Bending Under Pressure (12 page)

“Thanks.”

Walter chuckles. “You’re welcome.”

I pull away, feeling awkward now that the moment is over. When Mom comes over, her stony glare on me, I’m confused. What did I do?

“How did he know you were here, Haley?”

A touch of guilt washes over me, even though I’m certain it shouldn’t. “He texted me yesterday.” Mom perks an eyebrow, waiting for me to explain. I see Keelan from the corner of my eye, obviously waiting for me. “He said he was sorry and wanted to do dinner. I said I had a match. That’s it. Can we talk about this later? My friend is waiting.” I tilt my head toward Keelan, bouncing on my toes with eager excitement, even though I lost.

“We will be discussing this later,” Mom promises. She gives me a hug. “Good game. You have an hour before you are to be home for dinner.”

The moment they step away, I quickly walk over to Keelan with a ridiculous, goofy grin. “Hey.”

“Hey,” he says with a mega-watt smile. It drops as he continues, “Sorry about your matches, Hales.”

“Can’t win them all, right?”

Keelan nods. “Right.” An uncomfortable looks passes on his face as he rubs his hand over the top of his head a few times, from his forehead to the nape of his neck. “So, turns out, I met your dad.” When my shoulders sag, he wraps an arm around my shoulders and leads me to the bench. “Want to talk about it? He said he was here to surprise you.”

“Oh, he surprised me all right,” I mumble. “Maybe I’m not so ready to give him a second chance. I mean, did you see me hug my stepdad? I barely spoke to him before I found out what my dad did.” I pause. “He didn’t happen to say why he brought the girl, did he?”

Keelan shakes his head. “Sorry. Will it make you feel better to know that I’m supposed to meet Natalie again on Thursday?”

“How are you feeling about it?”

He shrugs. “Kind of excited, but mostly unsure.”

I bump his knee with mine. “I think you’re brave.”

“What? Why?” He frowns.

“Well, you don’t really know her, right? Just what you remember when you were a kid? You’re practically throwing yourself into an unfamiliar situation head on. Makes you brave.”

Keelan laughs. “I wouldn’t say I’m throwing myself into it head on, Hales.”

“You’re still doing it.” He shrugs and doesn’t seem to want to talk about it, so I move on with a smile. “You’re a lucky guy, you know.”

“Oh, yeah? How come?” He bumps his knee against mine and it sends a bolt of electricity through me. I wonder if he feels it when I do the same to him.

“You get to see me Friday, Saturday,
and
Sunday. Seth invited me to his party.”

He gives me his perfect smile again. “I am very lucky. So, why does Jess want you to stay over?”

“She says we need girl time. Do you think I should be worried?” I joke.

“With Jess, you should always be a little worried.”

I laugh because I totally get what he means. Jess is a firecracker. My stomach rumbles, and I’m thankful he doesn’t seem to have heard it. “I should get home.”

Keelan nods, stands, and holds out his hand. I take it. He walks me to my car, opening the door for me once I’ve unlocked them. His gaze drops to my lips. Then, he quickly looks into my eyes before placing a hand on the back of my neck and bringing me to meet his lips. Oh, boy. I’m so not made for kissing hot guys who know how to kiss. My entire body slacks, my knees weaken, and each breath is stolen from me because he’s inhaling them all. But I seem to steal each one of his.

When he steps back, releasing his hold on me, I sigh dreamily like the crazy girl that I am. It just slips out!

“Had to make up for the hammock incident,” he says in a low voice.

“You’re redeemed,” I whisper.

Keelan laughs. “Good. I’ll text you.”

With that, I get into my car and head home. The good, high feeling Keelan left me with disappears when I walk into the kitchen. Mom doesn’t waste a moment.

“Why didn’t you tell me your father contacted you?”

“I didn’t realize you needed to know. I’ve never told you before.” I plop down at the table and start making my plate.

“I thought after what happened, you would. It’s hard to know what’s going on with you when you won’t talk to me, Haley.”

“You don’t exactly make it easy, Mom,” I snap. God, she all of a sudden wants me to tell her my every move? Is she serious? Even now, she won’t talk just to me. She’s having what I think should be a conversation between the two of us in front of Walter. I push my plate away from me and stand. “I’m not hungry anymore. I’m going to shower and go to bed.”

“Haley, we need to talk about this.”

“Talk about what?” I shout as I whirl around. “He texted me. I didn’t tell him to come. In fact, I didn’t even ask you to come! I shouldn’t have to tell you when Dad texts me. I wanted to tell you, but I felt bad because part of me wanted him to come and it didn’t feel fair to you. I didn’t say anything because I thought you would be upset and now you’re upset because I didn’t tell you. It’s impossible to make you happy unless my name is Walter!”

I turn on my heels and make a run for my room, locking the door behind me. Why is it so hard to get along with my mom?

Natalie: Can I come to your game tomorrow then?

I’m such a freaking idiot.

An hour before I’m supposed to meet with Natalie, I text her to cancel. I’m tired, I have homework to do, and honestly, I don’t want to go. Maybe I’m conveniently procrastinating, too. And now, she’s sent me that message. How weird is it that she knows tomorrow is a home game for me? Is she following my football schedule?

Ugh!

I hate this.

Me: Sure.

“Shouldn’t you be getting dressed to meet Natalie?” Cam says as he enters my room, sitting down in his usual seat.

“I canceled, and now, she’s coming to the game tomorrow.” The pressure I always carry around gains about a hundred pounds. There’s pressure to be a good kid for my parents. Pressure to do well in school. Pressure to excel on the field, so I can hopefully get a football scholarship. And now, I have the pleasure of adding the pressure to give Natalie a chance, to show her I’m just fine without her, and to prove myself. I don’t even know why I feel like I have to prove myself, and my family, to her, but the pressure to do it is there.

What if I crack and break under pressure? I feel like I already am.

Frustrated, I run my hand over my head.

“That’s cool,” Cam says, ignoring my distress. “Why did you cancel?”

“I have homework,” I reply simply, even throwing in a shrug for good measure.

Cam laughs. “Good enough, I guess.” He clears his throat and rubs his knuckles over the five o’clock stubble on his cheek. The dude can grow a beard like no one’s business, but Jess doesn’t like it, so he keeps his face clean-shaven. He’s nervous about something. He always rubs his knuckles along his jaw.

“What’s up?” I ask, giving him an opening.

“Jess is ready.”

I crinkle my brow. “Ready for what?”

Cameron stares at me like I should already know. When I raise my brows at him, he sighs. “For sex. She wanted to wait, remember?” I nod. Since they started dating, from what Cam has told me, Jess has been adamant about not having sex until she felt ready. Two years have passed, and it looks like she’s ready. “Well, we’ve hit all the bases except home, obviously, and she said her parents will be gone next weekend on a second honeymoon or something, so she wants to do it then.”

“And you’re nervous?” I laugh. I can’t help it. Rarely does Cam get actual nerves that make him worry about something. He’s too laid back. It’s good to know that there is something in this world to make him squirm.

He narrows his eyes, picks up a nearby shoe, and throws it, hitting me square in the chest. “It’s not freaking funny, Keelan! Just because you lost your virginity last year to some stupid senior doesn’t mean you can laugh at the fact that I’m scared as hell. This is
Jess
we’re talking about!” Cam crosses his arms over his chest, pissed off now.

I rub my chest, ignoring his jab about Beth, the senior who lured me into her claws last year and who I had sex with a grand total of two times before she moved on to someone else. I hold my hands up. “Okay, okay. Sorry. Aside from the actual sex, what are you nervous about? Jess isn’t going to break up with you when it sucks.” When Cam sighs heavily, getting angrier, I quickly add, “What? It’s going to suck! Pretty sure the first time always sucks for the girl and not to mention, it’s going to be really awkward.”

“This is not what I wanted to hear, Keelan!”

I ignore his panicking. “Don’t forget to buy condoms and lube.” Cam doesn’t look any calmer than he did when he walked in here. In fact, he looks worse. “Look, this
is
Jess. You don’t have anything to worry about. You’ve both waited two years for this and if Jess says she’s ready, then she’s ready. As long as you make sure she’s doing okay, go slow, and take advantage of her parents being gone, y’all will be fine.”

“Got it.” He nods his head. “But it’s supposed to be special, right? How do you make something awkward special? Jess is expecting
something
. I can feel it.”

I shrug. “You know her better than I do.”

He’s quiet for about a minute. “Why couldn’t she surprise me? Why did she have to set a date? It’s all I can think about.” He groans as he stands. “I’m going to my room.”

“You could probably talk to Dad if you wanted.”

Cam whips around to face me from the door. “Yeah, no. He’d tell Mom in a heartbeat! Dad’s cool, but no.”

“Suit yourself.”

Once he’s gone, I start on my homework, with a weird feeling that Jess is going to eventually be my sister-in-law.

M
y heart is beating a hundred miles a minute. I could barely focus all day because of this sight before me. There’s my parents, Jess’s parents, Jess, and Haley sitting in one section of the bleachers and a few rows down in the next section is Natalie. There’s a younger girl with her too. Is she my sister, Kiera? She looks nervous and her gaze keeps jumping from me to Natalie. She didn’t say anything about bringing Kiera. Shouldn’t she have asked first?

Shaking my head, I turn back toward the field. The game is about to start and it might be helpful if I’m paying attention. Cam, our quarterback, leads us onto the field. Not to brag, but we’ve been on the varsity team since we started playing in high school. We’re that good. It’s how I, a lowly sophomore, was able to land that senior last year. Not wanting to think about Beth, I finally focus on the game.

I love football. Sometimes, I wonder if I love football or driving my car more. If I had to pick one or the other, I’m confused as to which I would pick. Football is amazing, especially in a small town like ours when the whole dang town comes to watch every single game. They’ll even travel to see some of the away games. How can a player not get absorbed in that? The crowd roars with every play, either in excitement or with disappointment. Because trust me, they aren’t afraid to yell out how poorly we’re doing.

I love charging into another player and making him fall to the ground with a thud. I love the struggle if they don’t go down easily. I love running down the field. The sound of pads crashing together gives me chills of excitement. Football is one of the best things on earth.

Except, tonight, it sucks.

It sucks so badly.

We’re being dominated. To make matters worse, it’s raining just enough to wet the field and make it slick. By half-time, we’ve had one touchdown and the other team is ahead by thirty-something points. The rain hasn’t let up from its steady falling pace either.

“What the hell is going on out there?” Coach roars. “We beat the shit out of those boys last year and they’re here in YOUR house, handing your asses to you!” None of us makes a peep. It would be stupid to make a comment. “How are we going to make it to state this year if y’all can’t even beat Laney’s team? You’re going to get your heads out of the fucking ground and play some football!” He starts going over plays, points out big errors we made, and threatens hellish practices to come if this game ends in a loss.