“How
are you going to do it, Sam? How are you going to forget about this? Tell me. I
need to know because I don’t know how the hell I’m going to get through this.”
The
frantic despair in his eyes punctures my heart. I actually feel it shatter into
a thousand pieces.
“One
day at a time, that’s how you’ll cope. You don’t have a choice.” I reply
calmly, knowing my voice sounds distant and cold.
Little
does he know my sister is not the only one who can act…
“And
you’re going to be ok? You’ll be able to watch me with her? You’ll be ok watching
me kiss her, marry her and one day have a baby with her? You’re going to be
fine with all of that?” He yells, angrily wrenching my whole body around to
face him.
“Of
course I won’t be fine with it but I don’t have any other choice! She’s my
sister and I love her. You belong to Rachel, she’s your fiancé and you love
her. We both agreed that this would only be a one-time thing, Zack. You said
that it was something we needed to do to move past this and get over this…
thing between us.”
“Thing?
Is that all you think we are?” He snarls contemptuously, glowering at me in
rage.
“What
else would you call it?” I confront him, furious that he’s actually prepared to
do this to me.
“I
don’t know! I don’t know how to define us or how I can even begin to explain my
feelings to you. I’m so confused, so mixed up and just… wrecked from this whole
damn thing. All I know is how much I want you, how agonising it’s going to be
for me to let you go after tonight. I don’t think I can do it.”
I’m
about to respond to him but he cuts me off, pressing his irresistible mouth
against mine. He forces my lips apart with his tongue, demanding an entry.
“Zack,
no. We can’t.”
“Yes.
Yes we can. You want this too, Samantha. I know you want me and you know I can
make you feel good. I can make you feel so damn good. Let me prove it to you,
baby. Please.”
He
talks softly, murmuring those deliciously sensual words right into my ear,
showering my neck and jaw with kisses. I try to deny him, I really do try.
However, I’ve come to learn that there’s just something about this man,
something I simply can’t resist. He has this hold over me and it’s unlike
anything I’ve ever known. There’s no point in trying to fight it or deny it any
longer, if now is all we have… then I need to embrace and grab hold of every
single second.
Zack
makes love to me again for a second time. It’s just as incredible as the first
time we had sex but it’s also different. We take our time, we don’t rush and we
make it last. Every moment counts, our time together is precious and deserves
to be treated as such.
“Open
your eyes. Keep your eyes open when I make you come.” He instructs me, lifting
my legs high in the air.
He
can penetrate me so deeply in this position, every single inch of him is inside
me and the euphoric pleasure he makes me experience is indescribable.
“It
feels so good. I want to come so bad, please make me come.” I beg him, circling
my arms around his neck as I pull him down towards me for another breath-taking
kiss.
“Don’t
worry, I intend to.” He flashes a wicked grin at me, his smouldering brown eyes
landing on my moving breasts underneath him. “Touch them, let me see you play
with them.”
I
gasp, surprisingly aroused and excited by his request. I quickly do as he asks,
squeezing my moderately sized breasts as I watch his eyes light up with desire.
“Like
this?” I ask him, wondering if I’m doing it right.
“Yeah,
just like that. Gently circle your nipples with your fingers… that’s right. Now
tweak them, roll them between your fingers and pull.”
His
breathing is laboured and erratic, droplets of perspiration fall from his
forehead onto my heaving breasts and I rub the moisture into my skin,
delighting in the animated expression on Zack’s face.
“Sam....”
He pants breathlessly, lifting my legs even higher in the air. “Can I, would it
be ok if I…?”
“Yes,
I want you to.” I reply hastily, moistening my lips in anticipation.
I
know exactly what he wants and I have no intention of disappointing him. He thrusts
himself inside of me several times before he pulls out, swiftly moving up my
body. His hand grips his huge arousal, pumping it up and down in hard, fast
strokes.
“Push
them together.” He commands. “I’m going to come all over them. They’re so
beautiful.”
I
do as he asks without thought or question. It’s as though he’s got me under
some sort of spell. I’m magnetically drawn towards him and his desires, no
matter how dirty or erotic they might be. Never in my life did I think that I
would be as brazen or as forward as this. I know I’m going to torture myself
about this later. The guilt will consume me, it will tear me to shreds and it
will be impossible for me to pick up the pieces but right now… I don’t care.
“Come
for me. Come on me.” I moan loudly, arching my back and lifting my chest,
desperate to feel the warmth of his release on my skin.
Zack
groans loudly, resting one of his hands against the headboard behind me. His
other hand continues to slide up and down his magnificent arousal, violently
frantic when it comes to reaching his climax. When his warmth finally spills
onto my breasts, it’s enough to set my whole body alight. There’s a blazing
inferno inside of me, an explosion of blistering, fiery heat.
“
Fuck!
”
He moans explicitly, watching himself unload onto my pale breasts and pink
nipples.
I
observe him in fascination. The raw, animalistic urgency on his face and the carnal
lust in his eyes. Without thinking, I continue to massage my breasts, rubbing
Zack’s rousing release into my skin. If anyone had asked me before tonight what
I thought of such an act, I would have told them I found it repulsive. Now,
nothing could be more sensual to me.
He
rolls onto his side, pulling my body against his. I stroke my fingers through
his dark hair, relishing in the intimacy of the moment and the closeness that
comes with being together like this.
“I’ve
never done anything like that before in my life.” I admit softly, pressing my
lips against his ear.
“Good.
I’m glad.” He retorts sharply.
I’m
almost tempted to ask him if he’s ever done that with Rachel but quickly
realise how intrusive and personal that is. I have no right to ask him those
questions and I realise I really don’t know want to know the answer.
“I’ll
be right back.” I whisper, climbing out of bed.
It’s
two in the morning and want to get cleaned up before I curl in beside him. I’m
pretty much exhausted after all of the hours we’ve spent in this hotel room
pleasuring one another. The thing I crave the most right now is sleep.
I’ve
just finished cleaning myself up and I’m in the middle of brushing my teeth
when I hear Zack getting out of bed.
“Sam?
Where are you? Where did you go?”
He stumbles into the bathroom with bleary eyes and messed up hair. He obviously
fell asleep and woke up to find me gone.
“I’m
just cleaning my teeth before bed.” I tell him, rinsing my mouth with some
water.
“I
thought you’d gone.” He walks up behind me, resting his chin on the top of my
head.
He’s
so much taller than me, he’s over six feet and I’m barely five foot three.
“I
told you I would stay. I promise I won’t sneak out of here.”
“You
swear?” He asks me doubtfully, turning me around to face him.
“I
swear.” I assure him, giving him a weak smile.
“Good
because there are so many things I plan on doing to you before you leave.”
“You’re
not tired of me yet?” I joke.
“I
could never get tired of you. Never.” He replies solemnly.
He
illustrates his point by hoisting me up onto the bathroom counter, quickly
sliding my silk nighty over my head. I’m just about to protest, I’m about to
say that we really should go to bed and get some sleep… and then he touches me.
Kneeling
down before me, he prises my legs apart. Plunging his tongue all the way inside
me. I squirm and writhe about on the counter, desperately trying to evade and
seek the pleasure he is giving me at the same time.
“I
really want you to come in my mouth, baby. You taste incredible, like heaven to
me.”
His
words embolden me to let go, throwing my head back as I buck my hips, grinding
my core against his mouth. His tongue is persistent, licking sucking and
stroking my inner walls as his thumb plays with my clitoris.
“Feels…
so fucking good. Don’t stop.” I plead with him, knowing my whole body will
explode with frustration resentment if he stops what he’s doing for just a
second.
“Use
me, baby. Take what you need. Fuck my tongue with that sweet little pussy.”
The
exquisite liberation I feel is extraordinary. Never in my whole life have I
felt so free, so sexy or so turned on. Zack makes me feel beautiful, he makes
me feel like my arousal is beautiful and no one in my life has ever made me
feel that way. Before him, I viewed sex as being something I should be ashamed
of, something that was wrong and dirty. I know who is to blame for making me
feel that way. Who hurt me and damaged me beyond repair.
Harry.
No.
No, I will not think about him right now. I can’t. Don’t let him in, Samantha.
Don’t let him win.
I
come right back to the present when Zack’s fingers separate my folds, opening
me up even more to him. He softly blows against my hot skin, heightening the
need I have to come again.
“Fuck.
You’re absolutely perfect, Sam. You’re beautiful, this pussy is beautiful and
it belongs to me.” When I don’t respond to him right away he looks up at me,
frowning when I still don’t acknowledge what he said. “Tell me who your pussy
belongs to, Sam.”
“Zack…”
“Say
it.” He demands, tightening the grip he has on my thighs. It’s enough to leave
me with fingerprints and the truth is I hope it does.
“It
belongs to you.” I murmur self-consciously.
“Say
it properly.” He growls, his mouth hovering right over my slick, burning
centre.
“My…
pussy belongs to you.”
“That’s
right. It does. It belongs to me and the sooner you accept that the better it
will be. No one else can make you feel like this. No one else could do this to
you and they’re not going to. You’re sealed to me, you’re mine.”
We
both know how ridiculous and nonsensical this sounds. How on earth can he call
me his when he belongs to my sister? I don’t belong to him and he will never be
mine, the two of us know this and yet we’re both willing participants in this
wrong and twisted game of pretend.
He
tastes me again, his tongue gliding right down the centre of myself. I tremble
violently from his touch, craving more and more of this unexplainable bliss. I’m
so close to the edge, the extremity of his caress is out of this world.
All
of that changes in an instant.
Zack’s
fingers make their way to my entrance, slowly probing their way inside me. His
action causes my entire body to freeze with fear. I need to stop him, I need to
tell him that he can’t do this to me but my mouth won’t move. I’m numb,
immobilised and paralysed with terror.
“Baby,
what’s wrong? Did I hurt you? Are you ok?”
His
words somehow manage to penetrate through the panic and alarm that surrounds me
as I’m yanked back into the present moment.
“I-I’m
sorry.” I stammer, covering my face with my hands.
“Hey,
it’s ok. Come here. Shh, it’s alright.” He jumps to his feet, cradling my
quivering body in his arms.
The
warmth from his embrace instantly soothes me. His voice calms me in a way I
never knew was possible, easing all of my anxiety and horror.
“That
was really stupid of me, I’m sorry.”
“Don’t
apologise, its fine.” He places a gentle kiss on my forehead, stroking his
fingers through my hair.
“You
must think I’m such a freak.”
“I
don’t. Don’t even say that. I’m just concerned, I need to know what caused you
to react that way.”
“It’s
not your fault. I just… don’t like that.”
“Ok.”
He says softly, allowing me to gain some composure over myself. “Any reason
why?”
He’s
asking me why I don’t like to receive digital penetration. It’s a simple enough
question and under normal circumstances, a relatively simple answer would be
sufficient.
“I
just don’t. Can we please drop this now?” I snap, lifting myself down from the
bathroom counter as I shove him out the way.
“Sam,
don’t walk away from me.” He says grabbing hold of my arm.
“Let
me go. I said let me go!” I yell, using all of my strength to keep him away
from me.