Anal Pleasure and Health: A Guide for Men, Women and Couples (15 page)
Read Anal Pleasure and Health: A Guide for Men, Women and Couples Online
Authors: Jack Morin Ph.d.
Fiber preparations such as psyllium (Metamucil° or cheaper generics) can also be taken as a supplement. Psyllium is made from the husks of seeds and is, therefore, all natural. Avoid the type that includes a chemical laxative; these should be used sparingly, if at all. In the past, psyllium fiber had to be mixed with liquid to form a rather unappealing drink. Not you can buy it in capsules, which are much easier to take, unless you have a swallowing problem. Always take these capsules with a full glass of water.
The ease with which you have bowel movements and the pleasure you receive from anal stimuli will be greatly enhanced if you learn how to voluntarily relax the internal sphincter. How can a person learn voluntary control over an "involuntary" body process? That such control is possible at all still isn't widely recognized in the West. In the East, practitioners of healing methods such as yoga and acupuncture have focused on this possibility for centuries. In the West, the turning point was the development of biofeedback, which involves the use of mechanical or electronic devices to provide a person with visual or auditory information about what the body is doing. Put simply, it has been found that if a person can get clear, immediate feedback (such as a changing tone or flashing light) about some "involuntary" body function (such as blood pressure, brain waves, or skin temperature), before long he or she will be able noticeably to influence that function just by paying attention to it.
The key to voluntary control of the sphincter muscles, particularly the internal one, is a steady, accurate stream of information about what the muscle is doing. Happily, no electronic instruments are needed to provide this information. Your body is already equipped with a supersensitive biofeedback device that you can use at any moment-your finger. By inserting a finger into your anal canal, locating the two sphincters, and paying attention to the information your finger provides, you can learn to relax the muscles at will.
Before you begin to explore inside your anus, you should know that your anal canal and rectum normally contain little if any feces. Your rectum and anal canal are merely passageways for feces which, during a bowel movement, are moved by muscular waves called peristalsis out of the colon and into the rectum and out through the anal canal. Feces are not normally stored in the rectum for long periods of time. However, those who have learned to ignore the rectal reflex or whose feces are not well-formed are much more likely to encounter feces in the lower rectum, a situation that can be remedied by changes in diet and toilet habits.
Bathing is usually adequate for cleaning this area, especially when you learn to feel comfortable putting your finger in your anus as part of bathing or showering. If, however, you are concerned about cleanliness, you might want to give yourself an anal douche.
ANAL DOUCHING (ENEMAS)
ANAL DOUCHING is the process of introducing warm water into the anal canal and lower rectum, holding that liquid inside for a couple of minutes, and then releasing it. An enema involves a similar process, with two big differences. First, the goal is having a bowel movement rather than cleanliness. And second, enemas typically include various stimulating (and irritating) chemicals. There was a time when some children were forced to submit to regular enemas as "treatment"-more like punishment-for constipation or for general health. That practice has mostly stopped, but way too many people still rely on chemical enemas for their bowel movements. Not only can this be habit-forming, but using them too often can ruin a person's ability to have bowel movements naturally.
While it's smart to stay away from chemical enemas, plain water douching solely for the purpose of cleaning the anus and lower rectum is harmless, with no negative side-effects if done sensibly. Many people report that the feeling of cleanliness that results helps them relax because they're no longer concerned about encountering feces during anal play.
There are four basic means of anal douching. First, you can buy a disposable Fleet® enema at the drugstore. It comes in a plastic bottle with a flexible, lubricated tip for insertion into the anus. Just empty out the unnecessary chemical solution and fill the container with warm water. It can be used over and over again as long as the tip is thoroughly washed after each use. Second, you can get a rubber bulb-shaped "ear syringe" sold in drugstores for gently cleaning the inner ear, and use it the same way. Both of these methods will introduce a relatively small amount of water into the lower rectum. For many people, though, it's just the right amount. Some people use a plastic turkey baster with a rubber bulb, but these are made of hard plastic, often with rough edges and seams, so I don't recommend them.
Some people enjoy the process of anal douching, whereas others merely tolerate it as a practical means to an end. Still others have a visceral negative reaction to douching. In some instances, the douche is a reminder of invasive and traumatic childhood enemas. Sometimes the sensations simply aren't pleasant, no matter what the reason. The bottom line: If anal douching makes you uncomfortable, don't do it. Sometimes, however, taking it slow and easy as you get used to the new sensations works wonders. Simply inserting your finger in your anus while showering can provide perfectly adequate cleanliness, especially when preparing for finger stimulation.
LUBRICATION
THE INNER PORTION of the anal canal produces mucus to keep the tissues moist and protected, but anal mucus is not the same as the plentiful lubrication secreted by the vagina. For this reason, extra lubrication should always be applied when you insert your finger or anything else into the anus.
Talking to anal enthusiasts about lubricants is like talking to wine connoisseurs about wine-everybody has a different opinion about which is best. You have to decide this for yourself. A few guiding principles, however, are helpful. First, use a lubricant with as few chemical additives as possible. Your anus and rectum are not as accustomed to a steady assault of harsh chemicals as the rest of your body. Scents, colors and emollients are all chemicals that can irritate anal tissues. Second, lotions and creams don't lubricate well because they're quickly absorbed. Water-soluble lubricants are good because they clean up easily. For this reason, they are the most convenient for anal exploring with your finger. And they're essential if you'll be using a latex condom, because oils or oil-based lubes destroy latex.
If you decide to try more prolonged anal stimulation, then greasy or oily lubricants have an advantage because they last longer. Vegetable shortening, safflower or peanut oil, petroleum jelly, or virtually any of the newer commercial erotic lubricants are all fine. It's a matter of personal preference. Water-soluble lubricants should probably be the only ones used in the vagina (if extra lubrication is desired or needed), because the vagina is a cul-de-sac from which heavy lubricants like petroleum jelly are difficult to wash out.
EXPERIENCE
BEGIN WITH bathing and anal looking and touching, which I hope you have tried many times by now. In preparation, make sure your fingernails are trimmed and filed smooth. Apply a small amount of lubricant to your anal opening and to whichever finger seems most comfortable.
Inhale deeply, contract your anal muscles, and gently press your finger against your anus. As you exhale, let your anal muscles relax until your finger slides easily into your anal canal. Use no more than a gentle pressure. Go in only as far as feels completely comfortable-a quarter of an inch at first is fine. If you feel discomfort or pain, it means that you are pushing too hard and should back off on the pressure.
When your finger is as far into your anus as it will comfortably go, stop there and let your anal muscles get used to the presence of your finger. Your anus will relax even more as it discovers this is not an invasion, but a friendly expedition. Be sure to keep breathing deeply and slowly. Feel the relaxation, but don't push your finger in any further. Stay at this comfort point for as long as you want and then slide your finger out slowly and sensuously.
Each time you repeat this exercise you'll discover that your finger comfortably goes in a little farther. At each step, spend a few minutes moving your finger at a leisurely pace in a circular motion. Stop before you feel uncomfortable or bored.
Experiment with moving your finger in and out, back and forth, and around in a circle. Try using your fingertip to gently press at different points around your anal canal. This helps to stretch your anal muscles a bit, just as you might stretch other muscles throughout your body. Never push beyond your personal comfort zone. Do only what your anus will accept without protest. If you realize you've gone too far or too fast, back off a little. But don't pull out completely-and definitely avoid a rapid pull-out. Jerky movements tend to make your anus more tense.
When you can move your finger around freely, slowly pull it out so that only the tip is inside your anal canal (about one half to three quarters of an inch). Gently press against the walls of the anal canal. You'll be able to distinguish your external and internal sphincter muscles as two separate rings with a small space between them (less than a quarter of an inch). The external one will probably feel more relaxed than the internal one. Notice how you can tense and relax the external sphincter at will, while the internal one seems to have a mind of its own.
Also notice that the internal sphincter frequently changes spontaneously, tensing up a little and then relaxing a little. The most beneficial thing you can do is simply pay attention to your observations, though a simple process known as mindfulness. Here's how it works: When your sphincter muscles relaxes a little, say or think to yourself, "relax, relax" or "I'm letting go." When they starts to tense up again, say, "tense, tense" or "I'm tensing up." You're just noticing and describing for yourself what's happening, without trying to control it at all. Gradually-there's no hurry-you'll find that saying or thinking "relax" or "letting go" actually affects your sphincters. But if they don't respond to your relaxed thoughts and tense up anyway, don't fight it; just repeat, "getting tense." You are building a vital link between your thoughts and intentions and your anal and pelvic muscles (remember, they're interconnected). The stronger this linkage becomes, the greater will be your capacity to release when you want to.
