Blossoms of Love (39 page)

The day went by too fast for them. Soon they had to leave. They got a taxi and went to the airport. Lamont checked her bag. He said, “We’re a little early. Want to go to the lounge for a drink?” She said, “I’d rather go out on the top deck and watch the planes come and go.”

Just as they got up there a big plane came in. Barbara asked, “Monty isn’t it hard to handle one of those planes?” He said, “Not if you know what you’re doing.” Barbara was trying to make conversation so she wouldn’t cry, “The plane you fly, isn’t it hard to land on a moving ship?” He said, “It is if the ocean is rough.” He looked at her and kissed her on the forehead. He asked, “Why all this interest in planes?” Barbara said, “I’m trying to not think about me leaving.” It was then her plane came in.

Lamont walked to the gate with her. They just stood looking at each other for a second, then he very gently pulled her to him and held her. He said softly in her ear, “I love you Barbara.” She choked as she said, “I love you too for as long as I live.” He looked down at her, “Thank you baby for three of the happiest days of my life. I’ll have nice memories to think about on the ship.” He chuckled, I’ll probably get horny when I think of our nights.” Barbara said, “Monty, let me catch a later plane. We would have a little more time together.” He said, “No, I want to see you on that plane so I’ll know you’re alright.” Still clinging to him she said, “Monty I just can’t leave you. Let’s go to Canada or Mexico. I’d be happy living there with you.” He said, “You know I wouldn’t desert the Navy. You don’t mean it.” Over the PA system, they called her plane. He kissed her long and sweet. He looked at her as if he was trying to paint a picture of her in his mind, “So long angel baby.” It was all she could do to keep from crying as she went through the gate, she looked back, “I’ll be waiting for you.” He winked at her. When she got to the door of the plane, she turned and threw a kiss to him. He waved back. He watched the plane circle. Barbara saw him, tears were in his eyes. By the time the plane was in the sky, she was crying as if her heart would break.

Ann met her. Barbara was so quiet in the car Ann asked her, “Is anything wrong?” She answered, “No. Ann it tore me apart when I had to get on the plane and leave him.” Ann sighed, “I wish this war would end.” Barbara said, “Ann, Monty asked me to marry him when he gets back. He’s gonna get a divorce just as soon as he can. He loves me, he really does love me.” Ann said, “Barbara that’s just wonderful!” Barbara looked at Ann driving, “How do you do it? I feel so dead inside about Monty.” Ann answered, “Just lie from day to day and pray that he will come back.”

Everyone was happy to hear Lamont and Barbara would get married when the war was over.

In May, David came home for a week. They all gathered at the Ellman house so everyone could be together to celebrate David coming home. The phone rang. It was Ellen’s father. When she came back in the living room she was so excited she could hardly talk. She said, “That was Dad. He heard over the radio that the war was over in Europe.” Everyone yelled. Alice turned the radio on. They heard the same news. Barbara asked, “What about the South Pacific?” Allen said, “It won’t be long until it will over now.” David said, “That’s right. We’ve got them on the run too.” Everyone began laughing and crying at the same time.

The phone kept ringing. Neighbors and friends calling about the good news. Mrs. Ellman said, “Maybe it won’t be long until I’ll have my other sons home where they belong.”

On a hot Sunday in July, the Ellmans were outside. The children were playing in the yard and the adults sitting on the big porch enjoying a cool breeze from the north when a police car came up the road. The same policeman got out of the car. He said, “Mrs. Ellman, I have a telegram from the Navy to you.” Everyone froze. Even the children stopped playing. Mrs. Ellman put her hand to her mouth, “Oh no, not again.” Johnny took the telegram and read it. Tears were in his eyes. Mrs. Ellman said, “Which one this time?” Johnny said, “It’s Monty.” Barbara screamed, “No! No! He promised he would come back.” The policeman said, “He was shot down over enemy territory.” Mrs. Ellman asked, “Is—he dead?” The policeman said, “They don’t know.” Allen said, “If they don’t know then he is missing.” Johnny said, “That’s what the telegram said, “Missing in action.” Barbara said, “He will be home. I know he will. He promised me.” Mrs. Ellman slowly sat down on the old rocking chair on the porch. Suddenly Barbara ran into the house yelling, “He promised—he promised me he would come back.” Ellen said, “Come on Alice. Ann and Carolyn will look after Mom Ellman, we’ve got to help Barbara.”

They found Barbara wasn’t in the house. She had went out the back door. When they found her, she was standing in the yard looking at Lamont’s house. When they were beside her, without looking at them she said, “I had a feeling I would never see him again.” Alice said, “There’s a good chance he’s alright.” Barbara said, “You don’t believe that any more than I do. He was shot down in enemy territory.” She began to cry, “He may be hurt bad. If he isn’t dead, they’ll torture him. Don’t they torture officers to get information from them? You know Monty. He would let them kill him before he would tell them anything.” Ellen said, “If there is any way possible, Monty will be back.” Barbara said, “He won’t come back. I’ve lost the only man I ever loved or will ever love.” She looked at Alice and Ellen, “I’ll be alright. Would you mind leaving me alone for just a little while?” Ellen said, “Are you sure? You won’t do anything will you?” Barbara said, “No, I wouldn’t have the nerve. I just want to go in his house. I feel close to him there.” Alice said, “Okay we’ll go, but if you stay too long we’re coming after you. You don’t need to be alone too much now. We love you Barb.” The girls left.

Barbara opened the door to Lamont’s house. She went straight to his study. Oh how the room looked like him. His books, the desk, and the guns. The guns were Lamont’s pride and joy. The gun case was built in the wall and it covered half of the west wall. On each side of the fireplace was a deer head. Over the fireplace was a fish. On his desk was a stuffed squirrel. She began to cry. She said, “Oh Monty, you’ll never hunt or fish again.” She sat down on the chair at the desk, “You’ll never smile again, oh God, I’ll never see you again. I’ll never feel your arms around me or hear your voice.” She remembered her father bringing him home. He was also bringing men who served under him home to see her. She remembered he was the most gorgeous person she had ever seen. When he smiled, his teeth were so even and white they looked false. Then her thoughts went to the night Lamont cried when he learned about Paul. Lamont loved his brothers. Then she thought of their three nights together. Three days of pure heaven. She closed her eyes. She could see his beautiful face and hear him laugh. Lamont didn’t laugh often but he had a little chuckle. She said as if she were talking to Lamont, “Darling, I am pretty sure you and I are going to be parents. I haven’t had a period since I was in San Diego. I’ve never been regular but it has been nearly three months. I hope I am going to have your baby and I hope it’s a boy just like you.” Her thoughts were interrupted by someone calling her name. She looked up and saw Carolyn and Ann. Ann said, “We were getting worried about you. You’ve been gone so long.” Barbara didn’t realize it was dark outside. Carolyn asked, “Are you alright?” Barbara sighed, “Yes. I just wanted to feel close to Monty.” They locked the door to Lamont’s house and started back to the Ellman house.

After they walked a few steps Barbara asked, “How is Mom Ellman?” Ann said, “She seems to be holding up good. Carolyn got some pills from the doctor. Bless her heart she certainly has had her share of heartaches from this war.”

For the next week, Barbara didn’t talk to anyone. She was sat in her room and cried. She was sick a lot. Mrs. Ellman was worried about her. Carolyn finally got her to go see Dr. Morris. After he examined her, he asked her to come in his office. She sat down in front of him and the desk. He looked at her. He asked, “Do you have any idea what your trouble is?” Barbara looked down at her hands, “Yes Dr. Morris. I could be pregnant.” Dr. Morris said, “You are pregnant. You are about eleven weeks.” Barbara asked, “This is strictly within your confidence isn’t it?” Dr. Morris said, “My dear, what is said in this office goes no farther.” Barbara said, “I need to talk to you.” Dr. Morris pushed a button told his receptionist he did not want to be interrupted unless it was an emergency. He lit his pipe and said, “Alright Barbara, I’m listening.” Barbara said, “This baby belongs to Monty. Now he won’t be coming back but I will have a part of him. I’ll live for this baby. It will be my whole life. Monty and I really loved each other. You must promise not to tell anyone. I don’t want the Ellman name hurt. They are all good people and they would be talked about if this was known. I’m going to leave before anyone suspects.” Dr. Morris asked, “Why don’t you stay here my child? You have no where to go or no one to help you. I’ve known Dorothy Ellman for years and I know she would understand. She would want you to stay knowing you are carrying Monty’s baby. That big house of Monty’s, you could live there.” Barbara said, “No I have to leave. This is a small town. I would disgrace the Ellman family. Allen is a minister. It would certainly hurt him. I love Mom Ellman and I won’t hurt her. I guess the main reason I’ve got to go is because I don’t want people talking about Monty. They would you know. I told you this because I really needed someone to talk to. Dr. Morris, I’m not sorry I’m pregnant. This baby was conceived by love and part of Monty will live on.” Dr. Morris said, “Alright Barbara. Your secret will go no farther but I do wish you’d stay on here.”

The next week, Barbara secretly prepared to leave. She told the Ellmans she had ulcers. They believed her. She was careful not to wear tight clothes but her stomach was beginning to round out.

In August, the atomic bomb was dropped. The Japanese surrendered. The war was over. Barbara looked at the pictures on the mantel. She thought the others were laughing and crying because the whole war was over, “The Ellmans gave so much. Two sons dead, one son lost an eye and another son lost a leg. Thank God Berry, Leon, and David got through it alright.”

A week later a young man in a Navy uniform knocked at the Ellman door. Alice opened the door. The young man asked, “Is this the Ellman house?” Alice answered, “Yes.” He said, “I’m Tom Woods. Lamont was one of my best friends.” Barbara was in the hall and heard him. She remembered the name. He was in Lamont’s squad. She remembered Lamont telling her he flew with him on missions. Alice stepped aside, “Won’t you come in? I’ll get Mom Ellman.” Barbara said to him, “Come in the living room. She will be here shortly.” He looked at Barbara, “You’re the girl who was with Monty in San Diego.” Barbara said, “Yes, I’m the girl.” Mrs. Ellman came into the room, “I’m Monty’s mother.” Tom said, “I was on my way home and I wanted to come by to show my respects for a fine officer. He was my captain and a good one.” Mrs. Ellman said, “Thank you son, I’m glad you came.” Barbara asked, “Could there be a chance at all that he is still alive?” Tom looked down at his hands resting on his lap, “Anytime a flyer is shot down in enemy territory they are always reported missing. That is, if we can’t locate him.” Barbara said, “You still didn’t answer my question. Is there any hope?” Tom said, “The captain was shot down where there was red hot fighting. The place was loaded with Japs. He parachuted out of the plane. I saw his shoot open but he was being shot at on the way down. I couldn’t tell if he was hit or not. Truthfully, I don’t see how they could have missed him. The Japs don’t hold many prisoners but he was an officer, he could be in a prison camp.” Barbara said, “Thank you Tom for being honest.” Then she left the room.

Mrs. Ellman said, “She and Monty were to be married.” Tom said, “Yes I know. Before he went on his last mission he talked about her often.” Mrs. Ellman asked, “Would you like a cup of coffee?” He said, “No ma’am, I have to go. I want to get home to my wife.” Mrs. Ellman thanked him for coming by. When he got to the door, he said, “I’m sorry Mrs. Ellman.” She smiled, “God bless you.”

In Barbara’s room, she kept seeing Lamont shot down. How helpless he was. She decided to leave at the end of the week.

The next day, Leon came home to stay. Berry called Alice and said he would be home in two weeks. That night when Barbara knew Mrs. Ellman was in her room, she knocked lightly on the door. Mrs. Ellman was surprised to see her, “Barbara dear, I thought you were asleep.” Barbara said, “Mom Ellman, I came to tell you I’m leaving tomorrow on the three-thirty bus.” Mrs. Ellman asked, “Leaving? Why?” Barbara said, “Monty won’t be coming back. I’ve got to find a place away. A place that doesn’t remind me of Monty every time I look at his house or the mountains, just everything here is Monty.” Mrs. Ellman said, “You have nowhere to go. You have no family. We love you and we are your family. I’ll need you when everyone is gone. Leon and Ann are going back to their house tomorrow. When Berry gets here, they’ll move back to their house. Don’t go Barbara. All I have left here is the ghosts of my husband and my two sons. One in his grave and the other God only knows where.” Barbara kissed Mrs. Ellman on the cheek, “I just can’t stay. I’ll come back, when I can stand the pain of seeing memories of Monty everywhere. I love you Mom Ellman. You’ve been a second mom to me.” She hurried out the door and upstairs.

When she got to her room she cried. When no more tears would come, she undressed for bed. She looked in the mirror. Her stomach was getting big. She had to leave as she planned. She looked out the window and thought, “Thank you my darling for giving me this baby. I hope it is a boy just like you. I hope he will have your golden hair and that beautiful smile. Oh Monty darling, I will live for our child. I will tell him all about you and teach him to love you. He will grow up being proud of his father. I can’t give him your full name since we weren’t married but he will have part of your name. If it is a girl, she will be equally proud of you. Oh Monty, I’m so glad we had those three beautiful days and nights.”

Everyone tried to talk Barbara out of leaving but of course, they couldn’t. She looked in the living room and walked slowly to the mantel. She picked up the picture of Lamont. He looked like a movie star or a male model in a Navy uniform. Mrs. Ellman went to the living room where she was standing holding the picture. Mrs. Ellman said, “Take the picture with you. I have a smaller one just like it and I have other pictures of him too.” She hugged the picture to her, looked at Mrs. Ellman and said, “Thank you.”