Born of Legend (46 page)

“Of course.”

“When I was a boy and it would get unbearable, I used to run and hide in the old archives or cellars of the palace. There I would imagine that I really was the long-lost son of Samari, and that she was in the shadows, looking for me. She would take my hand and turn me into one of the Dagger Ixurir so that I wouldn't have to go back to my room and deal with my aunt or grandmother. But no matter how hard I looked for her, she never came for me.”

“Is that why you chose your alias?”

He nodded. “I would also pray that my mother or father would come for me. That they'd remember they had a son.” He twisted her ring around on her finger. “But they never did.”

Then he locked gazes with her. “The whole time I was on that Ladorian base, I wanted them to kill me. I was so tired and hungry and hurt. Yet in the back of my mind, I saw your face, and all I could think about was how sad you look whenever you talk about losing your husband, and I didn't want to be your sadness. So I fought on and hoped that you'd come for me. But I didn't really think you would.”

A tear slid from the corner of his eye. “I will never doubt you again.” He dipped his head to give her the sweetest, tenderest kiss of her life. Never had she tasted anything like it.

His breathing changed as he rolled with her and he lifted the hem of her gown. “In all my life, you are the only one who has never disappointed me.”

“
Kimi ti,
Jules,” she whispered in his ear as he slid himself inside her.

He tightened his arms around her and held her close against him and cupped her cheek in his hand as he stared down into her eyes. “Just promise you'll never let me go.”

“Never.”

For the first time in his life, Jullien trusted and it terrified him. He was so vulnerable right now. In a way he'd never been before. Ushara alone had the means to utterly destroy him. No one had ever held this much power over his life and heart.

No one.

She possessed a part of his soul he hadn't even known existed. Closing his eyes, he lost himself to the warmth of her body wrapped around his. To the pleasure of her limbs sliding against his as she caressed his body and held his dark heart. She was so tiny and frail compared to him. Yet she was the most powerful creature he'd ever met. One frown on her face could cut him to the bone.

One cruel word from her lips could kill him.

And when she came a few minutes later in his arms, calling his name, he finally felt like he was home.

Most of all, he felt wanted. Growling low, he buried his head in her head and joined her in her release.

Ushara smiled as she felt Jullien tremble in her arms and surrender his weight to her. It was the first he'd done that. Normally, he was so careful to move away and not crush her. But she loved the sensation of his massive size pressing her down in the bed.

“Am I killing you?” he asked with a light laugh.

“No.”

He stayed there a moment longer before he rolled with her and settled on his back with her draped over his chest. “Will you stay in bed with me all day?”

“If that's what you want, yes.”

His gaze burned into her. “I do.”

She lifted his hand and kissed his scarred knuckle. “Then let me check to make sure my sister got Vas off to school and that she'll pick him up, then I shall be right back to stay right here until tomorrow morning.”

“She doesn't have to get him from school. I'd like to have dinner with him. I missed him, too.”

“Okay, then. Half the day in bed.” She kissed his cheek before she got up.

Jullien listened as she walked down the hallway. He glanced around the garishly pink and horrendously feminine room that had been hideous to him before he'd left. Now he found it the most beautiful place he'd ever seen. There was nowhere else he'd rather be.

After a few minutes, she came back with more food and drink. “They're all gone.” She followed his line of sight up to the rose and vine chandelier that cast rainbow prisms on the ceiling. “We should probably redecorate some, shouldn't we? Make it a bit more appealing for you?”

He dropped his gaze to her as she set the tray next to him. “No. There's nothing about you or your home I want to change.”

“Really? It's
very
pink in here.”

“And the best memories of my life have taken place in this very pink room. It doesn't bother me at all.” He reached for a piece of toast.

She gave him a suspicious tilt of her chin. “I thought the room made you want to do something masculine?”

He gave her a devilish grin. “I did do something very masculine with you. And I plan to do again very shortly, and much longer, and more thoroughly this time.”

Laughing, she handed him a glass of juice. “You're incorrigible.”

“I've been called worse.” He took a sip and reached for the fruit. “But there is something I'd like to do to your house later, if you don't mind.”

“As long as you don't launch it into space and set fire to it, it's your home, too. You can make any change you want.”

“Really?”

Nodding, she got up and went to the closet. “Really.” She opened the door.

Jullien gaped as he saw that she'd bought him an entire wardrobe and placed it there. “When did you do that?”

“After you left. It was meant to be a welcome home surprise. Vas helped me pick them all out. I also paid off your tithe with Zellen.”

“Why?”

“You're my husband, Jules. I wasn't about to have anyone else own a piece of you. Call me selfish, but I plan to keep you all to myself. The only ones I don't mind sharing you with are Vas and Nadya … maybe Trajen when he wants a drinking buddy. But only on occasion.”

Suddenly, her link started buzzing.

He frowned at a tone he wasn't familiar with. “What's that?”

“Not a good sound.” She went to the nightstand and answered it.

Jullien could tell by her expression and silence that it was extremely serious. After a few minutes of listening, she let out a tired sigh.

“Tell them that I'll be in shortly.” She hung up.

“What is it?”

“My father and uncle are demanding I resign as vice admiral.”

 

C
HAPTER
16

Jullien stared at Ushara in disbelief. “They want you to resign? Because of me?”

“No. They want me to resign because I'm about to bust their Canting and they know it. This is over
their
actions. Not yours.”

“Because of me,” he repeated insistently.

But she was being just as stubborn with her position as he was. “They broke the Code. They're the ones who did wrong in this. Not you.”

“I have a hard time faulting them for what they did when they were only trying to protect
you
.”

“Be that as it may, I'm not that forgiving for what was done to
you
. I want blood over this, too.”

He snorted. “Oh, don't let
this
,” he gestured at his calm, relaxed pose, “fool you. I'm not a saint or a martyr. I'm not about to forgive them. I'm going to exact my revenge. On my own. But that's between us. After all, I am a contentious bastard—the son of all bastards, for that matter, and an eton Anatole. We don't let shit go. Ever. That ship was just the first round. But they're your family. I don't want them angry at
you
.”

Laughing, she pressed her hand to her forehead as she finally understood why he was protesting her interference. He wasn't telling her to let it go because, like Chaz, he was trying to make peace. Rather, he wanted a piece of them himself. “That's so … messed up. But sweet. In a psychologically damaged way.”

“You knew I was broken when you took me in. This is on you,
mu tara
. I came into this marriage with a massive warning label.
And
a kill warrant. You knew, baby. You knew.”

“Yes. Yes, I did.” Sighing, she got up. “Let me go deal with this and I'll—”

“Oh, I'm coming with you.”

“Jules—”

“I'm fine, Shara. I had my nervous breakdown. Licked my wounds. Now I'm back. The one thing you can thank my psychotic grandmother and aunt for—I learned to snap back fast from the brink of insanity. I had to. I take the hard hit. Withdraw inward, catch my breath, get fucking pissed and come back fighting twice as hard, with renewed vigor and determination. That's what I do. It's why I'm still here and alive while the rest of my family is in their graves. Bitches rang my bell—their mistake. They let me up off the ground. Now, I'm answering the door. They want a piece of me? They're going to earn it. I'm not about to send you in there to fight without me. You go. I go. I'm your husband. My place is standing at your back, supporting you, every step of the way to Tophet and back. And defending you with my dying breath. You will never stand alone, so long as I'm here.”

He was so different from her first husband. So different from anyone she'd ever known. While she was used to strong males who would rise to fight and defend, they were much more overbearing with it. They were all too quick to shove her aside and take charge. Jullien knew when to lead and when to pull guard point. Unlike them, he wasn't threatened by the latter. He would defer to her as leader and remain in the background so long as she was given the respect he felt they owed her and only rise up to strike them down when they didn't.

Honestly? She adored that about him. He was like having a tamed battle-lorina on hand. Only he was much more charming and sweet.

Although,
not
better behaved when confronted, and a lot less predictable.

Definitely a lot more terrifying.

“All right,” she relented. “Arm up. This isn't going to be pleasant.”

“Did you miss the hole you just dragged me out of?”

She flinched at the memory. “I'm going to kill them.”

“Oh baby, please…” He bit his lip seductively. “I want the full honor, and first shot.” With an eagerness that actually terrified her, he scooted off the bed and went to shower.

Ushara let out a bitter laugh. He was a fighter. The high priestess hadn't been wrong about that. A true a son of Kadurr. She could definitely see the blood of the Samari in him. It made total sense. That unflagging spirit was what had saved her race and kept them going against overwhelming odds. In the face of it all, they had chosen to be dangerous.

Even so, this was going to get bad. Her father was very well respected and she was a young commander. Many here had never agreed with her appointment under Trajen's leadership.

Many had never appreciated the way Trajen had taken over, especially since he'd come in from a competing Nation.

That included certain members of her own family, such as Kirill's father who had never liked Trajen, or appreciated the fact that they were being led by a non-Andarion. They thought Trajen a normal human, and in their eyes that made him weak.

If they only knew …

By the time they were dressed and headed for the meeting, Ushara was sick to her stomach with worry and dread. If Jullien was nervous or apprehensive, he did a remarkable job of hiding it. He appeared completely calm and confident. Smooth even.

“How do you do that?”

“Do what?” he asked.

“Remain perfectly calm and composed when you're walking into the den of your enemies. Vas asked me that when you went to temple with us the first time, and he's right. Nothing seems to rattle you. Is it an innate aristocratic trait or something else? How do you manage such raw confidence and regal grace at all times?”

“Simple. You and Vas walk in with the fear that you're going to say or do something wrong and they won't like you anymore. Or that you'll screw up and lose their respect. I know going in they hate my guts. There's absolutely nothing I could say or do, including set fire to a baby or kick a puppy, to make them hate me any worse. So I have no ground to lose where they're concerned. It's actually quite liberating to know there's no way to make them like me. An act of the gods themselves could not swing them to my favor. So I have no pressure or fear of any kind. There is
nothing
I can do to fuck up. Anything I say or do will be socially unacceptable, talked about in the worst way imaginable, and misinterpreted by all. Might as well have fun with it and embrace the whole King of All Bastards they're going to accuse me of, anyway.”

She laughed and shook her head. “That is sad and yet terribly true, isn't it?”

He shrugged nonchalantly. “It's a blessing, really.”

Before they entered her office, she took a moment to straighten his coat. It was adorable to her how he always managed to have it slightly askew. He'd gone back to wearing his red glasses instead of the contacts, and in spite of his harsh, brave words, she saw the pain that haunted his stralen eyes. While he didn't comment on what had been done to him, she knew it hadn't just left new physical scars on his body. He had fresh ones on his soul, as well.

For that, she could murder her family. She saw the traces of it whenever he touched his bald head and winced in shame. The way he hunched his shoulders, then caught himself and straightened his spine as if determined to not show it to anyone.

Even himself.

He had an inner quiet strength and dignity that awed her.

With his full swagger in place, he opened the door and held it for her so that she could lead the way into her office.

And when they saw that he was with her, it set every pair of eyes on them, and a number of whispers began. Ushara didn't say a word to them as she swept into the room and headed for Zellen's desk.

“So much for my day off, eh?”

Zellen nodded. “Conference room?”

“Why not? Seems like a good place for a kangaroo court, doesn't it?”