Bad Luck Black Money (16 page)

Emerald was the first to find a bag full of canned meats in the woods. There were more bags of food than they could carry. They dumped out several bags full of foods, which they didn't care for, and loaded up on things they liked. Each of them carried as much as they could without hurting themselves.

"Where to, Dad?" asked Emerald.

"Yes, dear, where to?" chimed in Esmerelda.

"Hmmm," said Boss. "I'm not sure.... Any suggestions? And before you say anything, we're not staying with relatives or friends or business acquaintances."

"That certainly narrows it down," said Ruby.

"How about Shiny Christmas World?" asked Emerald. "Technically, my unofficial lease has expired. But nobody is using the building. It's just sitting there gathering dust."

"Sounds like a plan to me," Boss said, as he started walking down the road.

Esmerelda walked beside him and said, "You're taking this too lightly. We're broke... homeless... defenseless."

"We're not defenseless," replied Boss as he slid his shirt back, revealing the .38 pistol.

"Were did you get that?" asked Esmerelda.

"From one of the bags, back in the woods."

"I hope you don't get us all killed," sighed Esmerelda.

"Don't worry, I know what I'm doing," Boss said.

One of their former gardeners named Pablo drove his old pickup truck past them, then stopped and backed up to talk with Boss. "What's up, Boss?" he asked.

"Not much of anything," Boss answered. "We're walking to the old Shiny Christmas World building."

"You still own that?" asked Pablo, who was sitting in his truck with the window rolled down.

"We never owned that," said Boss. "Emerald rented it awhile back. So, we're going to break in and stay for a couple of days."

"Ha ha," laughed Pablo. "Now you guys are the ones, jumping the fence and being illegal."

"Something like that," Boss said.

"Yall jump in the back of the truck, and I'll give yall a ride there."

"Thank you," Esmerelda said. "That's mighty nice of you."

"No," Pablo said as Ruby was climbing in the rear of the truck. "Ladies ride up front. Men ride in the back."

The fence surrounding Shiny Christmas World was secured by a padlocked gate, which was easily picked open by Emerald.

"Do I want to know where you learned how to do that?" asked Boss.

"Probably not," Emerald said, as he led the way toward the empty building.

The building's front door had an ordinary pin-and-tumbler lock, which was child's play for Emerald to open. There were empty boxes and trash scattered all around the place. The electricity had been shut off, so the lights didn't work. For some unknown reason, the water was still working so they had a working toilet.

Boss's family got to work, cleaning the place as best they could. They tore apart some of the cleaner cardboard boxes to make beds of. Ruby found an empty, steel barrel so they started a hobo fire on the receiving dock. It wasn't cold; they just wanted something to do.

As they warmed Vienna sausage over an open flame, Boss spilled the beans about their membership in the New World Order. At first, everyone seemed skeptical about Boss's claim. But the more they thought about it, the more it started to make sense. Someone or something had to have power and wealth beyond belief to bring a multi billionaire like Boss to his knees in a single day.

Boss told his family of the previous evening he spent with Duke Winterfield at a bar. He conveniently forgot to tell them that it was a nudie bar. Boss weaved the story of the tall, old man who predicted an upcoming, manmade apocalypse. And he spoke of how the Duke seemed to delight in the pain of what he called, 'useless eaters'.

After Boss had finished talking, they stood in complete silence, except for the crackling fire. Then Emerald asked, "How can we fight someone, who has that much power?"

"That's the point of all of this, son," Boss said. "We cannot do anything about any of this.

After another day passes, Duke Winterfield gave me his word that he'll restore our wealth and even add more to it. Our current predicament is his way of saying, 'Look what I can do to you without even trying. Imagine the horror that will befall you, if you betray me'."

"OK, then let's not betray him," Ruby said.

Chapter 21

Diamond sat on his bed in an economy hotel by Highway 49 in Gulfport, Mississippi. The sounds coming through the sheetrock, which divided his room from his neighbors, were terrifying. Diamond didn't know if the two guys next door were fighting or fucking or both.

Nobody would call Diamond a wimp. He was an elite athletic specimen. Under normal circumstances, anyone would have to be crazy to pick a fight with him. But these weren't ordinary times. He'd always had an extra layer of protection, one who packed a .45 semi-automatic. Without a bodyguard, he felt vulnerable.

There was a doughnut shop near the hotel, where Diamond had filled his stomach with a dozen, hot doughnuts and coffee. Now, he was feeling the effects of all those empty calories. He felt sluggish, bloated, and borderline nauseous.

"Maybe some TV will calm my nerves," he thought as he pushed the 'on' button on the TV remote control, which was bolted to the nightstand. He flipped through the channels but found nothing on worth watching.

So, he left the TV on the business channel for noise cancellation. He hoped it would drown out the fellatio going on in the next room. At least, he hoped the racket was oral sex and not someone being choked to death.

"This time yesterday, I was with a goddess. Now, I'm trying to block the sounds of homosexual, rough sex out of my ears. How does anyone fall so far, so fast?" Diamond thought aloud.

Earlier, the cashier at the doughnut place had flirted with Diamond. Women of all ages liked to flirt with him. Normally, it was a good thing, as natural as the falling rain. But for some reason, the flirtations from the middle-aged cashier had made Diamond uncomfortable.

Something on the business channel pulled Diamond out of his self-imposed bout of anxiety. A talking head on the TV was talking about a bloodless coup d'etat in Africa. Although he didn't follow any of his family's businesses very closely, Diamond knew that his father had invested heavily in Africa. He wondered if this might be the source of his father's current financial problems.

"Something bigger must be going on," he thought. "Even if all of father's companies went belly up, the family still has enormous amounts of diverse assets scattered across the globe. We should still be filthy, stinking rich."

In an attempt to clear his mind, Diamond dropped to the floor and started doing pushups and sit-ups. He took a break to shove a chair underneath his room's doorknob and then went back to exercising. If some psycho broke into his room after he was physically exhausted from exercising... he didn't want to think about it.

**

The next day as Boss and family were doing some yard work outside Shiny Christmas World, an old Cadillac drove up to the locked gate. It was the owner, a middle-aged woman with obviously, black dyed hair in a bad perm. She blew her horn and called for Emerald to open the gate for her to drive through.

Teresa York pulled her Cadillac under a big oak tree on the grounds and called for Emerald's family to come over. Not bothering to get out of the Cadillac, her first words to them were, "What are yall doin' on my property?"

"We are cleaning up the place a little bit," said Boss.

"Yall ain't got no business being here," responded Teresa with a cough. "Yall are trespassin'. I good a mind call the cops."

"Why would you do that, Ms. York?" asked Emerald. "I've paid you a lot of rent to use this place."

"Yeah, but you ain't paid nothin' for this month, so out you go."

"Ms. York, is it really in your best interest to be so mean?" Emerald asked. "We need a place to stay tonight, and in return, we're cleaning the place up as best we can."

"I didn't 'OK' that. I don't need a bunch of squatters bringin' down my property values. Now, get out."

"Yes, ma’am, Ms. York. That is your right. But before we leave let me ask you a question.... Do you think we are going to stay down and out, for very long? Aren't we the kind of people who always land on our feet? And when we do, do you REALLY want to be on our bad side?"

"Are you threaten' me, boy?" asked Teresa. "Cause I can just call the cops and have yall locked up?"

"Ms. York, is it?" asked Boss, trying to calm her down. "Emerald has a tendency to run his mouth too much at inappropriate times. I want to assure you that he meant nothing by it.

And by the way, when I get my tax situation straightened out, I may want to call you about purchasing this lovely property. Is there a number where you can be reached at?"

"Emerald's got my phone number.... You serious about buying this here place, cause it ain't goin' to be cheap?"

"I wouldn't dream of taking advantage of someone, who helped my family when we were in need. You can expect an above market price offer on this wonderful space.... So, you wanted us to leave, right now?"

Teresa leaned her head back against the seat's headrest and thought about what she'd just heard. She then said, "Nah, yall can stay awhile. No need to rush off. It ain't like I got nothin' planned here today anyway.... Yall want me to bring you some fried chicken? I got some left over in the fridge at the house."

"Thank, you, for your kind offer," Esmerelda interjected. "But we have plenty to eat and drink. Would you like to join us for lunch?"

"Nah, I best be goin'. Time is money as they say. I'll give yall a call when your luck turns around," said Teresa as she cranked up her Cadillac and roared off.

Boss shot a disapproving look at Emerald and said, "You can catch more flies with honey than vinegar."

**

Diamond awoke early in the morning when his neighbors slammed their door shut. "At least, they're gone," he thought. "No more angry sex sounds coming through the wall."

It was too early for breakfast, unless he wanted to walk to a nearby greasy spoon, which served waffles and burgers at all hours of the day and night. He turned on a radio, which was bolted to a shelf next to the television and tried to find a station with some local flavor.

A morning show originating from Houston, Texas, sounded interesting. They called it the Walton and Johnson Show. Truly, they tested the boundaries of free speech. If the show were broadcast in California, the normally mellow hippie population would tar and feather the entertainers then burn the radio station to the ground. But this was in the Deep South, where everything seemed more intense and surreal.

All Diamond had to do was to hang on for one more day, and then his life would hopefully return to normal. He had discovered that the old wise saying, "Money doesn't buy happiness," was wrong. Money had bought him plenty of happiness. If being poor for a couple of days had taught him anything, it was that being poor sucks ass.

**

The sun was setting, and Boss was firing up the hobo barbeque when Sarge and his men arrived at Shiny Christmas World.

"Is everything alright, sir?" asked Sarge, who walked up to Boss's family while his crew combed the perimeter.

"Yes," answered Boss. "What are you doing here?"

"We work for you, Boss, unless, you fired us. The Duke didn't say anything about being fired."

"You talked with the Duke of Winterfield?"

"Yes, sir, he released us from the warehouse. We came to find you as soon as we could.

By the way, it wasn't our fault about what happened back at the club. Those dirty spooks gassed the whole block. How were we supposed to guard against an odorless, colorless gas? They were fighting dirty on a whole other level."

Esmerelda spoke up, "Well, it was nice of everyone to come check on us, but we cannot pay for your services. In case you haven't heard, we're broke."

"Umm," mumbled Sarge as he scratched the top of his head. "No, you're not, ma’am. The I.R.S. dropped the proceedings against your family. Oh, and Pluto Technologies once again owns its African oil fields. The government just handed everything back over. Beats all I ever seen."

"I did not know that," said Boss.

"And the Duke wanted me to tell you to be sure to check your bank accounts. I don't know what that's about."

"Can we go home now, father?" asked Ruby.

"I think so," Boss answered. "Sarge, did the Duke have any other messages for me?"

"Uh... right, I almost forgot. He said it was time for Diamond to leave the nest. Don't know what he meant by that either."

"I do," Boss said.

Turning to Emerald, Boss instructed, "You take care of your sister. Your mother and I have to fly to Gulfport, Mississippi."

**

Checking his Rolex Daytona wrist watch for the tenth time before dawn, Diamond worried that this being poor thing might last longer than he was told. He only had enough cash left, to stay one more night in his reasonably priced hotel room.

Then it hit him like a lightening bolt out of the blue. He was wearing an eighty thousand dollar watch! If push came to shove, he'd just pawn the watch.

It gave him pause for a minute that such an obvious solution to his immediate money woes had eluded him for so long. But with an insurance policy on his wrist, Diamond felt more at ease. He had enough cash to last one more day then he'd have to pawn the Rolex.

There was a knock on his door. It was too early for housekeeping. The new, next-door neighbors had been quite. So, who could it be? Diamond leaned over the chair blocking the door handle and peeked out the keyhole. It was his mother and father.

After shoving the chair out of the way and unlocking the door, Diamond pulled open the door and hugged his mother.

"I am so happy to see you, mother," Diamond said. He reached his hand out to shake his father's hand without breaking Esmerelda's embrace. "And I'm happy to see you, too, father."

"Aren't you going to invite us inside?" Boss asked.

"Of course, come in; come in. Is everything all right? Are we rich again? Can I go home, now?"

"Well, the good news is that, yes, we are rich again. The bad news is that you're not," Boss said.

"What?" asked Diamond.

"Esmerelda, can you tell him?" said Boss, while looking around the small hotel room.

"Look, Diamond," Esmerelda said, as she sat on the bed and motioned for Diamond to sit beside her. "Life isn't fair. You are going to have to grow up fast."

"What?"

"I changed my mind," interrupted Boss. "Let me do this.

Son, we've just been schooled on how the world really works. Turns out, we have to step up our game. And you've got to change your ways, big time. No more life of leisure. It was fun while it lasted, but now you have to prove yourself."

"Prove myself to who?"

Esmerelda injected, "It's best you don't know, son."

"OK," said Diamond getting off the bed and starting to pace. "Bottom line, are you kicking me out of the family?"

"No, son," spoke Boss. "You'll always be our son and part of our family. But your free ride is over.

I've prepaid this hotel room for a month. Here is one, two, three, four, five hundred dollars. That's all your getting, so don't waste it."

"Mom, you can't be alright with this," pleaded Diamond.

"Diamond," Esmerelda said. "You're a full grown man. It's time you started acting like one. So, nut up and make something of yourself."

With his hand outstretched, Boss commanded, "Hand over the watch, son."

Instinctively, Diamond put his left wrist, on which he wore the Rolex Daytona, behind his back. "Say what?"

"The watch," Esmerelda said. "You don't get to start off with a small fortune. Use your mind, your good looks, this has to be all you, none of us."

"By the way," Boss chimed in. "Lose the name Hopenhammer, from now on you're Smith or Jones or Doe."

"I can't believe you're taking my watch," said Diamond as he took off the watch and handed it to his father.

Boss dug in his pocket and pulled out a twenty-dollar bill. "Here, go buy yourself a digital watch at the store across the street. No, wait... here's twenty more dollars. Buy yourself a good digital watch."

Esmerelda hugged her shocked son and said, "I expect to see you within the year. By then you should be rich in both self-respect and money."

Boss went over and hugged his son. They both said, "Goodbye", and then they were gone. Diamond was left standing in the middle of his room in a state of shock. His world had been shaken and flipped on its head. A mountain of obstacles had been placed in front of him, and he was expected to overcome them quickly.

Stranded in the poorest state in the nation, Diamond counted every penny in his possession. The grand total of his currency was $614.87 and not a penny more. Boss said that he had prepaid a month at the hotel, so Diamond would have a place to stay for a month. But then what?

The first thought that crossed Diamond's mind was to count cards at one of the coast's casinos, but even playing with an advantage there was a good chance that he'd go broke before doubling his money. And the one thing he definitely didn't want to do was lose what little money he had left. The obvious, short-term solution was to get a job.