers, the plaintive swing of the
Eriskay Love Lilt
, humming the chorus
until she got to the last phrase, 'Sad am I without thee', which she sang in her
warm, clear soprano. And this time there was a response.
Mitch leapt to her feet, the stool crashing to the ground. She still cradled her
guitar in her arms, but her eyes blazed.
'Leave me alone, can't you?' Her voice rose almost hysterically to a shriek
and she rushed out of the room. Catriona stared after her, bewildered by the
reaction. It wasn't what she had hoped for, she thought unhappily, but at
least it was a beginning—of sorts.
She was still depressed when she got back to the flat that night, and Sally
lent her a sympathetic ear.
'What you need,' she announced at the end of the recital of the day's woes, 'is
taking out of yourself. How would you like to go to a party?'
'A party?' Catriona perked up a little. 'Whose?'
'Now for the bad news—Moira's. She's having some people round to her flat
tomorrow night and she's invited me for some obscure reason. And I was
told I could "bring my little Highland flatmate" along.' She grinned at
Catriona's instant grimace. 'Yes, I know, but Moira's parties are generally
regarded as fun and you might surprise yourself and enjoy it. You've been
looking like Marley's ghost for days.'
Catriona shook her head hesitantly. 'I—I've nothing to wear.'
'Liar,' Sally said roundly. 'What about that Ondine thing you've got hidden
in a box on the wardrobe?'
'It can stay there.' Catriona was conscious of a sudden tight sensation in her
throat. 'I—I don't want to wear that again.'
There was a brief silence while Sally studied her, and then she said
triumphantly, 'Of course—you can wear the Mistake.'
'Thanks a lot!' Catriona was amused, but Sally waved a hand at her
impatiently.
'Mistake for me, but on you it could be sensational,' she said, uncurling
herself from the settee and vanishing into the bedroom. Her voice came
floating back. 'I bought it foran audition because it suited the role I was
trying for. Madness, really, because they both couldn't have been more
wrong for me. I didn't get the part and I was stuck with the dress. Sheer
disaster, darling, from beginning to end.'
She returned with a drift of filmy whiteness over one arm. 'Try it on,' she
urged, and Catriona complied, a little reluctantly. But once the zip was
fastened and the soft folds of the incredibly full skirt twitched into place,
Catriona was forced to admit that Sally could be right. It was a dress for
dreaming in, all innocence and demureness. The sweeping neckline barely
acknowledged her shoulders and only hinted at the rounded softness of her
breasts. The wide, semi-transparent sleeves belled to the wrists where they
were captured into a narrow ruffle. Anything less suitable for Sally's lively
directness would have been hard to envisage.
She thought almost idly, 'I look like a bride.' But it was not a happy thought
and looking in the mirror at her shadowed eyes and mouth grown wistful,
she hated her own vulnerability.
At her shoulder, Sally said gently, 'You don't have to go, you know.'
Catriona's chin lifted with some of her old defiance.
'I'll go,' she said. 'And I'll wear the dress, if I may. It's beautiful.'
As she hung the dress back in the wardrobe, her hands were shaking. She
had no doubt at all that Jason Lord would be at Moira's party. All she had to
do was seek him out and ask him to help her to get an appeal for the centre
on television. He had so many contacts in the media, he would surely know
how to help. She told herself this over and over again, trying to convince
herself, to bolster up her confidence when every instinct she possessed
shrank from such a course of action. She couldn't pretend he would have
forgotten their last encounter and its stormy ending.
And yet here she was approaching him yet again. It would serve her right,
she told herself, if she met with total rejection. But at the same time, she
knew she had to go through with it for the centre's sake. Even if she met with
a downright refusal, at least she would know that she had tried.
But when she and Sally finally stood in Moira's cramped hall, all her
uncertainties allied to overwhelming shyness came back to plague her.
'Hell!' Sally looked at her watch. 'We're nearly half an horn: late and we're
still the first to arrive. What's the betting Moira's not even dressed yet?'
The young Filipino girl who had admitted them took their wraps and asked
them in charmingly accented English to wait in the living room.
Catriona gasped when she looked around her. Walls and carpet were a stark
white. Everything else—upholstery and drapes—was a rich glowing red.
Sally sighed.
'Only Moira would dare with hair that colour,' she said.
Catriona nodded slowly. The room was spectacular but in spite of its colour,
curiously unwelcoming. But at the same time she felt a sense of relief that
she and her pale dress could sink into obscurity against the walls if she
wished.
Moira, when she appeared, was no less spectacular than her background.
She had chosen a tight sheath of a dress, the starkness of its predominating
black relieved by narrow golden stripes. It fitted her voluptuous body as if
she had been sewn into it and the deep plunge of the neckline left little to the
imagination. Her scent, sensuous and musky, seemed to fill the room as she
entered, her hips swinging provocatively beneath the revealing lines of her
gown.
'Darlings!' A smile which never reached her eyes embraced them both.
Without uttering another word, she appraised their dresses and dismissed
them before sauntering to the enormous hi-fi unit which almost filled one
wall and switching on something low-keyed and Latin-American with an
insidious sophisticated rhythm.
'And that's just the rehearsal. Imagine the performance!' Sally murmured
under its cover.
Catriona ducked her head to hide her smile as Moira's voice, insinuatingly
sweet, reached them.
'Actually, you could be angels and help me. Poor Jasmine hasn't had much
experience with parties and she staged rather a drama over the canapes
earlier. If you would just pop into the kitchen and see that all is well, I'd be
eternally grateful.'
There was a stunned silence. Glancing at Sally, Catriona saw angry flags of
colour flying in her cheeks, but when she spoke her voice and smile were as
sweet as Moira's.
'Of course we don't mind. And if you found us some aprons, we could
always hand drinks round as well.'
It was Moira's turn to redden. 'I think that's going a little too far,' she said
coldly, and returned to her task of selecting records from the crowded
shelves of the unit.
'I knew there was an ulterior motive behind that invitation,' Sally muttered
when they were in the kitchen, surveying the trays of mouthwatering
delicacies that had been set out there. 'She just wanted some extra unhired
help for the evening. I'm sorry to have got you into this, love. I thought
you'd enjoy a showbiz party.'
'And so I shall—as it's my first and probably my last.' Catriona gave a
reluctant grin. 'I don't think Moira will forgive either of us in a hurry for that
crack of yours about aprons!'
In many ways it turned out to be quite fun, putting finishing touches to the
buffet, as Jasmine was soon kept busy running backwards and forwards to
let people in and, seemed pathetically grateful for their help. The girls
gathered that Moira's contribution to the proceedings had been to spend the
afternoon on her bed, giving contradictory orders through her face pack,
and that Jasmine who had been with her for two weeks was now looking for
another job.
By the time they returned to the living room, the party was in full swing and
Catriona hung back a little, beset with another bout of shyness. The room
seemed incredibly crowded. A space in the middle had been cleared for
dancing, and a number of couples were already swaying to the soft sinuous
rhythms coming from the hi-fi. Catriona found herself a glass of fruit juice
and stood quietly in a corner, amusing herself by trying to match names to
some of the more recognisable faces, but the face she was really searching
for was not there.
Catriona felt her heart sink. The only reason she had come to the party was
to see Jason. She had rehearsed in her mind almost a hundred times what she
was going to say to him, how she was going to present the centre's case in
such a way that he could not refuse to help. And it was only nervousness at
the possibility of his refusal, she told herself resolutely, that was making her
heart pound in this oddly fierce way and her body feel cold and clammy in
spite of the heat of the room.
She knew she was being a fool to pin so much hope to this idea. A fool to
think he would even listen to her—after the other evening. But those
memories were taboo, she tried to remind herself, as that aching languor
crept into her limbs again at the thought of his body against hers. She must
forget all about that, as he undoubtedly would. No man, especially one like
Jason Lord, would want to remember that he had been rejected by an
unsophisticated girl, she thought painfully. And why should he care, when
there were always women like Moira to give him everything he demanded?
Women who were not always conscious that their background and
upbringing totally renounced the kind of permissive relationships that
seemed an acceptable part of Jason's world.
Catriona had never had any difficulty in assimilating the strict pre-marital
morality of the community round Torvaig, but, as she was forced to
acknowledge to herself, this might have been because no serious
temptations had ever presented themselves. Aunt Jessie's strictures on the
respect a man should have for an unmarried girl had melted into oblivion
under Jason's lips and hands. And if he had aroused cravings in her flesh that
only he could satisfy— well, that was something she would have to try and
live with. For the moment, the centre and the people who depended on its
continuation were all-important, and her pride and emotions would have to
take second place.
Sally appeared at her side. 'Circulate,' she hissed, 'or Moira will have you
back in the kitchen washing glasses!'
Catriona chuckled and was just going to accompany Sally to meet some of
the theatre club actors she was working with, when she was suddenly aware
of a new arrival. Jeremy, on his own, was standing just inside the door
looking round. Before Catriona could look away or lose herself in the
laughing group already closing round Sally, he had seen her. She groaned
inwardly. He was the last person she had expected to see. She had forgotten
that his fiancee was related to Moira Dane.
'Trina.' He reached her side and stood smiling down at her. 'What a
surprise!'
'I was just thinking the same,' she tried to sound noncommittal. 'Er—where's
Helen tonight?'
'Oh, she had to go north unexpectedly. Her grandmother is ill or something.'
'Didn't she want you to go with her?' Catriona looked at him curiously.
'Out of the question, I'm afraid,' he said airily. 'Far too much on at work. But
I was at a loose end tonight, so I decided to take advantage of Moira's
invitation.' He gave her the smile that had once had the power to charm the
heart from her body. 'But how come you're here, Trina? I, didn't know you
and Moira were friends.'
Catriona shrugged. 'I was invited along to make up numbers with Sally, I
suppose,' she answered awkwardly.
He smiled again and toofc her hand. 'Things couldn't have worked out
better, could they?' he said softly. 'Come and dance with me.'
Catriona hesitated, intensely conscious of Moira's speculative gaze fixed on
them from across the room. Quite apart from her own lack of inclination,
she could imagine Jason Lord's reaction if he was to arrive and find her with
Jeremy.
'Come on,' Jeremy urged impatiently, and with an inward sigh, she
accompanied him to join the other dancers. The last thing she wanted was