Always with You (WIth You Trilogy) (23 page)

He surprised me again by
pulling me into him and holding me. Despite the fact that I was naked, his hands didn’t stray to my rear end, or tangle in my hair like they might usually have done. He just held me.

I knew touching me was important to Jason. Sometimes it felt like he had to do it to convince himself I was really with him. I shuffled slightly, rubbing my body against his as I found a comfy position with as much of our skin touching as possible. My arms
looped around his shoulders and I sighed happily in his embrace.

“Never thought I’d say this,” Jason whispered. “But I’m so glad your brother is here.”

I chuckled gently. “Ian? Yeah, me too. I hate it when he goes away.” This felt like the weirdest conversation ever to be having naked.

“That too. B
ut I meant that I’ve been so worried about you the past few months and him being back means I don’t have to worry quite so much. Losing you is the scariest thing in the world to me. Not being able to hold you in my arms like this would kill me.”

“There’s the soppy romantic I know and love,” I grinned, leaning back to cup his face in my hands and press kisses to his forehead. “You’re my everyt
hing, Jason. You know that, right?”

He nodded almost shyly and I pulled my face closer to his to let my kiss tell him how much he meant to me.
He smiled almost shyly as I pulled away bit it was soon replaced by his cheeky grin as he reached behind himself to retrieve whatever it was he’d taken from the bathroom.

“What is it?” I asked, settling my palms on his stomach and enjoying the warmth of his skin against mine.

He held the bottle up for me to see. It was a fairly snazzy looking bottle of massage oil with the hotel name on the top.

“Jason, you have to pay for that stuff,” I frowned. “And it looks expensive.”

Jason just laughed. “Blame your brothers for picking a posh hotel.”

I maintained my frown and was only slightly distracted by the way his stomach clenched when he laughed.

“When are you going to learn that you’re worth every penny, Jamie?” He grinned, pouring some of the most likely ridiculously over-priced liquid into his hands and rubbing it to warm it up.

I grumbled in response but soon quietened as he began rubbing the vanilla scented liquid into my arms, wrists and, hands.

“Oh, that’s so nice,” I cooed, relaxing in his lap.

Jason winked and continued working any and all tension from my limbs.

“Not that I’m complaining,” I started hesitantly as Jason moved onto my shoulders. “But I thought you were going to spank me.” I blushed the compulsory blush but met his eyes which lit up in amusement.

“I decided to let you off,” he grinned. “Tonight I want to make sure you know how special you are to me.”

I smiled bashfully and leaned forwards slightly so I could kiss him on the lips. I really wanted to massage him as well but he flat out denied me. I pouted but it seemed important to him so I let him have his way. I’d just make sure he let me rub him all over another time.
Fair is fair.

By the time Jason had finished making tender love to me, I was in a state of complete and utter contentment. Emotionally, physically, and sexually. If this was a sign of things to come now that the waters were settling, I was going to be a very happy girl.

Tuesday, 8th October 2013

We were woken up at five, which was early even for my brothers. Matt had to drive back in time for work and Ian wanted to make sure we all had breakfast together.

“See, it looks good on her,” Ian laughed upon seeing that Grace was wearing her new onesie.

“She’s my daughter, everything looks good on her,” Karl scoffed.

“I got
it in four different sizes for when she grows out of it,” Ian grinned, knocking the smirk off Karl’s face somewhat.

“Should have got her the ‘who dares wins’ one,” Xander grunted between mouthfuls of scrambled eggs.
That was the motto for the SAS.

“Mm,” Ian mumbled his agreement through his toast.

I just grinned, happy to have everyone back together and normal. Well, not quite normal. Something was different. There was less tension in the air, less fear of saying the wrong thing and upsetting someone older than you. Maybe that was just me, but Jake and Craig seemed a little more at ease as well.

They were the two that had spoken out the most when I’d gotten in trouble,
particularly recently. Jake seemed less worried about pissing someone off as well, especially since Jason and Craig had given the twins a “talking to”. I wasn’t sure exactly what that meant but it seemed to have worked.

When Matt had gone, the others all started filing down to reception ready to head home
. Xander loitered in the foyer with Ian. It was going to be weird not having him around. I hadn’t really wanted him there in the first place but he had done his fair share in making me feel safe and I’d grown used to the smell of toxically strong coffee every morning.

“Jelly, Jason,” Ian beckoned us over after the twins and Craig had left.

“’Sup?” Jason replied, his arm around my shoulder.

“I was thinking I’d come spend a couple of days with you in
Leeds,” he said.

It was so typically Ian to not phrase it as a question that I just smiled.

“I’d like that,” I nodded with a grin and I meant it. I’d missed him like mad.

“Fine by me,” Jason said, granting Ian the permission that he never asked for which seemed to amuse Xander.

When we’d made our goodbyes to the rest of the family, including an extra long cuddle with Grace, Xander led the way to his Audi Q8. I wasn’t sure why Xander was coming with us since he lived in Manchester but since he’d driven us, I figured he was going to take us back.

Ian grinned when he saw
the car and held his hands out for the keys. “I’ll drive.”

Xander remained still and simply raised one
eyebrow. “One word: Kandahar.”

“That wasn’t my fault,” Ian replied quickly.

It was just plain weird seeing Ian on the defensive.

“You totalled it,” Xander smirked.

“Well excuse me for trying not to get shot… again,” Ian grumbled, conceding victory and taking the passenger seat.

I
couldn’t actually remember ever seeing Ian sat anywhere other than the driver’s seat. I’d definitely never seen him give up so easily. The friendship he had with Xander was obviously important to him, both because of shared experiences and mutual trust.

The two of them chatted away in what seemed like code in the front seat. I didn’t recognise any of the names or places they mentioned so I tuned them out
. Jason pulled my feet up into his lap and removed my shoes. It meant I had to shift slightly in my seat and lean against the car door but when he started massaging my feet, I forgot all about that.
God, I love this man
. He rubbed firm but pleasant circles on the arches of my feet and I almost moaned in pleasure.

He smiled coyly at me and I met his love filled gaze. There really was nothing I wouldn’t do for
this man. I had him to thank for how perfect everything in my life felt at that moment. I truly believed I would have let my brothers overwhelm me if I hadn’t met him, if he hadn’t given me faith in myself.

“What you thinking about?” Jason grinned at me, one hand moving up my jeans to caress my calf.

“Just how much I love you,” I smiled back. I loved the way his green-blue eyes sparkled with happiness every time I said those three words.

“Jesus Christ,” Ian grumbled. “You had to put up with this shit for three months solid?”

“Yup,” Xander nodded, smirking slightly as his laughing eyes met mine in the rear-view mirror.

“
Should get a fucking bonus,” Ian shook his head with a chuckle.

Xander just chuckled and I levelled a glare at the back of Ian’s head. He must have sensed it with his spidey senses because he turned his head to wink at me.

The happy banter continued all the way back to Leeds and Xander almost managed a full smile a couple of times. We parked a little way down the street from Jason’s flat to pick up the stuff we’d left there when Xander sprang the visit on us.

Jason kissed me with a cheeky grin once he helped me out of the car. I suspected he was enjoying testing Ian and proving to both me and himself that my brothers were collectively getting better at
relinquishing their tight grips.

Don’t get me wrong, I loved having big brothers.
I loved knowing that they’d always be there for me if I needed them: the jelly sandwiches, the forehead kisses, the nightmare induced movie nights, and all that they had done for me. But I didn’t love the constant coddling, the fear, or the need to control me. With those things gone, I had no complaints.

There was no point holding the past against them; for every time they’d hurt me – mentally or physically – there were at least ten occasions where they’d sacrificed something for me or looked after me when I needed it most and for that I would always be grateful.

“Fuck’s sake, Jelly. You think you two could dial it back a bit. It wasn’t that long ago you were holding my hand to cross the street and now you’re getting your face eaten in the middle of it,” Ian moaned.

“
Sorry,” I smiled fondly. He’d never be able to pull back the big brother syndrome.

“No you’re not,” Ian sighed. “But that’s okay, at least you’re happy.”

“I am.” And I was.

Xander le
d the way up the pathway to the front door of Jason and Josh’s flat but stopped dead in his tracks and held his hand up for us to stop.

I frowned up at him before
noticing that all three of the guys had stiffened. The door to the flat stood ajar with splinters of wood hanging from the frame and littering the ground.

In identical movements, Ian and Xander pulled handguns from inside their jackets. My brain shut down for a few secon
ds. I wasn’t stupid, I knew Ian used firearms in his line of work but his work life was so separate from his private life that I never expected him to be carrying. That, and the fact that weapons licenses were almost impossible to get in the UK, had my brain short-circuiting.

Ian motioned with some quick hand gestures for Xander to go in first before turning to face Jason.

“Stay with Jelly,” he mouthed before turning back to nod at Xander that he had his back.

“Ian, no!” I whispered as loudly as I dared.
They shouldn’t be going in, they should be calling the police like normal people do.

Ian brought his finger to his lips and shot a scowl in my direction before signing that everything would be okay and continuing into the flat.

My body trembled in fear as I watched my big brother disappear into danger unknown. Could the world be that cruel? He’d only just come back from God knows what hell hole, risking his life for home and country, only to jump right back into danger on his return.

I knew my brother. I knew his need to protect people was part of who he was but the fact that he was doing so under
the current circumstances made me want to scream with anger and fear.

The warm safety of Jason’s embrace enveloped me and absorbed some of the shakes that rocked through me. Each second dragged as I strained my ears to pick up any sounds to indicate what was happening behind the damaged door.

I barely blinked as I stared at it, waiting for a sign that Ian and Xander were okay. I didn’t have to wait too long because Xander burst past me, pushing us to the side as he vaulted over the small brick wall separating the building from its terraced partner. He proceeded to climb over what must have been a six foot chain link fence with feline agility before continuing his sprint down the alleyway that led to the street that Jason’s flat backed onto.

Where is he going?
I wondered before drawing my attention back to the flat as Ian’s voice called out from within.

“All clear.”

Jason took my by the hand, squeezing reassuringly despite the slight frown I was sure he was trying to hide from me. In my haste to consider my brother’s safety, I’d neglected to consider how Jason must have been feeling to find his home invaded by culprits unknown. I felt worse when we met Ian in the hallway leading to the bedrooms, squatting over an unconscious Josh.

“Oh my God, is he okay?” I blurted, falling to my knees at Josh’s side.

“He’s unconscious,” Ian answered curtly, motioning to two small burn marks on the back of his neck. “We’ll call for an ambulance-”

He was interrupted by a groan from Josh as he groggily shook himself back to conscious
ness. An uncomfortable tension released in my stomach at the sound of the “What the fuck?” groan which accompanied his return to the living.

Xander ret
urned shortly with the stoniest face I’d ever seen him wearing. He shook his head in exasperation as Ian looked at him expectantly. He’d apparently taken chase after they’d seen a person in a black hoody making a run for it through they backyard after having smashed his way through the bathroom window.

“Jumped in a plateless car,” Xander growled. “Red Vauxhall Vectra. I’d guess 1995.”

Josh and Jason’s rooms had both been completely trashed. Jason’s seemed to have taken a worse hit. His drawers had been tossed and clothes lay strewn across the floor. The most tragic thing in the room was the frame that held a picture of Jason and Ben with their arms around each other after a particularly muddy football game during their teenage years. It had been removed from pride of place in the middle of Jason’s desk and lay on the floor with the glass smashed to pieces.

Panic took hold of my gut as I saw the empty place usually occupied by Jason’s laptop but then I remembered he’d left it at my flat. That laptop contained everything for his doctoral
thesis. I was sure he had back-ups but I bet it would have caused major problems for him and I knew how much his degree meant to him.
My renewable energy geek
. Despite the chaos, I smiled inwardly at the memory of my Granddad calling Jason a geek.

Th
e police arrived not long after, whilst I was still fussing over Josh, much to his embarrassment. He was fine aside from being a little pissed off that somebody had gotten the jump on him. He’d been at his girlfriend’s house and nipped back to pick up his guitar. He’d noticed the door was broken but hadn’t stopped to consider the possibility that the thief might still have been in the building.

The two officers who’d arrived both straightened somewhat when Ian flashed some sort of I.D. from his wallet. I figured it was something related to his job, the nuances of which I still hadn’t come to terms with. However, seeing him in action with his weapon out had made it seem much more real and much more terrifying.

“I’d put him at 5’ 10”. 180lbs. He was wearing navy Adidas tracksuit bottoms, a black hoody with no obvious markings, and white Puma trainers. He had leather gloves on,” Ian informed the officers as they politely bombarded him, Xander, and Josh with questions.

Josh hadn’t seen anything and neither of the gun-wielding, macho men had been able to see
much apart from the back of the guys body with his hood up.

Xander’s description of the car was as detailed as Ian’s and I couldn’t help but be impressed with how much they’d noticed in such a small amount of time. If I closed my eyes, I’d have to make a considerable effort just to remember what colour clothes I was wearing.

“Lights on the back right were smashed up. Passenger side door had been broken into, didn’t shut properly. Manual transmission. No plates.” Xander finished his summary.

As far as Josh and Jason could tell, nothing had actually been taken. Josh probably disturbed the guy initially and then Ian and Xander interrupted before any real damage could be done. Considering the amount of tech the two of them had between them – from games consoles
, to electric guitars – they both figured they’d been pretty lucky. Hyde Park was a predominantly student, low-income area. Burglary was not at all uncommon and they had good home insurance so the two of them actually seemed pretty happy about the outcome, the damage to Josh’s neck and ego aside.

The moment the police left, the fury I’d been tamping down burst from me. I whirled around and threw myself at Ian, smashing my fists against his chest in a rain of angry blows. I made sure a few of them caught Xander as well.
Idiots
. I couldn’t believe what they’d done.