A Solitary Heart (24 page)

long?

It wasn't any wonder that she had believed time and again how much

Devin loved her, for that was the reality, not the number of times he

had shrugged out of so many important events in her life. And she

had grieved and convinced herself that his absence meant that he

didn't care, when he had been protecting her the entire time.

'Why didn't he tell me?' she groaned.

'Sure, and put all that burden on a wee little lassie such as yourself?'

replied Malcolm, shaking his greying head. 'No, Sian. That wouldna

be right.'

There had been no change in Devin's condition when Sian and

Malcolm reached the hospital. No, the doctors did not know whether

he would come out of the coma or not; only time would tell them if

he would survive. All they could do was wait.

Sian took up a vigil at Devin's bedside, and, watching the smooth,

handsome planes of his serene face, she felt as if she were looking at

a stranger. The man she had thought she had known all her life was

gone, vanished in an insubstantial puff of air, and she was terrified to

think she might never come to know the real flesh-and-blood person

before her.

Time meant nothing. Food was put in front of her and taken away

again unnoticed. She dozed in the chair where she sat, and left the

hospital only to wash and change into the new clothes Malcolm went

to buy for her. Any more danger from an outside source, the police

had assured her, was highly unlikely. Malcolm kept vigil with her,

and she was grateful enough for his affection and loyalty, but she had

never felt so lonely in her entire life.

She needed someone to hold her, and reassure her that everything

would somehow work out all right, for her faith and stamina were

draining away bit by bit with the hours that trickled by. She needed

someone to be strong for her, and reliable, someone whose shoulder

she could rest her tired head on. Oh, God, how she needed Matthew,

but he was half a world and an entire lifestyle away, and Sian had

lost all capacity for hope.

At last persuaded that Devin was not about to die in her absence, she

left her father's side on Thursday afternoon to phone the States,

planning the time difference so that she would catch Jane before she

went to work. At the sound of her friend's voice at the other end of

the connection, she nearly broke down and cried.

She explained what had happened, as briefly and concisely as she

could, and when the dreadful words had dried out in her tight throat

Jane exclaimed, 'Oh, Sian! We've been so worried about you! It was

all just so terrible, you vanishing into thin air like that—I've been

beside myself with fear, but I never imagined anything like that could

have happened! Matt went crazy when you disappeared. He came out

to South Bend after he'd called on Tuesday and you weren't here.'

Her heart leaped so violently she felt it as a physical pain, and she

gripped the phone receiver so hard her fingers went numb. 'Is he

there now?'

She knew the answer in the hesitation in her friend's voice, even

more when Jane said very gently, 'No, darling. He's gone back to

Chicago. He said that he had too many responsibilities to put them on

hold until you decided to show up. But I'm sure that as soon as he

knows why you went away the way you did, everything will get

sorted out somehow.. .Sian? Sian, are you there?'

She never heard Jane. Too much had happened to her in the last few

days, and the long unrelenting crisis on her mind and body at last

took its toll. A crushing weight of darkness had descended on to her

shoulders, and the phone receiver slipped out of her nerveless hand to

fall dangling from its cords. Always running away, aren't you?

echoed the accusing ghost in her head. And you weren't there when I

called, even though you promised.

Guess what, kiddo? Looks like you're going to lose this game of

Solitaire, all hands down.

It was a long fall to the ground, without Matthew's arms to catch her.

* * *

ceiling. She was in a large bed and she couldn't remember how she

had come to be there. But she remembered the dream of Paris in the

spring-time, with the rain falling softly on her upturned cheeks, and,

as she heard the shadow of movement on the other side of a half-

open door, she stirred groggily and murmured, 'Matt?'

Quick footsteps sounded outside, and a shadow fell across her body

from the indirect illumination. 'Lassie?' said Malcolm quietly. The

first tentative gladness in her heart withered away as dark reality

slammed home. She turned her face away with a silent sob; of course,

now she remembered. Of course Matt wasn't there.

'What happened?' she croaked out.

'You fainted.' Malcolm came into the room, sat on the edge of the bed

and laid cool, dry fingers against her cheek.

'Good God,' she exclaimed weakly. 'I didn't know I had it in me.'

It was a feeble attempt and Malcolm wasn't smiling. 'The doctors said

it was just exhaustion. I warned you that you were pushing yourself

too hard, but you're just like your da. You wouldna listen.'

'How is he?' Impelled by a renewed sense of urgency, she pushed

herself to her elbows, cursing and amazed at the trembling in her

limbs.

'No change. I'm sorry, lassie—now wait just a bloody minute! You're

not getting out of that bed until you've had a bite to eat! You've slept

round the clock. You need food in your stomach or you'll just faint

again. The hospital will call if there's any news.'

Despite her irritable complaints, Malcolm ordered up a hot

nourishing meal from room service and stood over her until she had

forced down enough food to satisfy him. Only then would he let her

rise, and as she showered and dressed in jeans and a blouse she had

to admit that, if nothing else, at least she felt steadier on her feet.

The heavy cloud cover had broken while she slept, and the Friday

evening sunset was a rainbow kaleidoscope as she and Malcolm left

the hotel. With a wince she fumbled in her purse for her sunglasses,

for her dry, strained eyes could not take the shining brilliance. When

their taxi had dropped them off at the main entrance of the hospital,

Malcolm put a massive arm around her shoulders and led her inside,

his searching gaze scouring the immediate vicinity.

Observing the protective attitude, Sian said drily, 'I thought any more

danger wasn't likely.'

'Aye, well, it doesna hurt to be careful, lassie,' he said, his soothing

tones at complete odds with the tough, capable stance of his body as

he pushed open the door for her to enter. 'Especially with your da

already occupying one hospital bed.'

She stepped inside as she argued, 'But surely since the men who

attacked you have confessed, and Scotland Yard has the casino

owner in custody, there isn't anything more to worry about?'

They were passing through the information desk and main lounge,

which due to the evening visiting hours, was crowded with people.

A man rose to his feet to walk towards them. 'Sian?'

Her head started to turn automatically, in profound surprise and the

first, incredible start of recognition at the familiarity of the deep,

husky voice. But all she saw of him was a blur, for she was shoved

violently against the wall as Malcolm said sharply, 'Look out!'

She reeled into the wall, then recovered with desperate speed.

Malcolm was spinning with lethal grace to thwart the advance of the

intruder. Before conscious thought had time to register, she flung

herself bodily between the two men. 'No, Malcolm!'

Malcolm's fist had already lifted into a swing. Even as he tried to

throw his weight back, he was caught off balance and the blow would

have connected with stunning force into the side of her face, except

that the newcomer thrust out a powerful forearm with lightning speed

to cover her vulnerable, exposed head.

The two men stared at each other over Sian, both pale and shaken, for

had the blow connected it would have broken her jaw. She never

realised how close she had come to injury. She had twisted under the

canopy of their outstretched arms to stare at the newcomer and

whispered unbelievingly, 'Matt?'

His hazel eyes dropped to her, and he looked hard, haggard, and

gloriously real, and then his face softened with indescribable

tenderness as he said huskily, 'Oh, love, I came as soon as I heard.'

She took a sleep-walker's step forward. He reached to gather her

hungrily to him, and the urgent strength of his hold was such

sustenance to her starving soul that she clung to his neck.

She felt as if her heart had leapt right out of her skin. It resided in the

large, solid frame of the man who bowed himself around her, beating

in time with his own. He cupped the back of her head, pulled her face

to him and drove into her mouth with shaking ferocity.

Tears slipped out of the corners of her eyes and streaked their salted

path downwards. Very carefully Matt lifted the dark glasses away

from her face. At the sight of the heavy shadows ringing the delicate

skin around her eyes, her beauty bruised by the events of the past

week, his own gaze darkened with acute pain.

'But how did you know where to find me?' she asked, touching his

lean cheek with wondering fingers, for she still could not quite bring

herself to believe that he was actually with her and not a figment of

her imagination.

'Jane,' he said harshly. 'She called me right after you talked to her.

Remember, you told her which hospital your father was in. I packed

my bag and was at the airport inside of forty-five minutes. Luckily

there was a last-minute cancellation on a British Airways flight,

otherwise I might still be going insane at O'Hare. When I got into

Heathrow this morning, I called around at every hotel in the phone

books, but you weren't anywhere to be found, so I came here to wait.'

'Malcolm booked me in a suite at the Hilton under an assumed name,'

she told him in bemusement.

His expression hardened, and his hold around her waist tightened so

that her breath whistled in her throat.

'Yes,' he said, his voice a grim, graceless scrape of sound. 'Jane said

that your father had been attacked. My God. I've been in seven

different kinds of hell these past few days! First Joshua told me how

you went white as a sheet when some strange man showed up on

your doorstep, and you just meekly went away with him without a

word of explanation. I've been torturing myself ever since with all

kinds of scenarios, each one more wild and outlandish than the last.

The only thing I could think of was that he had some kind of

Svengalian hold on you, and that I would never see you again.'

'It was Malcolm. He's my father's associate,' she said, shocked by the

flash of remembered terror that twisted his expression. 'He never

came to South Bend. Whenever my father visited me, he was alone. I

think he wanted to appear ordinary—as much like everyone else's

parents as possible. When Malcolm showed up without Daddy, I

knew something terrible had happened. All I could think of was that

my father might die before I saw him again.'

'How is he?' he asked quietly.

She bowed her head against him and shuddered. 'In a coma. Malcolm

and Daddy tried their best, but there were three of them—one of his

attackers struck him over the head with an iron pipe.'

'God,' he muttered, running his strong fingers through her hair, as if

to reassure himself that she was whole and unscathed. 'No wonder

that fellow had such a hair- trigger reaction when I walked up to you.'

'Oh, Matt,' she groaned, 'he looks so white, just like a wax image—I

don't know what I would do if he died— he's the only family I've got

-'

'No, oh, no.' He breathed the words, almost crooning, into the shell of

her ear, cradling and soothing her with every giving part of him.

'Sian, no matter what else happens, you'll always have me.'

It took a moment for what he said to sink in. When it did, it was only

what she could have wished for, but Sian's personal demon did not

always listen to the dictates of her heart.

It said bitterly, in her voice, 'Just as I had you over the weekend?'

He stiffened and drew back, his own swift anger flashing in those

predator's eyes, and his hands, sliding to her shoulders, became