Better Than Me (13 page)

***

Deep breaths.
I
can do this.  I CAN SO TOTALLY DO this.
  On an average day, I repeat this phrase to myself often, but today, right now, marching down the stairs from the fifth floor to the second floor, I actually believe it.  Believe it deep down.  Davis is trailing behind me.  I have asked him to come, but told him to stay at a Minimum Safe Distance.  That made him laugh.  He is hanging back, down the hall and slightly around the corner from Jake’s door.

One more deep breath.  I can hear some talking inside.  I knock with purpose.  Jake answers and as he pulls the door further open, I can see Suzette.  She doesn’t look happy.  But not because I’m there.  I think she was already unhappy.  

“Jake, I want to say something and then I’m going to leave.”

“Biz, no…
let’s talk about this.”

I continue, not acknowledging his plea.  “
You’re a damn hypocrite.  I was never with Davis like that.  You were just looking for a way to keep me and bang Suzette at the same time.  I don’t want a scene and I don’t want any drama.  I want you to know that I really thought you were a great guy, even when you weren’t.  I wanted so badly to be your girlfriend. For you to really know me, love me.  I don’t think you know how to do that.  I don’t know if I do either, but I am pretty sure you are not the person I am supposed to figure that out with.  I know what you did,”  I gesture to Suzette.  “I sort of get why, but it was really shitty of you. And I don’t want to be with you anymore.” 

“C’mon, Biz
,” he pleads.

“Why are you even saying that
, Jake?  You don’t want me.  You want to use me.  You’re probably using Suzette.  Goodbye, Jake… Remember, No Drama.  I don’t want to hear about this in the cafeteria and all over Weldon until I graduate.  And another thing…”  I am just guessing here, but given the look of his face I say it. “I’m glad Davis punched you.  Then I add, “Oh, and Suzette, I am NOT sorry I barfed on your stupid one-of-a-kind furry Ugg slippers.”  

He shuts the door
and immediately I hear Suzette yelling.

“Oh My God. . . .
She
broke up with
you
!  That is hilarious!  After you were kicking me to the curb, she broke up with you.”   Shaking my head, I turn and walk away.  When I finally look up, there is Davis at the end of the hall.

Chapter
17: NOW-After the Break-up

I slowly walk down to Davis, looking into his mischievous eyes.  They’re laughing.  “I heard the whole thing. . .you were amazing, Biz.”  I pick up speed as I close the distance and run straight into his arms.  He hugs me tight and swings me around, “You did it!”  I melt into his chest, sighing and then inhaling his scent.  I love that smell. I could just stay like this forever. 
Whoa, I COULD just stand here like this forever.
  He pulls away, tips my head up by my chin and gently rubs his hand along my jaw.  I think my heart will jump out of my chest.  The zap and buzz I feel when I am around him is going crazy.  Stronger than ever.  He pulls away, smiles and then turns slightly, as if to leave.  

I reach out for
his hand, lacing our fingers together.  “Where are you going?” 

He tilts
his head slightly, “Back to my place.  I just came by to make sure you didn’t get hurt. I’m glad I could help.”  He sounds down.

“Not so fast, Mister
.” 

“Mister?” 

“What, like that’s worse than being called a Dragon?” 

Davis looks amused and allows me to lead him back to the Disco elevator and press the up button
.  “Are we really going up in that thing again?” he complains mildly, gesturing to the elevator door. 

“Da
vis, it’s been a rough day.  Second semester hasn’t even started yet.  I don’t have the energy to climb the stairs one more time, so once it gets here, whip open that door again and then walk me back to my room… Mister.”  The elevator is taking a little longer than usual.  It’s so unpredictable.  Standing in front of it waiting, I look down at our hands together.   Then I turn my head slightly and look all the way up him.  Physically, he is remarkably stunning.  I knew Davis had a beautiful body, ever since the night he slept on my floor, but have never allowed myself to think about it for very long.  I eventually get to his eyes.  My favorite thing about him.  So far.  He’s been watching me watch him and gives be a half grin.  We fuse into each other—

l
ooking at one another in a way we never did or could before.

The elevator’s arrival i
s announced with a ding that pulls us out of our mutual daze.  We get in and Davis quickly shuts the gate and door.  It’s a small elevator.  Even with just the two of us, there isn’t room to pace or move really.

Davis asks
softly, “Are you really okay?” 

“Yeah, I think I am” 
And I really do think I am, but now I have to figure out how the heck I am going to talk about my feelings, my decision about Davis.  “Mavis?....” 

“Aw, Jeez are you gonna start
that again?”

I giggle.  “Maybe.
”   Then I become serious.  “Why did you come help me?”  He sighs a really long sigh and hits the emergency stop button on the elevator.  The ancient lift bumps to a halt.  The small space is now buzzing with energy.  My hairs on my arms are standing up and my heart is beating a little faster. 

“What you had or what you thought y
ou were going to have with Jake was not love.  It wasn’t anything like love.” 
Okay, here comes the lecture from Mr. Engaged Dude. 
He turns away slightly and runs his hand through his hair.  I would love to reach up and touch it.  It’s only then that I notice it looks different, shorter.  He’s cut his hair like in that dream I had.  He’s wearing a black fitted button down, too.  Just like in the dream. 
I hope this isn’t just a dream
.  Turning back to me he says, “I know what love looks like.
”  I am going to puke if he starts talking about his girlfriend and I’m more than a little jealous.
“I was…” He turns on me.  “NO, I AM in love…”  He is right in my face, his forehead almost on mine.  We are still holding hands.  Man, am I confused.   All I can think to say is
Lucky Girl
, so I do.  Sadly. 

“Lucky Girl
.” 

Davis’ amazing green eyes lock
onto mine and I see them go from very serious to crinkling up with amusement.

“I hope SHE thinks so.”  In the next
second, he kisses me quickly. I can’t think to do anything but respond and I kiss him back, lots of small kisses, that soon turn to a slow, deep kiss that I am wishing would never stop.  My heart is pounding so loudly, surely Davis can hear it.  During the kiss I have thrown my arms around his neck and have my hands in the back of his hair
.  It feels so thick and silky. . .I’ve always wondered how it felt.  
He has one hand on the back of my neck and one on the small of my back, urging me forward toward his pelvis while at the same time pushing up against the carpeted wall of the Disco elevator. 
Wait. This guy is engaged.  Shit, Biz.  Knock it off. 
That thought prompts me to pull away from his lips.  I bring my hands to Davis’ chest and push away.  He is not letting me move from him and has moved on to kissing the side of my mouth and my cheeks and eyes.  I grab both sides of his jaw with both of my hands to stop him and look him in the eyes. 

He softly
and sexily whispers to me, “Because SHE is YOU.” 

I am very surprised, confused but surprised and well, relieved.  My eyes begin to well up.  My head is spinning from the past few hours and this is pushing me over the edge.  I give out
a little sob.  “I thought. . . I thought you were talking about your fiancée?” 

“No, Lizard Breath, YOU
.”  Tears fall down my face and I am laughing and crying at the same time.  Only Davis would say something so sweet and tease me by calling be that nickname at the same time.  He is laughing, too, and his eyes are a bit glazed over.  “Just you.  As a matter of fact, that’s why I ran off so quickly when I kissed you after finding you crying in The Space.  It was hell to stay away from you, but I couldn’t be with you until…..Biz, I broke up with Kathleen.”

“Really?” 

“Really.  I didn’t know how this would all work out, but I needed to be better for you.  Better than Jake, than anyone. After you kissed me, I needed to make it right.  I decided NOT to wait. To do something right away to change how things were going.  That’s why I left you so suddenly.  I am going way out on a limb with this…risking a lot.  I think you probably deserve better than me, but I know that’s not Neil or Jake or any of those idiots that hurt you.  If you’ll let me, I’d like to prove it to you.”  I’m unsure if I get all the words he says after he calls me Lizard Breath, because my head is spinning with joy.  I get the gist, really I do, and they are wonderful words to hear.  I’m sure subconsciously, I’m absorbing them all and will replay them over and over in the future, but in this moment all I think to say is, “Mavis.”  Then I pretty much just fling myself at him.  He pushes the entire length of his body up against mine and I push right back.  My nipples are instantly tight.   I feel my body shivering at the same time the space between my legs is beginning to feel very warm.  And we kiss.  I suck on his bottom lip as his tongue parts mine and strokes my tongue.  I have never kissed so long and hard in my life, barely stopping to breath before slamming our lips and tongues into each other again.

Davis pulls
the emergency stop button and the elevator starts moving.  After what seems like minutes more of holding each other and kissing, the elevator dings to a stop on the fifth floor.  Davis puts both hands low under my butt and hikes me up so my thighs wrap around his waist and I am positioned right…there.  All the while he is still kissing me.  He reaches over and once again throws open the gate and door to the elevator.  Still kissing me and holding me firmly against him, he walks out of the elevator and down the short distance to my dorm room. 

I hear
a few people down the hall whisper, none too quietly, “Holy crap, is that Biz?  Who is she with?  I don’t think it’s Jake.”  I couldn’t care less.  Davis slides my body down his when we get to my door, allowing me to feel every inch of him. 

“Biz, you’re here,” Davis informs me
, still looking deeply into my eyes.  I’m whimpering at the loss of contact.  I don’t want to stop kissing him.  I don’t want him to stop holding me against ALL of him.

“You wanted me to walk you back to your room, right?”  I can’t speak.  Davis loves
me.  He shifts his gaze repeatedly toward something to the side of me. Oh, he’s indicating my door.  “Lizard Breath, you need to get your key out.” He laughs at me, amused at my silence. 

“Oh, right.”
I finally answer.  I get it out, unlock the door and walk through, still holding Davis’ hand.  He doesn’t move through the door with me so I turn around, “Mavis?”

“You do know calling me that is sort of emasculating, right?”

“Trust me, nothing could emasculate you,” I tease as I tug him into my room. “Please come in.”

“Are you sure about this?”  he asks gently.  I nod yes.  “Because if we do this, it won’t be a one time thing.  You are going to be stuck with me.” 

“Yes, I’m sure.”

Standing in th
e middle of my room, he’s pulls me close.  He kisses my hair on the top of my head, and then moves to my forehead.  I tip my face up to take in his gorgeous dark green eyes and they are full of love and…lust.

“I’ve missed you so much, Biz.”
  He kisses every part of my face and is turning his attention to the area below my ear and down my neck.  I grasp his shoulders and slide my hands down his thick muscular arms and then back up to clench them around his neck and run my fingers up into his hair again.  As this is happening, I can’t shut up.  I just keep talking, rapidly and excitedly, “Davis…Oh, I’ve missed you, too,” I gasp.  “Mav, I can’t believe this is happening… I am so happy.  Baby, I have wanted you so much.  I dreamed of you.  I dreamed of you, just like this.  Shorter hair, black shirt. Is this a dream?  Oh, I hope this is not a dream.” 
I cannot shut up
.  Davis has run his hands down my back and up under my t-shirt in front.  One of his hands has come up to cup my breast.  He runs his thumb over one of my tight, aching nipples.  Lower down, I feel the unreal vibration and heat intensify. “That feels amazing…” I tell him.

“You are doing that
babbling thing again, Lizard,” Davis moans near my mouth as I begin to move my hands down to his lower back to where his jeans begin.

“I
know, I’m sorry, I get excited.” I gasp.

I hear a smile in his voice. 
“I can tell.  I have to tell you when you do that… that babbling thing?  It turns me on so much.  Every time you do it, I think about how excited you are.  How you’d sound if I made love to you.  The excited noises you’d make when I was inside you.  It gets to me, everywhere.”  He pulls me up to him, slightly tilting his hips.  I look down.  He is excited.  Hard.  Ready.

“I don’t know how to stop talking so much.  You might have to help me.”  And with that phrase his mouth is slashed to mine.  Licking underneath my top lip, biting the bottom
, and then violently both our lips part and our tongues are tangled in each other.  I moan loudly.  Clothes are flying off at light speed.  We stop kissing only long enough so that both our shirts come up and over our heads and are tossed in a pile at the end of the bed.   Davis steps back and looks at me and lets out a long sigh.

“What’s wrong?” I frown.

He is staring at my pale pink bra with black ribbon trim.  “Nothing anymore.”

Pulling me in to kiss me again, his hands sweep around my back and he unfastens my bra, slides it off my arms and throws it into the pile with the shirt.  The feeling of his beautiful,
ridged chest and abs against me sends a burning sensation right down to my toes.  I am doing everything to savor the moment and not just throw myself on him and wrap my legs around his waist.  Davis has other ideas.  He has leaned down and cupping my breast, laves the tightened nipple with his tongue, and he then sucks it into his lips, licking it hard with his tongue.  The burning sensation increases rapidly. 

“Please, please, I want you so badly.  Mmmmm.  Please.”

“We’ll get there, Lizard.  Trust me.”

“I do.”  I realize right then, I do trust him.  Completely.  It only amps up my need.

Davis kisses down my body and circles his tongue in my belly button.  I giggle.  He stops briefly, looks up and smiles at me with those gorgeous guy-linered eyes.  Then he’s right back at it.  Unbuttoning my jeans, he pushes them over my hips.  As he slides them down my legs, his nose is rubbing up and down the front of my matching panties. 

“You smell so sweet and hot.”  His voice is husky.  Davis
inhales deeply and kisses me over the top of my panties at the apex of my thighs…right… there.  Soft, erotic, tingly kisses.  I slide my hands across his strong muscular shoulders and then up into his hair.  So soft.  And then, suddenly, in a series of fast, urgent moves, he stands.  My hands fly to his jeans and rip at the buttons.  Grasping my lower back and pulling me to him, while I push his jeans downward, with the other hand he gives them a shove so they move lower and kicks them off and grabs them with a free hand at the same time.  He lays them over the edge of the bed.