Andrea and the 5-Day Challenge (23 page)

“Luke…”

Luke raised his hand to me as we stopped at a red light. “It's cool. I understand. You liked being friends, but you're just not into me as more than that. I get it.” His voice raised an octave on the last few words. They came out a bit harsh, too.

“No, you so don't get it. That's not it at all.”

“So, what is it? Because I've been straining to understand what happened between us and to somehow find a way not be mad at you.”

“You aren't mad at me?”

“No,” he yelled. “At least, I'm trying not to be.”

“Then why are we shouting at each other?”

“I don't know.” This time a minuscule smile cracked on his face, and his voice sounded calmer. “I just want to know why, Andrea.”

I opened my mouth to divulge everything, but then I found that I couldn't do it. Wasn't it better to just leave it vague? It wouldn't change anything. He'd just know what a loser I was.

“It's just with everything going on—the recital and everything—I just don't think it's a good idea. I'm sorry, but it's not like you won't have an even better time with Steph.” I pressed my lips together to stop myself from sticking my foot into it again. What was I doing? Accusing Luke of things I didn't even know for sure instead of actually explaining my own stupid blunders. Sabotaging myself, that's what I'd done.

Luke looked mad—like he had back by the drinking fountain. I could read the anger even from his profile by the way his jaw tightened and his mouth curved downward. Could he really want nothing to do with Steph? Or was it because of Josh? Didn't he know me well enough to know that I hadn't encouraged him and that I would never want any attention from that jerk?

Luke stopped the car on the side of the road.

“What are you doing?” I asked, with an odd creeping sensation moving up my neck. I was in for it now.

He twisted his head toward me. “I'm not going with Stephanie to homecoming.”

“Then why was she with you almost the whole night?”

“It's not like I can control where she goes. What was I supposed to say? It's not like I have a girlfriend.” Oh, yeah, he was heated, and yet the way his eyes swirled around all angrily totally mesmerized me.

I crossed my arms so I'd appear mad, and to ensure that I wouldn't look into his fascinating eyes again. “Well, you
should
take Steph. She's popular and always a hoot to be around. I mean, personality galore.” It was like I couldn't control the words coming out of my mouth.

Luke made a huffing sound, and then turned the car back on. We both remained quiet the next couple minutes, and then I realized he'd passed the entrance to my subdivision.

“Where are you taking me?” It's like I imagined he was kidnapping me. He wasn't. I hoped.

“My house.”

“Your house?” I literally gulped loud enough to hear it inside my head.

“I have your Geometry homework. I thought you might need it. I forgot to leave it at your house this afternoon.”

“Oh, well, thanks.”

“No problem.” He didn't look at me, and he still sounded way mad.

A couple minutes later, we arrived at his house. This was a new subdivision that they'd built just last year. Even in the dark, I could see that Luke's house was cute—small, but cute—with latticework around the windows, flowers growing by the front door and matching bushes planted in a row along the flowerbed. That's when I saw them—the daisies. The same daisies Luke had been giving me this week. They were planted in between the bushes by the front door. A guilty pang reverberated in my heart.

“My Mom's home, but she won't care if we say we're studying.”

“Great, because the last thing we need is more anger around here.”

He didn't even offer me a glance at that comment.

I noticed his shoulders move a smidge as if he had laughed silently. I could only wish. I knew if I could get Luke to laugh at me again then things might fall back into some semblance of the way it was with us before everything got so complicated.

 

 

 

 

19

 

Luke unlocked the door and held it open for me.

I stepped inside onto a nice, light-colored wood floor. “For Sale” signs were stacked together in the corner next to the door, and a navy blue blazer with a realtor name tag for “Karen Ryan” hung over a closet doorknob. Moving boxes were set here or there around the room, but it was fairly neat and orderly.

I entered through an arched doorway leading into the living room. On the fireplace mantelpiece were picture frames. Among them, I noticed one of a teenage girl in a cheerleading uniform and another one of a ten-year-old Luke and the same girl with an arm around each other while holding melting popsicles. This had to be the elusive sister.

Luke's mom sat on a cream-colored couch, eating some ice cream and watching a movie. “Luke, you're home early.” She set the bowl down on the table next to a coffee mug and came to her feet. Mrs. Ryan was tall, with nice high cheekbones and the same dark eyes as her son's. Dressed in a green cardigan sweater and dark gray yoga pants, she didn't seem frumpy, but actually pretty well put together. She smiled at us, but there were tears in her eyes. She wiped a hand under each one. “You know this movie always makes me cry.”

She came around the couch to where Luke and I were standing. “I've wanted to meet Luke's friends from school. It's nice to finally meet you, Andrea.” She shook my hand, and then looked at Luke as if confirming that I was indeed Andrea.

Luke shifted from one foot to the other and cleared his throat. Did this mean that he'd spoken about me to his mother?

“Nice to meet you, Mrs. Ryan.”

“Oh, please, call me Karen. Hey, do you guys want some ice cream? I just bought some tonight. Lots of fudge and nuts and all that yummy stuff.”

“No, thanks, Mom. We're going to study for the Geometry test.”

“Oh, of course. Teenagers studying on a Friday night. That's not odd or anything.” She sat back on the couch and flipped her movie back on. “Well, I make no promises about saving you any ice cream.”

“Noted,” Luke replied with a humorous lilt in his voice. He led me to his room and continued on to a desk with a computer on top. There were a couple boxes stacked around the room and nothing but one poster hanging on the sterile white walls.

“Your mom seems nice.”

“She is. Sorry about her crying. She does that a lot lately.”

That's when I remembered the whole middle of a divorce thing that their family was going through, and I felt like an even bigger jerk than before. “Oh, well, that movie is really sad. I watched it once with my mom and by the end it was a tear-fest.”

“Seems like cruel and unusually punishment to me.”

“Yeah, I know.” Although, I also knew that crying at a good, sad movie could be quite cathartic, but I wasn't sure if Luke had been made aware of that fact, being a boy and all.

I walked over to the poster on the wall. “So, this is Sandy Koufax.”

“That's him.” Luke didn't add anything else.

I knew under normal circumstances he would have told me a whole lot more about his favorite baseball player. It only reminded me of the strain between us. “I guess you're still moving in.”

“Uh, yeah.” He moved over and shut the bedroom door.

I felt a little nervous with the door shut. Why had he shut it? What did he plan to do to me? “It's OK for me to be in your room, isn't it?” It seemed like a stupid question since his mother didn't seem all that worried about us, but still I wondered. I mean, I'm not allowed to have boys in my room.

“You know, it's never really come up. I've never had a girl in my room before.” He sounded angry again, as if my question reminded him of the whole stupid situation which had brought us to fight earlier. I guess it's not really a fight but definitely tension.

“Well, that's good to know.” It was a lame response, but I didn't know what else to say.

“What part—that it's OK for you to be here or that I've never had a girl in my room?” He stepped close.

Even though I'm unusually tall for a female, he towered over me and I felt really small. I didn't like arguing with him. I hated confrontation and tension.

The doorbell rang in the front of the house, but Luke didn't seem all that interested in who it might be. Maybe his mom ordered pizza.

“You know, Luke, why don't you just give me that assignment and I'll go. You don't even have to drive me home because I've lived here all my life and I can get there on my own.”

“Don't be like that.” His voice softened.

“I'm not being like anything.” My eyes started to mist over. “I…” But I couldn't say anything else.

“Andrea, please, I'm sorry...” He didn't finish what he was going to say (and I think it would have been good because his eyes were doing that emotional swirling thing), but it was then that we heard raised voices.

Luke's mouth formed a square line and his expression switched from apologetic to worried in a flash. He whipped the door open and left me standing there.

What could I do but walk to the doorway and see what the commotion was all about?

It turned out to be his parents having a fight. His mother's tears had multiplied, but I don't think it had anything to do with the movie.

“You should have told me, Karen,” Luke's father said in a cold tone. At least, I assumed it to be his father. His dark brows inched downward on his forehead, and he stepped closer to Mrs. Ryan.

She, in turn, inched backwards with anxiety etched into her face. “Would it have mattered?” Her voice wavered like she really felt frightened of him.

“I'm still Luke's father. I have a right to know where he's going to college. I am the one who'll have to pay the tuition bills. We agreed Luke was going to UCLA.”

“No, Jim, you agreed. Luke should have a choice. It is his future, after all.”

Mr. Ryan didn't seem to like that comment—not one little bit. His cheeks reddened, and he got right in Mrs. Ryan's face. “Don't even try to…”

“Dad!” Luke yelled out. “Back off. Don't blame Mom. It's what I wanted. If you're going to get mad at anyone it should be me.” He stood next to his mother like a shield.

Watching this scene play out absolutely shocked me. I had no idea it was this bad for Luke. I mean, I know divorce can be bad. I've seen movies and heard about it from other kids, but it's different having it play out before your eyes.

Luke maneuvered his parents to sit on opposite couches facing each other. The anger dropped to a lower level, and they actually started talking.

I was eavesdropping on a private family matter. I didn't belong here. Moving quietly out of Luke's room, I progressed past the living room and was just about to open the front door when Luke called out my name.

“Where are you going?” His face seemed strained in the cascade of lamplight.

I wasn't sure if it had to do with his parents or because I was leaving. Who was I kidding? Of course, it was his parents. I'd be a wreck if my parents were fighting like this all the time.

“I'm going home. You have your hands full here.” I turned, and opened the door, and walked out. All of a sudden, I felt like crying. I don't know why. I guess it must have been because of Luke. He had this colossal burden to carry, and yet I had to go and break his heart. He told me things were stressed at home, but I had no idea how bad.

I'd just made it down the driveway when Luke called out my name again. I rotated around to see his concerned gaze, and the sight almost brought my tears to the surface. “Luke, go back to your parents. They obviously need you. I can get home fine. I've lived in this city all my life.”

“Yeah, with a population of 36,000 and one of the lowest crime rates in the country.” He moved in closer. “But all it takes is one time to change that statistic. I don't want that to be you.”

A tear slipped down my cheek. Why did he have to be this great? I mean, I was horrible to him, and he was angry at me. He could deny it, but I knew it was true. His parents were in an awful fight and yet he was still worried about me. If I wasn't already trying to purge him from my system, I might just kiss him because a kiss from Luke sounded really great right about now. “OK,” was all I said.

“Come back inside. I'll give you the homework, and you can look through it while I take a quick shower. Then I'll drive you home.”

Twenty minutes later, Luke escorted me back outside to his car to drive me home.

His dad had already left and his mom had gone to bed.

During the five minute car ride, neither one of us said a word. In fact, Luke kept his eyes focused on the road ahead of us at all times. Not once did he deviate.

When we neared my house, he stopped in front of the neighbors. I guess he didn't want to get me into any more trouble. Staring out the front window, Luke started speaking. “If you're interested, we can still study for the Geometry test. Maybe we can get a couple more kids and form a whole study group. I know you'll be busy tomorrow, but how about Sunday after church?”

“Uh, yeah, that should be fine.”

“OK, good.”

“Luke…”

“I'm sorry about my parents. It's just…”

“Has it been like this the whole time?”

“Yeah, nowadays they fight whenever they get together. They've been bad for a long time, but it's gotten worse since my sister's accident. The divorce went through right after that.” He glanced at me. “About a year ago, my sister was in a car accident and she's been in a coma ever since. I mean, she was in a coma. She…uh…” Emotion caught in his throat as he tried to finish. “She died six months ago.”

A slight ache pulsed at my chest. His sister had died. It wasn't from just divorce his family suffered; it was also the loss of his sister. And then I remembered the day Josh had tried to race us, and Luke had answered so strongly that he would never endanger anybody that way. He must have been thinking about how his sister was injured.