Absolutely Unforgivable (25 page)

Jeromy noticed Vin first and stopped walking. He looked down and then saw me. His emerald green eyes widened and his mouth dropped open in surprise. The girl slid down his back to stand on her own two feet.

His brow wrinkled as he stared at me, watching to see what I was going to do. Perhaps he was unsure that he was really seeing me standing there.

I turned to face Vin and Jeromy shouted out, “Stacy, please, it’s not what it looks like!” He ran up to me and grabbed my arm, trying to force me to face him.

“Get your hands off of me!” I shouted. Now everyone was looking but I didn’t care. “Don’t you dare touch me!” My stomach was churning, my head was pounding, and I felt like I might pass out. How could Jeromy do this to me? I can’t believe this. This just can’t be real, it just can’t be. No. This isn’t happening. I tried to push Jeromy back, I didn’t want him touching me.

Looking up at Vin standing next to me, Jeromy slowly dropped his grasp on my arm and quietly said, “Please, Baby, let me explain.”

I turned and pushed my body into Vin. He wrapped his arm around me and escorted me out of the airport. But before walking off he turned to Jeromy and said, “That’s fucked up, man.”

Vin rushed me back to the house and I ran into Billy’s arms crying so hard that he couldn’t understand what I was trying to say. It was hard to form a whole sentence, I was just so upset. “Jeromy … He wasn’t alone.”

Billy hugged me tightly trying to reassure me everything was going to be okay. But it wasn’t going to be okay. I found Jeromy with another woman, a beautiful blonde woman and they had been out of town, together.

“How could he do this to me? Did you know he was out of town with her?”

“No. Of course not. I had no idea any of this was going. Stacy you have to believe if I had known I would have put a stop to it.”

Jeromy followed, only about fifteen minutes behind us. I had run into Billy’s room to get away from Jeromy as he came into the house. Vin followed Jeromy into Billy’s room and, as Jeromy got closer to me, I ran into the bathroom and into Billy’s waiting arms.

“For fuck’s sake, Stacy, let me explain, please,” Jeromy pleaded.

Billy was holding me from behind; Jeromy was standing in front of me. Vin was standing behind him. Jeromy started looking around and saw my personal things all over the sink. He looked at Billy whose hands were around my waist; then Jeromy looked up at my face and then took a step back.

“What’s going on here?” he demanded to know.

I turned my head and looked at my nightgown hanging off of the counter. I started to explain but then stopped myself. I didn’t owe him any explanation. I stepped behind Billy to get as far away from Jeromy as I could.

“Don’t go there man, it’s not what you think,” Vin said in his deep husky voice.

“Fuck you, man. I’m not blind. I can see exactly what is going on here.”

Jeromy puffed his chest out and looked like he was going to hit Billy. I screamed and Vin tried to pull him away as Billy turned around to make sure I was okay. I tried to jump in the middle to stop Jeromy and it was just all a big twisted mess of bodies. Before I knew it, Jeromy’s fist met the corner of my eye and I fell to the floor, crying out in pain. My face stung as it started to swell.

Vin looked down at me, now on the floor in tears, and shouted out, “What the fuck man?” And then he dragged Jeromy out of the room.

Billy dropped to his knees and wrapped his arms around me. I could hear Vin and Jeromy talking in the other room. “What the fuck is going on? Is he fucking her?”

“Jeromy, man, calm down. It’s not what you think. Someone broke into the house while you were gone and attacked Stacy. The cops killed him just outside your bedroom door. We moved her downstairs while you were gone. She’s really freaked out man. She hasn’t been well.”

“Why didn’t someone tell me? I would have come home.”

“She didn’t want you to worry about her while you were away, man. She loves you. She was more worried about you than herself.”

“You gotta let me see her. I need to tell her I’m sorry.”

“I don’t think so, Jeromy. Not right now. You need to give her some space. You cheated on her, man. She’s not just going to get over that right away.”

At this point I began sobbing uncontrollably and couldn’t hear what else was being said. I was hysterical. Billy only wanted to comfort me but I didn’t want him touching me. I wanted to be alone. I wanted to block the entire world out.

Billy went into the living room, leaving me lying on the bathroom floor crying as I asked him to. He told Jeromy it would probably be a good idea if he went to stay with one of the other guys for now, or maybe his mother.

Next he called Trista and had her bring all the girls over to look after me. I appreciated the sentiment but I really didn’t want to see anyone. If I had my way I would have never moved off of the bathroom floor. I would have laid there until I died.
How could Jeromy betray me like that?
I guess I should have suspected something after he lied about Vegas but I just trusted him so blindly.

I don’t know how long I was on that bathroom floor but eventually Darla and Starla came in. Darla gently kicked my leg and I sniped, “What?”

“We are just seeing if you are still alive. If not we want your clothes. Well, not all of them because some of them are like old and gross. But some of them are okay I guess.”

“Leave me alone, Darla. I’m not in the mood for this right now.”

“Whatever. If you want to let some guy treat you like that, I guess that’s your own business.”

In the background I could hear Starla smacking her gum loudly like she and Darla always did. Something about it today though just went through me. I was so annoyed by her incessant chewing I sat up and said, “Would you please just leave me alone!”

I don’t know if it was the anger I built up over Darla and Starla annoying me or if it was the process of finally sitting up or maybe some strange combination of the two but I suddenly felt much better. I saw a smile come across Darla’s face as if she knew that by making me get up, even if it was to yell at her, I would be okay. And she was right.

I was still horribly upset about Jeromy cheating on me, but I had taken the first step. I picked myself off of the floor and walked into the living room where Mindy and Bree bounced up and down in joy at seeing me up and walking around.

“Do you know where Billy is?” I wanted to apologize to him for bringing all this drama into his house. He’s been such a sweet guy; he really didn’t deserve all of that.

Rocco said he was in the gym working out so I asked him if he would go into my room and grab my big suitcase. He did as I asked and brought it to me. I went into Billy’s closet and started packing my clothes. I didn’t really have enough room in that suitcase to fit everything but I packed what I could.

As I was just about finished Billy came into the room, slamming his bedroom door behind him. “What are you doing?”

“I’m packing.”

“I can see that, but why?”

“Because, Billy. I obviously can’t stay here anymore. So I’m going back home.”

My heart surged as Billy rushed up to me and grabbed my wrist, forcing it off of my suitcase. “This is your home.”

“You know what I mean,” I said, exasperated.

“No, I don’t.”

I sighed. “I mean I’m going back home to Oklahoma, to stay with my parents until I figure out what I am going to do with my life.”

Billy, who had finally released his tight grasp on my arm, gently put his hand on top of mine. “You don’t have to go. I don’t want you to go. I need you.”

I stopped for a moment and looked at him as he said that. His beautiful blue eyes were horribly sad. I tried to pull my hand away but he tightened his grip and then pulled my body into his.

“I can’t let you go,” he said softly as he ran his finger gently over my lips. I felt electricity course through my body.

I bit my bottom lip and then he pulled me into him tightly and gently started kissing me. His soft lips felt so good against mine. We both began to breathe heavily and he pressed his forehead to mine, sitting there for just a moment as if he was trying to control his heart rate.

His eyes narrowing, he lowered his head and took possession of my lips with a passionate kiss that made my head spin. I let out a soft moan as his lips pressed against mine. My body was burning with desire. He pulled back and brushed his thumb over my lips. His eyes were so warm and tender. The way he looked at me made my knees wobble and my breath quicken.

I started to say no, but I couldn’t force that word out of my mouth. I didn’t really want him to stop. As wrong as it was, I wanted him to throw me down and take me right here and now. My hand worked its way up his arm and he indistinctly flexed his muscles. His arms were so strong, so firm, and so damn sexy.

Still my mind raced with thoughts of Jeromy. But then again Jeromy did cheat on me. Clearly we were over, so this really isn’t cheating.
Is it?
My mind wanted to pull away, but my body wouldn’t move. I was in Billy’s arms, exactly where I wanted to be. If it was wrong, I truly didn’t care. All I wanted was Billy and I was tired of saying no. My body was consumed by desire and I had to have him.

“Kiss me again,” I purred and within an instant his lips were back on mine.

I ached for his body, his sensual touch. I wanted him inside of me so desperately. All of the troubles of earlier that day were no longer on my mind. The only thing I could focus on is how good it felt to be in Billy’s arms.

There were no regrets, no second-guessing. I was confident about what I wanted and that was Billy, deep inside of me. He ran his hands down my thighs and then growled.

I had pretended our flirting was nothing more than innocent banter between friends. But it had never been innocent. I wanted him and he wanted me and it had been that way for a long time now.

He pushed me down on the bed and my thoughts scattered. I pulled his shirt over his head and ran my hands over his firm chest. I moaned in pleasure as he put his hands on my stomach and started to remove my shirt.

I licked my lips with anticipation as Billy ran his hands down my thighs and then back up to my hips. He pushed my skirt up to my waist and then ran his fingers under the waistband as he gently pulled it down my now quivering legs.

There was a fire burning inside of me that only he could quench. “I need you, Billy, right now.”

He stood up and pulled off his pants. His beautiful naked body now stood before me. My eyes immediately darted to the bulge that had been growing in his pants. I didn’t realize how well-endowed he was before. I had seen him naked but it was only for a second and not fully erect.

My lust for him took over my every thought and body movement. I crawled to him and sat up on my knees and pulled him into me as we kissed -- a deep and mind-blowing kiss that took my breath away. It was if we had connected on a level that truly transcended our physical bodies. My breath grew heavy, my vision clouded and my entire body began to shake. He felt so good.

His smile deepened, and he leaned in closer. Then he pushed me back on the bed and climbed on top of me. I closed my eyes and let out a soft moan as he rocked himself gently against my body.

After, I looked up at him. His face contorted with pleasure and he said, “You are incredible.” He kissed me passionately and then laid down beside me, holding me tightly as I fell asleep in the safety of his loving arms.

When I woke up for some reason I started to think about all of the women Billy had been with before and winced at the thought. I can’t believe we had unprotected sex. I had never done that before in my entire life. What was I thinking?

“What’s wrong? Do you regret what happened?” I could feel his body tense up when he asked me that.

“Oh no, no way. Not at all. How could you think something like that?”

“You just have this look on your face like you are unhappy about something.”

“Not unhappy. Just worried I guess. You’ve been with a lot of girls and we were so caught up in the moment, we didn’t exactly play it safe.”

“No Stacy, I never.”

“Oh my God. Don’t try that with me. I know I’m not your first. I’ve seen you with other girls before!”

“No, I mean I have never been with anyone else without protection before you.”

“Seriously? Never in your entire life?”

“I’m serious. And you?”

“Never. I have always been safe. I have only been with one other guy besides Jeromy but still always, always, always. I’m so safe I am even on the pill and still use condoms.”

Billy laughed but I was serious. I had never been so irresponsible before. Still, it worried me. But then again what’s done is done. I can’t exactly go back and change the past so no point in obsessing about it. We’ll just have to be more careful in the future.

Billy kissed me on the forehead and headed to the bathroom to get ready for the show. I looked into the mirror at my black eye and told him that I didn’t think it was a good idea that I went with him tonight.

He pulled me in to give me a hug and sighed. “Okay. I want you to stay near Vin tonight, though. Promise me you won’t be out of his sight for even a moment.” I hated how overprotective everyone was sometimes, but considering all that had gone on lately I knew it was probably for the best.