A Heart for Freedom (44 page)

Ten years ago, she asked the question again. This time, however, rather than questioning God in anger, she quieted her heart and waited for him to answer. At that moment, the image reappeared in her mind that had haunted her for the past ten years: a young student, dying of a gunshot wound, his face covered with blood, but still repeating as he lay on the ground, “Persevere until the end, persevere until the very end. . . .”

Just then, she saw another figure, coming up slowly from far away. He also had blood covering his face, but Li was not afraid or shaken. Even though she could not see him clearly, she recognized him as he walked up calmly, with peace and dignity. Then the picture of the young, dying student and the approaching figure merged into one, and Li heard a gentle voice say, “How could you not know where I was? I was right here.”

Li said she instantly burst into tears. A deep wound, which had been open for ten years, was finally healed.

As I read Li’s journal entry, I felt my own wounded spirit being healed as well. After twenty-two years, the question of my heart was answered.
Jesus, you were right there with us, on the front line. And you are with my friends in heaven. We will carry on the good work you have prepared for us, persevering until the very end!

As we wait to see the fulfillment of God’s purpose and plan, we will stay firm and hold fast to his promises:

He will wipe every tear from their eyes, and there will be no more death or sorrow or crying or pain. All these things are gone forever. (Revelation 21:4,
NLT
)

All who are victorious will inherit all these blessings, and I will be their God, and they will be my children. (Revelation 21:7,
NLT
)

And we pray without ceasing, “Lord Jesus, in your timing, do it swiftly!”

* * *

Dear friend, now that you have walked with me through my entire journey, it would not be fair if I left without sharing with you the question Brother Yun once asked me that changed my life forever:
Are you ready to walk with Jesus?

If you’re ready to begin the journey to achieve life-transforming freedom, simply say the following prayer and put your trust in Jesus:

Dear Jesus, I now know that you are my God and my Savior. Please forgive all my sins, known and unknown, and please come into my heart, guide my life, and bring me to freedom. Amen.

If you’ve decided to take this first step, please feel free to e-mail me at [email protected]. I would love to hear from you.

Acknowledgments

As I look back at my life to this point, my heart is filled with gratitude. So many people have helped me arrive where I am today. Each one of you has my thanks, even if your name falls beyond the limits of my immediate memory. Please forgive me—and remind me.

First, I want to thank my mom and dad, who gave life to me and taught me service and sacrifice by the way they lived their lives. I thank them for how much they loved me and stood by me. I also thank my grandma, who raised me and taught me hard work and compassion.

Next, I want to thank the countless friends I met and made during the fifty days of the Tiananmen movement. Many of your names I never knew or can’t remember, but your faces, your passion, your trust, your boundless courage and devotion will always be part of my life and my memories of those days. You are always my inspiration. I want to especially thank those with whom I worked directly: Feng, Boli, Xiongyan, Fengsuo, Chang Jin, Wang Dan, Li Lu, and the many Hong Kong student leaders who came to support us in Beijing and stood with us until the last hour, including Lanju, another sister.

I am thankful for so many people—Beijing citizens, doctors, news reporters, Chinese government officials, some military soldiers and officers, and friends and supporters around the world—who stood in solidarity with the students. I am very thankful to the friends and supporters from Hong Kong, Taiwan, and overseas, who donated time and resources to support the movement.

I want to acknowledge all who have suffered and all who continue the struggle—especially those who gave their lives and freedom in pursuit of a better China and a more loving and peaceful world. I particularly want to acknowledge the courage and perseverance of the Tiananmen Mothers, who are continuing the struggle to bring justice on behalf of their loved ones. You are our inspiration.

I want to thank the Western media, especially reporters and correspondents from CNN, CBS, ABC, BBC, VOA,
TIME
, and the
New York Times
for your courageous coverage of the events at Tiananmen Square that shook the world, shaped memories, and helped bring peaceful changes in Eastern Europe and the former Soviet Union. Your work has reached far and beyond—even to the recent revolution in the Middle East, when an Egyptian general declared that the situation there would not be like Beijing and there would not be another Tiananmen-like massacre.

I believe in the power of learning and education to transform the human mind and the human condition. I have been blessed with extraordinary teachers who have shaped my life, and I thank them all. From the beginning, my grade school teachers and math teachers helped me discover my passion for learning; their encouragement and praise set me on the track to future success.

My high school teacher and mentor, Mrs. Qian, taught me about Madame Curie and introduced me to the rich history and heritage of Peking University, our beloved Beida. Her encouragement for me to list Beida as my first school choice was a pivotal moment that shaped my history and affected China’s as well. My great teacher Han from high school recognized my abilities early on, encouraged my father, and never wavered in his support, even during the aftermath of the massacre when political pressure weighed upon him. My friends from that period of my life, both girls and boys, were an inspiration to me, and I thank you for being a blessing to me then and in my memories now.

My life blossomed at Beida, thanks to my first-year class director and so many wonderful professors, friends, and schoolmates who helped me come out of my shell of quiet shyness. Special thanks to a long list that includes Qing, Feng, Ping Ping, Xiu Sheng, my young friend from Hunan, my friend at CCTV, my campus newspaper editor, many of my roommates, and the coach of the running team (I will always remember your laughter, your jokes, and your stories). I want to thank the friend who opened the first café at Beida—I had a lot of fun helping you. I also want to thank Beijing Normal University’s child psychology director and several roommates and sisters who provided a loving community for me in the time after Beida.

I thank all the brave souls who work for human rights, freedom, and democracy around the world, often at great cost and risk to themselves. I want to thank Da Ge, Big Brother, and each and every one of the two-hundred-plus-member network that rescued and protected Feng and me during the most dangerous ten months of hiding after the Tiananmen massacre. It is because of your courage and sacrifice that I am still alive—and I am forever grateful. I pray for Jesus to be with you and bless you and your families through a thousand generations. I want to thank Ahong, whom we called Little Brother, who courageously rescued Feng and me out of China. I am thrilled to learn that you came to know Jesus and that the Lord has blessed you with a wonderful family and three beautiful children. I am very thankful to Szeto Wah (Uncle Wah) and other leaders from the Hong Kong Alliance, who rescued Feng and me to the free world after our escape from China, who also helped hundreds of other dissidents escape from China, and who even now continue to courageously and consistently support the democracy movement.

I am thankful for the help provided by Dimon Liu, David Phillips, Mary Daly, Michael Posner, and the leaders of the Chinese student federation in the United States during my first visit to America. I am grateful to Charles and Beth’s hospitality in Santa Fe, where I went to rest and recover.

I am very thankful to Jimmy Lai and Teresa Lai, whose generosity enabled me to stay in a hotel during my second time in Paris. I am especially grateful to Teresa, who radiated the love of Jesus during that very lonely and difficult time. She became a precious friend and a wonderful refuge during a time when it seemed the world was going to swallow me up. Teresa has a quiet demeanor, and her spirit is always filled with joy. She was like an angel sent by God. She helped me regain my appreciation for life, from the taste of Japanese noodles to the beautiful design of a perfume bottle. In the valley of life’s darkness, Teresa was a ray of sunshine.

I am thankful to those government leaders who were—and are—willing to put the cause of freedom and human rights first when the easy course would be to bow to China’s economic power. I am thankful to the French government and diplomats who gave me my first country of refuge and who cared for and protected me during my first few months in the West. Thanks also to Trudie Styler, for her kindness to me; to Congresswoman Nancy Pelosi, who was among the first US government leaders to visit me when I was in Paris; and to Vice President Dan Quayle, who welcomed me to the White House when I first came to the United States.

I thank the late Tom Lantos and the Tom Lantos Human Rights Commission for their tireless work to improve China’s human rights situation and for honoring me with their Congressional Human Rights award. Thank you to Senators Malcolm Wallop and Edward Kennedy and their staffs for hiring me and giving me good insights into democracy at work and to Lianchao, who helped me find a summer residence during my DC internships.

I thank President Bill Clinton for his personal negotiation with the Chinese government to bring my family out from China to be reunited with me; and his trusted adviser (and my friend) Nancy Soderberg, who helped put my family on the list for this negotiation. I thank the people I met in the administrations of Presidents George H. W. Bush, George W. Bush, and Barack Obama, who have continued to press China to reform its terrible record on human rights, religious freedom, and the rule of law. I have seen many leaders in America rise up to defend freedom—from the time of Tiananmen in 1989, when our friend and summer neighbor Ambassador Ray Burghardt and his wife, Susan, searched the hospitals in Beijing for the dead and wounded; to the late Ambassador James R. Lilley, who documented his eyewitness account of Tiananmen in his moving memoir,
China Hands
; to the recent book by our friend Governor Mitt Romney,
No Apology
, calling out the great risk to our own future freedom posed by the Communist government of China.

I applaud Secretary of State Hillary Clinton’s criticism of China’s human rights record during President Hu Jingtao’s visit to Washington, DC, in January 2011. I am thankful to Wenchi Yu, Ambassador Melanne Verveer, and many other leaders for their concern about China’s inhuman one-child policy and its devastating consequences in gendercide and a massive gender imbalance. I was deeply moved by Speaker of the House John Boehner’s decision not to attend the state banquet in honor of President Hu and his willingness to speak out against China’s one-child policy; and we all cheered when House Foreign Affairs Committee Chairwoman Ileana Ros-Lehtinen challenged President Hu about ending forced abortions under the one-child policy. All that President Hu could do was deny that such practices ever existed in China. On behalf of the four hundred million babies lost due to this policy, we pray that God would continue to raise up great leaders who will call China to account for these atrocities and bring to an end to the biggest crime against humanity of our time.

I’m thankful for
The Economist
, the magazine that started global awareness of the one hundred million missing girls and continues to advocate for the cause. Also, thanks to Jamie Dean from
World
magazine and Tim Morgan and his colleague at
Christianity Today
for their work to raise awareness of this cause. I’m thankful for the efforts of the United Nations, through UNFPA, UNICEF, the UN Human Rights Office, UN Women, and the World Health Organization for their joint efforts to end gendercide.

I’m also thankful to Congressman Chris Smith of New Jersey, a great American and champion of freedom, whose constant work for the past thirty-one years to help improve China’s human rights conditions and end the one-child policy has been a heroic inspiration for me. His congressional hearings in November 2009 woke me up to the full magnitude of horror inflicted by China’s one-child policy. Congressman Smith’s integrity, humanity, and humility shine as a light on Capitol Hill as he does his work “as unto the Lord.”

As we were finishing the book, we also completed a campaign to build a coalition on Capitol Hill to end gendercide. In addition to Congressman Smith, I am grateful to Congresswoman Vicky Hartzler of Missouri, Congresswoman Sheila Jackson Lee of Texas, Congressman Joe Pitts of Pennsylvania, Congressman Bill Johnson of Ohio, and Congressman Jeff Fortenberry of Nebraska. I also thank Massachusetts Senator Scott Brown for his support, and his beautiful daughter Ayla for signing up for our All Girls Allowed gala.

I thank the Norwegian Parliament, which nominated me unanimously for the Nobel Peace Prize in 1989. I thank the Nobel Committee for courageously granting the 2010 Nobel Peace Prize to our colleague Liu Xiaobo, when many nations were afraid to continue to challenge China on its human rights record. That’s what the unprecedented three standing ovations were all about. Though we missed Liu during the ceremony, when the award was presented to an empty chair, we rejoiced at the injection of renewed hope and energy into the free China movement. After all the years of trials and tribulation, this was the first time we were thrown a big party and celebration. I thank the Norwegian people for all the missionaries they have sent to China. Your dedication and sacrifice are bearing fruit in a powerful way today.