Betrayal (10 page)

‘No’ I reply
sadly, ‘but that’s ok’

‘It won’t be
easy on your own’

‘I don’t
imagine it will for one moment’ I smile, ‘thank you for everything Sarah’

‘My pleasure,
good luck Maddison not that you will need it’

Moving day has
finally arrived.  I realize it is a good job I already own a decent
four-by-four as I load up on Saturday morning.  I have left all of the
furniture in the flat and had new delivered to the cottage signifying my new beginning
and yet my car is filled to the brim with personal items. 

Courtney
wanted to help but had already booked a holiday for her and Dave.  I insisted I
wanted to settle into my new home alone anyway inviting them both up for the
weekend in two weeks’ time to visit instead.

I am gazing
around the tidy flat reminiscing on the memories good and bad that have been
created here when Cassie calls up, ‘Maddie, someone here for you’

‘Ok’ I call
back before turning and exiting the flat that has kept me safe for the past
three and a half years. 

As I enter the
shop I notice a very pretty pregnant woman standing by the counter, her eyes
find mine and I smile politely.

‘Hi, can I
help you?’ I cannot help but glance at her bump, ‘looks like you joined the
same club’ I smile.

‘Yes’ she
smiles, ‘I wonder if I could take five minutes of your time Maddison’ she
queries quietly.

‘Sure, sorry
have we met?’ I direct her to a table in the corner.

‘No. But we
have a mutual friend’ she sits with a gush of relief as I follow.

‘Oh who?’ I
enquire curiously.

‘Brad
Thompson’ her green eyes search mine as if she expects the flinch that occurs
at his name.

‘O-k’ I
stutter, ‘and you are?’ my insides flutter at the mention of his name before I recover
and send a guarded look her way.

She flicks her
dark hair a similar color to mine over one shoulder, ‘don’t become defensive
Maddison he doesn’t know I am here.  My name is Lucy, Brad is a good friend of
mine and my husband and we are extremely worried about him’

‘Why what’s
wrong with him?’ I test frowning.

‘He is a mess
over all this business’ she informs me.

‘Really?’ I scoff,
‘because from where I am sitting he couldn’t give two shits about any of this
business’ I answer sarcastically ‘I haven’t heard a word from him in two
months.  Doesn’t exactly signify heartbreak does it?’

‘He confided
in you about his past?’ she states as if that excuses his lack of presence.

I shrug, ‘so?’

‘Then you will
be aware of how your actions have affected him’ her eyes hold a spark of anger
‘until recently we were not aware of Brad’s past’

 ‘Again, what
has that to do with me Lucy?’ my insides are squirming with the guilt that
appears at the mention or thought of Brad Thompson.

‘He misses you
but is devastated at the fact you deceived him’ she confides.

‘I realize
that but there is absolutely nothing I can do to rectify that now’ I sigh, ‘believe
me Lucy, the very last person in the world I would wish to harm is Brad’ I rub
my bump subconsciously.

‘And yet you
did’ she accuses.

‘What is it
exactly you want Lucy?’ I fume as my phone buzzes on the table.  I move my hand
to collect it but Lucy lifts it before I manage it.

‘Nice photo’
her eyes find mine as if she comprehends everything.

I retrieve the
phone from her hand gently and silence it my eyes moving across the screen as
my thumb strokes his face.

‘Do you love
him?’ she asks gently.

‘I will always
love him’ I take a shaky breath, ‘but I have caused too much damage to salvage anything
between Brad and I don’t think I am not aware of that’ I glance up into her
eyes and take a deep breath. ‘Now please I am moving today so again is there
something you specifically wanted?’

‘No, I think I
have all I need’ she stands, ‘where are you moving to?’

‘The south
coast’ I express vaguely, ‘a great place to bring up children’

‘How are
they?’ she smiles her eyes moving to my bump.

‘Heavy’ I
admit, ‘when are you due?’

‘Four weeks’
she moves her hand across her swollen middle, ‘I cannot wait’

‘Me either’ I
grin, ‘good luck Lucy’ I shake her hand.

‘And you’ she
smiles grasping my hand, ‘this is our address if you need anything please
contact us, or even if you need to speak to Brad….’

‘Thank you but
I won’t require anything’ I assure her, ‘and I think it is for the best if I
let him be now as you so eloquently pointed out I have caused enough hurt’

‘Will you let
me know that the babies have arrived ok?’ she tests her head tilted towards me.

‘Do you have
an email address?’ I ask reluctantly.

‘Sure’ she
takes the paper with her address on and scribbles on the back.

As she turns
to walk out of the door I call her ‘Lucy’ she turns, ‘look after him’ I
instruct and she nods.

‘I am trying
but he won’t let me’ with a wave she is gone.

The drive to
my new home is emotional, the thought that he is still suffering pains me
tremendously.  I only think of him as angry as that is the last picture I have
of him in my memory but to learn that he is devastated cuts me deep inside.
Tears roll down my cheeks as I drive down the motorway and I dash them away, I
am so sorry Brad I recite in my head.

********

‘What do you
mean you went and met her’ I fume at Lucy.

‘I had to see
for myself what all the fuss was about’ Lucy cares nothing of Brad’s crankiness
she lives with Cameron, she is immune.

‘Why are you
getting involved?’ I query angrily.

‘Because I am
your friend and I care about you’ Lucy shrugs.

‘Nothing to do
with me’ Cameron holds up his hands in defense, ‘I wasn’t even aware’

‘So what did
she say?’ I have to know despite my insides screaming, who cares!

‘Not a lot,
not the most forthcoming woman I have ever met’ Lucy mentions.

‘Fucked up!’ I
scoff.

‘Actually I
think she is less fucked up than you think.  If she was fucked up she would be
pursuing you, instead she has resigned herself no matter how much she loves you
she isn’t good enough for you’ she glances at Cameron.  ‘I know Brad I lived
the same situation’

‘She doesn’t
love me’ I scold, ‘she is too selfish to love me’

‘I don’t
agree.  Great picture by the way of you and her in Antigua you looked happy’
Lucy raises an eyebrow.

‘What
picture?’ I frown.

‘On her phone
screen there is a selfie of the pair of you laying on a sunbed’

I smile
despite myself as I remember when that picture was taken.  We had been drinking
enjoying our last afternoon….

‘And there it
is’ Cameron interrupts.

‘What is?’ I
enquire.

‘That look,
you are a goner mate’ he passes Brad a plate and grins towards his wife.

‘Is she well?’
I ignore Cameron.

‘Tired and
huge, bigger than me’ Lucy notes, ‘I imagine she is tiny without being
pregnant’

I nod, ‘tiny!’

‘Anyway, she
is no longer in London she has moved to the coast’

‘The coast
where?’ my insides lurch at the thought of not knowing where they all are.

‘I don’t know
she wouldn’t elaborate for obvious reasons but the South coast is all she
informed me. Brad…’

I glance up.

‘She is
gorgeous’

‘She is’ I admit,
‘but she is a liar’

********

I wander
around the finished cottage with a smile on my face, it is just as I imagined
all freshly painted.  I wander into the babies’ room and glance around at the
lemon walls and the freshly polished wooden flooring to the thick rug.  The two
cots have been placed either side as I instructed despite the fact that I will
put them in one cot together to begin with.  I had employed an interior
designer to completely dress the house to save me the bother due to my
condition and the distance so the whole house was decorated, furnished and
ready for us just to slot into.

I walk
aimlessly through the house admiring the work of the different trades, the
lounge fireplace was enchanting with a real fire set behind a fireguard with a
railway sleeper sitting above it serving as a mantel.  I turn and examine the
huge soft sofas in a beige color with patterns on the cushions. I love it I can
imagine sitting in front of the fire with the babies on my knees except in my
mind the picture includes Brad snuggled with us. My heart lurches as per usual
at his name and I sigh.

As I gaze out
of the Kitchen window at the water below I feel a sense of peace within me, we
will be ok whatever happens we will be ok. 

********

‘All I am
asking for is her address’ I argue with the young feisty girl standing before
me with attitude written all over her face, her hand on her hip daring me to
challenge her.

‘And all I am
telling you is that it is confidential information.  I know very well who you
are Mister you are the baby daddy who hasn’t been near or by for the past seven
months’ she looks at him as if he was the devil himself.

‘Ok her phone
number’ I attempt, ‘I am not intending to cause any problems here I just want
to ensure my children are ok’ I assure her gently.

‘Well I can help
you there, they are fine!’ the young woman’s lips are tight her eyes cold.

Brad is so
frustrated, ‘please I need to speak to Maddison can you ask her to call me on
this number?’

‘Sure, I will
give her your message’ she sends a sarcastic smile his way.

Brad taps his
phone as he walk out to his car, ‘Lucy, can you get me her number, her address
anything!’

‘Brad calm
down what’s happened?’ Lucy queries.

‘I need to
speak to her’ he panics running a hand over his face.

‘Why the
change of heart?’ she shocks.

‘It’s not her
it’s my children I need to know my kids’ it had been during the middle of
another nightmare regarding Daniel that he woken up and panicked at the thought
of the same thing happening to the twins and them not knowing their dad loved
them.

‘I don’t have
a number or anything Brad, she took my email address and promised she would let
me know when she gave birth that’s all’

‘I have to
find her’ he speaks to himself more than Lucy.

‘I will see if
Cameron has any ideas’ Lucy promises.

‘How’s Louisa?
I am sorry that should have been the first thing I asked’

‘She is
gorgeous and is currently being spoiled by her daddy he won’t put her down for
a minute’

‘Enjoy every
moment’ I breathe as my insides ache at the memories.

‘Calm down and
call us later’ Lucy soothes gently, ‘it will be ok Brad’

‘Ok thanks’ he
is at a loss, at least Daniel knew Brad loved him.  His small life may have
been cut short but was filled with unconditional love. Whether he knows
Maddison’s children or not the fact remains he is their dad how can he walk
away?

Lucy turns to
her husband, ‘we need to help him Cameron he is losing it’

‘What does he
need?’ Cameron kisses the top of his daughters head as she snuggles into him.

‘He needs
Maddison but he doesn’t know how to find her’ she sits and strokes her
daughters hair.

‘Pass my
laptop’ he calls.  As Lucy passes the computer he hands his daughter over to
her mummy ‘I will locate her, I can find out details from her business address.

‘Mr I.T man in
action’ she smiles as she places a kiss on her daughters head.

********

‘Everything ok
Cassie?’ I answer the phone when I view Cassie’s name flashing within my
screen.

‘Baby daddies
on the war path and he isn’t relenting.  He has been creating about wanting to
know your whereabouts’

‘What does he
want?’ I frown, I thought he had decided to duck out!

‘He tells me
he needs to know his children are ok’ Cassie relays.

‘Oh dear’ a
mixture of emotions rush through my body irritation that he hasn’t remained
away as he instructed he would and joy that he is interested.  I sigh, ‘give me
his number please Cassie’ I need to nip this in the bud I cannot have him
turning up at the coffee shop creating whilst customers are present.

I am sitting
out the front of the cottage with my achy feet up on a stool watching the world
go by.  Taking a deep breath I tap the phone to connect to Brad.

‘Brad
Thompson’ he barks into my ear and my insides flutter.