A Place of Peace (16 page)

He grimaced. “She told Lilly?”

Beth Anne raised an eyebrow. “Are you afraid Miriam might find out?”

He stared at her, speechless.

“Miriam will know soon. In fact, with the way Naomi is celebrating, I’d wager she knows already.” Beth Anne clasped her hands to her hips. “Why didn’t you just speak to Miriam instead of taking the coward’s way out?”

“I did speak to her,” he began through gritted teeth.

“And?”

“She said I’m part of her past, and she’s moving forward. She’s courting Zach Fisher.”

Beth Anne’s expression was surprised. “Zach Fisher?”

“
Ya.
Zach Fisher. He was at her house for supper Wednesday when I went to see her.”

“That doesn’t make sense.”

He raised his eyebrows. “Why wouldn’t it make sense? Miriam has moved on, and so have I.”

“But just the other day, Miriam asked me if you’d ever cheated on her, and I told her you hadn’t. Then she explained about Lilly’s lie.”

“What?” He shook his head, shocked. “When did she ask you that?”

“Wednesday. I told her God could give you both a second chance, and I said to have faith. But she said you were courting Naomi. I thought you and Naomi were only friends, but I felt it wasn’t my place to tell her your business.”

Again, he groaned. “How did things get so confused?”

“I don’t know.” Beth Anne bit her lip. “I guess I should’ve told her that you and Naomi were only friends. And I should’ve told you that she was asking about you. However, I felt it was better to leave things in God’s hands.”

“But why was she asking about me if she was courting Zach?”

Beth Anne threw her hands up with frustration. “I have no idea. She never mentioned Zach to me.”

He folded his arms in front of his chest. “It doesn’t matter. She’s made her choice. She has Zach, and I have Naomi.”

Beth Anne scowled. “It’s all my fault. I should’ve stayed out of it and maybe now you and Miriam would be together.”

“It’s not meant to be.” His expression softened. “I know you mean well, but God doesn’t see us together.”

“But you love each other. You are supposed to be together.”

“You think she loves me?” He studied her eyes. Could Beth Anne be right? Does Miriam love me?

“Timothy!” a voice yelled behind them. “Get over here!”

Turning, he found Elizabeth, surrounded by his sisters, waving to him.

“I bet they pulled out the ice cream,” Beth Anne muttered as they started toward the crowd.

“We need to celebrate with some ice cream,” Elizabeth called, beaming. “My last
kind
is finally getting married.”

“Told ya,” Beth Anne whispered, smacking his shoulder.

The men and children joined the group of women, and Timothy wished he could crawl under a rock. He forced a smile as his gaze met Naomi’s wide grin.

“It’s about time,” Daniel called, his arms wrapped around his wife.

“We were beginning to worry about you,” Robert chimed in, and the crowd laughed in response.

Timothy and Beth Anne stepped through the fence and were swallowed up into the crowd. He approached Naomi, and the knot of relatives began to clap.

“I just couldn’t keep it to myself,” Naomi gushed, taking his hand in hers.

He gazed down at his bride and pushed a flyaway lock of hair back from her face. How could he hurt this woman, whose eyes shone with love only for him? He was meant to be with her and to forget Miriam.

“I’m so
froh,”
Naomi said.

“Me too,” he replied, praying that statement would come true.

Lindsay sank onto the swing and smiled at the scene unfolding in the pasture. “They sure are happy about Naomi’s announcement.”

“They get riled up about weddings, don’t they?” Jessica chomped her gum and fingered her necklace.

“I think
Englishers
are the same.” Lindsay leaned back and pushed the swing. “Everyone gets excited about weddings.
Aenti
Rebecca once made a comment that Elizabeth worried Timothy would never settle down.”

Jessica frowned. “You always talk about
‘Englishers,’
“ she began, using her fingers as quotations as she said the word, “as if you’re Amish. Linds, you’re not Amish. You’re a poser.” With hypercritical eyes, she gestured toward Lindsay. “You’re trying too hard to fit in. You need to just be Lindsay Bedford and not try so hard to be Lindsay Bedford, Amish girl.”

My own sister doesn’t get me. Or maybe she’s just not listening!

Lindsay gritted her teeth to stop the angry words from escaping her lips. Taking a deep breath, she silently counted to ten.

“What?” Jessica asked, still chomping her gum. “You look like you have something to say.”

“I don’t want to fight with you, Jessica,” Lindsay said, enunciating the words. “You’re going back to Virginia soon, and the last thing I want to do is let you leave on bad terms.”

Her older sister shrugged. “I’m not mad at you. I’m just stating the obvious.”

“That’s just it.” Lindsay angled her body toward her sister. “You keep saying that I’m posing as an Amish person, but this is who I want to be. You need to respect that this is my choice.” She pointed toward Jessica. “You do what’s right for you.” She then pointed to her chest. “And I’ll do what’s right for me. I don’t plan to join the church until I’m certain that this is the life I want to lead. But right now, it feels right, and you need to accept that or we’re going to have problems between us.”

Jessica’s expression softened. “You’re right.” Reaching over, she squeezed Lindsay’s hand. “I’m sorry for not respecting your decision.”

Lindsay smiled. “I forgive you. Just don’t do it again.”

“Deal.” Jessica looked toward the dirt road leading up to the house. “Jake decided to show up after all.”

Lindsay glanced toward the headlights as the pickup truck rumbled toward the house. The truck stopped in front of the barn and Jake climbed from the driver’s seat. The passenger door opened, revealing a tall, slender Amish man.

“I guess Jake has Matthew with him tonight,” Jessica said.

“Who?” Lindsay asked.

“He just moved here and started working at the furniture store.”

With Jake talking and Matthew frowning, they strolled toward the porch. Lindsay’s gaze was glued to Matthew, taking in his tall, lean physique. As he approached the porch, she was struck by brown curls escaping from beneath his straw hat. His eyes met hers and then darted toward the fence, where the cluster of Kauffman family members congregated.

“Hey there,” Jessica said, standing. “What are you guys up to this evening?”

“Not a whole lot.” Jake climbed the porch steps and leaned back against the railing. “We thought we’d come over and see what was going on at the Kauffman homestead.”

Matthew’s stare moved from the Kauffman clan to the toes of his boots. Lindsay longed to know why the man was so quiet. He looked to be approximately seventeen, and his clean-shaven face told her that he was single. She wished she could see his eyes.

“How’s it going, Matt?” Jessica asked. “Long time no see, huh?”

Matt looked up, his expression somber.

“I don’t think you’ve met my little sister. Matt, this is Lindsay.” Jessica gestured between them. “Linds, this is Matt Glick.”

“It’s nice to meet you,” Lindsay said, hoping his eyes would meet hers.

Matthew’s eyes met hers, and her pulse leapt. His eyes were a light shade of brown that was nearly golden. “You too,” he said, looking back toward the pasture.

Lindsay opened her mouth to speak but was overshadowed by Eli’s voice booming from the pasture.

“Matthew!” he called. “It’s so good to see you. Come visit with us, son!”

Matthew gave Lindsay another quick nod and then loped toward the fence. His slim body moved with a grace mirroring a gazelle.

“He doesn’t talk much at all, does he?” Jessica asked, as if reading Lindsay’s thoughts.

“No, he doesn’t.” Jake glanced across the pasture toward Matthew. “He’s a bit shy.”

Lindsay watched Matthew as he approached Eli. While the older man spoke, Matthew folded his arms.

Biting her lip, Lindsay watched Matthew lean on the fence. He turned and met her eyes and then quickly looked away. Lindsay hoped to learn more about Matthew Glick.

Miriam sat on the porch swing that evening and stared across the field at her father’s house. She longed to be welcomed back into that home and to feel the love of a family she missed so much.

Hannah and Edna had told her to give Abraham time, but she wanted to work things out soon. If she were going to consider courting and marrying Zach, then she wanted her family’s blessing. She wanted her future children to know their family.

She crossed the field and climbed the porch steps. She knocked on the door and waited a few moments. When no one answered, she turned the cool knob and entered the house.

Stepping into the foyer, she felt as if she’d traveled back in time. The house looked exactly as it had before she’d left. The foyer opened into a large living room with the same plain furniture and white walls. Memories made within that room consumed her—family devotionals, birthdays, Christmases, weddings, church services. She imagined her mother sitting in her favorite chair while quilting or giving much-needed advice.

Miriam closed her eyes, fighting the threatening tears. Oh, how she missed her family. How could she have left them? She walked through the living room to the large kitchen, but she didn’t see anyone. She padded through the laundry room to the mudroom and back porch. Still no one.

“Hello?” Miriam called, heading for the stairs. Not receiving an answer, she climbed the steep stairs.

“Hello?” she called down the silent hallway. She moved past her brother’s room and Hannah’s former room and then stopped in the doorway of the room she’d shared with Lilly since their birth.

Late-night talks with her younger sister, sharing hopes and dreams, twirled through her mind. Miriam tilted her head, reflecting how things hadn’t worked out the way they’d hoped. Neither of them was married. Neither had a family.

She crossed the room and stood by her sister’s battery-operated treadle sewing machine. A pile of unfinished quilts sat folded neatly beside it. Lifting the pile, she unfolded a purple and blue quilt created in the Lone Star pattern. She ran her fingers over the stitching, marveling at the intricate design.

Lilly was a talented quilter, and she’d learned all she knew from their mother. The two had sat together for hours quilting and talking. Miriam had spent her time in the kitchen with their grandmother learning all she could about Amish cooking, but she’d never learned to quilt very well. She could make a fairly decent quilt, but it would never have been as beautiful as Lilly’s.

Flipping through the pile of quilts, she found another in the Log Cabin pattern and a second Lone Star. She touched each one, imagining the hours her younger sister had spent on them. Like their mother once had, Lilly created them for
English
customers who had ordered them from Naomi King’s booth at the farmer’s market. Miriam was certain her parents were proud of Lilly for following in Bertha’s footsteps.

Unlike Miriam.

Sighing, Miriam refolded the quilts and set them down where they’d been, next to the sewing machine. Turning, she found a stack of books on the floor. She reached down and moved the books, glancing through the covers. Each title and cover seemed to be a Christian novel. Miriam recalled how Lilly would keep the lamp burning well past their bedtime in order to continue reading, despite Miriam’s requests to turn the light off and go to sleep. There were a few times when Lilly had almost gotten caught by their parents, but she’d managed to snuff the flame, hide the book, and snuggle under the quilt before the door had creaked open. While Miriam enjoyed reading, she wasn’t a voracious reader like her younger sister, but she knew that Zach enjoyed reading for pleasure. Miriam absently wondered if Lilly and Zach enjoyed the same authors.

Miriam’s gaze moved across the hallway to her parents’ room, and tears filled her eyes again. She couldn’t imagine how lonely the room must feel for her father.

Pushing the door back, Miriam stepped into the room as a loud crash sounded, causing her to jump. Glancing beyond the door, she found a stack of papers she’d knocked off the bureau. She knelt on the floor and retrieved the stack, setting it as neatly as possible in its place.

She scanned the floor for missed papers and spotted a shoebox under the bed. Miriam dropped to her knees and yanked the box from under the bed. She opened the lid and gasped at a stack of envelopes addressed to her.

Miriam pulled out an envelope and unfolded the plain stationery inside. Her eyes filled with tears as she read a beautiful letter addressed to her and written in her mother’s handwriting.

Liewe Miriam,