Balancing Act (26 page)

“And what are your work hours?”

Tessa swallowed. “I work from six in the evening to three in the morning, Tuesday through Saturday.”

This time the judge frowned at her. “Who cares for Zach while you are at work?”

“My neighbor, Mrs. Flores, keeps an eye on him.” She answered the judge in a monotone as he continued to ask questions, but inside she was sick. She didn’t need to be a mind reader, she could feel how this was going.

“How do you plan to care for both your brother and the child you now carry?” The judge glanced down at the file. “It doesn’t appear from your check stubs that your income will allow you to adequately care for two children.”

“I’ll manage,” Tessa said.

The judge stared hard at her. “What role will the father of your child play in helping you?”

Tessa’s chin jutted. “None. We don’t communicate.”

The judge looked down at the file again and back up at Zach and her. Tessa knew what was coming and her whole world started to unravel.

“I’m afraid, Miss Edwards,” the judge began, “that in looking at the changed circumstances now presented to me, I must re-evaluate your custody. It’s not a matter of where you work.” His hard glance rested on her aunt and uncle. “Nor is it even a matter of your status as an unwed, expectant mother. The bottom line for me, Miss Edwards, is that out of a twenty-four hour day, you are a presence in Zachary’s life for roughly three to four hours. Other than that, he’s in the care of either the school or your neighbor. I believe at this point in time, Kathleen and Edwin Price can provide a more stable and secure home. I therefore award custody to the Prices along with control of the trust fund left for Zachary Mallory until such time as the court deems otherwise.”

“Tessa?” Zach pleaded, trying to understand. “What does he mean?”

She squeezed his hand and hugged him close. “It means you will go with Uncle Edwin and Aunt Kathleen for right now.” Tessa lowered her voice to a whisper. “But I promise you, Zach. I’ll get you back. I’ll find a way.”

“
No!
” Zach pushed to his feet and made a run for the door, but the bailiff caught him. Tessa started after her brother, but her attorney held her back. She watched in horror as Uncle Edwin and Aunt Kathleen brushed past her and approached Zach. Edwin Price bent down and said something to her brother. He slumped in defeat, then left the courtroom with them.

Tessa sat at the table, staring down at her clenched hands. She’d lost Zach.

“Miss Edwards?” her attorney prompted. “It’s time to go. Can I get you anything?”

Tessa shook her head. “No.”

She called in sick. Aunt Kathleen phoned the following morning to arrange to pick up Zach’s belongings. Tessa packed them mechanically, shutting off the emotions threatening to drown her. She’d let him down. She had promised her mother she would care for him, and she had let them both down.

Tessa avoided conversing with her aunt and uncle as they loaded everything in their car. As her aunt started to get back into the passenger seat, Tessa blurted, “Please take care of him, Aunt Kathleen. Please…” Her voice trailed away and she swallowed. “Tell him I love him.”

“No need to worry,” her uncle said in a bracing tone. “He’ll be fine with us. We registered him at the local public school this morning, and he’ll do fine there.”

Tessa stared after their departing car for a long time. She shivered in the cold of the December day.

Chapter 15

There were a few tense moments going through customs in Kabul before Seth boarded the plane back home. He spent the night in Beirut in a luxury hotel that he billed to Barrett following a call to Brandon to clear it. His brother was overjoyed to hear he was coming back.

“I’ve appreciated the use of the brownstone, but I found a place to rent and I’m ready to move first of the year.”

“That’s great, Bran,” Seth said. “You haven’t heard anything more about Tessa, have you?” There was enough of a hesitation on the other end that he prompted, “Brandon?”

“It was a small blurb under legal notices.”

“What?”

“A custody hearing earlier this week. Her aunt and uncle were given custody of Zach.”

Cold filled Seth. He remembered Edwin and Kathleen Price from the hearing he’d attended with Tessa. They were not interested in Zach’s welfare, just their own. He knew how much the boy meant to her. She must be out of her mind with worry. After hanging up with Brandon, he tried Tessa’s home phone, but it rang and rang, not even picked up by an answering machine.

It was two more days before the taxi pulled up in front of his brownstone. Seth paid the driver before slinging his backpack onto his shoulder and climbing the steps to the front door. Seth saw the twinkling lights of the Christmas tree in the living room and it dawned on him the holiday was a week away.

He’d decided on the way home he would continue with plans for a different future…one away from the overbearing presence of his parents.

He’d put a bid in on a community newspaper on the market near his beach house. The paper had never been a real moneymaker, and the family who owned it was tired of being tied to it. Seth was waiting to hear back from them, but felt like he stood a good chance of getting it. That left Tessa. What would he do about her?

She didn’t want him. She had made that more than obvious, but try as he might, he couldn’t get her out of his head or his heart. He would take her on any terms he could get. And right now, with Zach in the hands of their aunt and uncle, she was vulnerable. If that was blackmail, then so be it.

It was late Sunday afternoon before the effects of the jetlag faded. Seth was sitting in his study when he heard the distant sound of the doorknocker. His housekeeper had the day off. Seth knew it wasn’t Brandon because his brother had a key. Half-tempted to ignore the knock, he finally padded for the door in his bare feet. A light rain fell, and he knew the weather forecasts called for the possibility of a switch to freezing rain. Not bothering to tuck his chamois shirt back into the waistband of the well-worn jeans he wore, Seth made his way down the hall. The small figure outside the door had just turned away when he opened it.

“Tessa?”

She looked over her shoulder, raising a pale, shadowed face to him. Her hair was wet and she shivered.

“Is Zach here?” she asked, a note of desperation in her voice.

“Zach?” he asked in some consternation. It was the last question he expected her to ask. “No.”

If possible, her porcelain skin lost even more color. She started to sway. Seth pulled her inside and shut the door. She had a rain slicker on, but the hood had fallen back. In the light of the hallway, she looked no better than she had on his front steps.

“Let me have your coat, Tessa. You’re soaking wet.”

As she let it slip from her shoulders, he saw the swell of her belly beneath her thick sweater.

“He’s run away, Seth. I thought maybe…” Her voice trailed off, and her chin trembled.

Seth turned her into his arms and held her shivering frame against him, trying to share some of his warmth with her. She felt cold, and her paleness worried him.

“You thought he might come here?” he finished for her.

She nodded against his chest. “He’s been missing since yesterday. I’m so afraid. The police came to my house last night and then to where I work. I think they thought he might have come to me, but he didn’t. I don’t know why.”

When her voice broke on a hoarse sob, Seth swung her into his arms and, in spite of her protests, carried her into the den, where he laid her down on the long, plush couch facing the fireplace. Picking up a poker, he stirred the fire and added another log to it.

“Stay there, Tessa. I’m going to get you some hot chocolate to help take the chill off you, and then we’ll talk. Okay?”

* * * *

She nodded and watched him go. He’d changed in the past few months. He was thinner and his hair was so close-cropped it looked more like a military cut, but she noticed his eyes the most. They were shadowed and shuttered, as if he’d become a master at keeping his emotions buried so no one could see them. Not even outbursts of his infamous temper broke through his remoteness. Had she done that to him? Was he another person she had let down?

She stared into the fire, trying to feel its warmth, but not even a spark sank into the coldness at her very core. She shivered again and looked around her as she brushed a limp strand of hair behind her ear. In the far corner of the room was an elaborate model of an older sailing vessel, every detail lovingly portrayed.

“I built that with my grandfather’s help,” Seth said as he handed her a steaming mug of hot chocolate, “when I was not much older than Zach is now.” He watched Tessa as she took a cautious sip from the mug she held cradled in her hands. Other than the swell of her stomach, she knew she looked thinner.

“Do your aunt and uncle still have custody of Zach?”

“You know?”

Seth nodded. “Brandon told me over the phone when I called from Beirut.”

Tessa looked away from him. “The judge said my job took me away from him too many hours of the day. He said he didn’t think I could care for Zach and the baby, but I can, Seth.”

Seth’s mouth thinned. “Drink the chocolate, Tessa, and warm up. Then let’s focus on Zach. He’s bound to be someplace he feels comfortable.”

* * * *

He watched her like a hawk as she drank from the mug. In a few minutes, a small bit of color returned to her face, but she still looked exhausted. Hot chocolate and a fire wouldn’t change that.

His gaze drifted down once again to her belly. She caressed the swell of her baby bump, and to his amazement, he saw her hand move as if it had been shoved by an unseen force. He was overcome by an incredible urge to kneel down in front of her so he could share the experience of the baby’s movement, but now wasn’t the time.

His child. The thought struck him with more force. The child growing in her belly was
his
child. No matter what she might want to deny, there would always be that link between them. If she was still determined to keep him shut out of the baby’s life, then she’d find she had another fight on her hands. But now wasn’t the time to go into that. Now they needed to find Zach.

* * * *

Tessa set the mug down. She hadn’t wanted it, and had swallowed it to make Seth happy. Her mind kept coming back to Zach. She had felt so sure that if he hadn’t come to her, he would try to find Seth.

“He knows how to get to the Barrett building, Seth. Do you think he might go there?”

Seth shook his head. “Security would have called someone by now if that were the case, but we can drive by if you like.”

She lifted wide blue eyes up to him. “You would do that?”

“I don’t know what you think I am, Tessa,” Seth snapped. “I care about your brother. I’ll help look for him any way I can. Now come upstairs and let me see if I can find you a sweater to wear. The one you have is soaked.”

She followed him into a master bedroom almost as large as her whole apartment. It was furnished in earth tones with a plush beige carpet so thick, her feet sank into it with every step. She hesitated in the middle of the room while Seth riffled through the closet. At last he came up with a thick fisherman’s sweater.

“Believe it or not, this belonged to Anna. She left it here, and I almost forgot I still had it. Try it. I think you’ll find it will fit.”

When she stripped off her own damp sweater, it revealed her loose pink turtleneck. She watched as Seth’s eyes dropped once again to her stomach. Without the camouflage of her sweater, her swelling belly was more defined. He swallowed, but instead of saying anything, he turned away. Fatigue washed over her as she stared at the broad barrier of his muscled back.

“It fits,” she said, seeing no relaxation in his tense shoulders.

“I’ll get you a jacket.” He found a waterproof parka almost big enough for her to use as a sleeping bag. “This will have to do. It will at least keep you dry, which is more than can be said for what you arrived in.”

Tessa nodded, sensing not one bit of softening from him.

He put her in the Escalade and started the engine. “We’ll try Barrett first.”

“Thanks, Seth. Thanks for helping.”

He grunted in reply and put the car into gear without looking at her.

* * * *

Seth’s eyes narrowed as he noticed the way the rain was hardening on the windshield. The weather had deteriorated even more by the time they arrived at Barrett. Seth parked out front on the deserted street and used his key to get in. A security guard met them at the door.

“Mr. Barrett!” the guard said in surprise. “Welcome back! It’s been a while.”

“Thanks, Charlie. We’re looking for a little boy, eleven years old with red hair and freckles. Have you seen him anywhere?”

The guard shook his head. “No, sir. And that’d be one boy it would be hard to forget. The police were already here earlier today, and I told them the same thing.”

Seth put an arm around Tessa’s shoulders and pulled her into his side. “Thanks, anyway, Charlie.”

“No problem, sir. I’ll let you know if I see anything.”