Breaking the Cycle (12 page)

Max felt his blood boil in rage. He stood and paced to the other side of the room. He wanted the son of a bitch’s name. He would find him. And when he did…

“Max, I’m sorry,” Chloe whimpered.

Max shook himself from his murderous thoughts. He berated himself.
You numbskull. She thinks you’re mad at her.

He crossed the room to her and dropped to a knee. “Chloe, you have nothing to be sorry for. You did nothing wrong. You were right. This does change how I feel about you. What you just told me makes me want to wrap you tight in my arms and never let anything else near you. It makes me want to protect you with my dying breath. I won’t let anyone hurt you again. Never. I love you, Chloe.”

She smiled through her tears. “I love you too, Max.”

Max turned toward Dr. Spencer. “What if I came with Chloe to her appointments? That way, I know what we need to work on. Would that be all right?”

“I was just about to suggest that,” Dr. Spencer admitted. “What do you think, Chloe?”

“That would be great,” she sighed.

“This time next week?”

Chloe stared deep into Max’s eyes. He grinned. “Absolutely. We’ll be here.”

Max followed Chloe toward home. He thought about the appointment and Chloe’s revelation. His heart broke.
This is why she’s skittish around men. Who could blame her? After the nightmare she lived through. I have to make it so that she can trust me.

He smiled to himself.
She said she loves me.
He pondered harder on his situation. Suddenly, an idea came to him. He took the next turn and headed for the nearest store. His cell phone rang. He slid his finger across its face to answer it.

“I thought you were coming home,” Chloe pried.

“I am, baby,” he answered. “I just have to stop for something. All right?”

“Sure.” Her voice was uneasy. “See you in a bit. Love you.”

“Love you, too.”

Max hung up then turned into the parking lot. It took a while for Max to find what he wanted. Once he gathered the five items in his hands, he directed himself toward the card and party section. It didn’t take long for him to find a baby pink gift bag with mauve flowers and rope handles. He shook the bag open and dropped the things he held inside. He strode to the check out to pay for everything.

He set the bag in front of Chloe as soon as he stepped inside the house.

“What’s this,” Chloe questioned as she examined it. She crossed her legs beneath her on the sofa.

Max sat next to her. “Now that we’ve pretty much admitted we want a relationship with each other, things will eventually heat up between us. But I want to go at your pace.”

“You have high hopes,” she scoffed. “If I’m dictating the pace, we won’t get anywhere.”

Max shot her a dirty look. “There are five items in this bag. When you’re interested in that step of our relationship then you hand them to me. Take a look.”

Chloe stared at him uneasily then reached inside the bag. She pulled free a tube of cherry-flavored lip balm. “Lip balm?”

“When you’re ready to kiss me.”

“We’ve already kissed.”

“Not a sneak attack kiss, hoping I don’t set off your CVS. Long, slow kisses. Anytime we want. I want to kiss you good morning. I want to kiss you good night.” He could have sworn he heard her moan at the thought. His smile held a hint of evil.

Next, she pulled out a teddy bear. “And this?”

“When you want to cuddle with me. And before you protest that we cuddle, we don’t cuddle. We hang out together like buddies. We don’t hold each other for hours for the sake of being close.”

Chloe set the bear next to the lip balm. Next came a pair of stretch, woven, winter gloves. “Let me guess. Holding hands?”

“Exactly. Accompanied with letting the world know we’re Max and Chloe. Together. Lovers, not friends. By the way, do you know how hard it is to find gloves in the summer in Minnesota? The girl had to get them out of the back for me.”

“This all seems pretty innocent to me.” Chloe set the gloves next the other two items. She reached into the bag again. In her hand this time was a small, red candle in a clear glass holder. She gave Max a quizzical look.

“That’s the end of the innocence. It means romance. It’s to encompass all the things that happen between the three items on the table and the last item in the bag.”

Chloe took a deep breath. Her voice trembled. “So, in short, making out.”

“Yes. That’s a way to put it.”

Chloe set the candle on her lap and dug in the bag. She gasped as the final item fell out of her fingers onto the floor.

A box of condoms.

“You know we’re never going to get there, right?” Chloe asked in a panicked tone.

Max picked up the box and set it back in the bag. “I got them so I don’t ever misread your signals. I don’t want to think you want to make love to me and realize too late you didn’t. This way I know for certain if that day ever arrives.”

“But what if it doesn’t? Are you really going to want to stay with me if I never have sex with you?”

He took her hands in his. “If I grow old with you, and we’re never intimate, I will die the happiest man alive just because I have you.”

“You can’t seriously mean that.”

“I do.” Max gently took the candle from her lap and set it back in the bag. Then, he scooped up the rest of the items and dropped them in also. “You’re in the driver’s seat, babe. I’ll take my cues from you.”

Chloe shook her head. “You can’t be serious about all this. You need more from a girl.”

“I need you. I’m content reveling in the fact that you said you love me. That’s all I need right now.” He stood and kissed her forehead.

“I do love you,” Chloe whispered.

“And I love you. I suppose I better go get your Mom from therapy, huh? Do you want to come along?”

“Sure.” Chloe rose to her feet then froze in place.

Max frowned. “Is everything all right?”

She pried open the bag on the coffee table pulling out the gloves. With a sweet smile on her lips, she handed them to him. “Let’s get one out of the way.”

Max laughed as he tossed them on the table beside the front door. He laced his fingers between hers, wrapping her hand tight in his. “That sounds great to me.”

»»•««

Max slowly stepped out of his car as he stared at Hard Drive. Last night had been incredible. Just that one step he had taken with Chloe had brought them closer. He loved Liz’s reaction when they had walked into the hospital holding hands. It was like Christmas for Chloe’s mom. She had hugged them both then scolded that it had taken long enough for them to see they belonged together.

All night, Chloe came up with reasons to be near him, to brush his fingers with hers. Max happily obliged. It was a feat to make dinner with one hand, the other content to be laced with hers. She giggled as she tried to help with her free hand. He wasn’t sure how they managed to finish making the meal. All Max knew was that he planned to make dinner like that every night, with Chloe tucked close beside him, holding his hand.

He sighed as he stared at the building. That was last night. Was he going to get a repeat performance today? Or was their relationship going to be a secret?

“Come on, slow poke,” Chloe giggled. “We have to get to work.”

There it was. Her hand outstretched, waiting for his to complete it. He could feel a grin stretch his face as he wrapped his fingers around hers and led her to the building.

The sign of affection turned almost every head in the gym. Max heard a whine of protest come from the receptionist desk. He glanced over to Phoebe in time to catch the blonde’s indignant temper tantrum.
Like she should be upset. I’ve never shown any interest in her.
He kissed Chloe’s cheek before she pulled free and scampered off to the locker room.

Rico, Dan, and Mark looked puzzled as he approached. He smiled at them. Rico glanced toward the locker room before he spoke.

“Hey, Max. We three were talking about going out Saturday night. You want to come?”

“Sorry, guys. I’ve given up drinking,” Max answered.

“We don’t drink, either. This is right up your alley. Trust me.”

“Sure, then. I guess I’m in.”

Dan shot his own uneasy glance toward the locker room. “Do you need to run it past Chloe?”

“I’ll talk to her later. She’ll be all right with it.” Max pulled a pair of gloves on and motioned Rico toward the mat. He waved Mark and Dan to the other one.

“Is Chloe going to be all right with this?” Rico protested.

Max sighed. “That, I don’t know.”

Max and Rico started sparring. As normal, the gym fell to a hush as they fought. As they separated, Max glanced to the side of the mat. Here it was. The moment of truth. His eyes met Chloe’s. She stared at him then shrugged before hustling off to work with the girls. Max followed behind her.

“Chloe,” he called to get her attention.

She turned. “Yeah. What’s up?”

He glanced back. “I just thought…”

“Thought what?”

“I’d get more of a response.”

“You’re really good. You’ve must have done this before.” She clenched her hands to her hips. “And you gave me grief over keeping a secret from you.”

“In retrospect, I was unfair to you. I should have shared my secret when you shared yours.”

“Spill then.”

He glanced behind her at the waiting women. He motioned to Rico to start her class then led her into the hallway. “It’s going to take more time than you have right now.”

“Abbreviate it. Did you used to train?”

Max took a deep breath. “I used to fight. In college. Until I got hurt.”

“Why was it a big deal not to tell me?”

“I didn’t know how you would react. I didn’t want to scare you away.”

“You should have had faith in me.”

“I know. I’m sorry. You mean the world to me. I couldn’t lose you.”

“You wouldn’t have lost me. Did you like it?”

“I loved it. At least until I screwed up my knee. You’re all right with this?”

A smile crept across her face. “It was kind of sexy.”

He grinned. “Really?”

“Yep. I need to save my girls from Rico before he starts asking for phone numbers.”

“I couldn’t agree more.”

“No more secrets?”

“That’s it. You now know my deep, dark past.”

“Noted.” She laughed as she gave him a quick hug before hurrying back to her class. Max chuckled, relieved, as he strode off to face off with Rico again.

Max wondered the entire week what the guys had planned for their guys night out. He asked for hints. He got none. The closest he got to a clue was the advice to dress comfortable. Not jeans comfortable. Gym shorts comfortable.

He talked to Chloe about his night out. She didn’t object, but she didn’t approve either. He assured her it was just a night out with the guys. There would be no clubs and no women. It didn’t seem to put her heart at ease.

He kissed her on the cheek as Rico pulled up to the house to pick him up. He didn’t miss the scowl on her face as he said good-bye and jogged to the car.

They chatted as Rico drove nearly across town until they reached the city’s newest, state-of-the-art gym. The place made Roadie’s look like a hole in the wall. Mark and Dan stood outside, waiting for them.

“Okay, what’s this about?” Max inquired.

“Guys’ night. Hard Drive has some great workout equipment. Don’t get me wrong. But not like this place. They’re giving out month-long trial memberships.”

Max laughed. “Then let’s go workout.”

Signing up only took a couple minutes. Before long, they were off to find the free weights room. Rico slipped two-hundred fifty pounds on the bench press bar and offered for Dan to have a shot. They were all amazed when he lifted it with relatively little difficulty.

“So, Max. Answer a question that we’ve wondered about all week. Is it you? Is it Chloe? Or is it you and Chloe? Like a couple?” Mark asked.

“It’s Chloe and me. We’re a couple,” Max confirmed.

“Well, we got the holding hands thing, like you’re in middle school. Have you kissed her?”

“Yes.”

“And?”

“And nothing. There’s nothing to tell. I love her. I’m not rushing things.” Max sighed. “A guy…” He took a deep breath to suppress his rage. “Hurt her. Raped her. I’d say that, between her Cyclic Vomiting and what happened to her, she’s gone through hell. But that would be sugar-coating it.”

The three men stared at him. “Max, I’m sorry,” Mark said softly.

“Nothing to be sorry about, guys. She’s got the CVS under control. Mark, that’s because of you. I won’t let anything else happen to her. So, let’s get back to lifting.”

They nodded in agreement. Dan sat up and let Rico have a turn.

The four men closed the gym. Famished from hours of exercise, they stopped at an all-night diner for something to eat. The whole night was full of talking, laughing, and light-natured ribbing.

“I’m glad you’re with Chloe,” Dan admitted. “You guys are cute. It’s kind of nice that one of us has a girl.”

“What about your girlfriend?” Mark pried. “Did you mis-wire her? Did the part you need not come in?”

“At least I can make a girlfriend to love me. That’s still more than you’ve got,” Dan snapped back.

“Down, boys,” Rico laughed. “And for the record, Max isn’t the only one with a girlfriend.”

“Really? Do we know her?” Dan pressed.

“Of course. It’s Phoebe,” Rico replied proudly.

“Wow. Congrats.” Max clapped him on the shoulder.

“Thanks. I’m still trying to figure her out. She’s hot one minute, cold the next.”

“Aren’t all women?” Mark chuckled. Just then, the waitress threw the tab down in front of Mark’s face and stomped away, her long, blonde ponytail swinging angrily behind her. All men sat silent for a moment before they roared in laughter.

Once home, Max quietly unlocked the front door. It had been a wonderful night with his best friends. He rubbed his shoulder. He hadn’t lifted that much in a long time. He was certainly going to be sore tomorrow. Max stepped inside the house and stopped.

Chloe sat in the middle of the sofa, her legs crossed beneath her and her arms crossed across her chest. She glared at the television.